This is stil that same day Im writing down here. The day my dad got kilt. We put the dogs head on the poal on top of the gate house. Lorna Elswint up there with it. Littl Kids zanting down be low. Playing Black Pack and singing:
Ful of the Moon Ful of the Moon
Ful of the Moon nor dont look back
Folleree Folleroo on your track
Oo hoo hoo Yoop yaroo
Folleree Folleroo follering you
If they catch you in the darga
Arga warga
Lorna she lookit over the side she said to the kids, ‘There aint no Ful Moon this nite there aint no Black Pack running. Its 2 days pas the Ful.’
Littl Nimbel Potter he said, ‘3rd of the Ful and stil shewl pul. My dad he seen Riddley Walker kil that dog and my dad he said that dog wil fetch.’
Lorna said, ‘Fetch what?’
Nimbel said, ‘Fetch some 1 over to the dog peopl.’ He laid his head over on 1 side to show his neck and he showit his teef like he wer a dog and going to bite.
Lorna said, ‘Nimbel you ever seen any dog peopl?’
Nimbel said, ‘O yes Ive seen them times a nuff.’
Lorna said, ‘Whatd they look like then?’
Nimbel said, ‘They throw a wite shadder dont they. Every body knows that.’ He ternt his self roun then and gone back to playing with the others. Singing:
Gennl men wil do it front to back
When they do it with the ladys of the Ful Moon pack
All the ladys do it back to front
When they drop ther nickers and they show ther
Moony in the holler moony on the hil
If you wont do it then your sister wil
I gone up on the gate house and looking at the head. The day gone colder. The muddling from the rains froze hard and the calling of the crows col on the air. Looking at that old leaders woar down teef.
Lorna said to me, ‘You heard the story of why the dog wont show its eyes?’
I said, ‘No I never.’
She said, ‘Thats what happens with peopl on the way down from what they ben. The storys go.’ She tol me the story then. This is it wrote down the same:
Why the Dog Wont Show Its Eyes
Time back way way back befor peopl got clevver they had the 1st knowing. They los it when they got the clevverness and now the clevverness is gone as wel.
Every thing has a shape and so does the nite only you cant see the shape of nite nor you cant think it. If you put your self right you can know it. Not with knowing in your head but with the 1st knowing. Where the number creaper grows on the dead stoans and the groun is sour for 3 days digging the nite stil knows the shape of its self tho we dont. Some times the nite is the shape of a ear only it aint a ear we know the shape of. Lissening back for all the souns whatre gone from us. The hummering of the dead towns and the voyces befor the towns ben there. Befor the iron ben and fire ben only littl. Lissening for whats coming as wel.
Time back way way back 1 time it wer Ful of the Moon and a man and woman sqwatting by ther littl fire. Sqwatting by ther littl fire and afeart of the nite. The dog wer in the nite and looking tords the fire. It wernt howling it wer jus looking at the fire. The man and woman seen the fire shyning in the dogs eyes. The man throwit meat to the dog and the dog come in to them by the fire. Brung its eyes in out of the nite then they all lookit at the nite to gether. The man and the woman seen the nite in the dogs eyes and thats when they got the 1st knowing of it. They knowit the nite the same as the dog knowit.
You know what they got 1st knowing of. She has diffrent ways she shows her self. Shes that same 1 shows her moon self or she jus shows her old old nite and no moon. Shes that same 1 every thing and all of us come out of. Shes what she is. Shes a woman when shes Nite and shes a woman when shes Death. The nite hearths the day. Every day has the shape of the nite what it come out of. The man as knows that shape can go in to the nite in the nite and the nite in the day time. The woman as knows that shape can be the nite and take the day in her and bearth the new day.
Wel they got that 1st knowing they got it looking in the dogs eyes in the Ful of the Moon. When the man and woman got that 1st knowing from the dog they made a contrack with the dog in the Ful of the Moon. They roadit on to gether with the dog and foraging to gether. Dint have no mor fear in the nite they put ther self right day and nite that wer the good time. Then they begun to think on it a littl. They said, ‘If the 1st knowing is this good what myt the 2nd knowing and the 3rd be and so on?’
They cawt a goat and lookit in its eye. You know what eye the goat has its the clevver eye. The man and woman looking in that clevver eye and they thot: Why shud we be foraging the woal time? They cawt other goats they made a fents and pent them up. They gethert weat and barly they had bread and beer then they wernt moving on the lan no mor they startit in to form it. Stoppit in 1 place then with sheds and stock and growings. They wernt outside in the nite no mor they wer inside looking out. The nite jus lookit dark to them they dint see nothing else to it no mor. They los out of memberment the shapes of nite and worrit for ther parpety they myt get snuck and raidit. They made the dog keap look out for ther parpety.
Every morning they were counting every thing to see if any thing ben took off in the nite. How many goats how many cows how many measurs weat and barly. Cudnt stop ther counting which wer clevverness and making mor the same. They said, Them as counts counts moren them as dont count.’
Counting counting they wer all the time. They had iron then and big fire they had towns of parpety. They had machines et numbers up. They fed them numbers and they fractiont out the Power of things. They had the Nos. of the rain bow and the Power of the air all workit out with counting which is how they got boats in the air and picters on the wind. Counting clevverness is what it wer.
When they had all them things and marvelsome they cudnt sleap realy they dint have no res. They wer stressing ther self and straining all the time with counting. They said, ‘What good is nite its only dark time it aint no good for nothing only them as want to sly and sneak and take our parpety a way.’ They los out of memberment who nite wer. They jus wantit day time all the time and they wer going to do it with the Master Chaynjis.
They had the Nos. of the sun and moon all fractiont out and fed to the machines. They said, ‘Wewl put all the Nos. in to 1 Big 1 and that wil be the No. of the Master Chaynjis.’ They bilt the Power Ring thats where you see the Ring Ditch now. They put in the 1 Big 1 and woosht it roun there come a flash of lite then bigger nor the woal worl and it ternt the nite to day. Then every thing gone black. Nothing only nite for years on end. Playgs kilt peopl off and naminals nor there wernt nothing growit in the groun. Man and woman starveling in the blackness looking for the dog to eat it and the dog out looking to eat them the same. Finely there come day agen then nite and day regler but never like it ben befor. Day beartht crookit out of crookit nite and sickness in them boath.
Now man and woman go afeart by nite afeart by day. The dog all lorn and wishful it keaps howling for the nites whatre gone for ever. It wont show its eyes no mor it wont show the man and woman no 1st knowing. Come Ful of the Moon the sadness gets too much the dog goes mad. It follers on the man and womans track and arga warga if it catches them.
The fires col
My storys tol
I said to Lorna, ‘I thot it ben Eusa made the 1 Big 1.’
Lorna said, ‘I never said he dint.’
I said, ‘Wel you jus tol in this story it ben that man and woman done it plus they bilt the Power Ring and all.’
She said, ‘You hear diffrent things in all them way back storys but it dont make no diffrents. Mosly they aint strait storys any how. What they are is diffrent ways of telling what happent.’
I said, ‘Ben there a strait story past down amongst the tel women?’
She said, ‘There bint no tel women time back way back. Nor there aint never ben no strait story I ever heard. Bint no writing for 100s and 100s of years til it b
egun agen nor you wunt never get a strait story past down by mouf over that long. Onlyes writing I know of is the Eusa Story which that aint nothing strait but at leas its stayd the same. All them other storys tol by mouf they ben put to and took from and changit so much thru the years theyre all bits and blips and all mixt up.’
I said, ‘That about the 1st knowing in the story. How they got it looking in the dogs eyes. Be that blip or jus a way of saying or what?’
She said, ‘Why you asking?’
I said, ‘Wel that old dog I kilt I lookit in its eyes dint I. Nor I never got no 1st knowing out of it did I.’
She said, ‘May be you got it only you dont know it yet.’
I said, ‘Have you got it?’
She said, ‘Every bodys got it its in every 1 of us only we cant get to it til it comes to us 1 way or a nother.’
I said, ‘Its come to you aint it.’
She said, ‘Yes its come to me nor there aint no use asking what it is becaws its what there aint no words for.’
Wel any way thats the story of why the dog wont show its eyes.
Back then in this time I ben writing of I never knowit any 1 ben dog kilt only a kid it wer Follery Digman he got dog et years back. It wer Ful of the Moon and he staggelt behynt a trade crowd coming back. Some times other times of mooning it lookit to me like the dogs ben near ready to come frendy only it never happent. Nor I never heard of no 1 tame a pup. Heard of some 1 got 1 Ice I dont know how they done it. They never tamit tho. Soons it got big a nuff it dug unner the fents and gone.
Theres dogs in the Eusa Story. Folleree & Folleroo. Theyre mor blip dogs nor real Is tho.
4
We done the berning that nite on the bye bye hump. The moon wer cloudit over and a hy wind blowing. I put the 1st torch to the stack then Straiter Empy for the crowd then Reckman Bessup for Widders Dump then Lorna Elswint for las. Arnge flames upping in the dark and liting all the faces roun. Catching that time of that nite stoppt on all them faces. You cud smel the berning sharp on the air mixt with the meat smel from the divvy roof. Dogs begun to howl it wer coming and going on the wind. The fire blowing in the wind and the sparks whup off in to the dark and gone. Dark and gone. Befor the wording we sung Sarvering Gallack Seas:
Pas the sarvering gallack seas and flaming nebyul eye
Power us beyont the farthes reaches of the sky
Thine the han what shapit the black
Guyd us there and guyd us back
Straiter Empy said, Thine hans for Brooder Walker.’
We all thinet hans then roun the fire and Straiter Empy wordit 1st. He said, ‘Brooder Walker. A good man and done good connexions. Done his bes for this crowd like his father done befor him. Like his son wil after him. Out of the dark he come and in to the dark he gone. In to the 1st knowing and the Master Chaynjis.’
Reckman Bessup wordit nex. He said, ‘Brooder Walker. He wer a connexion man the same as me. I never seen him doing no connexions tho Ive only seen him jobbing on the form and this day Ive crowdit back to fents with him with dead mans iron on me. He connectit shows for you. Connectit with a shovvel or a leaver poal for us. Put his han to what ever he done and took a good grip on it.’
It gone right roun the circel then every 1 saying a word or 2 even if it wernt nothing only ‘Bye bye Brooder.’ I had las wording only I dint say nothing I kep my words for him inside me. Then we unthinet. The fire berning hot and hy and Lorna Elswint up front for the tel. Face all sharp and rinkelt in the fire lite and the shadders moving on it.
She wer looking at the fire then looking up in to the dark. She said, ‘Bond fires thats what they use to call them. Big fires they use to bern on hy groun to lite them others back to fetch us. Boats in the air o yes. Them air boats as never come back. Becaws them as got a way to the space stations they jus done ther dying out there in stead of down here. Now here we stan and singing that song to bern our dead. No 1 coming back to get us out of this. Onlyes way wewl get out of it is to dy out of it.’ She dint say nothing for a littl jus stanning there and looking up in to the dark. Dogs howling in the sylents and the wind moaning.
Lorna lookit roun at every body slow. She had a way of doing it youwd hear the crowd like groan a littl unner ther breaf for craving what shewd say. She said, ‘3 things and blipful all of them. 1 is Brooder Walker kilt in the digging. 2 is the babby dead beartht at the form. 3 is the old dog offering and took by Brooder Walkers son. You bes be careful thinking on it tho becaws if you start out with Brooder Walker dead youwl easy fynd false foller and get mixt up with your fealings.
‘Bes go slow and scanful then. Bes dont start with Brooder Walker dead. Les jus tern it roun and look at it the other way. Put it in a diffrent foller and look at it backards starting with 3 in stead of 1. 3 is the dog. Think on that dog and what wer he? Old he wer and teef woar down. See him on your track and coming at you. Coming from behynt and you tern roun and look and there hes coming to you oansome getting bigger bigger. Offering. Thats what youwl say. Hes offering. Say agen what is he? Old and woar out. Wheres he coming from? Coming from behynt you. Mynd you he aint coming from in front of you. No that old and woar outs coming at you from behynt. What dyou do? Hol your spear and let him run on to it same as Riddley Walker done.’
Every body looking at me like they wisht theyd had the chance. I fealt like I mus be some 1 special right a nuff.
Lorna said, ‘Very good and wel done you. All that old and woar out what ben follering on behynt its gone now. Cleart a way. Now weare ready for the new so let it come. Hooray here comes a babby you cant ask bettern that for new. Its a form babby mynd you that. Mark you that and noat you wel. Heres that babby which its No. 2 counting backards and its the same frontwards its the middl 1 of the 3. O dear o dear o dear that babbys dead beartht. Why in the worl did that littl new life come in dead?
‘Where ben that new life coming in to? Widders Dump. You know what they ben doing there. It aint jus only forming they ben doing there with stock and growings they ben digging they ben croaking iron. They ben digging up that old time Bad Time black time. Now weare at the las weve come to No. 1 and Brooder Walker. Widders Dump and thats where Aunty come for him. Stoan boans and iron tits and teef be twean her legs. Brooder Walker dug her up and she come down on top of him o yes.
‘Our connexion man and what ben he connectit to? You heard it out of this formers mouf the 1 as brung the dead mans iron. Brooder Walker ben connectit to a shovel and a leaver poal and digging up Bad Time. Ben that a right connexion or a wrong 1?’ She lookit roun and waiting for a anser to that. Peopl looking 1 to a nother and some to Reckman Bessup and some to me nor they wunt say nothing.
Lorna said, ‘O yes youwl want to think on that you dont want your mouf to walk you where your feet dont want to go. Wel never mynd. Youve seen what come of that connexion. Now its broak weve got to make a new 1.’
Peopl looking at me then. Brooder Walkers son and going to be the new connexion man.
Lorna said, ‘Every thing in its time weve stil got things to deal with this nite. Les jus tern them 3 things roun agen and have 1 las look. 1 the old connexion broak and finisht. 2 the form brings in a babby dead. 3 is the nindicater and its a dead dog. Its the old and woar out run its self on to a yung spear out of our crowd. Myt there be mor to it as wel? O yes I dessay there myt. Whats in that old woar out dog? You know whats in that dog its 1st knowing. 1st knowing and the old ways from back befor the clevverness. Thats all new to us tho innit. Becaws weve never had it yet. So that dog is dubbl blipful. Its the old going out plus its the new coming in and that new is old old 1st knowing. Took by 1 of ours.
Theres my tel
Keap you wel
Every body looking at me agen. I cud stil hear them words in my ears: ‘Took by 1 of ours.’ Lorna looking at me as wel. That wer when I begun to feal like the dog wernt no where near the end of it. I begun to feal like peopl wer looking to me for some thing mor.
We gone back to the divvy roof then. I skint the dog and we roastit then eve
ry 1 et some of it. ‘Telling for us and walking with us,’ Lorna said. When I had that old leader on his back to make the long cut down the middl his front legs wer like out stretcht arms it took me strange to see that.
Aftrwds I skint the head as wel. I had in mynd to sew the head and body skin to gether and make a hood. I wer going to take the teef out of the skul and dril hoals in them and put them all roun the face hoal of the hood. I never did get to do any of that tho.
5
After that tel that nite every 1 begun to look at me diffrent. Winking and like dodging ther heads or giving me the thums up syn. Even Straiter Empy. I said to Lorna, ‘Im begining to feal like youve put some thing on me only I dont know what it is.’
She said, ‘Ive put some thing on you have I. Be that Truth? Aint there some thing without me putting it on you? Some thing coming to you? Like a far thing come close?’
Wel she had me there I cudnt say no becaws I did have that in my mynd. The far come close took by the littl come big. Dint realy know what that far come close myt be I wer waiting for it to show its self.
Nex morning after the berning the Bernt Arse Pack follert us the woal way from How Fents to Widders Dump. New leader he wer all black and when ever I lookit back he had his head up and looking at me with his ears prickt up. Driffing closer like he wer looking for a staytmen from me only he dint know if I knowit so he stayd out of bow shot.
When we got to the digging there wer the girt big thing what kilt Dad it wer stil in the hoal where we lef it. Chalker Marchman the lstman of the digging he wer talking to a littl nothing looking witey bloak dint look no moren 10 years old. It wernt the shortness of him I aint a tall man my self but this 1 he lookit like his dad pult out too soon when they ben making him. Witey hair and pinky eyes nor you cudnt see his eye brows they wer that lite. Dint even have the beginnings of a beard.