Tate shrugged. “I’ve been meaning to tell you... I can’t be here tomorrow, but your trainer is ready to start your training whenever you are.”
I’d been mid-sip and swallowed all wrong, if by swallow I meant snorted water and bubbles out my nose. I wiped at my face, looking and feeling the fool. “Right. My trainer. Who is he?”
He shook his head and said, “I can’t tell you that.”
I about poured the drink over his head. A horrible fizzle snapped and popped in my chest. “Why not?”
“I made a deal.”
“With who? Foster?” No how, no way. I did not uproot my entire life, have the falling out of my life, and move to the mansion of sin to be manipulated by Foster Bennett. “I’m out of here.”
I swiveled on my heel, but Tate grabbed my arm. Desperation leeched into his words. “No, no, not that kind of deal. Listen. Foster is lending me some of his staff and some money to invest in this place, get it making money again, build up the clientele. I’ve only got thirty days to show a profit or he pulls out. So much work to do. I made a deal with this... guy to train you, but that was his requirement. He didn’t want his identity interfering with your training.”
No way, no how. It had been a long time since I’d been a doormat and I was never going back. “A, I’m not getting down and dirty with a Dominant I’ve never met before, and A plus, you should have damn well told me about this deal.”
He took my hand, brought it to his lips and lingered, then looked up at me with forgive-me sultry eyes. “I was afraid you’d react, well, like this.”
Sigh. While I would not give in to Tate’s charms, I had every intention of getting this training so I could finally open my own damn club. “Who the fuck is this person you want me to train with? Is he or she even here tonight?”
He grinned. “He is, but he doesn’t want you to meet him yet. He prefers to remain anonymous to everyone. He even wears a full mask.”
Nope. Trust landed smack dab at number one on the list of qualities in a power exchange relationship, and training was in and of itself filled with that kind of give and take. “I don’t think so.”
I stomped off in my best impression of an irritated princess. On my way past Lilly, I snagged a long leather paddle out of some dumbass’s hand and smacked it right across her ass hard enough to leave an imprint of the hearts sewn into the leather. I could practically feel the return of her dagger eyes hitting me in the back on my way out. I didn’t give a damn.
I beat the floors all the way up the grand staircase and hoped I sounded like a heard of elephants to the partygoers below. Either Tate would follow me, and we’d figure some other arrangement out or I’d go to plan B. Or plan C, or I might be on plan J or K by now. But somehow, someway I would learn the arts of domination and open my own club.
The mood I was in that club would be the epitome of sugar and spice.
Devils and Angels.
Coño, I was tired. There were two bedrooms on each side of the large center hallway. All four doors were shut. One had to be Tate’s room and I fully admitted to being nosy enough to want to see what his own private sanctuary was like.
I opened the first door on the left and found a bland guest room done in leather furniture, dark wood and painted sage green. No way Tate spent time in there. The second door on the left was similar, only painted in a cornflower blue. These were obviously for my guys.
That meant Tate had put me next to him. The first door across the hall I hit the jackpot. A canopy bed, minus the canopy, but instead, mirrors, various hooks and other metal fixtures that could be for nothing other than some serious rope play.
Instead of wall art, a whole display of paddles hung over the head of the bed, and instead of dressers or bedside tables, they were two cupboards with glass doors filled with sex toys galore, instruments of pleasure and pain, and a lifetime supply of lube. Mmm, cherry almond, cupcake, and even maple bacon flavored. Quite the smorgasbord.
I nosed around for a few minutes. I didn’t want to get caught sniffing, aka tasting, my way around Tate’s room. I yawned and stretched. Nothing sounded better than to crash into a soft bed, forget ninety percent of this day ever happened, and try again tomorrow.
The last door in the hall opened to a strange sight. I hadn’t known what to expect after seeing Tate’s room, but not this. The room was an almost exact duplicate of my bedroom in the townhouse back home.
I wasn’t sure if this was creepy or caring in its amazing attention to detail.
The walls were a sumptuous caramel color, the silk bedspread, the palest of pinks, even the prints on the wall were museum quality prints of the artwork I owned. The door to the walk-in closet was open and I could see the clothes I’d brought hanging. Even my phone and tablet were plugged in and on the nightstand. If my favorite vibrator was in the drawer, I’d see if I could find my way out of this Twilight Zone, because that would be a little creepy.
I yanked the drawer open. A few of my favorite curvy girl romance novels were in there, but no vibrator. Phew.
Still, this room was both completely comfortable and totally weird, and I’d think about it tomorrow with a rested mind. I plopped down on the bed, kicked off my heels and tried to drift off. In my mind, I’d fall asleep instantly, not even stirring until the next morning. The reality was my brain still went a million miles a minute, even as tired as I was, sleep was far off for me.
An orgasm would go a long way toward relaxing me, but for the first time since I took the step into this new sexual role I simply didn’t feel like it. I didn’t want to play, I didn’t want the guys in my bed, and I didn’t even want to masturbate. That was damn sad.
I rolled over and grabbed my tablet. A quick check to see if I had any email, then maybe play some Bejeweled to quiet my mind.
Cade had sent an email and I replied to let him know we’d arrived safe and sound. I deleted the email from my father without even reading it. I paged through a few newsletters I’d subscribed to and some notices from Facebook. And an email from Gray.
Cojeme. I couldn’t catch a damn break today. My finger hovered over the delete button. He’d been on my mind for the past eleventy-hundred hours. I’d even hallucinated that I smelled him here in Texas. Why did I do this to myself?
Somehow, while eyerolling myself, I clicked on the email and opened it. I sure as shit meant to hit delete.
Angel,
What a beautiful disaster we are. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve kicked my own ass during a sleepless night that I could have had you in my arms.
I’ve rewritten this damn line a half-dozen times trying to explain, to rationalize, to make you understand why I left. But those false starts show me again what a stupid, irrational, and angry mistake I made.
Now, I fear I’ve lost you for good.
I tried to catch your plane before you left this morning, but the universe was against me at every move and every god-damned red light. It must be my punishment to have to wait that much longer to be with you again.
I didn’t think you’d take my call, instead, I’m sending this note so you get it when you arrive in Texas, and so you know I’m thinking of you, I want you.
And what a fool I am. An utter fool.
Forgive me.
—Gray
Umm. Mierda.
I mean... really... what the fuck? He’s sorry? Now?
What. The. Actual. Fuck.
Like I’m supposed to be all pickled tink he wants me back. Am I supposed to let him into my life again?
No way.
My heart beat so hard in my chest that I started sweating. I could feel each tiny shred that Gray left it in pulsing and vibrating.
My hands shook and if I didn’t move, I’d throw up, or have a stroke, or write back.
Bad idea.
The room was plenty big enough to pace in, and I patrolled one end to the other cursing Gray with each footstep. What if he came down here? What if he was already here and at the Ranch? That had to be w
hy I thought I smelled him earlier tonight.
I could hurricane my way back down to the party and bluster and blow until he showed his face. Or I could hole up here in my new bedroom and make him wait.
Oh, yes. I was officially changing my name to Mistress Make-‘em-wait. Bastard.
CHAPTER NINE
Sub before Domme
I decided not to appear the next day until late into the evening. Dominic and Ilario took turns bringing me food, doing a few errands, and guarding the door. I didn’t tell them about my Gray theory. In fact, I didn’t want them knowing anything in case they were in on it with him. It wouldn’t be the first time Gray had them under his influence.
If Gray was here, he could whimper at my feet with the rest of them.
Today, nobody went in or out of my room without my say-so. And that included Tate and the anonymous Dom he wanted to train me.
I’d show them. I didn’t need AnonoDom’s training. Okay. I did. Still, he was going to wait until I was good and ready.
I took a nice long bath, lotioned up, and had an esthetician brought in to touch up my nails and do a little grooming down there. What was money for if not to have people at my beck and call?
I spent a good deal of time sorting through my frilly and not so frilly clothes. Several black leather items waited on the bed for trying on. Tonight’s outfit had to be precisely right. Hide the bits I didn’t like and show all the curves I’d learned to love.
At seven o’clock Tate came pounding on the door. “Angelina, I don’t know what you’ve been doing in there all day, but if you’re pouting, neither I nor your Dom are happy waiting. I’ve postponed my departure all damn day for you.”
“Fuck you, Tate,” I sang back.
“Ange, stop pouting and come down to the club before we both get our asses beat.”
I spritzed one last squirt of shimmery body spray on my chest, hoisted the girls in the tight corset, and opened the stupid door.
“Whoa.” Tate stepped back and gawked at me, open mouthed.
“Not what you were expecting?” I sauntered past him in my shiny, black, tall, boots. My outfit was perfectly cliché, black patent leather lace-up high-heeled boots, a stretchy lace skirt that rode the tops of my thighs, and a black corset that laced up the front and the back.
Damn, I looked hawt in it. I carried a riding crop and tapped my boots as I walked down the hall. “And don’t call me Ange. I hate that nickname.”
Tate followed on my heels like a love-sick pup and my guys were right behind.
Ilario sidled up to me and wrapped an arm around my waist. “Mistress, you look luscious in your Dominatrix clothes. Please say you will command me to your will tonight.”
“Oh, I aim to have some fun tonight.”
He might have whispered “yippee” under his breath, but I wasn’t sure. We were overdue for some erotic play.
Stress release for them, and I planned to show this anonymous Dom I knew a thing or two. Or three.
Coño. I did need his training, but I didn’t like this whole secretive thing. From the second I hit the tarmac I was out of the loop. Tate didn’t tell me about any of this, and I wasn’t standing for it. That certainly didn’t fit with my whole I’m-a-Dominatrix identity.
A Domme didn’t get told what to do, or who to do. She told. I was going to tell them all where they could shove it, and it wouldn’t be anywhere near me. Ha.
If I pulled this off, I’d get my training off on the right foot. My foot. If it didn’t go well, then, fuck ‘em. I’d started over once, twice. The third time might be the charm.
In a dark secret place in the far back of my mind, I really wanted this to work. I didn’t want to try, try again. I wasn’t admitting that to anyone, including myself.
Shut-up dark secret corner of my mind.
When we got to the bottom of the stairs Tate stopped me. “I have to go, but your Dom is waiting for you.”
I nodded and he kissed me on both cheeks. “For luck.”
Then he hurried through a door that led toward the back entrance. It almost felt like he was running away. Such a strange man. Hot. But weird.
I pulled in one bracing breath before facing the onslaught. I could hear the low din of voices in laughter and soft, sensual moans. The club awaited.
Here we go.
I rounded the corner and sauntered, or maybe it was sashayed—yes, I definitely sashayed my way into the room. Most faces turned to check me out. I was happily an eyeful, and I basked in the wanted attention.
Everywhere I looked were beautiful faces, half or completely naked men and women, but no man wearing a mask, and no Grayson. I searched the room, waved at a few of the members I’d met the night before and ran smack into a familiar hot bod.
“Angelina, babe.”
Ooh, familiar black hair and blue eyes. My very favorite black Irish lover. “Hawk? What are you doing here?”
He threw his arm around my shoulder and tucked me into his side. “Like you don’t know.”
Hawk was half the reason I was here at all. He’d been intimately involved into my initiation into kink a few months ago. But I hadn’t seen him since. Which was Gray’s doing. “Am I supposed to?”
Hawk’s arm drifted down off my shoulders and squeezed my ass. “You invited me down.”
I did? What the hell? Hmm. “Well, yes. Of course, I did. I thought you might like this scene and I could use a friendly face.”
We’d been shockingly close a few months ago. Like, ménage a trois close.
“I’d like to be a whole lot more than friendly to your face.” He chucked me under the chin.
I grinned and removed his handsy self from my body. “I’m afraid those days are over. Now you’ll get to use your face to be friendly to me.”
“Oh, I see. The new and improved Angelina. One night with me and you’re a whole new woman. It’s happened before. It’ll happen again.”
I shook my head and laughed. “You’re a dick.”
He leaned in and whispered. “Yeah, a nice big one.”
Hashtag true story.
Hawk glanced around the room. I’m sure trying to pretend he was checking out the scene. I’d bet half my fortune that Hawk was a member of The Asylum too. Was he looking for whoever asked him to come down to the club or here to spy? Nope, I saw a linger, and I knew exactly why he was here, and who he lusted after. “See anything or anyone you like?”
“Eh.” He shrugged.
Liar, liar, P. O. F. “Hmm. I know someone who will interest you. I’m not sure you’ll get along, but she’d be a stimulating challenge for you.”
He crossed his arms, thumb out, tapping on the material of his jacket, but there was interest there. “I’m not sure I like the sound of that.”
“Sure you do. Come on. I’ll introduce you.” I turned on my heel and headed straight for Lilly. The tightening of her stance and the flush on her neck for that lusty aura pouring off Hawk showed she knew we were coming for her.
“You haven’t seen Grayson around, have you?” I asked as we made our way to Lilly.
“Huh? Oh, no. Is he here?” His view never left Lilly for a second, so I couldn’t tell if he was lying or simply not paying attention to me.
I decided not to answer the question. Hawk didn’t seem to notice anyway, he was too busy drooling.
No one else was partaking in the delights Lilly offered at the moment. Hawk’s hands nearly vibrated waiting to smack her lush bottom. I knew that from personal experience.
“Hawk, meet Lilly. She’s a sub of the club, on loan from The Asylum and thus available for any and all the members to partake of as they please.”
Lilly stiffened and opened her mouth, but snapped it back shut without saying a word.
“Within her limits, of course. I’m sure the two of you can work that out.” While I enjoyed seeing Lilly slightly uncomfortable, I’d never let anyone cross the line with her, or any woman, if I could help it. I knew Lilly’s lines were pretty far into the kink
osphere since she’d not only agreed to be a sub for The Red Ranch, but subbed for Foster Bennett.
“I’m sure we will.” Hawk circled her, examining her from head to toe.
I wouldn’t mind seeing how this played out, and fully intended to indulge some of my own voyeurism by staying and watching for a while. Lilly’s pedestal gave me a good vantage point to people watch, and by that I meant look for Gray.
My fun was interrupted by the sense that someone was watching me. The little hairs on my arms stood on end and my skin heated up.
“She is exquisite, isn’t she?” A voice, rough and graveled, injured even, came from behind me. Who was this guy, Batman?
That woodsy Grayson scent washed over me, and I wanted to melt into a puddle on the floor. No. I would not be that girl. Gray was an important part of my past, but he wasn’t here, and I wouldn’t let my senses lie to me and make me think that he was.
I moved to face the voice I guessed was my anonymous Dom. He blocked me with a hand on the back of my shoulder. “Don’t turn around, just watch. I want to see your reactions.”
“What if I want to see your reactions?” I didn’t care a whit about how much he liked watching the unconventional mating ritual between Hawk and Lilly, I wanted to see who I was dealing with.
“My reactions aren’t important right now. I’ve watched you, both last night and tonight. You want to be in charge but aren’t entirely sure how to do that.” His lips touched my ear and he whispered, “Let me help you.”
Quivers worked their way down my neck. Naughty quivers. I didn’t want to be turned on by this guy. He hit a little too close to home for someone I’d never actually met. “How is you watching me be a voyeur going to help?”
His mouth dipped and the lightest of kisses brushed my skin. “If I’m going to train you, I need to get inside your head.”
Huh. Not what I expected. “Not my body?”
He moved away and for some reason I missed the heat of him behind me. Which was particularly weird because I didn’t know him, I wasn’t lusting after him, I swear. He gave me no comfort. In fact, I didn’t even like him.