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Poems From the Underground Volume 2

  By Jason Wallace

  ******

  Published by:

  Poems From the Underground Volume 2

  Copyright © 2011 by Jason Wallace

  *Disclaimer* I have attempted to denote any writings containing adult language. However, if I have failed to mark any of these writings, I apologize to those that are offended. Please know that it was in no way my intention to fail in marking such things.

  Just as Well

  I have no heart to satisfy

  I am what I've made myself

  Time, I find, tries to pass me by

  So fast, if nothing else,

  My life's a lie

   

  I have nothing good left

  But the rest, I guess, isn't worth it

  The best I possess

  Is a pain that hurts me

  What there is, I cannot tell

  But that's what I expect, so just as well

   

  Haunting me with open arms

  Grasping my all to suck me in

  Terror fills my mind so darkly

  Wondering if the loss is worth what we win

  If you could tell me what to feel or what to give

  Maybe I could finally learn to live

   

  I have nothing good left

  But the rest, I guess, isn't worth it

  The best I possess

  Is a pain that hurts me

  What there is, I cannot tell

  But that's what I expect, so just as well

  What I've had since before I fell

   

  Steal my soul, drain my life

  I have no control so I can't feel alive

   

  I have nothing good left

  But the rest, I guess, isn't worth it

  The best I possess

  Is a pain that hurts me

  What there is, I cannot tell

  But that's what I expect, so just as well

  I'm screaming inside but no one hears me yell

   

  I'm dying so slowly

  Why can't it kill me

  I'm trying to know me

  But no one does really

  I'm the kind to fall in line

  And quickly give up and fall behind

  Lose everything to gain so little

  Attempt to build myself but break

  With a will so brittle

   

  I have nothing good left

  But the rest, I guess, isn't worth it

  The best I possess

  Is a pain that hurts me

  What there is, I cannot tell

  But that's what I expect, so just as well

   

  I have nothing good left

  But the rest, I guess, isn't worth it

  The best I possess

  Is a pain that hurts me

  What there is, I cannot tell

  But that's what I expect, so just as well

   

  I have the time

  When I can sometimes grab it

  You could be mine

  But what I have left, will you have it

  Or will you leave me cold and lonely

  Feeling the same as always, broken open

  And knowing that I'm all I have only

   

  I have nothing good left

  But the rest, I guess, isn't worth it

  The best I possess

  Is a pain that hurts me

  What there is, I cannot tell

  But that's what I expect, so just as well

  It's just as good

  I don't see anything like they say I should

   

  I cannot breathe 

  I cannot hear

  Except everything that causes me fear

  I cannot change

  I cannot be

  Anything you ever thought of me

  But the worst you never need

  Now I know I never knew that you

  Would treat me so badly, the way you do

   

  I have nothing good left

  But the rest, I guess, isn't worth it

  The best I possess

  Is a pain that hurts me

  What there is, I cannot tell

  But that's what I expect, so just as well

  It's just for now

  I will only be around as long as you allow

   

  I have nothing good left

  But the rest, I guess, isn't worth it

  The best I possess

  Is a pain that hurts me

  What there is, I cannot tell

  But that's what I expect, so just as well

  Just as much, just as well

  Forever or just this once, just as well

  Just Like Today

  Who knew

  I'd miss you

  So much

  That the only peace I'd get

  Is fallin rain

  Those short moments long ago

  Weren't long enough

  And the long ones alone

  Just aren't the same

  It was all

  Just like today

   

  Every breath I take is empty

  And all the tears in me

  I used to cry

  Felt like a flood

  Washin over me

  Feelin like I would die

  All hope's gone away

  Because everything's just like today

   

  I met the girl of my dreams

  Who said she'd always stay

  And every moment since she left

  Has felt just like today

  Rainy and cloudy

  Miserable as I feel

  The weather, at least,

  Lets me know

  That feelin so bad is real

   

  Every breath I take is empty

  And all the tears in me

  I used to cry

  Felt like a flood

  Washin over me

  Feelin like I would die

  All hope's gone away

  Because everything's just like today

   

  Everything's blurry

  But everything's gray

  Everything's unassuring

  Just like today

   

  Just like today

  It's all nothing

  So much, it must be

  Completely dark this way

  Unloving, ugly

  Empty, coming

  To the point

  You have to say

  Make it go away

   

  Every breath I take is empty

  And all the tears in me

  I used to cry

  Felt like a flood

  Washin over me

  Feelin like I would die

  All hope's gone away

  Because everything's just like today

  Everything's plenty

  Of nothing but memories

  Of all that's gone to shame

  So much like today

  Just like today

  Couldn’t Give Enough

  Did you know 

  You still have my heart

  No matter where all you've been

  You left, too afraid it would fall apart,

  Too afraid you might let me in

   

  Tell me, where have you gone

  Now that you've given up

  Why'd you take somethin so right

  And turn it so wrong

  Did you not give

  Cuz you couldn't give enough

   


  What is it you thought it would mean

  The two of us in somethin so good

  Maybe caught somewhere between

  What it should be and

  What you feared it would

   

  Tell me, where have you gone

  Now that you've given up

  Why'd you take somethin so right

  And turn it so wrong

  Did you not give

  Cuz you couldn't give enough

  Couldn't give me love

  Did you run away

  Because I wasn't the dream you dreamed of

   

  Can you tell me how to

  Get over you

  Do you feel at all the same

  If ever my name

  Comes to your lips

  Or to your ears

  Do you wish I could be there

  Can I wish you were here

   

  Tell me, where have you gone

  Now that you've given up

  Why'd you take somethin so right

  And turn it so wrong

  Did you not give

  Cuz you couldn't give enough

   

  Tell me, where have you gone

  Now that you've given up

  Why'd you take somethin so right

  And turn it so wrong

  Did you not give

  Cuz you couldn't give enough

   

  Did you know 

  You still have my heart

  Barely Hangin’ On

  Why is it I

  Want you tonight

  Nobody else

  Not the ones that want me

  But the one who I felt

  Meant everything

  Brought to life

  Out of my dreams

  The one I know

  Who never seems

  To have the heart

  To ever be

  Anything I need

   

  The breath in me

  May just be

  My only destiny

  Livin this side of wrong

  I gave you everything I thought there was

  You took it all

  And then the rest of me

  And I'm barely hangin on

   

  If it could be that I

  Could look you now 

  In your eyes

  And tell you what I feel

  I know if you have a soul

  You could only start to cry

  So you'd finally see

  That everything there's been from me

  Has been everything that could be real

  We haven't talked in so long

  But no matter how much movin on

  You try to do

  I never don't think of you

  And I can want only you... still

   

  The breath in me

  May just be

  My only destiny

  Livin this side of wrong

  I gave you everything I thought there was

  You took it all

  And then the rest of me

  And I'm barely hangin on

   

  Barely breathing

  Barely hoping

  Barely being

  Barely coping

  Unfairly leaving

  You didn't care, we

  Were both deceiving

  Barely believing

  Were we even open

   

  The breath in me

  May just be

  My only destiny

  Livin this side of wrong

  I gave you everything I thought there was

  You took it all

  And then the rest of me

  And I'm barely hangin on

   

  You took everything

  And I'm barely hangin on

  When everything is gone

  Does it matter what went wrong

  Barely hangin on

   

  The breath in me

  May just be

  My only destiny

  Livin this side of wrong

  I gave you everything I thought there was

  You took it all

  And then the rest of me

  And I'm barely hangin on...

  Barely hangin on

   

  Did you ever treat me right

  Why is it I

  Want you tonight

  Didn’t Count

  Was I the one

  Who made her feel so alone

  That she cried

  What is it I've done

  Was it that I lied

  I can't remember doing that to her

  But memories are cruel

  The same as they always were

   

  Maybe the reason why I'm here alone

  Is that what I really had

  I didn't know

  I gave up long before

  She walked out

  And I thought her love was fake

  And didn't count

   

  Lookin back now

  I still see a blur

  So much I can't figure out

  Was I there for her

  The truth really is that I can't see

  Because tears have blinded 

  Away reality

  I can't help but wonder why

  When I had the chance

  I didn't try

   

  Maybe the reason why I'm here alone

  Is that what I really had

  I didn't know

  I gave up long before

  She walked out

  And I thought her love was fake

  And didn't count

   

  Maybe the reason why I'm here alone

  Is that what I really had

  I didn't know

  I gave up long before

  She walked out

  And I thought her love was fake

  And didn't count

   

  But if I could go back

  To change what went wrong

  I would let it all go the way it did

  So we could both move on

  All I can hope is that I will be

  Everything she used to think was me

   

  Maybe she would agree

  That all she thought she had

  Was a myth, a mystery

   

  Maybe the reason why I'm here alone

  Is that what I really had

  I didn't know

  I gave up long before

  She walked out

  And I thought her love was fake

  And didn't count

   

  I thought all we ever had

  Had already gone away and turned bad

  I couldn't tell that all she wanted

  Was to not have to doubt

  But I thought her love was fake

  And didn't count

  I thought her love was fake

  And didn't count

  Everything She Needs

  When somebody walks away

  You can't help but worry

  Wantin and wishin that it's you they're missin

  Waitin around and wonderin what's their hurry

   

  Every time I close my eyes

  I think about

  The one who... lied to me

  And every time I hear her name

  I go insane

  The same inside

  Knowin I tried to be

  Everything she needs

  So I have to ask

  What can that be

   

  Wasn't I two lovin arms

  To give her restless soul some peace

  Wasn't I 

  No regrets when all she wanted

  Was to forget

  The past that haunts her dreams

  Every time everything got to be

  Too much to take, too much to breathe
<
br />   Wasn't I

  Everything she needs

  Everything she needs

   

  I tried to let her go easy

  I thought maybe 

  She wanted somethin else

  And it couldn't be me

  So I made an excuse

  To make her choose

  And she chose to be free

  And I'm the one hangin on

  Imprisoned here, waitin on

  Her choice to change

  Hopin she will see

  That I really am

  Everything she needs

   

  Wasn't I two lovin arms

  To give her restless soul some peace

  Wasn't I 

  No regrets when all she wanted

  Was to forget

  The past that haunts her dreams

  Every time everything got to be

  Too much to take, too much to breathe

  Wasn't I

  Everything she needs

  Everything she needs

   

  Wasn't I her place of rest

  Maybe I didn't understand

  But that's all I wanted

  And I wanted to be the best

  Wasn't I nothin I

  Thought I always was

  Tryin so hard to not fall apart

  Wishin the worries would wash away

  Because

   

  Wasn't I two lovin arms

  To give her restless soul some peace

  Wasn't I 

  No regrets when all she wanted

  Was to forget

  The past that haunts her dreams

  Every time everything got to be

  Too much to take, too much to breathe

  Wasn't I

  Everything she needs

  Everything she needs

  Wasn't that me

   

  Wasn't I two lovin arms

  To give her restless soul some peace

  Wasn't I 

  No regrets when all she wanted

  Was to forget

  The past that haunts her dreams

  Every time everything got to be

  Too much to take, too much to breathe

  Wasn't I

  Everything she needs

  Everything she needs

   

  When somebody walks away

  You can't help but worry

  Wantin and wishin that it's you they're missin

  Waitin around and wonderin what's their hurry

  Better

  I sometimes think

  That my wounds will all heal

  But I come to find

  That I know they never will

  I used to be happy

  I used to feel good

  I thought life would be more

  Than getting by, and I would

  Find something more 

  Than all I knew before

  Not live like a bore

  And have something to be living for

  I want to feel useful

  I want to be sound

  But every day 

  I can barely find a way

  To get through with no one around

   

  How do I take it

  How can I be

  More than so empty

  More than just me

  Not so helpless

  Not so insecure

  Knowing my life

  Will be better for sure

   

  Being alone for so very long

  Isn't so bad

  If you can feel right

  Instead of feeling so wrong

  I don't belong here

  I don't want to be

  All that I'm made of

  And what I can't see

  Inside so broken

  Secretly hoping

  That one day, just one

  I might be put together

  Instead of forever... coming undone

   

  How do I take it

  How can I be

  More than so empty

  More than just me

  Not so helpless

  Not so insecure

  Knowing my life

  Will be better for sure

   

  How can I make it