Chapter Sixteen
‘It’s good to see you!’ Cancer declared when our grey haired father walked into the living room. It had been a week since my kidnapping.
The others crowded around him. He took the time to hug each one of them. Even Aries allowed himself to be embraced in a bear hug, although it looked weird because he was now twice his size.
‘Pisces, I’m so sorry,’ Father said, coming over to me.
Sitting next to me on the sofa, he put his arm over my shoulder. I nestled into his side and felt the soft brush of his lips on my hair.
‘It’s not your fault.’
It was true. Being kidnapped came with the mission. I had re-read the book and it clearly said that others would not understand the twin flame relationship. It said that they would do anything to stop the union from being a success.
‘Have you ever been in other lifetimes with us? Were you our guardians before?’ I asked him.
His arm tensed and he pulled away from me. He looked into my eyes as a small smile came to his lips.
‘Many times,’ he said, nodding.
The others were quiet as they listened.
‘Pisces said that you’re our guardian. What about Mother? Is she our guardian, too?’ Aries asked.
Aries, the big dark haired warrior, had a burn mark on his cheek where Leo had breathed fire and caught him in the fight. They had managed to contain a couple of Nick’s men but they couldn’t find him anywhere.
‘She is your guardian, yes. The problem is, my children, we are human, too. We remember a lot more than you, because we need to protect you as best we can. However, we can still be influenced by energies and people while we’re here.’
‘Is that why you left?’ Sagi stepped forward. Her red hair glowed in the light coming through the window. ‘Mother said that you wanted us to give up on the mission.’
The others murmured their dissent. We had agreed not to mention anything to Father about him leaving. It was typical that someone had brought it up.
‘Give up? You’ve got to be kidding! I left because my heart was breaking. Love is tricky, even between the twin flames that don’t have a mission quite as important as yours.’
Father stroked my hand and I glanced up at him. The look in his eyes told me that he had been through it, too. The pain that had crippled me this week had been nothing to do with my kidnapping and everything to do with Antony’s running.
‘You and Mother are twin flames?’ Cancer asked.
Nodding, Father kept his gaze on me. ‘Every time we come back to help you, we have to go through a similar pattern. The running stage. When I left, it was because I didn’t want to go through it anymore.’
‘So you ran?’ I swallowed the tears that threatened to come into my eyes. My room had been my sanctuary for most of the week. Antony wouldn’t come back to me anytime soon and that ripped my insides out. ‘Are you still running from Mother?’ I whispered.
He shook his head and reached out to catch the tear that dropped from the corner of my eye. ‘I’m not but she is.’
His whispered words struck me as odd. There wasn’t just one runner in their relationship?
‘Surrender, my child and everything will come together as it should.’
The words made my skin warm. I squeezed his hand tight. He laughed but didn’t say anymore. It was so frustrating when they told me that. I was surrendered. I was playing it cool and allowing but nothing happened. I hadn’t heard from Antony since he left. He hadn’t even checked to make sure I was okay. That’s what hurt the most.
‘I don’t think he’s ready,’ Aries said, reading my thoughts.
He wrenched his head to the side. The crack of his neck sounded around the room and made me wince. His eyes were haunted. I wondered what was wrong with him.
‘I don’t think she’s ready,’ Cancer countered.
I growled and she looked at the floor. My siblings had given me their opinions since Antony had left. The more they did, the less I appreciated them. At first it had helped me to try and analyse, but in the end, I had wound myself up even more.
‘Did he say anything before he left?’ my father whispered to me as the others started to chatter amongst themselves.
My mind flashed back to the kiss and my cheeks blushed.
‘Just that he was scared.’
He nodded once and stood. ‘When you release your own fear, his will also evaporate. Live life, Pisces. You’ll be safe for a while. Nick will back off during the running stage.’
‘Why can’t we kill him?’ I asked.
The others fell silent when they heard my question.
‘What do you mean we can’t kill him? I have every intention of killing him.’ Aries cracked his knuckles.
He leant against the doorframe, his favourite spot for lording over us.
‘We all have soul contracts, as you know. He’s not allowed to kill us; we’re not allowed to kill him. It’s all part of the bigger plan. You’ll learn more as your journeys unfold.’ Father patted my head. He was going to leave. He believed in being a distant guardian. He wanted us to be free to live our lives how we chose.
‘I wish I knew more about the bigger plan. It sucks to know that I’m part of it but don’t have a bloody clue what I’m supposed to be doing.’ Leo shook hands with Father.
‘I know, my boy, but everything will become clear as it evolves.’ Father turned before he walked through the open doorway. ‘Pisces, remember to surrender and allow. Love who you are so that another can love you unconditionally.’
My mouth dropped open. I found myself nodding as he winked at me. That was something the book had mentioned, too. If we could love ourselves, we would speed up the process of harmonisation.
‘What’s it like?’ Scorpio said, coming to sit next to me.
‘It’s heart wrenching,’ I replied, smiling softly when his eyebrows pulled together.
‘Can’t you just get on with it? Tell him how you feel and sort it out?’
I laughed. ‘You’re a fine one to talk. Would you let someone know how you felt?’
Scorpio was the worst one of us all. He didn’t have a clue how to be honest about the way he was feeling. He buried his emotions deep down so no one could get close.
‘Well, I’ve not been there yet, so how would I know?’ He sat back and crossed his arms over his chest.
I instantly recognised the defensive gesture and stopped myself from mirroring him. Staying where I was, I reached out for his hand. He grudgingly let me take it but the scowl on his face remained.
‘You heard Father. I just need to relax about everything.’
‘You…? Relax…?’ Aries said. ‘I’ve never known anyone so serious.’
I laughed as he picked up the remote control from the cabinet and pressed a button. A burst of music filled the room.
‘Yep, this will make us unwind,’ he shouted as he started to dance around the room.
He offered lap dances to the women but they all refused. He came over to me, grabbed my hand and pulled me up. I let him. He was right. I always tried to control everything. Once in a while, I needed someone to pull me along with their energy.
‘See, you’re a good dancer. We’ll make a stripper out of you yet.’
Aries started to strip off his shirt. He grabbed Leo and pulled him to the centre of the room. I loved to see the childish side to Aries. His personality swung between broody and immature. I giggled as Leo peeled his top over his head and threw it in Scorpio’s face. The others laughed as Scorpio tutted and picked the shirt off with two fingers.
‘The water signs need to loosen up,’ Aries shouted.
Cancer jumped up and started to gyrate her hips. She never had trouble loosening up around men. I often wished I had some of her flirty ways.
‘You lot are mad,’ Scorpio said, storming from the room.
‘He’s so boring.’ Leo put his arm around my shoulder.
‘We need to go to a club,’ Aries said as the others w
andered off to do their own thing.
‘I think I’m all right for the moment.’ I took the remote control from Leo and turned the music down. The short dance had proved effective. I was ready to get back to normality.
‘I’m changing my job,’ I announced.
The others stopped dancing. I left them to mutter between themselves. I meant to go to my room but stopped when something called me to the front door. I followed my instinct and ended up standing on top of the townhouse steps.
‘How did you know I was here?’
He sat on the bottom step, his arms resting on his thighs. I looked at the back of his head as my heart played like a drumstick against my ribcage.
‘I didn’t, something made me…’
He got up and spun towards me. ‘I didn’t want to see you.’
I grabbed my chest as pain exploded through me. ‘Then why did you come?’ I snapped as badly as he had but it hurt. He was hurting me.
Antony shook his head and ran up the steps, coming to stand on the one just below me. I reached out to put my hand on his chest. He folded his fingers around mine and looked into my eyes.
‘You make me feel…’ he whispered, tapping his chest with our entwined hands.
‘You make me…’
‘Don’t.’ He leant forward and rubbed his nose against mine. ‘When I see you, a rush of emotion overtakes me and I can’t even think.’
His lips were close to mine. I wanted to lean forward and touch him with my tongue but we needed to talk.
‘That’s how I feel, Antony. I want to be with you.’
His eyes widened and he started to pull back. I put my arms around his neck but he took my hands and moved them away.
‘This is crazy. It’s not real.’
‘Why do you say that? Why are you fighting?’
I went to move forward as he backed down the steps but he put up a hand.
‘Don’t run from me,’ I whispered as his feet touched the pavement and he turned.
Following him as he started to run seemed like my best option. He glanced over his shoulder and noticed that I was chasing him. I couldn’t let him go again.
‘Please, Antony,’ I cried.
A part of me knew that I should stop. He was running fast. Only pure determination made me keep him in sight. I should have let him go but something made me stick with him. My chest burned as I tried to pull air into my lungs. Tears streamed down my face as I watched his back retreat.
‘Careful!’ someone shouted.
The river was ahead. Antony ran towards one of the pedestrian bridges. He dodged past people. I somehow managed to keep him in sight. My father’s voice came into my head. I needed to surrender. Running after my twin flame wasn’t going to work.
I had just started to cross the bridge when I stopped. Antony was ahead. He climbed on the railings and looked back. His gaze locked with mine before his body pitched forward.
I screamed as he fell down into the river. The clouds were dark and the water was murky. Others shouted to call the police. I rushed to the side of the bridge and looked down. He didn’t rise to the surface. I climbed over the side and threw myself in. I heard the echo of more screams as I plunged into the water.
The ice-cold liquid swallowed me and I gasped in a breath. I didn’t choke as the water filled my lungs and for the thousandth time, I wondered how I could breathe underwater. I started to float up. I pushed the top of my body forward and kicked my legs. The heavy denim of my jeans pulled me back but I was determined to find Antony. Why had he jumped in?
It was hard to see in the dingy water. I swum towards the middle of the river and plunged deeper. My arms reached forward to push the water behind me when something caught my eye. Antony was wearing a light blue shirt. He was still conscious but he was struggling.
I tried to swim towards him. The current suddenly picked up and pushed me downstream. Swimming through it, I breathed in deep to try and get more energy. Antony wrestled with something but I couldn’t see what it was in the dark water.
Coming up behind him, I managed to grab his shoulder. I hadn’t thought it through. When my hand made contact, he jumped and his mouth shot open. I wrapped my arms around him and put my mouth over his as best as I could. I breathed into him, putting my hand on his chest to check that air entered his lungs. When I pulled away, he nodded and pointed to his leg. It was caught on rope attached to the riverbed.
I looked at his face. He still struggled to breathe. His cheeks were puffed out and his eyes bulged. Placing my mouth over his, I blew into him again. I had no idea how it worked but he looked relieved when I pulled away. I swam down to his leg and managed to untangle the rope.
When he was free, he started to drift and I had to get hold of the leg I had just released. He put his hands under my armpits and pulled me up. I wrapped myself around him completely and kissed him before breathing more air into his lungs.
The current took us downstream but we didn’t take any notice. I tried to push us to the surface. It took a few attempts. I was tired and Antony was almost unconscious. When we finally broke out of the water, we both sucked in air.
‘Are you okay?’ I asked as we floated.
I tried to steer us towards the edge of the river.
‘I’m sorry,’ he spluttered as water splashed into his face. ‘I don’t know what came over me.’
Shaking my head, I swallowed as my throat threatened to close. Tears sprung to my eyes. A shout came from above. A policeman was by the side of the river. My energy was gone. I could no longer fight. I didn’t want to run but I would let Antony go. I would never chase him again.
‘Pisces,’ he whispered.
‘I’m sorry,’ I whispered back, avoiding eye contact.
I couldn’t look at him. It hurt too much. I had only known the man for a while but he had turned my whole world into something I didn’t recognise. He had turned me into someone I didn’t know.
The police dragged us out near one of the banks. People had gathered. They took pictures and chatted amongst themselves as we were escorted to separate ambulances.
‘Pisces, we need to talk,’ Antony called as he was led away.
I ignored him. My mind was trying to process what had happened. Climbing into the back of the ambulance, I started my routine check over.
‘Your vital signs are fine. I’m surprised you’re both still conscious. You were underwater for quite a while.’ The paramedic moved around but I didn’t reply. My brain couldn’t concentrate on what was happening.
‘Can I go home?’ I asked, looking out of the open door.
‘After the police interview you, yes.’
A policeman climbed in at her gesture and sat opposite me. He took a statement as he questioned me. Antony was going through the same thing in the other ambulance. My chest tightened. He was better off without me in his life. He had been in danger since the moment we had met.
‘Right, you’re free to go. Can I call anyone to come and get you?’ the officer said.
‘No, I live nearby.’ I thanked him and left.
Antony gave his statement in the other ambulance. I paused as I saw the look on his face. He looked lost. I had made him that way.
‘Pisces!’
Aries and Leo came towards me. I ducked around the back of the ambulance so Antony couldn’t see that I had finished. The boys followed me. I grabbed their hands and told them to take me home.
‘How did you know I was here?’ I asked as Leo put his arm around me. They pushed their way through the crowd, pulling me along with them.
‘We saw you on television! What the bloody hell happened?’ Aries hissed. ‘We need to keep a low profile and there you are, jumping off a bloody bridge!’
Sorrow climbed over me. I swallowed it down.
‘Just get me home,’ I croaked.
Leo shook his head at Aries when he opened his mouth. They didn’t say any more and I was grateful.
I didn’t notice how fast our legs carried
us home. It wasn’t until we got to the foot of the steps that I realised Leo had actually carried me most of the way.
‘I need to go to bed,’ I whispered.
Sprinting up the steps, I ran through the kitchen and straight into my room. I was glad the others were talking in the living room. I needed to be alone.
‘Will you let me in?’ Cancer called from the hallway.
The boys had sent her to talk to me. Ignoring her, I started to pack a bag. It was time to leave, once and for all. My mission could bugger off; I wasn’t prepared to do it anymore. Tears ran down my cheeks and I let them. There was no use in fighting.
A niggling voice inside told me that I was turning into the runner but it didn’t stop me. I was worth more than this. I needed a man that wanted me, not someone I craved that couldn’t stand the sight of me. So much so, he had jumped into a river.
‘I’ll leave you alone but I’ll be back later,’ Cancer called. Her footsteps faded. I opened the bedroom window and threw my bag over the ledge.
Climbing into the back courtyard, I made my escape out of the gate. I had no idea where I was going. I needed out. I was done with fighting.