To hear her say some of the same things I’m thinking right now is crazy. “I know exactly what you mean. Ever since Jessica, I’ve kept my emotions on lock-down. I’ve never spent much time with a woman until you. Normally I just…” I freeze trying to refrain from sounding like a complete asshole.
“Normally you just have sex and then get rid of them?” She fills in the blanks.
“Yeah…that makes me sound like a shallow fuck,” I admit.
She nods. “It does, but given what you’ve been through with your ex-wife, I understand why you’re like that. I don’t know what makes me so different, though.”
“In the bar when I first kissed you, I’ll admit I had every intention of sleeping with you and then walking away. I know that’s harsh, but it’s the truth. I saw you and I wanted you. I didn’t even care if Max was with you or not. I planned on stealing you away from him, taking you to my hotel and having my way with you. But Max threw a wrench in that plan with he dragged you away. I stood there for a second, debating whether to chase you down…”
“But?” she prods.
“Another chick threw herself willingly into my arms and latched her lips on mine, so I took the easy way out. I figured Max was your jealous boyfriend and if I went after you there would be a fight. As much as you probably don’t believe it, I try to avoid those at all costs. I, more than anyone, know how quickly a simple fight can escalate to the point where the law gets involved.”
“Is that why you didn’t hit Jackson back the other day?”
My nose tingles at the thought of Jackson sucker punching me. If things were different, I would’ve beat that little shit into the ground. “It is. When I was a kid, I fought all the time. I fought with my brother, other kids at school, whoever. All it took was someone to look at me wrong and I would go after them without a second thought. Spending time in jail, and then living on probation for a year, really opened my eyes and I realized that sometimes it’s better to just walk away.”
Holly shoves her hair back from her face. “She really screwed you up, didn’t she?”
I sigh. “She did, but I try to focus on the positive side of things. If I hadn’t gone through all the things I have in my life, I wouldn’t be here, right now, with you. This”—I squeeze her in my arms—“is amazing. You’re amazing. I can’t explain why, but I’m happy being with you.”
She snuggles into my chest. “Me too. All this time, I thought Jackson was who I wanted, but tonight, it’s like I saw his true colors. He’s not who I thought he was, but more importantly, lately he’s not the man that’s been on my mind all the time either.”
I rest my chin on her head as I think about just how she’s been on my mind too. “You’ve been thinking about me? Why didn’t you say anything? Since that day on the couch, all I’ve done is dream about you. I didn’t say anything to you, because you never mentioned it. You barely looked at me after that. I figured you regretted it and were doing your best to forget, which hurt.”
She pulls away so she can face me. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I felt confused and I had to take a step back from you. I’m not the kind of girl that sleeps around and I wasn’t sure I was ready for that with you yet. I felt a connection with you, and I’m pretty sure you felt it too, but part of me was still in love with Jackson. I had to sort out everything I was feeling for both of you.”
I tuck a strand behind her ear. “I guess I can understand that. You were with Jackson a long time. Are you sure things are really over between the two of you? I need to know now because when I fall in love, I fall hard. I don’t want you to give me yourself now, but then decide you still love him.”
I swallow as I wait on her answer, knowing exactly how dangerous it is to open up my heart to someone again. Something I swore to myself I’d never do again.
Holly touches my face with her fingers. “It’s hard to say this, but I’m over Jackson. I know now what we had wasn’t love. I mean, real love wouldn’t make you feel bad about yourself, or hurt you all the time, right? I guess what I’m trying to say is I’m still searching for the right guy.”
I bite the corner of my lower lip. “And you think that’s me?”
She shrugs. “I have no idea. I just want someone’s unconditional love—something that’s true.”
I thread my fingers through hers. “Everyone wants that.”
I don’t believe I’ve ever said a more true statement in my life. I had always been a hopeless romantic until Jessica crushed the idea of love for me. Opening myself up to someone isn’t something I believed would ever happen again—that is until Holly. There’s something about her that feels like home and is safe, and she makes me want to love someone again. Being with her is changing me.
Chapter 11
Radioactive
Holly
Trip tugs his cell phone out of his pocket and glances down at it. “It’s getting late. We should probably go in.”
I swing my legs off his lap and place my feet on the floor while grabbing his hand. “Come on. We can go to my room.”
A wicked grin spreads across his face. “Again? You’re going to kill me on our first night together. You really were deprived.”
I giggle and lead him towards the door, walking backwards in front of him. “I really was. Looks like we’re just going to have to keep at it until this craving goes away.”
He shakes his head and grabs me around the waist, pulling me against his body. “I don’t think it’s ever going to go away for me. I’m addicted. You’re stuck with me.”
I smile and grab a hold of his shirt. “I think I’m starting to like the sound of that.”
“You do, huh?” He kisses my lips. “Me too.”
I nod and start to open my mouth to tell him exactly how much I’m starting to like the idea of being with him when headlights shine through the windows. “Who is here this late?” I turn around and squint, trying to make out the make of the car that pulled up next to my house. When I recognize the car, my brow scrunches. “What in the world is Max doing here so late?”
“It’s after one in the morning. Does he make a habit of showing up in the middle of the night?” Trip asks as I lead him through the door.
I shake my head. “No. Never. Something must be wrong.”
My heart thuds in my chest as we get closer to the car and Max hasn’t attempted to get out. The engine still runs as I approach the driver’s side and peer into the window. Max is slumped over the steering wheel with his head resting on his arms.
I tap on the glass. “Max? Are you all right?” He doesn’t respond immediately, so I knock on the glass. “Max? Answer me. You’re starting to scare me.”
This time Max slowly pulls his head up and turns in my direction. I gasp and clutch my throat as Trip yanks the door open. “Jesus!”
Max’s face is swollen and covered in blood. There’s not a single inch of his face untouched. “Max? Oh my God. What happened? Are you okay? We should take you to the hospital.”
A million things rush through my mind while I wait on his answer. He obviously didn’t wreck his car, so something else horrible has happened to him.
Trip reaches in the car and shuts off the engine. “Can you walk? I think we should take you to the hospital, Max. You look like hell.”
“No,” Max rasps. “If I go to the hospital, they’ll want me to press charges.”
Trip leans in and wraps Max’s arm around his shoulders, helping him stand. “Who in the hell did this to you?”
Max’s bloodshot eyes cut to me. “Jackson.”
My mouth drops open and my hand rushes to cover it. “Jackson did this to you? Why?”
Max doesn’t answer me as Trip helps him inside the house. Trip deposits Max gently on the couch while my head continues to spin. Why would Jackson do this to my best friend? I thought he liked Max. They always seemed to get a long so well. Did he do this because he was angry at me?
Anger builds inside of me and I fight the urge to jump in my car and find Jac
kson myself. This isn’t right. He needs to be punished for what he’s done to Max. No one should be allowed to get away with something like this.
“Holly, can you get some towels and something to clean him up with? We need to know how bad this is. If he needs stitches, we have to take him to the hospital whether he likes it or not.”
Max sighs through his fat lip. “No hospitals.”
Trip shakes his head. “No promises, buddy.”
I run upstairs and grab some towels and then head back to the kitchen. The first aid kit under the sink is dusty. The last time we had to use this was when Grace showed up here stoned out of her mind with cuts all over her body. Dad freaked out and went to work, cleansing and covering all her wounds, yelling at her for coming around here like that. It was one of the only times I can clearly remember him raising his voice to her. For some reason, her showing up here bleeding all over the place pissed him off far more than when she shows up in her regular state, begging for drug money.
I wipe the dust off and carry the box into the living room where Trip is sitting on the coffee table across from Max. “You should tell her.”
I hand Trip the towels and the box. “Tell me what?”
Max shakes his head. “Nothing.”
Trip narrows his eyes at Max. “Don’t act like this isn’t a big deal. Either you tell her, or I will.”
Fear creeps down my spine as I sit down next to Max. The fact that Trip knows something about my best friend that I don’t can’t be good. I take Max’s hand and cradle it in my lap. “What is it? I thought we told each other everything?”
Tears fill his eyes and when he blinks they stream down his face. “Not this. I never wanted you to know this.”
My vision begins to blur with tears of my own and I take a ragged breath. “Please, Max. Tell me. I don’t like seeing you hurt.”
Max bursts into full-blown sobs and I instinctively wrap my arms around him and pull him into a hug. I glance over at Trip. His face is marred with concern. I stroke the back of Max’s head and mouth to Trip, “Tell me.”
Trip takes a deep breath and says, “This has been going on for a while. Jackson apparently saw fit to use Max here as a punching bag whenever he felt the need.”
My eyes widen. “For how long? And why am I just now finding out about this?”
Max pulls back and wipes his tender face gently. “I didn’t want to lose you, Holl. I knew you thought Jackson was some great guy and I couldn’t risk telling you that he liked to beat me up on a regular basis. I didn’t want to lose your friendship. You’re my only friend. It would’ve killed me if you took his side over mine and never spoke to me again.”
My heart cracks and I fight back my emotions to keep from bursting into a million tears. I’m such a terrible friend. If this is my chance to attempt to make this situation right, then I’ve got to take it.
“So you allowed him to continue to do this to you right under my nose and not say anything? Max, I would’ve dumped his ass and encouraged you to go to the police about all this,” I tell him firmly. “Please don’t ever be afraid to tell me the truth about something. I love you. You’re my best friend.”
“You say that now, but if I were to tell you about this a year ago when it started, would you have been so willing? He had you snowballed for so long. It was scary how much control he had over you.”
I take one of the towels from off the table and open the first aid kit to pull out some peroxide. I soak the corner of the towel and go to work on cleaning Max’s face. As much as I hate to admit it, Max is right. It’s hard for me to believe this is real when I have the blatant proof right in front of my eyes. I can’t imagine how difficult it would’ve been for me to fathom my sweet, loving boyfriend being such a monster. But there’s no point in admitting that. It won’t help anyone to worry about anything other than the here and now.
Max winces as I clean his split lip. “I’m sorry this happened to you. It wasn’t because of me, was it?”
He frowns. “When you called and told Trip that Jackson just left you stranded, something snapped in me. I had to confront him, so I set out to find him and tell him what a piece of shit I think he is. He can treat me like shit all he wants, but not you, Holl. You don’t deserve that.”
A tear falls down my cheek and I shake my head. “Neither do you. We should go to the police. We can’t let him get away with this.”
“I don’t want people to know. I’m ashamed I allowed him to bully me for such a long time. Plus, if I go, I’ll have to give the details. Everyone—my parents—will know that I’m…”
I pat Max’s leg. “I’ll be right by your side. You won’t be alone. No one is going to love you any less when they find out you’re gay.”
“And I’ll go with you,” Trip adds beside me. “You shouldn’t let this get swept under the rug, man. It’s time to fight back and stop being that asshole’s punching bag.”
I finish wiping up Max’s face and he leans his head back and closes his eyes. He’s struggling. I know more than anyone how hard coming out to the world will be for him. Turning Jackson in for what he’s done will get not only everyone in this town involved, but the press too. A star motocross rider assaulting a gay man will make headlines for sure. I can’t imagine how hard this must be for him.
Max takes a deep breath and then opens his eyes. “I guess it’s time I stop hiding who I really am.”
I grab his hand and squeeze it. “You’re making the right choice. Let’s go.”
TRIP
Inside the police station, Officer Jones stares me down for a long moment before turning his attention back to Max. It’s the tattoos that make them all nervous. The artwork on both my arms tends to have that affect on some people. I stand behind Max while he works on filing a police report and applies for a restraining order against Jackson. Holly is right by his side, just like she promised.
“So tell me, Mr. Moore, where did the assault take place?” the heavy-set officer asks Max.
Max runs his hand through his brown hair. “It occurred on the street outside of Jackson Cruze’s house.”
The cop twists his lip, making his mustache crooked. “You said you drove yourself away from the scene. What were your intentions when going to Mr. Cruze’s residence?”
Max shuffles his feet. “They were to tell him off, I guess.”
The office nods and writes a couple notes down. “So you went over there with a preconceived plan to start trouble with your assailant?”
Max shakes his head. “No, I didn’t. He hurt my best friend and put her in danger. I had to confront him about that. He couldn’t just keep getting away with hurting her.”
“Is this young lady whom you’re referring to?”
“Yes.”
He eyes Holly and returns his gaze back to Max. “Was she involved with Mr. Cruze?”
“Yes, but I don’t see what that has to do with this,” Max replies.
The officer sighs and sets his paper down. “This appears to be a domestic dispute over this girl. My advice to you, son, is to not get involved in other people’s business—even if you are interested in pursuing the lady yourself.”
Holly shakes her head. “It isn’t like that, officer. Max and I are best friends. There’s nothing going on between us.”
The cop chuckles to himself. “You might want to let Mr. Moore know that—looks like he took quite the beating defending your honor.”
Holly folds her arms across her chest. “I’m glad you think that someone like Jackson beating up my gay best friend is amusing. I’m sure the media would love to know about the cop that didn’t take the matter seriously, especially since Jackson is sort of a celebrity.”
I grin as I listen to my girl give the cop what for. I love that she’s feisty enough to stand up for herself. Of course I’ll step in anytime she needs me, but she’s doing a pretty damn good job of handling the situation herself.
The chunky cop clears his throat. “Just hold on, Miss. I never once imp
lied this wasn’t a serious matter.”
“But you did when you were insinuating that we were just a bunch of young people caught up in a silly love triangle, which I promise you isn’t the case. Jackson Cruze is an arrogant jackass who believes he can get away with anything. He’s been picking on my friend for some time now, and it has to end. I had to practically drag Max down here. Look at his face. He got the crap kicked out of him and he was afraid to come to you people for help because he didn’t want to be judged. We get him here, and not only do you judge who he is and what he stands for, but you don’t take him seriously. You were about to blow him off, weren’t you?”
Officer Jones holds up his hands, attempting to calm Holly down. “I’m sorry if I came across that way. Believe me, this is a serious matter and we’ll get right on this. I promise you. We take hate crimes very seriously.”
“Good,” she replies. “Now let’s get back to allowing my friend to press charges against Jackson. He needs to know he’s not above the law.”
I remain silent the entire time. It’s good to know I have a woman who can defend herself. She’ll need to be tough, especially when it comes to dealing with our crazy fans. Those women go a little batty sometimes. Both Lanie and Aubrey both have had their fair share of run-ins with them and it wasn’t pretty, so I’m sure Holly will face that too.
Once everything is completed, we make our way out to the parking lot. Holly turns to Max and wraps her arms around him. “I’m so proud of you.”
He squeezes her against him. “It felt good to do that, like a weight has been lifted off me. Thank you for encouraging me.”
“You’re welcome,” she says as she pulls back. “Go home and get some rest. It’s nearly dawn, so you’ll have to explain everything to your parents soon.”
Max nods. “It’s time they knew the real me.” His gaze cuts to me. “Thank you, Trip.”
I raise my eyebrows. “Me? I didn’t do anything.”
“Yes, you did. You came into my best friend’s life and changed us both.” He smiles and then winces and touches his tongue to his split lip. “See you guys later.”