Read Players, Bumps and Cocktail Sausages Page 2


  Ben nodded. “Spill. ”

  “No. Women talk. Men drink, so, Cole, it’s your round. ”

  “I’d ask why it’s my turn first, but I have a feeling it’s to do with the fact that I’m sleeping with your sister. ” He smirking as he got up and walked to the bar. “You need to get over that, by the way,” he called over his shoulder.

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  Not likely.

  Ten minutes later, Brad pulled out a chair. “Hey, Hol,” he said.

  I looked up and apart from being a bit older Holly hadn’t changed much at all. She still wore dark eye make-up that would scare the shit out of you if you woke up beside it – the panda eyes would be immense. She did have a rockin’ body though – mostly hidden under a long top – and no longer dressed like she was on the set of a Marilyn Manson video as much.

  “Holly,” I said. Good job growing up, minus the make-up thing.

  She smiled and blushed. Still just as shy.

  “Hi, Jasper. Hey, Ben. ”

  “Alright,” Ben replied and stood. “What’re you drinking? Cole’s just gone up. ”

  “Um, vodka and lemonade, please?”

  He nodded and took off to the bar.

  “Thanks for inviting me; I was going crazy at home with mum and dad. ”

  “Just don’t embarrass me,” Brad replied.

  “Whoa, let’s not be so hasty,” I said. “Share with the group, Holly. Has he ever done anything like getting his old chap stuck in a hoover?”

  Holly’s cheeks flamed, and Brad frowned.

  “Jesus. What’s wrong with you, Jasper?”

  I laughed.

  “That’s a yes. So, what’s uni like? I really hope it’s all American Pie. Do you get a lot of action?”

  Her eyes widened.

  “Oh, are you a virgin?”

  “Jasper, for fuck sake!” Brad punched my arm. “You are, though, aren’t you?”

  I couldn’t help the big grin on my face as Holly looked down at the table. I couldn’t work out if she was and embarrassed – which she shouldn’t be anyway – or she wasn’t and didn’t want to talk about it in front of her brother.

  Cole – inadvertently becoming Holly’s saviour – returned to the table with a tray with far too many drinks for five people. Holly blushed again.

  “Thank you,” she said as she took her drink from Cole.

  “You’re welcome,” he replied, not even noticing her pink cheeks.

  “Shots. Three for Jasper and two for the rest of us. Holly, I got you some too but if you don’t want to take them Jasper will. ”

  “Oh, will he?” I replied sarcastically.

  Cole held his hands up. “You asked us to get you shitfaced. ”

  “I did. Hand them over. ” I was getting drunk because my wife was off with God knows who again. I hadn’t met all of her colleagues. Well I had, but I never paid any attention to them because they all seemed boring. Apparently I wasn’t giving them a chance because I had only met them at the school where she worked, and they were fun outside it. I hadn’t failed to notice how I never got invited out with them to witness said fun.

  “I’m not really a shots kind of girl,” Holly said and smiled at me. “You can have mine. ”

  I narrowed my eyes. Were you even allowed into uni if you didn’t do shots?

  “Thanks. ” I lined my five up and took them one after another. “The hell is this, Cole?”

  He shrugged. “I asked for eleven of their strongest shots. ”

  Jesus did they give him paint stripper?

  Holly sipped her drink. She definitely wasn’t doing the uni thing properly.

  “So, what is tonight in aid of?”

  “Jasper’s having wife issues,” Cole replied.

  “Oh,” she said, wincing. “Sorry, Jasper. ”

  I shrugged.

  “You’re married now too, right?” she asked Cole.

  He nodded. “Two and a half months. ”

  “Congratulations. ”

  Cole smiled in response and got that blissful look on his face.

  “I bet you know the hours, too. ” I sneered.

  He stuck his middle finger up, and I laughed. Yeah, he definitely did.

  “Anyway, I thought I said no more talk of women and marriages? Holly, tonight you’re a man. ”

  “Thanks,” she said sarcastically.

  “Sorry, I just mean I don’t want any girlie talk. ”

  “Not really a girlie girl,” she replied. Yeah, I can tell. She was a good girl that was still half living in a badly done rebellious phase. Growing up she would dress like she wanted to rebel but never actually did anything wrong. It was like she didn’t know who she was yet. Although, who was I to judge? I wasn’t really sure I knew who I was any more, either.

  Things were easier when I was happily married, but now I didn’t know what Abby wanted, I didn’t know what I wanted. Well that wasn’t true. I did know: I wanted to have kids and grow old with my wife. But I couldn’t if she wanted something or someone else.

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  “Cole, more shots,” Ben said.

  Brad stood. “I’ll get these. ”

  “When do you go back then?” I asked Holly.

  She scooted over and sat on Brad’s chair, next to me as the DJ turned up the music.

  “Not until October, so I have a long, boring summer here. ”

  Almost four months off! She didn’t know how damn lucky she was; I wish I got that much time off work. How the hell could universities charge so much money when you were hardly there?

  “Where are your friends?”

  “I didn’t have many friends in high school, and the ones I did have either settled down or moved away. I’m catching up with Amy when she’s back from Tenerife soon though. ”

  Do I know who Amy is? “Right,” I replied, not knowing what to say.

  “Well your brother’s coming to my stepdad’s barbecue on Friday. Come too, if you want. ”

  “Yeah? He wouldn’t mind?”

  “Nope. ” Miles was too laid back to care if I brought an elephant along with me. My mum, however…

  Mum would love Holly. In a way, Holly reminded me a little of Oakley – the shyness and how she looked almost as if she would shatter if you shouted boo at her.

  “Thank you. ”

  I shrugged. “No worries. ”

  “So… do you want to talk about your wife issues?”

  I arched my eyebrow. “You’re going to give me advice? Have you ever been in a relationship?”

  Her cheeks reddened.

  “Thought not. ”

  “I have a while ago, but it wasn’t really serious, we were together for eight months before school finished, and uni is really full on. ”

  “Of course it is. Holly, you don’t have to be embarrassed, you’re still really young. ”

  “I’m not embarrassed. ” Then why did you go beetroot? “Anyway, if Brad tells me correctly, you’ve not exactly had any meaningful relationships apart from Abby. ”

  “What the hell has he told you?” I asked, smiling tightly.

  “That you slept around and broke hearts. ”

  I held my finger up.

  “Uh-uh. I may not have been a good boy, but I never promised anyone anything. They knew the score as well as I did. It was just sex. ”

  “Such class,” Ben said, shaking his head. I glared but let it go.

  Now I wasn’t exactly proud of sleeping with as many women as I had – sixty-eight – but I wasn’t exactly ashamed either. Sure I would have preferred Abby to not have cheated on me when we were teens, ripped my heart out and left me an empty mess, but she did, and then I slept around. But that was in the past, and I had no desire to go back to that.

  “I think it’s sweet that you changed so much for your wife,” Holly said, sipping her drink as if she was
afraid it was the last one she would ever get.

  Technically I had changed because of Abby twice. And I really wanted this to be it.

  “Yeah or pathetic. ” Ben grinned. “Although not as pathetic as Cole. ”

  “Good,” I said, “because Oakley deserves the best. ” And the most pathetically in love idiot, I added in my head. She deserved someone that was willing to wait for a thousand years for her.

  “Aw. The nicest thing Brad has ever said about me is that I’m not that ugly,” Holly said.

  Ben laughed, and I felt like I should have said something to explain, but I didn’t want to bring up the past. Tonight was supposed to be fun and what had happened to my sister made me violently angry.

  Me and Oakley were close, and I would die for her in a heartbeat. We’d been through something that meant we could never have a distant brother/sister relationship, not that I wanted that anyway. My mum, sister and niece were three people I would kill for, no questions asked.

  “Brad’s a dick. You’re definitely not ugly,” Ben said. She definitely wasn’t, but no one found their sibling attractive – well, some probably did, but those were the people that would have eleven-fingered children.

  Holly blushed at Ben’s back-handed compliment and muttered a shy, “Thank you. ”

  “God you and Brad are so different. You sure you’re related?” I said.

  “Hold up,” Ben said, “you and Oakley couldn’t be more different either. She’s smart, beautiful, funny, and you’re. . . . ”

  “Thank you,” I said sarcastically. “Anyway, can we please cut the small talk and get me so drunk I can’t even remember my own name?”

  They did.

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  I woke up and groaned. My head was pounding, and my tongue felt like sandpaper. How fucking much had I drunk last night?

  “How’re you feeling?” Abby asked, leaning over me. She sounded pissed off. Why was she pissed off? I was the one who was allowed to be pissed off here.

  “My head… It hurts. ”

  “Not surprised. Brad and Cole had to carry you home. Some girl gave me your phone. ” She raised her eyebrow, waiting for an explanation. Yes, Abby, I brought the girl I cheated on you home with me. Jesus!

  “Holly,” I said. “Brad’s sister. ”

  “She’s pretty. ”

  Dangerous fucking territory.

  I shrugged. “She’s alright. ” Holly was pretty under the eye make-up. Her naivety and that good girl thing she had going on made me doubt she would ever cheat. If anything she would be cheated on, like I was.

  “How old is she?”

  “Twenty. ”

  Abby sat down, and I knew I’d said something wrong.

  “You know a lot about her then?”

  “Are you for real? Ben said we should invite her because she knows no one here and I asked if she was old enough to be drinking in a pub and Brad told me her age. ” Was she seriously quizzing me? I would never do anything to hurt her, and she knew that. Or she should know that.

  “Okay, I’m sorry. I just don’t like women thinking they have a chance with my hubby that’s all. ”

  Since when did carrying a phone become payment for animal sex in a pub bathroom?

  “You trust me?”

  “Of course I do, baby, I just get jealous. I wouldn’t be normal if I didn’t. ”

  But jealous of someone holding my phone?

  “Alright. What time is it?”

  “Almost eleven. We need to leave in an hour so take these,” she replied, handing me two white painkillers and nodding to a glass of water on the bedside table. “I’m gonna have a shower. Do you need any clothes ironing for today? Know what you’re wearing?”

  “Jeans and a T-shirt. ” Miles’ birthday, not dinner with the queen.

  “Okay. ” She kissed my cheek and left the room. I hated that we were stressed at each other more than we were happy now. We needed something to get back to how it was just a few months ago; things had become mundane and pretty shit. A dirty weekend away. That would do it. I wanted a whole weekend with no clothes and my wife in as many positions as possible.

  I heard the shower turn on and got hard. Abby in the shower seemed like a damn appealing idea right now. After downing the pills and taking a huge gulp of water, I went to the bathroom. She was washing her hair in the shower; the suds streamed down her back making my mouth water.

  “Room for me?” I asked.

  She spun around as if she thought I was a murderer. “Jasper, you scared me. I’m almost done, babe, we don’t have long. ”

  Another rain check then.

  I stripped as she quickly finished washing her hair and got out.

  “So, what did we get him?” I asked Abby as I drove over to Cole and Oakley’s place. It was Miles’ birthday but since my sister’s garden was massive the party was at their house.

  Abby put herself in charge of presents after the condom incident on Cole’s birthday after Everleigh was born.

  I rattled the neatly wrapped present. It wasn’t a watch-shaped present. Why wasn’t it watch-shaped? Watches weren’t flat and floppy but this was.

  “A shirt your mum picked out when we were shopping last weekend. ”

  Okay, a shirt definitely wasn’t a watch. I looked at Abby and mentally cursed her blank expression. Why wasn’t she giving anything away, and why couldn’t I just man up and ask her? Have you turned back into a cheater, Abby?

  “Did you pick up Everleigh’s headband?”

  “Damn it,” I muttered.

  Abby sighed. “Jasper, we’ve had that almost a week now. ”

  “Sorry. She can get it tonight. ”

  “I’ll make sure she gets it. ”

  How had Abby changed so quickly? She’d been acting weird for a little while now. At first I thought it was just because her parents were separating, but I don’t think so now. Her parents fought for most of her life, and she said she was relieved they were finally breaking up. So what the fuck was up with her? Another man was the only conclusion I could come too. I hated it because I’d finally reached a place where I could trust her one hundred per cent again, and she was seriously screwing with that.

  Feeling deflated, I looked out of the window as we approached Oakley’s house. I should have just kept whoring around rather than forgiving her and settling down. That was much easier.

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  “Ready?” Abby asked, smiling at me as she opened her door.

  I nodded and got out, plastering a smile on my face. As soon as the front door opened and Everleigh ran outside my smile turned real.

  “Uncle Jasper,” she screamed. And I knew that no matter what happened with Abby, I would always have my favourite girl.

  Chapter Three

  I plucked Everleigh out of the air as she jumped at me. The kid could properly clear the floor. It was terrifying.

  “Hey, kiddo. ”

  “Don’t eat the chicken. Daddy said Grandad don’t cook it right,” she said, getting straight to the point. “Chicken that don’t cook right makes you hurt, doesn’t it?”

  It was hurl, and it was me, not Cole, that had told her when I was sick once that bad chicken made you hurl, but I was glad she’d got it mixed up. Saved me from Oakley’s yelling.

  “That’s right. Bad chicken makes your belly hurt. ”

  “Hey, girly,” Abby said, taking her from me. Everleigh started telling Abby about the chicken too so I took the opportunity to say hi to my mum, who was waiting by the front door – on granddaughter duty.

  “Hi, sweetheart,” Mum said, hugging me.

  “Hey. How’s it going?”

  “Good. I’m so happy everyone can be together again. It’s been too long. Abby,” she said, pushing past me. “How are you? It’s been a while. ”

  I tried not to think about why she wasn’t at my mum and Miles’
for dinner last week. It seemed that while I just wanted to knock her up and have a family, she just wanted to be young and go out again. I thought we were on the same page. When we got married, I thought – because she’d said – that we were going to start thinking about trying to have a baby. Usually I was quite good at finding the real message between what a woman said and what she actually fucking meant, but clearly I had mistaken ‘I can’t wait to have a family with you’ for ‘Sod off, I want my freedom. ’

  I followed them into the back garden, saying happy birthday to Miles before I grabbed my first beer of many.

  “Hey, man,” I said as Brad walked out to join me. Holly was just behind him, almost hiding. I nodded my head. “Holly. ”

  “Where’s the beer?” Brad asked, heading over to the cooler by the barbecue that I pointed out.

  “Hi. Thank you again for inviting me,” Holly said, biting the inside of her mouth.

  I shrugged. “No worries. Let me introduce you to my sister. Oakley!” Holly flinched, not realising I was about to shout, even though Oakley was at the other end of the garden.

  Instead of my sister, my niece ran over and stood in front of Holly, checking her out with a little scowl.

  “Do you like purple?” Everleigh asked her.

  “Um,” Holly muttered at the random question and then smiled, bending down a little. “I love purple, it’s my absolute favourite. ”

  “Mine too. ” Everleigh beamed and skipped off, and with that brief exchange, Holly had been accepted.

  “She’s cute. Your niece Everleigh, right?”

  “Yeah, and yeah she is. She likes you. ”

  She smiled. “You can tell from that?”

  “You like purple, and if she didn’t like you she would have held onto my hand and glared at you. ”

  Holly laughed. “Alright. ”

  “Hi,” Oakley said, finally getting to us. “You’re Holly, right?”

  “Yeah, hi. Thanks for letting me come. ”

  Oakley waved her hand. “Of course. You want something to drink? My mum’s making cocktails, can’t guarantee they’ll be nice, though. ”

  “Holly’s not a big drinker,” I said.

  “Okay,” Oakley replied slowly. “Well we have non-alcoholic stuff too. Come with me and we’ll find you something. ” They walked off, leaving me alone, chatting as they made their way into the conservatory that now looked like a brewery. How fucking much alcohol did they buy?

  “How come Holly’s here?” Abby asked, doing Everleigh’s ninja thing and just appearing in front of me.