“Fourthly,” I said, “flying, which I can do because I have really cool wings.”
“Sorry to break this to you, Princess, but unlike dragons, most demons actually can’t fly.” I deflated a little. “Most demons isn’t all demons. I could be one that can.”
“Baby steps. The potential of taking flight will not be our first lesson.”
“You read all this in books?”
He shrugged. “I’ve lived around demons all my life. I’ve observed what they can do. But, yeah, I’ve been reading a lot the last couple of weeks. King Desmond has a lot of books in the castle library I can read whenever I like.”
Maybe I’d been too hard on my father where Michael was concerned. From him getting to spend time in this beautiful courtyard, having the pick of anything from the library to gain knowledge, and my father’s concern about Michael’s current well-being and state of mind, it wasn’t as if he was a slave who spent most of his time chained up in the dungeon.
And if my father really thought there was a problem with Michael’s inner darkness, then that would be a very good justification not to let him travel between worlds.
There were two sides to every story. Sometimes it was difficult to see both right away.
“So, you can shift form now,” Michael said as he crossed his arms.
I tensed. “Just like that? You think it’s that easy, do you?”
“I know it’s normally happened when you’ve felt a surge of emotion—panic, fear, anger. But I think you can do it whenever you like. Thus, the practicing. And remember that if you concentrate on your dragon’s tear bracelet it will help focus your energy.” I couldn’t help but smile at him. “You’re kind of a natural at this instructor thing.”
“You think?”
I nodded. “I feel inspired to give it a shot, even knowing that it’s going to hurt like hell to change back.”
His brows drew together as if he was disturbed at the thought of me being in pain. “I’ve asked the other demon servants here in the castle if shifting form hurts and they said it only did in the beginning.”
I’d been watching him carefully ever since I came out here, and I couldn’t see any sign that he was any different than he’d ever been before. I wasn’t ready yet to relax, though. I needed to find out the truth. I took a couple steps closer to him. “How are you feeling, Michael?” He looked at me curiously. “Feeling?”
I shielded my eyes from the fake brightness out here. “We haven’t had any time to talk about what happened. With...Jonas.” I wasn’t going to tell him what my father feared or what he’d asked me to do, but there was no reason for me not to approach this problem head-on. It might save us all some valuable time.
He shook his head. “I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
“You don’t?” That was troubling. I dug my toe into the grass. “Why not?”
“Because you haven’t shifted form yet.” He gave me a sly smile. “You do something for me and I might feel a bit more talkative.”
“That’s not fair.”
He shrugged. “I’m the coach here. My rules.”
“I think you’re enjoying this a bit too much.”
“And you, Princess, are trying to delay.”
“Fine.” I shut my eyes and tried to concentrate on shifting form without being angry or scared first. I did this for about five minutes and nothing interesting happened. I opened one eye.
Michael raised an eyebrow. “Tick tock, Princess.”
“I know! I’m trying, okay?” I glared at him, then I squeezed my eyes shut again and tried harder. I inhaled the scent of green grass and flowers—and the distractingly amazing one of Michael himself—as I summoned that part of me that was very new, but also very familiar.
Come on, I can do this. It doesn’t control me, I control it.
I felt a burning and tingling on the side of my head. And then a single pop.
“Well done,” Michael said. “That’s one horn. Only one horn. Keep going.” I clenched my fists. I didn’t want to be stuck with only one horn. I would look like a lopsided unicorn, and that would be very embarrassing.
I concentrated even harder this time, focusing all of my energy and trying to summon my Darkling powers until I felt a pop on the other side of my head. The energy crackled through me and the more I focused on the dragon’s tear, the easier it was. I felt my body begin to change—
but the changing was never the hard part. It was the changing back that hurt the most.
I was used to hearing my shirt or coat rip when my wings sliced through them. Today that wouldn’t be a problem.
I opened my eyes. “Well?”
Michael swept his appreciative gaze over me, which made my skin warm wherever he looked.
“Good job. I think you can eventually get that down to a few seconds total.” Had to say, I felt good in this form—once I got here. Strong and powerful in every way. I held my hands out in front of me to see that my normally short, pink-polished nails were now long, black, lethal-looking talons. I reached up to touch my small spiral horns protruding from either side of my head. My blond hair had changed to become longer and a bright, fiery red. And, with a bit more concentration, I was able to stretch out my black wings to either side of me like previously unknown limbs. I took a moment to focus on my tail now extending from the left leg of my shorts, a long thin appendage that ended in what looked like an arrowhead. After a moment, it swished.
My tail swished! Cool!
I looked at Michael with a big grin that would show off my small, sharp canines, like what you’d expect a vampire might have. “Okay, I shifted form just like you asked me to. Now answer my question. How are you feeling after what happened to Jonas?” His gaze snapped to mine. “Fine.”
“Just fine? You don’t feel any different? I mean, that was the first person you ever killed, right?”
“He was trying to kill you. I had to protect you. And I’d do it again in a heartbeat.”
“And I’m grateful. Really.” My voice softened a little. “But I know he was the first Shadow you ever met. It would have been great if he hadn’t been a power-hungry jerk and you could have learned things from him. That must hurt.”
His expression hardened. “It does.”
I wanted answers, but I wasn’t totally heartless. I hated that he was in any kind of pain. “Is there more information you can find? About what you are?”
“We should get back to our lesson.”
“You killed the only person who could tell you more about what you are and you’re trying to tell me you’re fine with that?” I pressed. “Like it means nothing to you? Come on, talk to me. I want to know.”
He frowned at me, but then his eyes narrowed. “Wait a minute, I think I get it. This form makes you act different than normal. I hadn’t really noticed it the other times.” My little secret was out, but I didn’t mind. “I guess I say whatever’s on my mind in this form.
It’s like a layer of weakness and uncertainty peels back. Maybe I’d like to be like this all the time.”
“Might be dangerous.”
“Oh?” I regarded him with interest. “Dangerous how?”
“Depends who you’re talking to. Who you’re pushing.”
I put my hands on my hips. “Will that somebody push back? Will they say what’s on their mind without hiding anything?”
“Maybe. So go ahead and push me as much as you want to. I can push back too.” My wings stretched out further so I could see them out of the corners of my eyes. I gave him a wicked grin. “You know, I am stronger than you in this form. Maybe I can push harder.” He raised an eyebrow. “Don’t be so sure about that.”
“I guess we’ll soon find out.”
His serious expression changed to something much more devilish. “I guess we will.”
“You seem a little different right now too,” I observed. “Does my Darkling bring out a new side of you? One ready to challenge me back no matter what, rather than play dutiful s
ervant boy?”
His eyes flashed, but not with pain. More like a sharp edge of interest in this new side of me he’d just discovered. “Sharp tongue, Princess. Sharp as those talons of yours.” I walked a slow circle around him and he turned to keep our eye contact going. “How about you call me Nikki while we’re training?”
“Okay. Then how about you not call me your dutiful servant boy?” I flashed him a mischievous grin of my own. “Don’t act like one and it’s a deal.” Michael’s gaze didn’t flinch away from my own. “Be careful what you wish for, Nikki. You just might get it.”
Sounded very interesting.
“All right, enough talking. Lesson two, strength and speed.” He stepped back a couple of feet from me. I hadn’t realized how close we’d gotten during our exchange—nearly close enough to touch.
“What should I do?” I asked.
“You said you think you’re stronger than me. Let’s find out.” His smile widened. “Hit me, Nikki. Or, at least, try to.”
Chapter 7
I attacked.
Michael deflected me so easily it was like I was about five years old, and I went flailing in the opposite direction.
“You move fast,” I said with surprise once I got my footing again.
He looked at me with amusement. “You have no idea how fast I can move.” Intriguing. I clenched my hand into a fist, feeling the pinch of my talons. Then I lunged at him again, not holding anything back. He ducked and pushed me back a little. I staggered and almost fell over.
“You pushed me!” I gasped.
“How else are you going to learn if I just let you win? However, you should be able to get a punch in. But nothing? I guess you really do need me around to protect you.”
“You haven’t been around,” I growled. “You’ve been a no-show for two weeks. No postcard.
No Christmas gift.”
His grin faded. “You probably would have been disappointed anyway. Can’t afford a faery rose. You’ll have to depend on your other boyfriend for that.” I eyed him. “Are you jealous of Rhys?”
“You’re now juggling the interest of a faery king as well as your dutiful servant boy.” His words were sharp. “Why ever would I be jealous?”
He easily sidestepped my next lunge at him as if he did this every day. If I’d been in human form, I’d probably be out of breath by now.
“I like sarcasm,” I said. “I like honesty even more, so this is good. I want to know how you feel.”
“So do I.” He met my gaze. “So let’s be totally honest with each other.” We moved slowly in a circle as if testing for weaknesses. I wanted to win, to prove that I wasn’t a weak teenage girl with only a fearsome-looking exterior at the moment. That I could protect myself without anyone having to swing in to save me in the nick of time.
“Agreed,” I finally said. “You first. Does Rhys make you jealous?” Michael’s green eyes narrowed. “Insanely jealous. He gets anything he wants and doesn’t have to work at it. He’s a spoiled brat with a bad attitude who doesn’t appreciate what he already has. And, for the record, when I saw you kissing him at that party I wanted to kill him.” He watched me carefully. “So, if you were wondering, my murderous tendencies started way before Jonas.”
I blinked, surprised. That had been one of the many things I’d been wondering about Michael since my chat with my father. “That’s really honest.”
“Your turn. Were you trying to make me jealous with that kiss?” I blanched at the memory. “Of course not. I didn’t even know you were there. I was mortified that you saw that—something totally unplanned and not something I even asked for. Stupid mistletoe.”
He nodded slowly. “So that kiss was unplanned and totally blamed on mistletoe, but...did you like it?”
I forced myself not to look away from him. He wanted honesty. “I didn’t hate it.” His expression tensed. “And how do you feel about him?” I didn’t answer for a moment, but felt my cheeks heat up. “I don’t know. How’s that for an honest answer? I honestly don’t know how I feel about Rhys. He confuses me.”
“Maybe I should still kill him,” Michael growled under his breath.
I winced. “Bad idea.”
“Anything else we should be honest about right now? Let’s see...” Michael’s jaw tightened and his shoulders tensed. “If you’re confused about Rhys, then how do you feel about me after I’ve been nowhere near you for two whole weeks?”
“Also confused.” As uncomfortable as this line of questioning had become, if I wanted to keep Queen Sephina from demanding Michael be sent to the Underworld to be at her mercy, then I needed to keep this going so he’d feel comfortable about giving me the truth about himself in return. “I wanted you to visit me over the holidays and it hurt my feelings that you didn’t seem to care. Did you even try to come see me?”
He didn’t speak for a moment. “I met with resistance. But...I could have fought harder than I did.”
My wings twitched. I wanted him to say he fought hard and lost rather than just gave up.
“Why didn’t you?”
“Many reasons. I felt strangely for nearly a week after Jonas.”
“What do you mean? Were you sick? Weak?” I remembered him after he’d absorbed Jonas’s energy. He’d never looked so healthy and strong, so filled with power. His eyes actually glowed bright green with it.
He shook his head. “I wasn’t sick or weak. But I didn’t feel like myself. It took me a while to recover. I’m better now.” He wasn’t making a big deal over it, but I wondered if that’s what had gained my father’s attention and concern.
“When I felt normal again,” he continued, “I asked King Desmond if I could visit the human world. He said no. After what happened in the Underworld I didn’t want to give him a reason to send me back there, so I didn’t get mad. Time passed. And here you are.” I took this in, studying the grassy ground before I lifted my gaze to meet his. “Okay. But did you miss me at all?”
His brows drew together. “Every day.”
A moment later, he attacked me, trying to take me by surprise, but I saw it coming and managed to spin out of the way.
“Well done,” he said, the smile returning to his face.
“Thanks.” Maybe I wasn’t so bad at this after all.
He didn’t give me a second to catch my breath. He came at me so fast I didn’t have time to duck it this time. He grabbed my arms and pushed me back against the castle wall. The length of his body was pressed against mine.
“Point for me,” he said.
My breath caught at our proximity, but I wanted to stay focused if I could. “I could knee you right now in a very painful location.”
“Try it.”
“I’m not that mean, even in this form.”
“Maybe you should stop being so nice, Nikki.” He raised an eyebrow. “Do you want me to win? Are you accepting defeat, just like that?”
Defeat? By being nice?
My eyes narrowed. Challenge accepted.
I attempted to do exactly what I threatened, but he twisted away from me just in time and he turned me around. My wings were pinned against his chest and my front was flat against the smooth black façade of the castle.
“Point for you,” I conceded with annoyance. He was stronger than I expected him to be. I was annoyed that he was able to restrain me like this so easily. Another part of me really liked the chance to be so close to him. Full body contact was okay with me when it came to Michael—
more than okay. I’d just like to be the one in control at the moment.
“I’ll take it,” he said. “Want to move on?”
“Yeah, okay. Fine. Let go of me.”
As he loosened his grip, I took my chance and spun around to grab his shoulders, shifting our positions so his back was pressed up against the wall.
“Point for me,” I told him.
“It’s yours.” Michael didn’t try to get the upper hand again, or move directly into our next lesson. He just stayed agains
t the wall, breathing hard. His hand was now free and my breath caught as he brushed a long fiery-red lock of hair off my face and tucked it behind my ear. He kept his hand on the side of my neck, sliding down to my collarbone and my skin tingled where he touched me. His gaze moved to my lips.
“This suddenly doesn’t feel like training,” I whispered.
He leaned closer to me. “No?”
“No.”
“I guess we’re lucky there’s no mistletoe in the Shadowlands.”
“You’re hilarious.” I gave him a sharp look and he gave me a grin in return. Definitely a point for him.
“You know,” Michael said, his fingers sliding warmly over the back at my neck, under my hair, making me tremble a little. “You really are gorgeous like this.” My heart pounded and I wasn’t doing a thing to move away from him yet. “You’re just saying that so I’ll let down my guard again.”
“Gorgeous,” he said again, undeterred. “But you’re beautiful in both forms. It makes it very difficult for me to concentrate when I’m this close to you.”
“It’s not working. I won’t let you distract me.” Still, I felt a whole lot of my resolve and most of my fight start to slide away.
In the beginning, I’d felt ugly in Darkling form. I still looked mostly human, I knew that.
More than my father did when he shifted form to full demon. But there wouldn’t be too many teenage girls who wanted horns and a tail, or felt all that pretty carrying around a set of leathery wings.
But the way Michael looked at me then would put a blush on my cheeks if I was in human form. In Darkling form, it just made me...
Okay, I was still blushing. A little.
Finally, Michael let me out of his very distracting embrace and I immediately felt disappointed despite my claims of not letting him get to me. He took a few steps back onto the main courtyard’s grassy surface. I cleared my throat and tried to focus again.
“All right, lesson three: fire power.” He gestured toward a target he’d set up to the far side of the courtyard. It looked like something that would be used for archery practice.