“Get rid of them whenever,” I murmured, rolling up on my toes to kiss his jaw. I rolled back and caught his eyes. “But kiss me when you come to bed.”
He smiled at me with his eyes. “I’ll be happy to oblige that too.”
I smiled back. “And I’ll be happy that you do.”
He bent in to touch his mouth to mine before he broke from my hold. Then he claimed me right back with an arm draped around my shoulders which he used to guide me to the door.
I slid my arm along his waist and we walked that way, having to shift sideways to get through the door while connected, but we stayed connected down the hall.
We broke off at the mouth of the hall after he gave my temple a light kiss.
Joker went to the couch.
I went to the kitchen, calling out to ask if anyone needed a fresh brew.
I got four yays. I took four bottles out to the boys and got a soft look from my biker when I did.
After that, I ate some crackers and cheese, washed them down with some flavored fizzy water, and shut down the kitchen. I gave verbal goodnights to the boys.
Joker’s was given physically as I bent over the couch and he tipped his head way back so I could give him a brief kiss.
He added running his fingers along my jaw with a finale of a warm look. I memorized that to give it back one day.
I checked on Travis one last time, and when I hit my room, I was suddenly exhausted in a way I knew I was crashing after a long day.
But it was the first time since the time we had the chat about my pregnancy nightshirt that I’d gone to bed without Joker. So it was the first time I went to bed needing a nightgown, seeing as Joker was always in the mood when we hit the bed and he went about disrobing me. After that, I usually had enough in me to pull on panties and pass out.
So I went to my drawers and tiredly fretted as I pawed through my pre-pregnancy nighties.
I picked a stretchy one (for obvious reasons) that had a fullish bottom (also chosen for obvious reasons) and a ruched bodice, empire waist, a tiny row of white lace across the top and hem and it was periwinkle blue.
I put it on and it fit snug at my breasts (not surprising) but otherwise, looking down at myself, it wasn’t that bad. Still, I inspected myself in the master bathroom mirror while I brushed my teeth and washed my face.
It would do. And anyway, I would be sleeping so I didn’t have to deal with whatever Joker’s reaction would be until morning.
I went to bed not thinking about my nightie but thinking about how I liked knowing my boyfriend’s buds (who were also my friends) were hanging on my couch watching TV. It felt nice. It felt normal. It felt like something that might fit in my revised dream, which was turning out better than the one I thought I wanted.
I fell asleep thinking that.
I was woken up by Joker’s kiss, which included his hand on my hip, feeling my nightie.
Thus I was woken up learning early how Joker felt about the nightie he could feel but not so much see.
And what I learned was that he liked it.
And how I learned that was, when Joker was done showing me how he felt, I fell back into a sated sleep snuggled up with my biker with the nightie on the floor, wearing nothing but panties.
Joker
The next day, Joker was walking through the Compound after taking a shower and changing clothes. Even though Carissa was off, he’d worked that day at the garage because his build was on a deadline. Now, he was done with what he needed to do, showered, and on his way to her.
He had his hand to the front door when his phone rang.
He pulled it out as he pulled open the door and stepped into the Denver sunlight, which meant he had to squint at his phone.
He grinned, took the call, and put the phone to his ear as he pulled his shades out of his hair and put them over his eyes.
“Yo, Lie,” he greeted.
“Okay, bud, you can’t strut your Carson goodness back into our lives then disappear,” Linus said as reply. “Mrs. Heely is pissed. Which means command performance at her place for dinner. Tuesday. And Car, prepare ’cause my brood and you at her place for dinner is a tight fit. But she’s not takin’ no for an answer. She called Kam and gave her what for about you, which meant my woman gave me what for about you. And even though Kam offered her our kitchen, Mrs. Heely is standin’ firm. Her place. I figure this means we’re all in for it because she intends to trot the lot of us out to her cronies. She’s big on doin’ that. Old folk jockey for position, and the best ammo they got is to brag about how many people give a shit about them. So best be on your game ’cause you’re gonna get picked over by a bunch of biddies and none a’ them are gonna like your hairstyle.”
Joker had stopped at his bike and was grinning when he said, “Sorry, Lie. Shit’s gone down that I had to focus on. But I’ll give you and Mrs. Heely a call if I can make it.”
“You didn’t hear me, Car,” Linus returned. “This is a command performance. There’s no if about it.”
“Gotta talk to my girl and see if she’s free.”
This bought him several beats of silence before, “Your girl?”
“The shit’s that gone down I had to focus on,” Joker explained.
“Right,” Linus said slowly. “Few weeks ago you rolled your bike to my garage tellin’ me you been around awhile and just got your shit sorted to make an approach, but no woman involved in that shit. Now you got one and she’s one you’d bring to Kam and Mrs. Heely?”
“Yeah,” Joker answered easily.
“Uh, son, maybe you don’t get this. You don’t bring just any woman to Kam and especially not Mrs. Heely. Those women are gonna pick her over like vultures. Nothin’ but the best for the kid they let into their hearts but lost then got back only very recently.”
That felt good, but still Joker shared, “Wouldn’t bring anything but the best to either of them, brother.”
Linus was again quiet before, “You sayin’ this is serious?”
“I’m sayin’ you meet her, you know I’d be a fool not to make it that way. And, Lie, I’m no fool. So I didn’t fuck around makin’ it that way.”
“Shee-it,” Linus pushed out. “You can say that again. It’s only been a coupla weeks.”
“Not like you, I know I got it good, I don’t wait a year to tag it as mine,” Joke gave him shit.
“Below the belt, bud,” Linus replied, a smile in his voice. “Now I gotta hope like fuck she’s off work. This I gotta see.”
“Goin’ to her now. I’ll ask. Text you if I can confirm and I’ll get in touch with Mrs. Heely,” Joker said.
“Right. Either way, ’spect I’ll see you soon.”
“You will, Lie. Tell Kam I said hey, and same to your kids.”
“You got it. Later, Car.”
“Later, Lie.”
They disconnected and Joker shoved his phone in his pocket before mounting his bike. He was riding to Carissa when he felt it ring. Riding, he didn’t grab it.
He was still riding when he felt it vibrate with a text.
At a red light, he took it out.
The missed call was Carissa.
The text was her too.
I need you home, sweetie.
He didn’t like that, the call and then a text and what that might say with all the shit she was swimming through.
But he liked the way she used the word home.
He sent a quick text back, Almost there.
Then he got his ass there.
He parked in the back and came through the back door to see her in the kitchen, Travis to her hip, her eyes on him, and her expression openly freaked.
He didn’t like that either. Not at all.
“Talk to me,” he ordered and it came out almost like a bark.
“Okay, I went to that place that Stacy told you to tell me gives good money and doesn’t mess you around on used jewelry.”
“Knew you were doin’ that today, Carrie,” he told her, and he did know. He just hoped
Stacy was right and they didn’t fuck his girl over because he was in the mood to have dinner and relax with his woman and her boy, not go out and teach some jeweler asshole a lesson with his fists.
“Well, before I went, I looked it up on the Internet. Checked to see what I should get, you know, on online auctions and other places, just in case he still tried to undercut me.”
“Right,” he bit out when she stopped talking.
“And they didn’t. They actually gave me better. It’s quality stuff and my engagement ring was three and a half carats. The tennis bracelet brought almost as much as the engagement ring. It was a lot, Carson. Far more than I expected. And they don’t do commission. He bought them right there.” She shook her head. “It’s enough to pay off my attorney bill and my credit card and get Travis some new clothes and have some left over to actually start a savings for when I might be able to go to school to be a stylist. I mean, I should have thought of doing this months ago.”
“None a’ this explains why you look freaked,” he pointed out.
“Well, I was excited,” she stated, bouncing Travis further up on her hip, which brought Joker’s attention to the kid and he saw belatedly that Travis had a ring with a duck head in his hand. The minute he got Joker’s attention, though, the ring was on the floor and he reached out to Joker with both arms, twisting to do so.
Carissa contained him but Joker didn’t make her do it for long. He strode forward and pulled the boy out of her arms and into his.
Travis reached up and latched onto his lip.
Joker ignored it and lifted his brows to Carissa.
She gave a start, her eyes on her son, and looked to Joker.
“I was excited,” she repeated.
“Said that,” he told her, and when he did, Travis made a noise, clearly enjoying the feel of Joker’s lip moving while he was latched on to it.
“So,” she went on immediately. “I went to the bank. I made a deposit. Started a savings account. Then I went to my old attorney to settle the bill.”
When she stopped and didn’t go on, he prompted, “And?”
“And… it was paid.”
Joker’s hold on Travis tightened just as Travis lost interest in his lip, let it go, and started to bang his hand against the base of Joker’s throat.
He looked down at him and muttered, “Be with you in a sec, kid.”
“Bah, lah, gah,” Travis replied.
“Gotta talk to your ma,” Joker told him.
“Bah, bah, dah!” Travis cried.
“Patience, son,” Joker advised.
“Gah!” Travis yelled on a throat slap.
Joker looked back at Carissa.
“Neiland,” he guessed quietly.
She nodded her head. “I asked. They confirmed. It wasn’t anonymous. He wanted me to know.”
Joker put his teeth to the back of his bottom lip, about to clip fuck but stopped himself just as Carissa kept talking.
“As you know, Angie said to keep the money he gave me Monday, use it, but keep track of it, what I used it for, and don’t go crazy. But this…”
She trailed off and he asked, “You call her about this?”
“Yes, right before I called you. She said it’s not my problem if he makes a decision to pay those fees. We didn’t request it. It was done by his own choice, so he can’t come after us or use it against us. And she thought it was a bit fishy that my old attorney accepted it without informing me, but payment is payment and everyone likes to get paid. Once paid, if he doesn’t get what he wants out of that gesture, Aaron can’t go after them to get it back. Since the request didn’t come from us and we didn’t do anything else to lean on him to do it, she also can’t see any way he can use it to get to me. But she’s wary.”
She had a right to be wary.
This was the beginning.
“He’s starting his game by tryin’ to buy his way back. It’s a faulty strategy,” he stated. “Straight up, he gave you that debt, Carrie. It’s his. Always been his. It’s never been yours. He’s not finally mannin’ up and accepting his responsibility for that fuck-up. He’s makin’ another play. But that’s not on you. He did what he did. Only thing you can do is move on without that liability that wasn’t yours in the first place. If it means you breathe easier financially, then good, ’cause you shouldn’t have had to take that hit in the first place.” He hefted Travis up a couple of inches and finished, “Done.”
“You think it’s that easy?” she asked.
“Why would it not be?” he asked back.
“Because nothing with him is ever that easy.”
Joker finally moved to her, and when he got there, he curled his hand around the side of her neck and bent close.
“You got two choices,” he began. “You can worry about this or you can let it be done. He’s got more to throw at you, we both know that. But no point in you makin’ something easy into somethin’ hard just by frettin’ about it bein’ easy.”
“That makes sense,” she muttered, her eyes drifting to her boy as her hand did the same to come up and rest on Travis’s back.
“Butterfly,” Joker called and got her attention. “He wants in. He’s startin’ that by tryin’ to make you think he’s sorry. I can see that play. That gets in there, he can build on that.”
“He won’t build on that,” she returned sharply.
Joker grinned.
She was his girl, straight up, no bullshit, and she wanted to make sure he knew it, even with her ex knocking on her door.
He liked it, but he was surprised as fuck he didn’t need it.
He knew he was in there. He knew why. He knew that was his place to be. Because he knew he deserved to be there.
And this was why he figured he didn’t lose it with her ex-jackhole. From the beginning, the way she was with her ex and the way she was with Joker, it wasn’t a struggle. It was actually easy to check it.
Tack had been right.
Knowing he’d end the day with his cock buried inside her, go to sleep with her weight resting against him, knowing she’d given him that just as he’d earned it, he could keep his cool, mainly because he didn’t want to jack it up by doing something stupid and lose any of that.
Not to mention, Carissa had demonstrated she had sass and not only didn’t take his shit but was capable of shoving it right back.
That didn’t mean the guy wasn’t irritating as fuck and Joker wasn’t concerned about what that asshole intended to put his Carrie through. It just meant Joker didn’t make matters worse for his girl by losing his shit.
He didn’t get into any of that with her.
He said, “Just statin’ his play.”
“I paid the attorneys one hundred and fifty dollars a month. I couldn’t afford it, but that’s the payment plan they would accept. That’s gonna mean a lot to me,” she declared. “And what stinks is, I’ll think of him when I’m paying my bills every month and don’t have to pay that.”
“You’ll think of him for a month, then you’ll quit doin’ it.”
“He’ll make me think of him other ways,” she said.
“Only in ways that irritate the crap outta you.”
“This is true,” she murmured, her eyes again sliding to her boy.
“Baby,” he called and she looked back to him. “It’s done. You got the power to believe that. So make it done.”
“Okay, I’ll make that done because I’m hungry and I’ve cooked tonight and it’s good stuff. But one more thing.”
“What?” he asked.
“Big Petey won’t accept money.”
Joker dropped his hand and leaned back. “Carrie, I told you—”
“I know what you said but that’s unacceptable. He’s refused now three times. So when he put his wallet on the counter yesterday, I put three hundred dollars in it. Today, when I went into the cupboard for some food for Travis, those bills were shoved between the jars.”
Joker started laughing.
“It’s not fun
ny,” she snapped.
“It is,” he replied, still laughing.
“It is not,” she returned.
He quit laughing (slowly) and gave it to her.
“Thirty years or less, Butterfly, you’ll be at a time in your life when your house is empty and you got time on your hands you wanna fill with what you like doin’. This boy,” he hefted up Travis again, “might be married, have kids, maybe need his ma. You step in, regular or just so he can take his woman out for a Blizzard, you gonna make him pay?”
Her face told him his point was made but she still retorted, “Big Petey isn’t my father.”
“Big Petey is everyone’s father,” Joker shot back. “He likes it like that. He’s lived a long time to build that respect. He’s earned it and he should get it. Give it to him.”
She again told him without words he got in there but that didn’t mean she didn’t push it.
“He barely knows me.”
“Love and care don’t come with time. They just come. My old neighbor I told you about, Linus, took one look at me and knew I needed a good man in my life. He didn’t step in after he spent years gettin’ to know me. The minute he had my attention, he asked me over to watch a game. I needed that so much, I didn’t make him wait years before I went over and watched that game. Growin’ up, I had two safe places. His house and any time I was with another neighbor a’ mine, Mrs. Heely. And she didn’t give what she had to give to me after takin’ years to get to know me either.”
He bent in again, holding her son, touching her only with his forehead to hers, and he finished.
“I know you give good. And I know you like how it feels when you give it. You were in his position to do good, you’d jump at it. Put your feet in his shoes. Feel what he feels when he gives to you. Then let Pete have this.”
She held his eyes from up close and he saw hers get bright.
Travis slapped his cheek.
He watched her eyes smile.
“Okay, sweetie,” she whispered.
He bent in to kiss her and got another smack from Travis, so he made it unfortunately brief.
When he pulled away, he asked, “What’re you gonna feed me?”
She grinned. “Carnitas.”