The average Iskandian is not enamored with magic, Jaxi said, but I’m positive General Zirkander wouldn’t object to having a sorcerer in one of his squadrons, and the others ought to learn to appreciate having your abilities up there. They would be foolish not to want any advantage that could help keep them alive.
Trip, thinking of how many times he’d seen Leftie circle his heart with two fingers, a superstitious gesture to ward off witches and magic, knew pilots had their foolish moments.
Your lieutenant is coming, Jaxi said. And she left her guard dog in the flier. Maybe she longs to cuddle with you.
Trip glanced back to see Rysha heading his way. More likely, she was coming to tell him they would be leaving soon, assuming the team intended to bring him and not leave him to be cannon fodder with the Cofah. He knew that was unlikely, but admitted to feeling a little resentful at the moment.
I will leave you for a private conversation, Azarwrath told him as Rysha drew nearer. But to answer your initial question, no, I do not wish to be left with the Cofah.
That’s fine, Trip said. I’m happy to have your lightning bolts streaking out of my flier. But I feel obligated to point out, since this may be your last chance, that if Kiadarsa survives the battle for the portal, she could take you back to your people, and maybe you could find another Cofah sorcerer to bond with, one that’s more powerful.
I’ve considered that, but I understand that your other soulblade is on loan.
Yes, Jaxi is linked to a healer back home.
Thus, you do not have a soulblade.
True, Trip said slowly, as what Azarwrath was suggesting sank in, but I’m just a pilot who barely knows anything.
I will not disagree with that, Azarwrath said blandly.
Jaxi giggled. Or was that a chortle?
But you are learning much quickly, and will progress even more quickly once you have time for training. As it is, I suspect your people will barely recognize you when you get home.
Trip knew the comment was meant to be encouraging, but he could only feel bleakness at the statement. He didn’t want to return home a stranger to his grandparents, or General Zirkander and his colleagues. He just wanted to be Captain Trip. Pilot extraordinaire. Occasional maker of furnishings and gadgets to please women. At least one woman, he amended as he watched Rysha approach.
Seven gods, what would she think about all this?
11
Rysha couldn’t see Trip’s face in the darkness, and she couldn’t tell what he was thinking. He hadn’t lifted a hand in invitation, though he’d been watching her approach. Was he lost in thought? Or had he realized what the squadron was planning, and it irked him that he’d been left out?
“Rysha.” He nodded as she stepped up to the railing beside him. Was there wariness in those two syllables?
“Blazer will probably come up soon to tell you, but we’ll be leaving in less than an hour. Our team. In the fliers.”
“I know.”
“Did Jaxi figure it out a while ago?” Rysha looked sidelong at him, almost asking if he’d figured it out.
“While I was sleeping. Apparently, soulblades don’t nap.”
“Oh? What do they do while you nap?”
“Pine with loneliness.”
Rysha swatted his arm, relieved by his humor. It seemed to mean he wasn’t irked. At least, not with her.
“I got to try my gun mount today,” she said, starting with that since it was an easy topic. “Only for one shot, which I used to peg a dragon-pigeon in its armored butt, but it was enough to see how useful it will be. Thank you for making it and installing it.”
“You’re welcome. I’m always glad to hear when my creations assist in dragon-pigeon assaults.”
“That happens often, does it?”
“This may have been the first time. If I ever open a gadget-making business, may I put your testimonial on the pamphlet?”
“Verbatim? No editing?”
“There’s no need to edit that testimonial.”
Rysha grinned, tempted to swat his arm again. Actually, she was tempted to lean against it, to lean against him. With their parkas, hoods, mittens, and scarves, she doubted they could warm each other up effectively by leaning together, but it would still be nice.
She’d been relieved when she’d seen him up here alone, not off somewhere with that sorceress. She hadn’t seen him reciprocate that woman’s touches, but Rysha also hadn’t been watching him day and night. And Leftie’s words about seduction had concerned her, for more reasons than one.
She wanted to find a way to let Trip know that she was developing—had developed—feelings for him. In case he’d been contemplating… other options. Because he didn’t know she was an option. Maybe he didn’t have such feelings for her, but she at least wanted him to know that she cared for him.
“I wanted to talk to you about a couple of things,” Rysha said, looking toward his face, though the darkness and fur-lined parka hood ensured she wouldn’t get any clues from it. “If it’s all right. Or did you want to be alone?”
“Trust me, I wasn’t alone.” Trip tapped the two sword hilts near his hips.
Again, she found the humor in his voice encouraging, but he hadn’t answered her question.
“I don’t know who else to talk to,” she said quietly.
“You can talk to me about anything.”
Could she? He didn’t seem one given toward hyperbole, but they hadn’t truly known each other that long.
“Anything? Even female problems? Leftie and Duck seemed completely uninterested in discussing them.”
He shifted, looking down at her, and she blushed, glad the darkness would hide her red cheeks. How silly of her to have brought that up. She suspected her subconscious was trying to avoid talking about more serious matters.
“You can tell me about them, but I don’t think I can fix them with a soldering iron and metal scraps.”
“This is likely true.” Rysha pushed her spectacles higher on her nose. “First off, since you apparently know all about our new plan, I’d like to ask you what you think. Or if you can think of any way we can do this without leaving the Cofah defenseless. I know they haven’t been that friendly to us, but we’re not technically at war with them right now, so throwing them to the wolves—the dragons—doesn’t seem right. Even if we were at war, these are mostly researchers. Aside from their sorceress, they don’t have any way to fight dragons.”
“I know, but I don’t know what to do. I asked Azarwrath if he wanted to stay with them and help them, but he’s disinclined.”
“Oh? Really? Because he thinks it’s a lost cause, and he’d end up left in an ice cave for all eternity?”
Trip paused. Considering his next words? “He wasn’t interested in bonding with Kiadarsa.”
Rysha also paused, to rethink a snide comment that wanted to spring from her lips. She was too old to act like some snippy teenager making disparaging comments about the female competition.
“Earlier today, while I was supposed to be sleeping and was instead wrestling with this issue, I did have a thought about how to help them,” Rysha said. “I actually think Blazer’s plan is good and improves our odds. I just can’t dismiss other people as expendable.”
“It’s not wrong to care.”
His words were off-hand and simple, but they touched her. He understood how she felt. And he didn’t seem to judge her for it, didn’t seem to think that someone training for the elite troops should harden herself and learn to accept that people died in military maneuvers.
She hadn’t meant to lean against him, but she did, pressing her shoulder against his.
At first, he didn’t react, but he soon shifted to wrap his arm around her shoulders. The wind was cold, and she wouldn’t have minded snuggling closer, but she wanted his opinion on her plan. If she was going to enact it, she had to do it soon—she was running out of time. But she had struggled to decide on her own and wanted someone to talk to about it.
; “We have three chapaharii swords,” Rysha said. “And you and the soulblades. I’m not going to say three is overkill and that we wouldn’t miss one if it disappeared, but one could make the difference between life and death for the Cofah on the airship. The dragons, if they sensed it, might hesitate to attack. That might give them more time. And it shouldn’t affect our own incursion. If anything, the dragons might then focus on the airship for longer, giving us more time to get in without them noticing.”
“So, you want to give one of the Cofah your sword?”
“Lend it to them. Just for tonight. And then, if all goes well, I fly over and get it back after the portal has been destroyed.” Rysha would, of course, need a pilot to fly her over, but she didn’t say that out loud. She didn’t want Trip to think that was the only reason she’d chosen to confide in him.
She truly couldn’t imagine going to anyone else about this, not even Kaika. As much as she respected Kaika, she didn’t believe she cared about the Cofah or would understand this choice. Kaika also might tell Blazer, and if Blazer outright forbade it, Rysha couldn’t hand over the blade without disobeying orders. Given the seriousness of the situation, that might be grounds for a court-martial. At least if she did it without telling the others until it was too late, it couldn’t be considered disobeying orders. She could still be court-martialed, of course. For handing over an irreplaceable artifact to the enemy, an artifact that could be key in defending Iskandia from dragons.
She rubbed her face, her cold cheeks. Was this the right thing? She was only at the beginning of her career, a career she’d dreamed of for a long time. Were these Cofah worth risking everything for? What would her parents say if she ended up kicked out of the army over this? What would Grandmother have said?
“You know if you need a pilot, I’m yours. And—” Trip added, his tone going dry, “I wouldn’t be that displeased if you weren’t carrying that sword around. But—” his tone turned serious again, “—I think you should tell Blazer and Kaika rather than taking them by surprise.”
Rysha grimaced. She’d considered that and knew it would be the more mature thing to do, but she kept thinking about that old axiom about it being easier to ask for forgiveness than for permission.
“I’ll stand by your side if you want to talk to them now,” he said.
She appreciated the offer, but she also knew he was just a pilot to them, and the new kid at that. Even though Rysha disagreed with that assessment of him, she was positive his words wouldn’t have a lot of sway with Kaika and Blazer.
“I can ask Jaxi to throb with an authoritative aura.” Trip squeezed her shoulders.
She laughed, but stopped when she realized she hadn’t been speaking her objections aloud and that he’d seemed to sense them anyway.
“Are you reading my thoughts?” Rysha asked.
He hadn’t been moving much, but he grew noticeably stiller.
“I know you probably can,” she said, “and I didn’t mean to make that an accusation. I just… I guess I’d just like to know.”
He lowered his arm, and she winced, wishing she hadn’t said anything. It was obvious he wanted to keep his abilities a secret, and that was understandable given how the majority of Iskandians felt about magic. She wished she could retract the words.
“You know I probably can?” Trip gripped the railing with his gloved hands and did not look at her.
“Well, you’ve spoken to me telepathically a couple of times now, so I didn’t need all of my degrees to figure it out.” Rysha smiled, hoping that humor could lighten the mood—and make him realize she wasn’t going to judge him for having dragon blood. Even if the mind-reading aspect made her uncomfortable, she thought she could learn to accept it. To accept him.
He looked sharply at her. “I didn’t realize… I didn’t mean to do that.”
“Really? I felt you help me with the dragon. I know you were the reason I fell at just the right time to avoid getting clubbed by that tail.”
“Oh.” He looked forward again, staring out at the white expanse and the dark mountain looming ahead.
“I’m glad you did.”
Even though he didn’t seem that approachable now, she risked resting her hand on his forearm and squeezing him through his sleeve. She wished he wasn’t wearing a parka, and that she wasn’t wearing gloves, so she could feel the warmth of his skin against hers.
“I can understand why you wouldn’t be eager to tell people, since it might not be well received, but if I can talk to you about female problems, you can most definitely talk to me about sorcerer problems.”
He snorted. “I’m not a sorcerer.”
“But you do have dragon blood.” Rysha looked over her shoulder to make sure nobody was nearby. There wasn’t anyone on deck, and only one person near the lamp in the glassed-in wheelhouse. The navigator wouldn’t be able to hear them from there.
“You’re not surprised.”
“No. I figured it out a long time ago.” Realizing he might find that odd, since they’d only known each other a couple of weeks, she amended the statement. “All right, I figured it out a few days ago. On the Pirate Isles. Before you spoke ‘be careful’ into my mind. I’m a brainy book girl, remember? I figure things out.”
“Ah.” He tightened his fingers around the railing and looked down at them.
Tensely. She didn’t want him to be tense or worried around her, but she didn’t know what else to say to make him more comfortable.
“Which isn’t always a great boon,” she said. “Sometimes, you figure things out that people would rather you wouldn’t.”
“I don’t mind you knowing,” he said quietly. “I’m just concerned about the others. Flying is all I ever wanted to do, and I’m afraid they wouldn’t want me in the squadron. I know Wolf Squadron and the capital are different from Cougar Squadron and Charkolt, but it’s still… It’s scary. I’ve spent my whole life hiding my quirks. Or trying to. My grandparents had to move a lot when I was young because of those quirks, because people would notice I was odd. Like my mother had been. I made it all the way to adulthood, even though there were a couple of close calls when I was young, a couple of times we had to abandon everything and leave town in the middle of the night. I didn’t even understand. I was too young to realize I was the problem.”
“Trip,” she whispered, his words tugging at her heartstrings, and stepped closer to him, wanting to ease his burden, or at least comfort him somehow. She slid her arm around his back and rested her other hand on his chest, looking up at him. “I’m sorry you had to live through that and that you lost your mother. And I get why you’re so wary now. I won’t tell anyone, I promise, but I do think you’ll find that you’re in the perfect place to let people know, if you choose to do so.”
“In sub-zero temperatures on a Cofah airship?”
She swatted him on the chest. “In Wolf Squadron and under General Zirkander’s nose. I’m sure if you told him, he wouldn’t bat an eye. Or does he already know? I assumed Sardelle did. And that Jaxi did before she agreed to go with you.”
“He knows, though I’m not sure he knew in the beginning. He figured it out when we fought those dragons attacking the city.”
“There you go. Zirkander and Sardelle already paved the way for sorcerous city defenders.”
“I know. I’ve discussed this with Jaxi. But as I pointed out to her, I’m not dating or married to a national hero who has the king’s ear.”
“Hm, yes, clearly a problem. Do you want me to help you to find a national hero to date when we get back? My family has connections.” She smirked at him, hoping to lighten his mood.
He gazed into her eyes for the first time since she’d confessed to knowing his secret. He also seemed to notice for the first time that she had an arm around him, for he returned the embrace, sliding his arm around her back. Too bad the parkas made it so she barely felt the gesture.
“I’m not sure who that would be,” he said. “Everyone pales in comparison to Zirkander, t
hough Leftie informs me that there are sports figures that people idolize.”
“Male or female?”
“Male, I believe. I’d have to be… flexible.”
“I’m not sure flexibility is what’s required. We could ask Kaika. She seems to know about all things bedroom related.”
“Even involving relationships between men?” Trip lifted his finger to wipe a snowflake off the center of one of her lenses.
His glove left a watery smudge, but she appreciated the sentiment. And it wasn’t as if she needed to see right now. It was night, and even if her lenses had been un-smudged, she wouldn’t have been able to make out his features.
“I wouldn’t be surprised,” Rysha said. “She’s quite worldly. She offered to give me a list of her recommended sex toys.”
She thought he might gape or snort, but all he said was, “Oh? Do you also have your eye on a national hero?”
“A table-making pilot, actually, though I’m a little concerned a beautiful sorceress is trying to seduce him.”
She gazed at him, nervous about what his reaction might be. She had wanted to talk about this, to let him know that she felt… feelings, but maybe this wasn’t the right moment, when he was wrapped up in other concerns.
“He’s not interested in sorceresses,” Trip said, touching her cheek with his fingers this time. “He likes women who come to his defense in pubs, threatening to beat up brutes that won’t leave him alone.”
Rysha snorted softly, though all manner of emotions rushed into her heart at this simple admission that he was interested in her. “I didn’t threaten to beat anyone up.”
“Would you have if they hadn’t left me alone?”
“Yeah.”
“I thought so,” he murmured, then lowered his mouth to hers.
She danced on the inside, spinning pirouettes. Her aunt would have said pirouettes were unladylike, as was reacting so strongly to some man she barely knew, but Rysha didn’t care. She leaned her chest against his and kissed him back eagerly, wanting to show him her enthusiasm, to let him know that she cared about him and that she’d stand beside him, no matter what. It didn’t matter that his veins held some dragon blood in them. She liked that he made her laugh, that he listened to her rambles, and that he paid attention to her.