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  CHAPTER VII.

  Lycoris, the fair Gaul, was giving a splendid entertainment. ValeriusMartialis, the greatest wit of the city of the Seven Hills, hadrecited his newest and most poignant epigrams with loud applause, andthe company--more than a hundred persons--were reclining at supperon cushioned divans in the lavishly-decorated eating-room. The youngMassilian lady presided. With her neck and shoulders half-veiled intransparent gauze[153] from Cos, her magnificent golden-yellow hairknotted up at the back of her head and wreathed simply with ivy, shesmiled radiantly from the head of the table, the object of silentworship to many, and of eager admiration to all. A number of slaves,in handsome Alexandrian dresses, moved quickly and silently about thehandsome hall, while across the supper table the conversation eachinstant grew more lively.

  Among the guests was Caius Aurelius, the young Batavian. He had yieldedto the pressure of curiosity or of fashion--particularly when the nameof the famous epigrammatist had weighed down the scale.

  "Really," he was saying to his neighbor Norbanus--the commandant ofthe Praetorian guard--"really, Norbanus, till this hour I had esteemedmyself rich, but here I feel by comparison a beggar. What splendor,what lavish outlay! Pillars of alabaster, enormous gold plates,[154]carpets worth an estate--my senses reel. Everything which elsewherewould appear rare and choice is here in every day use. By Hermes! butthe father of Lycoris must have been a favorite of fortune."

  "Not so loud!" interrupted Lucius Norbanus. "See, Stephanus is lookingthis way with a meaning glance."

  "Stephanus![155] The Empress's steward? What has he to do with Lycoris?"

  "Ha! well, I will tell you that another time," said the officer fillinghis mouth with a fine oyster,[156] "between ourselves, you know.Meanwhile, I strongly advise you to taste those delicious mollusks. Ifyou are like me, laughing has made you ferociously hungry."

  "You certainly laughed most heartily," replied Aurelius accepting someof the praised dish from a slave; "but I, for my part, cannot get upany taste for this kind of verse. Martial is full of wit and humor,but this perpetual mockery, this making a business of holding up allsociety to ridicule and contempt--no, my dear Norbanus, I cannotlike it. More particularly does the way in which he speaks of womendisplease and vex me. If he is to be believed, there is not in all Romeone faithful wife, or one innocent girl."[157]

  "Pah!" said Norbanus, with his mouth well filled: "There are some ofcourse, but they are scarce, my dear Aurelius, remarkably scarce."

  "What is amusing you so much, Norbanus?" asked Quintus from his placeopposite.

  "The old theme--women! Aurelius thinks, that our laurel-wreathedpoet has sinned basely against the ladies of Rome, by hinting in hisepigrams his doubts of their virtue."

  "Who? What?" cried the poet himself, hastily looking round. "WhatRavidus[158] is here, to take up the cudgels against my iambics?"

  This quotation from Catullus, the favorite poet and model of theepigrammatist, did not fail of its point, for every one, with thesingle exception of the blushing Aurelius, was reminded by it thatRavidus was, in that passage, called a "crazed and witless wretch."

  "It was I," said Aurelius coolly. "But it was not your verse that Icriticised, but ... however, you heard. If a woman is no more to youthan the beetle, the snake that wriggles in the dust, I can but pityyour experience."

  "Yours then has been more fortunate?" laughed Martial.

  "I should hope so, indeed!"

  Lycoris, who, though at some distance, must have heard every word,was chatting vehemently with Stephanus, her neighbor on her left, whokept his gaze alert, though with an air of reserve and dignity. Twoof her companions, pretty but by no means maidenly personages, staredcontemptuously at Aurelius as if to say: "Well, what a booby!"

  "Here is to your health, worthy Cato of the North!" cried Martialmockingly. "Reveal his name to me, O Muse! and I will dedicate to youfive and twenty epigrams on his virtue."

  "He has a sharp muzzle," muttered Norbanus to Aurelius. "You will getthe worst of it."

  "No doubt of that," said Aurelius. "Fencing with words was never mystrong ground."

  "Just my case; and I cannot stand his accursed ribaldry. These fellowsare like eels, it is impossible to hold them. It is the city tone, mydear friend! Our Stephanus now--only see how the man is made up--now,full in the light. By Castor! he is touched up and painted like awench--Stephanus again, is a master in the war of words. But he givesyou a pebble for a gem; everything about him is false, even his hair.But beware of him; he will try to make mince-meat of you."

  "I say, Martial," said a harsh voice: "Who is going to publish theepigrams you gave us to-day?"

  "I do not yet know. Possibly Tryphon."[159]

  "And when, my friend?"

  "Well, in the course of the month."

  "So soon? Listen, when the book comes out, may I send to you to borrowa copy?"

  "You are too kind, my dear Lupercus; but why should you give yourselfand a slave so much trouble? I live quite high up on the Quirinal.[160]You can get what you want much nearer to you. You pass every day bythe Argiletum. There you will find a very interesting shop, exactlyopposite the Forum of Caesar. Atrectus, the bookseller, will feelhimself honored in selecting a beautiful copy for you--almost givenaway too, as I may say, for with purple letters and smoothly pumiced itcosts but five or six denarii."[161]

  "Six denarii!" exclaimed Lupercus. "That is too dear for me. I have tobe saving with my money."

  "And I must be saving with my books."

  "It is not every one, who knows how to be obliging!"

  "Nay, do not give up all hope," retorted the epigrammatist scornfully."Make your wants known at all the street-corners,[162] and perhaps somecostermonger[163] will lend you a copy."

  "Why is Martial so hard upon him?" asked Aurelius of the praetorianguardsman. "This Lupercus seems to be in narrow circumstances."

  "Ha, ha!" laughed Norbanus. "With an income of two hundred thousandsesterces...."

  "Impossible! how can a man be at once so rich and so mean?"

  "You are in Rome, Aurelius--do not forget that you are in Rome. Hereextremes meet; here everything is possible, even the impossible."

  It was now growing dusk, and in a few minutes hundreds of costly bronzelamps were lighted, some hanging in candelabra from the ceiling, someelegantly arranged round the pilasters and columns. Indeed it was nottill this moment, that the banquet really assumed the aspect intendedby the artistic and extravagant imagination of the hostess. Thebeaten silver of the massive bowls[164] and platters gleamed brightlyunder the wreaths of flowers and garlands of foliage, while the hugewine-jars and costly Murrhine vases,[165] the jovial and purpled facesof the guests, the splendid dresses, the pearls and gems--all weredoubly effective under the artificial light.

  One costly delicacy was followed by another; all the productions ofthe remotest ends of the earth met at the banquet of Lycoris. Fishfrom the Atlantic ocean, Muraenae from Lake Lucrinus, Guinea-fowlsfrom Numidia,[166] young kids from the province of Thesprotis[167]in Epirus, pheasants from the Caspian Sea,[168] Egyptian dates,[169]dainty cakes[170] from Picenum, figs from Chios,[171] pistachionuts[172] from Palestine--were all here of the choicest quality andelaborately prepared. Euphemus,[173] Caesar's own head-cook, couldhave done no more. Nor could anything be more perfect, than the gracewith which the handsomely-dressed slaves offered each dainty on longslices of bread. After each dish had gone round, little boys with wingsbrought in magnificent onyx jars filled with perfumed water, which theypoured over the hands of the guests. The long flowing hair of a femaleslave[174] served to dry them, in the place of the more usual linen orasbestos napkin. In such trifles as these Lycoris loved to be original.

  During the meal an intermezzo had now and then interrupted the eagerconversation. Black-haired girls from Gades and Hispalis[175] hadcome in, dancing to the cadence of castanets[176] and cymbals;flute-players, singers and reciters had given highly-applauded evidenceof their talents. But now, whe
n the business of eating was over and the_commissatio_, as it was called, the drinking in short, was about tobegin, as was hinted by the distribution to the guests of fresh wreathsand of perfumed oils, a buffoon or jester[177] made his appearance,and soon filled the hall with Homeric laughter. His small and muscularform was clothed in gaily-colored scraps of raiment, and his face waspainted in strong colors. Entering the room with a hop, skip and jump,he performed a series of somersaults with great skill; then leapinghigh over the guests' heads, actually on to the table, he placedhimself in front of Lycoris and began thus in a high, shrill voice:

  "Highly-esteemed friends of this illustrious house, now that yourempty stomachs are duly replenished your minds too are to be no lessdelightfully satisfied. I offer you the feast of self-knowledge; toeach one of you here I will shortly and plainly tell your fortune. IfI appear to you over-bold, attribute it to the functions of my office;for audacity is my vocation, as it is that of the most honored Martial."

  A storm of applause rang through the banqueting-hall, and Martialhimself even laughed heartily.

  "Capital, capital!" he exclaimed to the little man. "Your beginning isadmirable and promises much," and he stroked his grizzled beard withmuch complacency; the jester bowed and went on with his privilegedimpertinences. He flung some epigrammatic and pointed remark at oneand another of the company, and was each time rewarded by more or lesseager applause. When he came round to the young provincial, he grinnedwith vicious impudence.

  "Oh, noble vestal virgin!" he exclaimed, holding his hand before hisface in affected coyness. "How much a hundred weight does proprietycost in Trajectum?"

  His former jests had been happier and more pointed, but not one hadbeen so readily taken; the company laughed so immoderately, that thebuffoon had some difficulty in making himself heard again. Aurelius,though he was disgusted with the fellow, had discretion and tact enoughnot to draw attention to himself; he laughed and applauded as heartilyas any one. Not so, however, Herodianus, his freedman, who reclinedat the lower end of the table and had given himself up to silent andunlimited enjoyment of the Caecubum.

  "What, you foul-mouthed scoundrel!" he exclaimed in a voice of thunder."Who are you scoffing at? My dear friend Aurelius compared to a woman!Go home, and let your mother teach you manners."

  The company were in so jovial a mood, that they at once turned thisinterference into account. When the Batavian was about to reproveHerodianus, he was talked down, while the indignant freedman wasspurred on by half-ironical appeals and challenges.

  "Let him alone," said the captain of the guard: "He will serve thejester's turn well enough."

  "Aye, that he will!" exclaimed another. "Only look at him knitting hisbrows. Is not he just like the Silenus in Stephanus' dining-hall?"

  "Just be so good as to hold your tongues," cried Quintus, who had beenexcessively amused by Herodianus' pugnacity. "The little man on thetable is going to answer him."

  "Silence for the jester!" shouted a chorus.

  The buffoon stood still with his hand up to his ear.

  "Did I not hear a pug-dog barking?" he said with inimitable comicgravity. "Yes, there he lies, a Maltese pug! Come, Lailaps, come! Hereare Lucanian sausages!"

  Looking impartially at the freedman's face, it was impossible to denythat the resemblance was well hit, but Herodianus could hardly beexpected to take this unprejudiced view of the matter. Forgetting whereand with whom he was, he sprang from his couch, struck his fist on thetable, and shouted out, crimson with rage:

  "Come on, you braggart, if you dare! I will teach you, I will show youthat ... that.... By Hercules! if you do not jump down this minute, youare the most cowardly, contemptible toad under the sun."

  The little man sprang like lightning over Stephanus' head on to thefloor, turned up the sleeves of his particolored shirt and shouted inmockery:

  "Come on, Lailaps, come on! I will give you a thrashing."

  For a moment Herodianus seemed to hesitate; then he suddenly flew atthe jester like the storm of wind suggested by his Greek dog-name.The jester, however, slipped on one side as quick as lightning, andHerodianus, who, indeed, was not very steady on his feet, fell atfull-length on the floor. In an instant the buffoon was sitting astrideon his back.

  "Pug, you are snappish!" he exclaimed in a triumphant tone, and hebegan vigorously to belabor every part of the hapless freedman, that hecould reach with his powerful fists.

  "The dog must be broken!" he exclaimed at each blow. "Quiet, Lailaps,down, my noble cur!"

  Herodianus, who, besides, had in falling damaged his knees and elbows,roared like one possessed; in vain did he try to throw off histormentor. The dwarf clung to him tightly with his legs. The wholescene was as irresistibly comical as though it had been planned for thedelectation of a blase and overwrought party of drinkers. But Aureliuscould no longer contain himself; he rose and went up to the combatantswith well-assumed coolness.

  "You are going too far," he said. "Be off with you, you little rascal."

  The jester paying no heed to these orders, found himself suddenlypicked up by the girdle and with one effort lifted high into the air.His struggles and yells were of no avail; Aurelius carried him likea feather to the table, and there set him down among the cups andwine-jars. The strength and promptness of the proceeding diverted itof any vexatious interference; the dwarf, completely quelled, stoodon the table like a stork that has had its wings cut, looking roundhalf-frightened and half-angry. The young Northman's grip had fairlytaken his breath away, and a sign from Lycoris that he might withdrawwas evidently welcome to him. He vanished between the crowd of slaveslike a startled deer.

  Aurelius had hastened to the rescue of Herodianus, who now, havingbeen helped on his feet by some of the servants, found the greatestdifficulty in keeping on them.

  "Poor fellow!" he said kindly. "But you are really quite incorrigible."

  "Oh, my lord!" groaned Herodianus, "it was only on account of theVestal virgin! I should not have cared about being called a pug! Oh yegods! my knees."

  "I will take you in my litter. My own head aches, till it might split."

  "What! are you going?" said Quintus Claudius, coming up to him. "Doyou not know that Lycoris has planned a magnificent surprise for herguests?"

  "I know it, but I must beg to be excused. These sports are not to mytaste. Farewell till we meet again."

  So speaking, he beckoned his Gothic slave, who took the limpingfreedman round the body and held him up with his usual strength ofarm. The pair went first, and Aurelius followed them. All the companyhad by this time left their places, so his disappearance was almostunremarked; but the fair hostess kept her eye fixed on him, tillshe lost sight of her ungracious guest in the throng. Then, with aninsidious smile, she turned to Quintus, laid her hand on his shoulder,and whispered maliciously: "What sort of foolish philosopher is thatwho comes here, of all places, to plead the cause of women and take upthe cudgels for a freedman?"

  "Your foolish philosopher," replied Quintus, "is one of the noblestsouls I ever knew, and beyond a doubt, the very noblest of the men whocross your threshold."

  "Indeed!" said Lycoris, somewhat abashed. "Well, we shall have timeby and bye to discuss this paragon of merit!" And with a coquettishtoss of her head she turned from Quintus and mingled with the crowd ofguests, who were now streaming out into the illuminated gardens.

  FOOTNOTES:

  [153] TRANSPARENT GAUZE. The island of Cos ([Greek: Kos]) belonging to the Sporades, furnished garments made from a half-transparent silk gauze called _coa_. (See Hor. _Sat._ I. 2, 101.)

  [154] GOLD PLATES. A room has been discovered on the Aventine, whose walls were concealed by gilded bronze plates encrusted with medals; on the Palatine there was an apartment lined with plates of silver, set with precious stones. The halls and chambers in Nero's _domus aurea_ were covered with golden plates.

  [155] STEPHANUS. I have taken considerable liberties in dealing with this perso
nage in his relation to the Empress Domitia. He is, however, historical.

  [156] THE OYSTER, (_ostrea_ or _ostreum_) was considered a great dainty in ancient times. (See note, 42, Vol. 1, "lobster.")

  [157] THERE IS NOT IN ALL ROME ONE FAITHFUL WIFE, OR ONE INNOCENT GIRL. See Martial _Ep._ IV, 71.

  "Long have I search'd, my Soph, the town, To find a damsel that would frown, But not a damsel will deny, As if a shame 't were to be shy; As if a sin, will no one dare: I see not one denying fair. 'Then of the fair is no one chaste?' A thousand, Soph, you urge in haste. 'What does the chaste? Enlarge my views.' She does not grant, nor yet refuse." ELPHINSTON.

  In contrast to the hyperbolical expressions of the satirical writers, we are made acquainted in the letters of the younger Pliny, with a number of women of noble character; the historians too, especially Tacitus, as well as inscriptions on the monuments prove--if proof were required--that even in this corrupt age feminine virtue and loftiness of character were not rare. It is natural, that a satirical author should have special keenness of vision for errors and weaknesses.

  [158] WHAT RAVIDUS?. The poem to which Martial here alludes is found Cat. _Carm._ XL.

  "Quaenam te mala mens, miselle Ravide Agit praecipitem in meos iambos?"

  [159] TRYPHON, (LUPERCUS). The episode described here, which seems almost like a satirical allusion to the present time, is only one of Martial's epigrams transposed into action. (Mart. _Ep._ I, 117.)

  "As oft, Sir Tradewell, as we meet, You're sure to ask me in the street, When you shall send your boy to me, To fetch my book of poetry? etc." OLDHAM.

  The bookseller Atrectus, who had a shop on the Argiletum, a public square not far from the Forum Caesaris, is also mentioned.--Traces of a well-organized book-trade are found towards the end of the republic. The first publisher on a larger scale is Pomponius Atticus, a friend of Cicero, who formally issued a series of Cicero's works, for instance the _Orator_, _Quaestiones Academicae_, etc., and not only distributed them to the different bookstores in Rome, but supplied the numerous shops in Greece and Asia Minor. (See Cic. _ad. Att._ XII, 6, XV, 13, XVI, 5.) Yet Atticus was a patron of literature and an aesthetic, rather than a business man. The best-known booksellers and publishers under the emperors were: the Brothers Sosii, who issued the works of Horatius Flaccus (Hor. _Ep._ I, 20, 2, _Ars. poet._ 345); Dorus, the Phillip Reclam junior of ancient times, who in the reign of Nero introduced cheap popular editions of Livy and Cicero, (Sen. _Benef._ VII, 61) and Martial's publisher, the Tryphon mentioned in this story. (Mart. _Ep._ IV, 72, XIII, 13.) The editions were provided by slaves, who wrote from dictation. The books were delivered in covers, the backs, glued together, being fastened in the hollow of a cylinder, through which ran a revolving stick. The volumes were cut, the edges were dyed sometimes black and sometimes purple. (See Goell: "_Book-trade of the Greeks and Romans_," Schleiz., 1865.) Pollio Valerianus published Martial's early poems. (Mart. _Ep._ I, 113, 5.)

  [160] QUIRINAL. Martial's house was near the temple on the Quirinal. (Mart. _Ep._ X, 58.)

  [161] DENARII. At the time of Domitian, the denarius (10 _as_,) was worth about 15 cents.

  [162] STREET-CORNERS. Large square tablets, whitened, for the display of public notices, stood at the corners of the streets. A tablet of this description was called album, (albus-white).

  [163] COSTERMONGER. Boiled chick-peas were publicly carried about for sale. (Martial _Ep._ I, 41, I, 103.)

  [164] MASSIVE BOWLS. The crater (_crater_ or _cratera_) was a large vase or bowl, in which strong wine was mixed with water. A ladle was used to fill the drinking-cups.

  [165] MURRHINE VASES, (_murrhina vasa_). Vases made of _murrha_, a material with a pale sheen in it, highly valued by the ancients; probably fluor-spar.

  [166] GUINEA-FOWLS FROM NUMIDIA, (_aves Numidicae_ or merely _Numidicae_) were a favorite dish. (Plin., _Hist. Nat._ Mart. etc.)

  [167] THE PROVINCE OF THESPROTIS in Epirus, extended from Chaonia to the Ambracian Gulf. The goats raised there were considered exceptionally good.

  [168] PHEASANTS FROM THE CASPIAN SEA. At the time of our story, these birds were a newly-introduced delicacy. Phasis was the name of the boundary river between Asia-Minor and Colchis; hence their name _phasianus_; (_avis Phasiana_, or merely _Phasiana_, or _Phasianus_--the pheasant.) Martial also calls them _volucres Phasides_.

  [169] DATES. The best quality were imported into Rome from Egypt.

  [170] DAINTY CAKES. Bread from Picenum is mentioned in the _menu_ of a banquet given in the latter half of the century B. C., (Marquardt Handbuch, IV, 1.)

  [171] FIGS FROM CHIOS. Varro, (_R. Rust._ I, 41) speaks of Chian, Lydian, Chalcedonian and African figs.

  [172] PISTACHIO NUTS. The best pistachio nuts came from Palestine and Syria, whence Lucius Vitellius introduced them into his garden at Albanum.

  [173] EUPHEMUS. Caesar's head-cook or butler. (See Martial _Ep._ IV. 8.)

  "The tenth hour's proper for my book and me, And Euphem, thou who dost the board o'ersee." ANON, 1695.

  [174] THE LONG FLOWING HAIR OF A FEMALE SLAVE. This fancy was not at all unusual. (See _Petron._, 27.)

  [175] HISPALIS. A city in southern Spain, now Seville.

  [176] CASTANETS. Castanet dances are often represented in pictures. (See O. Jahn, Fresco-paintings on the walls of the columbarium, in the Villa Pamfili.)

  [177] JESTER. Jesters, especially dwarfs, were very popular in ancient Rome. The scene that follows here is based upon various incidents in a description by Lucian, which has come down to modern times: "The Banquet, or The Lapithae" 18, 19. In this a hideous little fellow, who gives utterance to all sorts of jests and witticisms, appears at Aristaenetus' banquet. "Finally he addressed each person with some mischievous joke--and each laughed as his turn came. But when he accosted Alcidamas, calling him a Maltese puppy, the latter, especially as he had long been jealous of the applause and attention bestowed on the jester by the whole company, grew angry, threw off his cloak and challenged the dwarf to a boxing-match. What could the poor jester do? It was infinitely comical to see a philosopher fight with a clown. Many of the spectators were ashamed of the scene, but others laughed merrily, until Alcidamas was at last beaten black and blue."