"Of course, I'm hoping for a boy," Lizzie said, delighted by his obvious
glee.
Jass chuckled happily. "A baby! Thank you, Lizzie."
She smiled sweetly. "Well, you did have something to do with it, Jass,"
she said, and felt grown-up, for the first time in her life.
The soup was spent with plans of fixing up the nursery, and possible
names for boys, and finding a good slave to be nanny, and when the main
course was served, Jass decided they needed champagne. Parson Dick
offered to fetch it, but Jass loved choosing the right bottle of wine for
the right occasion.
418 ALEX HALEY'S QUEEN
The two men went to the cellar together, where Parson Dick offered his
congratulations, and Jass had an idea.
They all drank the new baby's health in sparkling wine, and Jass told them
of his plan.
"We could bring Queen here to live," he said. "As a companion for him. Or
her. They'd grow up as friends and she'd scare away the black bogeyman."
He was surprised at the silence that greeted him. Sally could guess
Lizzie's feelings.
"Do you think it's quite wise, Jass?" she said. Jass was a little Put out.
"I think it's an excellent idea, Mother," he retorted.
He did not hear Lizzie's still, small voice saying, "No."
50
Queen woke up because she heard voices. They were not loud, but they sounded
cross. It surprised her, because she knew it was her mammy and the Massa,
and they didn't get angry with each other usually. They were in the only
other room, where her gran'pappy used to sleep before she was bom, and she
lay in her cot near the loom and tried to work out what was wrong. She hoped
the Massa wasn't angry with her mammy, because she didn't want her mammy to
be whipped, like Isaac had been the other day by the new white man who had
come to work here. As she listened, she began to realize they were talking
about her, and she got very scared because she didn't want to be whipped,
either. She tried to think of things she'd done wrong, but she didn't think
she'd done anything bad recently, and then she realized that her mammy
sounded sad as well as cross. She heard Mammy say, "No," quite loudly, but
she could not make out what the Massa was saying, so she sneaked out of bed
and walked on tippy-toe to their door to listen.
"It's for the best," she heard the Massa say. There was a
MERGING 419
little silence, and she knew her mammy was crying, not real tears but
crying inside, where it really hurts.
"She all I got," Mammy said, very softly.
When the Massa spoke again, he sounded kind again.
"She'll still be yours," he said, and Queen thought he must have kissed
Mammy. "But she'll live in the big house, that's the only difference, and
be companion to my little boy."
Queen was puzzled. She liked the idea of living in the big house; they
had a lot of parties there, and it wasn't very far away. But she didn't
know who the Massa's boy was; he didn't have a little boy as far as Queen
knew. Perhaps that was why he was always so nice to her.
Mammy said something else, which Queen couldn't hear properly, about Miss
Lizzie, and then the Massa sounded angry again.
"Lizzie won't harm a hair of her head," Massa said. "I'll see to that."
They must mean her, and Mammy must think Miss Lizzie was going to do
something nasty to Queen. Queen crept back to her bed. The idea of living
in the big house was fun, but not if Miss Lizzie was going to be nasty
to her, and even though the weaving house wasn't very far away, it was
far enough. But the Massa would save her, he'd said so.
She snuggled into bed and lay dreaming of parties at the big house, and
pretty dresses. Perhaps she might even get to sleep in one of those big
beds with a post at each comer and some material over the top like a
tent. Mammy had shown her one when they went visiting the big house once,
and Queen loved those beds. You could crawl inside, into the nice soft
sheets they had there, much softer than the blanket Queen slept under,
and you could close the curtains at the sides of the bed, and no one in
the world could find you. Then she thought of living away from Mammy, and
she got scared again. She wondered if Miss Lizzie would let her see Mammy
when she wanted to, and Gran'pappy and Tiara, who was very old and very
kind, and all the people she loved. She didn't like Miss Lizzie, who
always seemed cross, and she had seen Miss Lizzie hit one of the slave
girls once when the Massa was away. Queen didn't want Miss Lizzie to hit
her, and if the Massa was away, and Miss Sally was old and resting, like
she sometimes did, what would she do? She wished she could
420 ALEX HALEY'S QUEEN
close some curtains around her own little bed now, because she didn't want
anyone in all the world to find her.
Jass was angry. He couldn't understand why everybody was so against his
splendid idea. Lizzie had been pouting ever since dinner, and then Sally
had spoken to him quietly when Lizzie had gone upstairs to bed with a
headache. Sally was in a quandary. She loved the idea of Queen living with
them, but she understood Lizzie's feelings, for to bring Easter's daughter
into the house was a considerable slap in the face. Sally tried to present
Lizzie's point of view, but the more she argued, the more stubborn Jass
became. It wasn't as if the child was to be brought up as one of their
own-she would still be a slave-but it would be good for her, good for the
new baby, good for all of them to have that dear little creature running
round. He didn't tell Sally of his real affection for Queen, nor of his
true reason for wanting her in the big house-to protect her from the other
slaves. Perhaps he didn't understand those reasons himself. He did
understand that he wanted some influence over Queen's education, for even
as he rejected his paternity on any official basis, he loved her and
wanted her to have the best life he could give her. He and Sally had some-
thing of a row, but, as he said, he was the Massa, and his wishes
prevailed.
He came to see Easter, to give her the good news, and she was still as
against it as Sally and Lizzie. She seemed to feel that she would lose
Queen somehow, and he got angry with heir. She'd still see the girl every
day, and he had thought she would be proud to have her daughter brought
up in such comfort and luxury, with such advantages. Part of Easter
agreed with him. She knew the child would now be exposed to a life that
Easter could never give her, and she wanted that for her daughter,
although she had no idea what eventual use it might be to her. Mostly,
she knew she would miss Queen, no matter how often she saw her. She would
no longer affect the girl's upbringing, no longer have her to cherish on
the cold nights when Jass was not with her, no longer be responsible for
the flesh of her flesh. She also dreaded Lizzie's reaction, and what
<
br /> Lizzie might do to Queen. She thought that this was how her own mother
must have felt when she learned that she was to
MERGING 421
be sold away from her only child, and she wept for herself, and the mother
she Could scarcely remember.
Jass saw the tears, and tried to kiss them away, and put a positive face
on the prospects for Queen. In the end, Easter had to agree. She had no
choice. He was the Massa.
And he was her love. His comforting caresses changed to intimate
endearments, and she gave herself to him, as she always would, and gave
him the most dear thing that was hers to give.
She put a brave face on it, and told her daughter the good news, and was
surprised by Queen's reaction. It seemed to come as no surprise to the
girl. She listened gravely to her mother, and was silent for a little
while afterward, and then asked if Miss Lizzie would beat her.
She looked so lost and frightened, and so very tiny at that moment, far
too small to be setting off on so great an adventure, that all Easter
wanted to do was hold her close and run away somewhere with her, and keep
her safe from Miss Lizzie and all the nasty things that might happen to
her in life, r-un away even from Jass.
She didn't run away. She couldn't: She had nowhere to go, nor the genuine
desire to leave. She held her daughter close and whispered to her that
the Massa and Miss Sally wouldn't let anyone hurt her. Queen stared into
her eyes, as if looking to see if she was telling the truth, and seemed
convinced, and almost smiled. Easter knew that something else was
troubling her, and asked what it was.
A tear moistened Queen's eye. "I don't have any nice dresses to wear,"
she said, miserably.
Easter's heart almost broke, and she spent the next few days making a
couple of pretty dresses for Queen, and a smart little pinafore to wear
over them, to keep them clean.
Cap'n Jack was all in favor of the idea. To him, it was not similar to
the situation with Annie, because Queen would still be with them. What
was paramount in his mind was that Queen would now have the advantage of
real learning, for undoubtedly she would go to school with Uzzie's
children, and she would learn to dance, and how to conduct herself in
social situations. She would learn how to become a lady, which was Capn
Jack's immediate dream for her, and she
422 ALEX HALEY'S QUEEN
would be raised in her father's household, which, to him, was her true
station. Tempered by the reality of a slave's existence, he saw Queen taking
her first steps on the path to her true ascendancy, to her true place as her
father's daughter.
So it was that on a warm summer day, Easter took Queen to the main entrance
of the big house. She knew she should have used the back door, but if her
daughter was to be taken in by this family, then it 'would be done
properly. Queen was neatly dressed and was wearing her new pinafore. Easter
carried a small bag with the girl's other few belongings. She rang the
bell.
Still, Easter had a heavy heart, and she wondered what Queen was thinking.
Queen had been excited all morning, and very nervous, but hadn't said very
much. As they waited for a response to the bell, Queen seemed to be mulling
something over in her mind, and then she looked at her mother.
"Why the Massa come see you all the time?" she asked. Like he was my pappy."
Easter knew that Queen must learn the truth of her parentage one day, that
the other slaves would make sure of it, if they hadn't hinted at it
already. Even so, it was difficult territory. For both of them.
" Hush up 'bout yo' pappy, yo' hear, or I take a switch to you," she said,
and the words were fiercer than her tone. "Yo' pappy ain't here, an' that's
all there is about it!"
Then she relented, for at that moment she didn't want Queen to have a
pappy, not even Jass. She wanted her all for herself. She hugged her
daughter.
.' Jus' remember yo' got a mammy that love yo," she said tenderly. But she
had to prepare her for the future.
"And a Massa that love yo'. Jus' like he was yo' pappy."
Parson Dick opened the door and was surprised to see them, but understood
why Easter had not gone round the back. He almost smiled in sympathy, and
led them into the hall, telling them to wait while he fetched the Missy.
They were an odd couple, the two of them, and looked shabby, the
half-caste, dowdily dressed woman and her tiny daughter, standing nervously
in the grand hall with its chandeliers and sweeping staircase and somber
portraits of all the Jackson family. The sheer magnificence frightened
Queen and
MERGING 423
brought home the truth of her situation to her. She would never be able
to imagine this as her "new home" as Mammy had told her it would be. She'd
never be able to run laughing down those stairs, or pad across that
polished floor in bare, muddy feet, as she did at her old home. She
clutched her mammy's hand tightly. -
Lizzie came down the stairs, almost as nervous as they. She was
especially irritated that Easter had used the front door, but had few
ways of venting her displeasure, for who knew what the woman would tell
Jass, and Jass was so adamant about this whole wretched business that
Lizzie was not prepared to cross him. Nor was she about to lose the
confrontation.
"You should have used the back door," she said sharply.
She stared at her rival, never having studied her before. Easter had
always been a vague and shadowy figure to her before she learned the
truth of Jass's affections, and since then Lizzie had scarcely been able
to look at her.
Now she did, because she had to, and because she could. She could not
imagine what Jass saw in her. The woman had a certain thick-lipped
prettiness about her but almost went out of her way to make the worst of
herself, in that plain dress and dreadful scarf. "Mammy," Lizzie thought,
"a regular nigra mammy," and wondered what it was that made her so
desirable to her husband. Easter's disregard of her own beauty was almost
painful to Lizzie, who took such care about her appearance, and her
careless physical grace made even Lizzie understand something of the
processes of physical desire. To save herself, she mentally dismissed
Easter as an immoral slut who had some secret, sexual hold over Jass that
Lizzie would never understand.
Then there was the child. A scrawny midget of a thing, with no
personality, staring at the floor and trying to hide in the folds of her
mammy's dress.
And white as cotton.
"You may go," Lizzie said to Easter.
Easter didn't go. She put her arm around Queen.
"I still see her, Missy?" she begged in a plaintive voice that gave
Lizzie, for the moment at least, all the power over this woman for which
she longed.
"Of course you will. This is another house, not another
424 ALEX HALEY'S QUEEN
country," Lizzie said, without any trace of kindness. "But you should know-"
She could not resist. She had to turn the situation to her advantage.
--this is the Massa's decision. I do not approve of it." She would show
this woman who was Mistress. "But since it is to be, the child will be
given every advantage. She will be trained as a lady's maid, with all the
necessary etiquette. So be careful when you see her. I do not want her
learning your nigra ways."
It had a different effect from that which Lizzie intended. The slave seemed
to draw comfort from Lizzie's words. It was the Massa's decision, about the
Massa's child, and it was Easter who had power over the Massa. Obviously,
Lizzie did not want it to happen, but there was nothing she could do to
stop it.
" I only wants the best for her," she said, and Lizzie, to her horror,
thought Easter was smiling.
"What you want has nothing to do with it," she snapped. "We own her!"
She let that sink in for a moment, and was then tired of it all. "Say
good-bye to her and go."
Easter knelt, hugged Queen to her, and whispered in the child's ear.
" Yo' be a good girl, like I teached yo', and do what you tole, allus. Jus'
like yo' had a new mammy-"
Lizzie turned on her in fury. "I am her Mistress," she said. "Not her
marnmy! "
It frightened Queen, who clung close to Easter.
"Come along, Queen."
Queen didn't want to go, she didn't like Miss Lizzie, but her mammy kissed
her, gave her the little bag, and pushed her forward.
'Queen!" Lizzie commanded again.
'Go with her," Easter whispered.
Reluctantly, Queen moved forward. Lizzie was already climbing the enormous
staircase. Head down, Queen followed her up, her tiny legs only able to
take one step at a time. She looked up a couple of times to see where she
was going, and all those grim people in all the pictures on the wall stared
MERGING 425
down at her, ready, Queen was sure, to have her whipped if she did
anything wrong.
Once, she looked back. Her mammy was still standing in the hall, and
Queen knew she was crying. She wanted with all her heart to run back down
and hug her mammy, tell her not to cry, and go home with her to the
weaving house, and wake up from this nightmare.
But she had to do what her mammy and the Massa and her gran'pappy and
everyone she knew told her she must.
"Queen!" she heard Miss Lizzie shout, angrily.
"Queen," she heard her mammy whisper.
Queen was determined not to cry.
PART THREE
QUEEN
Not they who soar, but they who plod Their rugged way, unhelped, to God
Are heroes; they who higherfare, And,flying,fan the upper air, Miss all
the toil that hugs the sod. 'Tis they whose backs haveftit the rod, Whose
fiet have pressed the path unshod, May smile upon def~ated care, Not they
who soar.
-PAUL LAURFNCE DUNBAR
51
d . iQueen!"
She heard William calling her again, but didn't respond, because he'd
called several times, and she couldn't decide which bonnet to wear. She
had only two, her dark-gray one for best and Sundays, and a blue one for
other times. Today was not Sunday, but she was wearing her Sunday best
dress and should have worn her gray bonnet, but she wanted to wear her
blue one because it looked nicer. It was a little shabby, however, from
constant use, and she hemmed and hawed and changed her mind, and her
bonnet, a dozen times, while William, who had been ready half an hour
earlier, had gone on ahead. Queen knew they were all waiting for her, but
today was a big day. They were going to visit Missy Becky at The Sinks,
which was a frequent event, and then they were going into town, which was
not, and she wanted to look really pretty.
She settled on the blue bonnet, grabbed her gloves and almost empty