Read Revolution in Flopdoodle Page 3


  "Er." he said.

  "Well?" asked His Majesty.

  "Er - um," said 'the captain, fiddling with the mainsheet, "Uh - Y - Y - you see Your Majesty, someone borrowed it on a Saturday night and didn't bring it back. B - but there are plenty of lifebelts." he added hopefully.

  "Good," said His Majesty, "Is the rigging safe? And does the ship leak much?"

  "You will be quite safe, Your Majesty. Oops."

  The mainsheet had slipped out of the Captain's hand, and the mainsail engulfed His Majesty, and. wrapped itself around him. At tthe same moment the wind caught it, and His Majesty shot forward across the deck. Fortunately Quangle had left the cabin door open, and His Majesty went clean through it, and ended his flight in his bunk, leaving the sail, which had caught on the door-knob, behind. The Captain went forward quietly and picked it up.

  "Good night, Your Majesty." he said cautiously.

 

  ***********

  "Ding ding, ding ding, ding ding, ding ding."

  "Eight bells!" shouted the Captain, "Starboard Watch on deck!"

  "Oh dear," groaned His Majesty, "I wonder why?"

  "Perhaps he's lost the Port Watch and wants to find out what time it is?" suggested Quangle, sitting up.

  They dressed themselves rapidly, and went on deck. The Captain was up already, and walking up and down the deck, while a bright morning sun shone over the muddy decks and off-white paint. Of the storm there was no trace.

  "Good morning, Your Excellencies," he greeted them cheerfully.

  "Good morning," replied His Majesty. "You seem very pleased with something today?"

  "I am," said the Captain. "You see," he went on, "The stiff breeze we had last night has died down, so we'll have the Engine fixed after breakfast and get you two back to the shore. By the way, we will really have to hurry. I have bad news for you."

  "News!" exclaimed. Quangle. remembering the boat had no wireless, "How did you get it? .And where from?"

  "One of the passengers has a portable radio," came the reply., "Your Majesty, the· Duke of Delphinium has gathered together a huge army, one of the largest ever seen in Flopdoodle. and is marching on Flopford, Your Majesty's absence has been kept secret, but you will obviously want to get back as soon as possible."

  His Majesty looked concerned. Flopdudlian law decrees that the King is only King as long as he holds the capital city. It saves argument.

  "I'm afraid that it will. take at least four to six hours' work to repair the Engine - but we should have you. back at Port Starboard before midnight, definitely."

  At that moment the Cook shouted that breakfast was ready, so they went down the companion way to get it.

  It was a hurried meal, for despite their hunger, everyone wanted to get the ship under control as soon as possible. Immediately after finishing his large plate of ham and eggs, Quangle went on deck, closely followed. by His Majesty. Sailors had joined the Engineers already there and hard at work. His Majesty and Quangle retreated to the foredeck to keep out of the way.

  For four and a half hours the men worked. and at the end of that time they all came on deck except the Chief, and another Engineer who were going to start up the Engine. They closed the Safety Valve, and filled up the boiler with lake water; meanwhile the burners had been filled with paraffin, so they were lighted, and pushed under it. About ten minutes later the Boiler began to sing like the large tea-kettle which in fact it was, and soon was boiling merrily; with clouds of steam filling the air. While the other Engineer went on deck to get some more paraffin, the Chief turned on a small tap on the side of the Boiler ... and made himself a cup of tea. Then, after waiting a bit longer to get a fairly high steam pressure, he turned another tap, and soon the mellow and soothing "Eeeee CLANK - a Tishhhhh CLANG!" told everyone on, board. that all was back to normal, and that the S.S. Tubby was heading for home.

 

  **********

  His Majesty, now having a lot of new things to worry about, was resting in a. deck-chair on the foredeck, and talking to Quangle.

  "You see," he pointed out, "The problem is that that creep Colonel Parboyle has defected to the rebels, taking his troops with him. So I can only count on the immediate support of the Palace Guards and the Kitchen Cavalry, while the rebels, according to the reports, already have a well equipped army of a thousand men or more, so the situation is, to say the least, rather awkward. It all depends on what the rest of the Army think."

  "Very awkward," said Quangle thoughtfully, "We really must get back as fast as possible, for if they've really got so far already, we only have two days to act if we are to prevent a siege."

  There was a sudden loud CRUNCH from the bows; accompanied by a jolt that threw everyone flat on their faces. It was followed by a rumbling, splintery. crashing. THUD from amidships. and at the same time a big black thing rose from under the bows, flicked off all the masts and the funnel, and plunged 'into the. sea like a bomb going off. The ship nearly capsized, the rudder came off, and people flew in all directions.

  "That was a whale," said His Majesty, from under a. heap of four deckchairs.

  "Indeed?" said the galley-stove, with a voice uncommonly like Quangle's. "How do you know?"

  "I've read about them in books."

  The stove got up. Quangle blinked once or twice, and went to the rail. A hundred metres away lay a whale. It looked cross rather than injured.

  "You were right," remarked Quangle, "He must have cut himself badly but he seems all right.lI

  At that moment the Captain arrived on the scene,

  "Whale!" he gasped without greeting, "The ship's leaking. And the masts have gone. And the rudder."

  "What about that thud amidships?" asked Quangle.

  "And what about the Engine?" asked His Majesty.

  "Yes, what about the Engine?" said Quangle, noticing that the paddles had .stopped, "Is it all right?"

  "I hope so," replied the Captain, pushing his hair back and straightening his cap. "I suppose I'd better go and see."

  They followed him down the companion-way, and the Captain opened. the Engine Room door. Immediately the Chief Engineer sprang out. His head caught the Captain in the stomach, and clutching each other they bounced off the windlass, sat on the Ship's Cat, and dropped neatly into the hold on top of a pile of crates and boxes, which collapsed beneath them, and pitched them into a pool of bilge-water. The cat fled and hid itself in the Captain's best boots, which usually stayed in one corner of his cabin.

  After this little bother had subsided, and the Captain and the Chief Engineer had been pulled out of the hold, they went back to the Engine Room. This time His Majesty opened the door, after first making sure that there were no more Engineers to pop out, and a terrible sight met their eyes.

  The beam had come off and fallen on the rest of the Engine

  "That's torn it!" said the Chief Engineer. "Sails gone, engine gone, rudder gone, everything gone - why we might as well be a tub."

  "We are a tub," remarked His Majesty.

  "And," said the Chief Engineer, sounding most serious, "we can never fix that engine while we are afloat."

  "So, we are adrift," said the Captain.

  "Yes, we're adrift, said Quangle.

  .

  REVOLUTION IN FLOPDOODLE

  Chapter Five

  The next day after lunch, the Captain called them into his cabin.

  “You will be glad to know,” he said, producing a map, “that I was able to get a sight of the sun to-day, and that I work out our position to be about here,” and he indicated a point some thirty kilometres from the start of the River Llydhyl. You will see that our position is rather dangerous, as we shall certainly be sucked into the river by the current, and as we have no rudder we may be dashed to pieces on a rock."

  "However,“ he continued, "we may be able to anchor in the shallow water and wait for rescue. In any case, you may be sure that we shall do all we can to get you back to
Flopford as soon as possible. Which reminds me the Duke of Delphinium is now only six days march from the capital, and he has increased his army by an enormous extent, some scouts putting the additional. number as high as several thousand. It was in the news this morning."

  “How soon do you think we shall reach the mouth of the river?” asked Quangle. "We really need to get back as soon as possible, now. We need to attack the rebel army before it gets too strong."

  “Before noon tomorrow,” replied the Captain. “If you take the speeds of the wind, of the tides, of the current, and so on, and subtract from them ....”

  "Quite so,” said His Majesty. “I understand. Perfectly,” he added.

  **********

  It was to-morrow.

  It was 10.30 a.m.

  The S.S. Tubby was now quite close to the land. From his position in the bow Quangle watched numbers of people running to get a closer view. They still looked very small and far away.

  He sighed and turned away. He thought about the Duke of Delphinium. Rebellions were a nuisance ....

  "Hullo Quangle," His Majesty broke in on his thoughts. "Back to the rebellion, eh?"

  "How did you guess?'* he enquired, startled.

  "I just thought you would be thinking about it,” he confessed. “I am."

  “I've brought you the binoculars,” he added. after a few minutes.

  "Thank you," said Quangle, taking them. He looked at the shore. A man and a boy, pointing; a woman with a basket, two girls – and another man with a black object on a stand with something white over it.

  As he watched, he saw the man and the boy come up to the object, hand its owner something and in turn they bent down and peered through it. Then the boy stood up and shook his fist at the ship. A telescope, thought Quangle; probably the white thing was a notice saying something like, "Penny a peep to see 'the shipwreck" or something ..... He was suddenly struck by a thought; and turned round sharply. It was as he had feared – the Royal Standard was fluttering at the mainmast.

  "Captain!" called Quangle, "You'd better have the Royal Standard hauled down. There may be rebels on the shore.”

  "Aye, aye, Your Excellency" replied the Captain from the chart-room. “STRIKE THE ROYAL STANDARD!“ he shouted.

  “Tut tut! High treason!" exclaimed one of the other passengers, and it took Quangle several minutes to explain that the Captain’s order merely meant that the flag was to be pulled down; in which time the controversial ,flag HAD been pulled down and the green, white and black national flag hoisted in its place. It was upside down, but the Captain explained this was a sign of a ship in distress.

  “I’m still afraid that someone on shore may have seen it,” remarked Quangle. “You see, if it has been recognized, then we run a risk of being captured by rebels as soon as we land."

  “Well it is a risk,“ said His Majesty, "Still, we should find out soon if it has or not.n

  ***********

  Noon.

  His Majesty and Quangle were anxiously examining the shore, where a fairly large crowd had collected.

  “Stand by the anchor!” ordered the Captain.

  “Aye aye. sir."

  “Heave the lead.”

  “Aye, aye, sir."

  A sailor picked up the lead, a heavy weight on the end of a long piece of rope, swung it round his head to the alarm of His Majesty, and let go. It went into the water.

  "Three fathoms, sir,”. said the sailor, feeling under water with it. “Two and a half . ....... Two ..... " he corrected himself.

  “Drop anchor,“ commanded the Captain. This was done.

  “OWlll said His Majesty, feeling his toe. “Dolt! Idiot! Nincompoop!” He relapsed into silence.

  “Two .... One and three quarters.....”

  The anchor was pushed overboard. The rope tautened, and the ship stopped moving. Everyone gave a sigh of relief, and some smiled.

  “Thank goodness," said. His Majesty. “Those people on the bank seem

  to be very pleased. I wonder...."

  “SCRAWNK!”.

  “So do I,“ said Quangle, looking anxious.

  “SCRAWNKKK”

  “The anchor's dragging,” exclaimed. the Captain, rushing forward.

  "I think the cable has broken,” observed Quangle quietly.

  He rushed forward to help the Captain pull it in.. It came with such ease that they nearly fell over. The other passengers helped them.

  The cable had broken just above the 'anchor.

  The passengers groaned, but the people on the bank seemed furious.

  The boat, caught by the current, began to move rapidly towards the river mouth, and in ten minutes was in the river itself. The angry crowd followed them. One or two of their number waved Revolutionary Flags and shouted "Down. with the King!"

  Until nightfall the ship was accompanied down the river by running people on the left bank.

  **********

  With daybreak people began to follow the ship again. The morning was hot and.clouded over. Despite this fact, people in the crowds seemed to have amazing energy, jumping fences, walls, and ditches to keep up, climbing trees to shoot the people on board from the cover, waving flags, singing rude songs, and shouting; “Down with the King, Up with the Revolution,” and very occasionally "Hoorah for the Duke of Delphinium!“

  In the middle of the day, while the crowds had gone home for their lunch, the cook managed to feed the passengers besieged in their cabins, the crew besieged in the forecastle, and His Majesty, Quangle, and the Captain, who had been forced to stay in the chart room, with hot toast, egg sandwiches and cocoa. With the return of the crowds the siege began again, because no one could even look out of a window without getting shot at, or having fireworks thrown at him.

  There were gains on the other side too, however, for when one man had tried to climb on board, the cook had thrown a kettle-full of hot water over him. Since then, people had stayed well back, and waited for the ship to touch. Once it had done so, but fortunately the bank was too low, and no one was able to scramble up.

  "I don't like this at all,” said His Majesty as a bullet broke the only chart room window that had remained whole. "But what can we do?"”

  “Never mind,” replied Quangle. “We’re still alive.”

  It was growing dark. The first stroke of lightning flashed across the twilit sky; the first large drops of rain came pattering down, and it was raining heavily when, a few minutes later, the S.S. Tubby sank.

  .

  REVOLUTION IN FLOPDOODLE

  Chapter Six

  “Gug glug” exclaimed His Majesty, keeping himself afloat with one hand, and opening the chartroom door with the other.

  It was a dark and stormy night. A gale was shrieking overhead and large fat drops of rain were splashing down. A new roll of thunder died away in the distance.

  “Keep together!" spluttered Quangle, as his head bobbed out of the water. “Where are you?“

  A flash of lightning showed him His Majesty clinging to a lifebelt a few feet away, and at that the Captain appeared in the whirlpool left by the sinking Tubby.

  "Make for the right hand shore!" he gurgled.

  They tried to do so. Ever and again came a flash of lightning, while the thunder kept up a continual barrage in the distance. His Majesty reached the shore first and helped Quangle out. They went to look for the Captain, who had landed further downstream.

  "Is everyone else safe?", asked His Majesty.

  "I hope so,“ came the Captain’s reply. “AHOY THERE!"

  Several others appeared and stood there dripping.

  "All present and correct, sir” announced the First Mate, stepping forward.

  "Well the first thing to do is to get into shelter,” said Quangle. “Does anyone know where we are? What, no one?"

  “I think I can see a light over there, sir, on the other side of those trees,” said the First Mate, pointing. “Shall we try there?”

  They all thought it was
the best thing to do in the circumstances, and set off across the riverside meadow, tripping over several sleeping cows before the reached the other side and found a small road. This they crossed, there being no sign of any traffic, and went along it a little way, before reaching a pair of imposing gates.

  “Should we?” asked Quangle, as His Majesty made for them.

  “Why not?” asked His Majesty.

  Quangle could think of several excellent reasons, but as they could hardly stay out in the driving rain he remained silent, and they passed through the gateway. The drive was long and winding, and had trees arched above it at first. It was also very rough, with lots of potholes, so they had to mind their step. After about five minutes they came out into the open. The drive wiggled round a corner and dropped down to large vague shape before them. A lightning flash revealed it as a large house with towers.

  His Majesty, accompanied by Quangle, and followed by the Captain, his crew, the other passengers and the First Mate bringing up the rear, climbed the steps up to the heavy iron-studded oak door. Another flash of lightning showed a bell rope, and Quangle gave it a vigorous tug. From some place in the building came the clanging of an old bell, and the creak of the bell wires.

  They stood there quietly for several seconds. At last there came hurried footsteps, the rattle of bolts being drawn back and the door was opened a few inches; but on a chain, His Majesty noted. He looked at Quangle.

  “Who is there?” came a quavering voice from the other side of the door.

  “His Majesty the King and the Earl of Fizzling Towers,” announced Quangle.

  “Which king,” asked the door.

  “Surely there is only one King of Flopdoodle!” exclaimed His Majesty, aghast, before Quangle could stop him.

  The door gave a joyful gasp of relief and opened wide.

  “Oh, I am so sorry, Your Majesty,” apologised the butler. “In these troubled times one cannot be too careful. And Your Lordship! I am so glad to see you home again safely.”

  The others looked suitably impressed. It was indeed Fizzling Towers. They were led into the Drawing Room, where the situation was explained, and the butler immediately started to make arrangements. Dry clothes were provided, and although many wished to go to bed straight away, beds were warmed and tea made. After it, His Majesty and Quangle went to the Study to discuss the revolutionary situation in private. They learnt from the newspapers and radio that the Duke of Delphinium had brought his troops (or someone had brought them for him) to within three days of Flopford, and had encamped for the night. The Duke had been proclaimed to be the rightful King and had announced he would take the title of Richard V. Spies had also been trying to steal the State Crown. This amused His Majesty, as he had taken it with him, and at that very moment had it on his head.