“You aren’t getting any younger,” Ally said.
Dear Lord.
“Just answer my question,” I said.
“What question?”
“Pregnancy test.”
“I think you have to miss a period. I’ll run down to Walgreen’s and look at one.”
Then off she went, luckily Walgreen’s was only a few blocks away.
“Tex, can you make me a skinny vanilla latte, please?” I asked.
“So you’re talkin’ to me again?” he asked.
“Just make me one!”
“Who’re you? The Man?”
“No, I’m The Woman who wants a vanilla latte!”
“Fine. Jeez. I’ll make you a latte. I’ll make it decaf so you’ll calm down.”
“If you make it decaf, you’re fired,” I said.
“Caffeine may not be good for the baby,” Tex replied.
That’s when I screamed, full-on-Nightmare-on-Elm-Street-scream-your-lungs-out.
The customers jumped and stared.
The bells over the door went. I stopped screaming and saw Eddie coming into the store.
He didn’t look happy.
In fact, he looked scary unhappy.
His mirrored shades were off and his dark eyes were intense.
My frustration at my crazy, fucked up life went out the window and I walked up to him.
“You okay?” he asked.
I felt my stomach pitch. He wasn’t talking about me screaming.
By the look of him, I was assuming something happened to someone I loved. Seeing as I was a cop’s daughter, this moment was always in the back of my mind. For me, especially coming from Eddie, it could be anyone, Lee, Dad, Malcolm, Hank or dozens of other guys who were friends of mine or Dad’s.
I opened my mouth to answer and I heard then saw the Ducati. It stopped in front of the store, Lee pushed down the stand and swung his leg off. He came inside.
His mouth was tight, his eyes were blank, his expression was grim.
He looked at me, then at Eddie, then back to me.
“You okay?” he asked.
“What the fuck is going on!” I shouted.
“She needs caffeine.” Tex said, handing me my latte.
Lee came closer to me, both he and Eddie were less than a foot away, crowding me in. Tex was still beside me and Duke had wandered over, feeling the vibe, and was standing close behind me.
Bad news was coming.
“Cherry Blackwell’s car exploded this morning,” Lee said.
I stared at him.
What the fuck?
“Jeez-us. She the loopy-loo you scrapped with last night?” Tex asked me.
I ignored Tex and said, “Please tell me she wasn’t in it.”
“She wasn’t in it,” Lee said.
I let out a breath and then took a sip of latte. Even in that tense situation, I noticed that the latte was divine.
“What happened?” I asked.
Eddie answered, “We don’t know. Car’s still too hot to get near it. They’re guessin’ she was four, five feet away when it went. She got hit with flying debris and she was burned by the fireball. She’s at Swedish Medical Center.”
“Is she okay?” I asked.
“No update yet,” Eddie said.
Jeez, I didn’t like Cherry. In fact, I hated her, but I also didn’t like the idea of her getting hit with flying debris from a car explosion. The only person I’d want that to happen to was Osama bin Laden but I would prefer for him to be in the car.
I looked at Lee, he was still looking grim. I realized that they may have parted badly but she had still been his girlfriend. Twice. I slipped my hand in his.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“Yeah,” he said, looking at me funny.
“She doesn’t understand,” Eddie said.
“Understand what?” I asked.
Then it hit me. Last night, I was rolling around in fried rice with Cherry, today she’d almost been blown up.
I looked at Eddie. “I have an alibi. Actually, I have two! And I don’t know anything about explosives.”
This wasn’t exactly true. Ally and I had famously set off a couple dozen bottle rockets in Nina Evans’s front yard after Nina had started a nasty rumor that Ally had herpes.
Still, bottle rockets and car bombs didn’t exactly compare.
“Yeah, she spent most of the night with me and the cats, eatin’ chips and drinkin’ moonshine. She wasn’t out of my sight until you came and got her,” Tex threw in, looking at Lee.
Eddie stared at Tex, some of the intensity going out of his eyes at the thought of me, Tex and the cats eating chips and drinking hooch.
“Darius told me that one of his guys was at a strip club last night and heard Coxy’s boy Gary talkin’ about your cat fight with Cherry,” Lee said.
This wasn’t interesting news. I figured I’d been a prime topic of conversation on police band for at least a week. I probably had my own code by now, Indy-666 or something.
Anyone could listen to police band.
“And?” I asked.
“And Coxy’s already gone out of his way to eliminate what he might consider your problems.”
I dropped Lee’s hand and took a step back. “You think Wilcox tried to kill Cherry… for me?”
Eddie answered again. “Too early to know. Cherry didn’t have a lot of friends but crisping her seems harsh retribution for bein’ a bitch.”
“This isn’t happening,” I said.
I was reeling. I didn’t know what to do, what to think.
“You guys want coffee?” Tex asked Lee and Eddie.
“Sure, triple shot cappuccino,” Eddie said.
“Yeah, Americano, black,” Lee said.
Tex ambled off to the espresso counter while I continued my silent meltdown searching the depths of my fried brain for Denial Zone.
Then Duke asked, his Sam Elliott voice low and serious, “Could we not talk about fuckin’ coffee and maybe talk about how you two badass motherfuckers are gonna protect Indy from this crazy fuck?”
I turned to look at him and noticed immediately that he was pissed.
Duke looked at Lee. “Isn’t it about fuckin’ time you quit fuckin’ around and took care of this fuckin’ guy?”
Uh-oh.
Duke wasn’t afraid to use the F-word but he only dosed his vocabulary liberally with it when he was close to losing it.
Lee looked at him. “I’m workin’ on it.”
Duke took a step forward. “Work harder.”
This was not good.
I knew, because I saw, that Lee could kick ass. Duke was no slouch. He might be an old guy but he also knew how to handle himself through a fuckload of practice.
I wasn’t sure how Lee would take an accusation of “fuckin’ around” and I didn’t want two people I loved to go head-to-head in my bookstore.
“Duke…” I said.
Duke looked at me and the look in his eye made me move closer to Lee.
“We don’t know when this fuckin’ lunatic is gonna lose his patience and turn on you. Bullets are flyin’, cars explodin’, dead bodies everywhere. This has got to fuckin’ stop. Now,” Duke said to me.
“He’s right,” Eddie agreed. “Indy needs to be protected. You got a safe house for her?”
“Yeah,” Lee answered.
Yikes!
“No! No, no, no,” I cried, beginning to panic. “I can’t go to a safe house. I can’t. I’d feel like a sitting duck.”
Lee’s arm came around me. “It won’t be for long.”
I pulled away from him. “No! I can’t do it. I’ll climb the walls. I swear, Lee, you lock me up and the minute I get out, I’m moving to Argentina.”
Either he didn’t believe me or he knew he could track me through the wilds of Argentina because he didn’t look like he was gonna cave.
“Lee, give me back the stun gun, I’ll carry it everywhere. Put a man on me. Anything, just don’t lock me up.”
&nbs
p; “I’d put a man on you but if we’re gonna take Coxy down I gotta keep my boys on target.”
This wasn’t good, this was like being grounded but without the tree out your window to climb down when your Dad was asleep. I hadn’t been grounded in twelve years, I forgot how much I hated it, hated being penned in, hated my freedom restricted. I couldn’t stand it.
Surprisingly, Eddie caved first.
“We’ll take turns playin’ bodyguard,” Eddie said, staring into my deer-caught-in-headlights eyes. “I’ll talk to Hank, Willie, Carl. I’m off-duty. I’ll take the first shift.”
Shit.
Out of the frying pan, into the fire.
This did not sound good.
Lee slowly turned to Eddie. “I’m not sure I like that idea.”
Eddie looked at Lee. “Get over it.”
They stared at each other and moments passed while testosterone permeated the air.
“Oh for fuck’s sake. She might be pregnant with your baby, Lee. She’s hardly gonna wander,” Duke said.
My mouth dropped open.
Eddie looked at me, his eyes moved down to my belly then back up to my face. Then he turned to Lee.
“That didn’t take long,” he said.
“I’m not pregnant,” I said, (perhaps wishful thinking).
Tex came up with the coffees and handed them around.
“All right, boys, get to work,” he said.
Eddie walked to the couch and sat down, putting one cowboy-booted ankle on the other knee, spreading an arm along the back of the couch and taking a sip of cappuccino. He was looking at me and grinning in a sexy way.
Great.
Lee snagged my neck and pulled me to him.
“You’re gonna be okay,” he said.
I nodded even though I didn’t believe him.
He kissed me and walked out.
Ally waved at Lee, who was getting on his bike as she walked in, and announced, “You have to miss a period, but I bought a couple pregnancy tests anyway, just in case.” And she waved around the boxes.
I looked at Eddie.
Eddie smiled.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Long-Lasting Reliability
I filled Ally in on the Cherry explosion and the reason for my new bodyguard.
Ally said, “There are a lot of things I imagined happening to her after she tried to trap Lee, that wasn’t one of them.”
Then, she put some Black Crowes in the CD player and turned up the volume.
Ally wasn’t one to reflect, she preferred rock ‘n’ roll.
More customers came in and luckily, we were busy enough to keep our minds off the latest disaster.
I was sitting behind the book counter, finishing an emergency order for coffee because if we continued at this rate, we’d run out by the end of the week, when my cell rang.
It was Dad.
“Hey Daddy-o,” I said.
“Hey, sweetie pie.”
His voice was soft and mushy. My Dad wasn’t a soft and mushy type of guy.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“Kitty Sue called. If it’s a boy, you gotta name him after your Grandpa Herbert. I promised him if your mother and I had a boy, we’d do it and we never got ‘round to it so it’s up to you.”
I was sitting frozen to the spot, like a statue.
“Indy?”
I stayed silent.
“Okay, you can use Herbert as a middle name.”
“I’m not pregnant!” I shouted and everyone looked at me.
“Then why’d Kitty Sue call me asking me to your baby shower? Though, I’m not into this co-ed baby shower shit. I’ll send a gift.”
“I’m not pregnant!” I repeated.
“You’re not?”
Man, this was embarrassing.
“I’ll call you later.”
I flipped the phone shut and glared at Ally. “You called Kitty Sue.”
“No I didn’t,” she replied.
Duke was edging to the door.
“Duke!” I yelled.
“Gotta go see a man about a…” he started.
“Stop right there! Did you call Kitty Sue?”
He turned to me. “Nope.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “Did you say anything to Dolores?”
He scratched under his bandanna. “I might have mentioned it.”
I flopped my head down on my crossed arms on the book counter.
My life was shit.
I looked up and in the general direction of where one of Lee’s hidden cameras had to be and talked direct to Command Headquarters.
“Lee! Your mother is planning a baby shower. Call her!”
I grabbed my purse, threw my phone in it, stormed around the counter and pointed at Eddie. “You! Macho man! Come with me,” and out the door I went.
I was flipping and flopping down the block, double time. Eddie caught up to me and grabbed a handful of my belt and the waistband of my jeans, forcing me to a stop.
“Hang on there, chica.”
He threw his arm tight around my neck and my front was pinned against his side. I started up again, walking like a crab for a few paces then his arm loosened and I could walk normally. Even so, I walked normally with his arm wrapped around my neck, his hand dangling down and my shoulder and part of my body tucked into him.
He had his mirrored shades on but I could tell he was scanning. I realized he was being watchful and the way we were walking made him the easier target. This made me feel warm in my belly. He also smelled good which helped that warmth to spread.
By the time we got to Walgreen’s and went inside I was in a little Eddie Daze.
See what I mean? Eddie didn’t need to sweet talk you or toss you a line, Eddie was just… Eddie. That in itself was potent stuff.
He dropped his arm and took off his shades when we went inside the drugstore and I shook off the daze.
I roamed the aisles, trying to remain focused on my task and thus ignore the cosmetics and candy aisles.
Then I found what I wanted and I came to a halt.
I turned to Eddie. “Okay, I’ve never done this. This is the guy’s department. What do I do? We need to get Lee’s size and we need industrial strength. Show me which ones to buy.”
Eddie looked at the display and looked at me. “You’re askin’ me to help you buy condoms for Lee?”
“Industrial strength condoms,” I reminded him.
Eddie stared at me like he was re-thinking his crush on me.
“Okay,” I said, trying to be helpful, “we’ll break it down. We’ll start with the size.”
He shook his head. “First, I’m a little worried you’re lookin’ to me to tell you Lee’s size. Lee es mi hermano, but we aren’t that close. Second, they don’t come in sizes.”
I couldn’t believe it, that couldn’t be true.
“You mean it’s one size fits all?” I asked.
He didn’t bother to answer.
“That’s impossible,” I said, and it was. It wasn’t like I’d seen millions of them but I knew they weren’t all one size.
He remained silent but his eyes got kinda scary.
Yikes.
“All righty then, let’s go on to the next category, strength, durability, that kind of thing.”
Eddie walked away.
My cell rang, I grabbed it and saw it was Lee.
“Where are you? The guys said you freaked out about a baby shower and took off with Eddie behind you,” Lee said by way of greeting.
“Your mother is planning a baby shower.”
“Where are you?”
“You have to call her.” I told him.
“Where are you?”
“Lee!”
“I’ll call her, where the fuck are you?”
“I’m at Walgreen’s with Eddie. I’m actually glad you called because Eddie is refusing to help. What kind of condoms do you use? And please, nothing colored or flavored or any of that crap. I want the ones that are known for l
ong-lasting reliability.”
Silence.
“Lee?”
I could swear that the mouthpiece was being covered on his phone.
“Lee!” I shouted.
“Let me get this straight,” he said and I could tell he was laughing, “you dragged Eddie to Walgreen’s to help pick out condoms for me?”
“Well, I didn’t know! I’m not the kind of girl who keeps condoms around. That’s the guy’s job and you said we were gonna have to use different precautions.”
“Did you tell Eddie the part about long-lasting reliability?”
Oh Lord.
“Forget it,” I said.
“Indy?” he called.
“What?” I snapped, kinda pissy.
“I love you.” He still had laughter in his voice and there was something very cool about him laughing and saying I love you at the same time.
He hung up before I could say anything.
I grabbed a smorgasbord of condoms, Lee could have a selection.
Eddie caught up with me while I was lost in the lip gloss section and pulled me away. I managed to snag a bottle of multi-vitamins (just in case) and several bars of watermelon taffy before Eddie marched me up to the counter.
I bought my seven boxes of condoms, six taffy sticks and my vitamins and then our little shopping expedition was over.
* * * * *
After we closed Fortnum’s, Eddie drove me and the Crossfire the one block to my house and parked it in the second space I owned behind the house, a space relegated to visitors.
I was pretty certain I was going to start hyperventilating at the idea of the visitor’s parking spot being the permanent residence of Lee’s Crossfire but I managed to tamp down the panic.
We walked through my backyard and Eddie took my keys and opened the door.
The minute I walked in, I knew something was wrong.
“Someone’s here,” I whispered to Eddie and put my Walgreen’s bag on the kitchen counter.
Eddie turned and looked at me. “No shit, there’s a television on.”
Okay, so maybe I wasn’t a natural-born detective with a keen sense of danger.
“Stay here, I’ll check it out,” he said, pulling a gun out of his waistband and walking into the dining room.
I followed him.
He turned to me. “Which part of ‘stay here’ didn’t you understand?”
“You’re not leaving me behind, I don’t like to get left behind. Sure, I get kidnapped and find dead bodies when I don’t stay where I’m supposed to be but I’m pretty certain it’d be worse if I stayed behind.”