Against my will, Leah and Taylor dragged me closer to the stage. It took some effort, weaving and bumping into bodies during the process. That was how I found myself surrounded by the deep throb of the bass, masking my ignored cries of protest. I had no idea where Nick and Aaron had disappeared. During our forty-five minute drive back into Oakland, Nick made it clear he had little interest in “babysitting” us. I had frowned at the insult, but couldn’t agree more. The concert, held inside a popular arena, had been in full swing for an hour. The lead singer hollered into the microphone as the band broke into a new song.
“How’s everybody doing?”
The crowd roared and cheered, appearing as black-and-white photographic blurs with each burst of the strobe lights. The band kicked it up a notch, playing their number one hit and causing frenzy. All around me, an eager swarm of bodies knocked into each other, jumping up and down and dancing to the upbeat tempo. I threw my arms up to my face, shielding myself from elbows and sweaty bodies jostling into me. Strong arms grabbed me from behind, wrapping around my waist and pulling me close to the rhythm of his body.
“Get—off me!” I demanded in disgust, struggling to twist away. He held me tighter, his body meshed up against mine. I threw an elbow into his side. He grunted, but this only seemed to fuel him. He laughed in my ear, pulling my body tighter against him.
“You heard her. Move it!” Whoever was behind me was yanked away from my back. I stumbled forward. A hand gripped my arm, steadying me. I looked up to see Aaron standing at my side. His height hovered over the crowd.
“You ok?” he had to yell, still holding my arm.
I nodded. My eyes searched the crowd for my sisters, who seemed to have drifted with the current of bouncing fans. The concert became like an ocean, the waves of people moving up and down, blocking my view and threatening to pull me under. On my tiptoes, I found Leah pinned between two much older guys. She, too, struggled to free herself. We had evidently underestimated the vigor of this concert.
“Can you help her?” I had to yell to Aaron. He paved the way without hesitation. In less than a minute, he reached Leah’s side. I couldn’t hear their words, but the brief altercation escalated to one guy shoving Aaron. Aaron shoved him back, knocking the guy to the ground. The second guy with thick biceps swung at Aaron’s head. Aaron ducked, landing an uppercut to the guy’s jaw. His head snapped back as he grunted.
The crowd cheered and taunted, circling around and making them the center of attention. Leah tugged at Aaron’s arm, trying to pull him away from the fight. The first guy rose to his feet, fists raised. He stared hard at Aaron. The other guy who had taken the hit massaged his jaw. He stepped closer. Aaron shielded Leah with his body, pushing her back into the crowd with one arm, while he kept his eyes on his opponents.
Two burly men in black T-shirts intervened. One grabbed Aaron by the collar of his polo and shoved him forwards. The other security guard directed the two guys who started the trouble, herding them forcefully towards the exit.
I had made my way to Aaron by now and heard him grumble, “Oh, come on…” I cringed, instantly feeling bad that Aaron was being kicked out for defending us.
As the band’s hit number came to an end, the lead singer signaled to his band before speaking into the microphone. “How about a little love for you romantics out there?” Some of the crowd booed as the strobe lights came to a halt and the band transitioned to one of their slow, less popular love songs. However, the boos quickly blended with squealing from enthused females. The lead’s warm, low voice emerged from the speakers, singing a calm melody with the keyboard. In spite of the momentary distress, the crowd submitted to the change in mood. Couples found each other, swaying together to the music.
Leah and Taylor stood at my side. “What do we do?” Leah asked, both she and Taylor watching the last of Aaron’s form before he was nudged out the door. They also glanced back with longing at the stage. I looked around for Nick but didn’t see him.
“Just stay together,” I told my sisters, “and enjoy the concert. You guys deserve it. I’ll be back.” I pressed through the gentler crowd, making my exit.
Stepping outside, I looked around the vast parking lot surrounding the arena, but I didn’t see him. I held my cell phone uselessly in my hands, realizing I didn’t have his number. Or Nick’s, for that matter—and I didn’t want to call Dad and alarm him. I thought maybe Aaron had walked to the car but then remembered Nick had the keys… but maybe Aaron knew we would look for him there. Starting my brisk walk, I passed the endless rows of cars. I rubbed my arms against the cold, wishing I hadn’t left my jacket in the car. Despite Northern California’s winter feeling significantly warmer than December in Portland, the jacket would have been nice. My pace quickened.
“I see how it is,” Aaron’s voice interrupted the quiet night.
I jumped, turning around and punching his arm instinctively. He had been walking behind me, and I hadn’t even known it. “You scared me!” Aaron glanced down at his bicep, almost laughing at my attempt to hurt him. He folded his arms with his chest puffed out.
“First, I heroically save your life,” he said, “and then you send me into a brawl. Now I catch you sneaking away from it all.” His face reflected disapproval. “Are you trying to get back at me for something?”
I, too, crossed my arms, mimicking his stance. “First of all,” I emphasized, “I wouldn’t exactly classify your help as ‘saving my life’. Calling it ‘heroic’ might even be a stretch. Secondly, that brawl was nothing short of a cat-fight.”
Aaron threw up his hands in exasperation, shaking his head with a laugh. “You gotta be kidding me!”
I let out a laugh of my own, so he knew I was joking. “Sorry about that. I appreciate your help with both my sister and me. How’s your hand?” I asked, catching sight of his red knuckles.
He flexed his fingers with a shrug. “It’s fine. I didn’t hit him that hard.”
Catching a spark of excitement in his eyes, I accused, “You loved it.” Aaron grinned, his face lighting up.
“Yeah, maybe I did. Harmless fun!”
Glancing back at the concert in the distance, I commented, “I’m not so sure the guy you hit found it so harmless, but yeah, it could have been worse.” I shivered against the cold.
Aaron seemed to noticed. “Well, you have a choice to make. Option one: you can ditch me and go back into the concert—”
I made a face and shook my head. “I was getting tired of the crowd anyway.”
Aaron nodded. “Which leads to option two: do you want to grab something to eat?” He pointed to the fast food chains down the street.
“Sure, I could eat—”
“Or,” Aaron interrupted. “A third option: I could teach you self-defense.”
I raised an eyebrow. “What?”
“Self-defense. Considering how long it took you to notice I was following you, you’re going to need it when you inevitably get mugged.”
I let out a sound of derision. “Oh, please.”
Aaron shrugged. “I have four little sisters. I wouldn’t want any of them walking alone at night without knowing how to protect themselves.”
He waited, as if giving me time to consider his offer. I let out a humored sound. “How about we just start with food and see what happens.”
Ten minutes later, we both had burgers in our hands. Taking a bite, I waited for Aaron to finish texting Nick. After reading a follow up from Nick, he made a face.
“What?” I asked, wiping my face with a napkin.
“Oh, Nick’s just pissed because he’s ‘stuck at the concert babysitting’. He found your sisters, so I told him to stay close. He’ll get over it.”
“He gets to listen to Forever Delinquent. I’d hardly consider that babysitting.”
Aaron lifted his shoulders in dismissal and took a huge bite of his burger. “So, not to get too personal, but what’s the deal with your parents? Nick doesn’t say much when I ask him
about it.”
I put my burger down as my mind flipped through fragmented, unpleasant memories. Getting personal was not usually on my agenda, but I guess I owed Aaron a decent conversation since it was kind of my fault he was kicked out. Still, I must have been scowling because Aaron offered to take back the question.
“It’s ok,” I said. “Long story short, Dad had an affair a few years ago with some woman from work.”
“Oh, man. That had to suck.”
I grimaced in agreement.
“Your dad’s a writer or something… did I get that right?”
“He’s an editor, but he’s also a writer on the side.”
Aaron remained quiet, like he was waiting for me to continue speaking. I picked at my burger, drawn into the memories. “Sometimes Dad would lock himself in his den for hours, even on the weekends, with the excuse that he had a writing epiphany. Mom would get so fed up, especially when she’d just cooked dinner and wanted all of us at the table. Then one summer—just before I turned thirteen—Dad started working later hours at his office with the excuse that he was slammed with deadlines.” I paused, playing with the napkin that I’d ripped to pieces as I spoke. “Turns out, he was hooking up with a co-worker.”
“Man, I can’t even imagine,” Aaron commented. “My parents hardly ever fight.”
I raised an eyebrow. He had to be joking.
“No, I’m being honest,” he said. “Or if they used to, it wasn’t in front of us.”
“How lucky for you…”
“I’m not bragging about it—”
“Mmm… you’re kind of rubbing it in.”
“No, I’m not,” he continued. “I just can’t relate that’s all.”
That’s nothing new, I thought. But like with Shane and everyone else, it wasn’t his fault. Our experiences were just different. And he was lucky that he couldn’t relate.
“Anyway,” I continued, wanting to move past the pity-card, “Dad’s conscience got the better of him, and he told Mom about the affair at the end of the summer. After their big blow-up, he chose to leave. He rented an apartment or something. Then a couple months later, Dad started hanging around again, like he was trying to make it work with Mom.” I paused, still able to hear Mom screaming at him on far too many nights to number. “But it was too late. Mom wanted nothing to do with him—said it was the ‘catalyst to the inevitable’. That next summer, just before my freshman year, we moved to Portland.”
“Why all the way to Portland?” Aaron asked.
“Mom has some relatives who help out from time to time.”
“You must have been furious with your dad,” Aaron guessed.
“Yeah, you could say that.” I glanced at my phone in thought. My sisters and I hardly saw him that first year after my parents separated. Due to joint custody, Dad was entitled to more visits but he didn’t want to force us. He hoped we’d visit more than we did. Leah and Taylor made a couple weekend trips without me, but I couldn’t get past the hurt of his decision to cheat on Mom and then leave us like that.
Aaron seemed about to speak, so I stood up and gathered our trash, putting a not-so-subtle end to the conversation. It was a topic I avoided thinking about, let alone talking about. Fortunately, I didn’t have to worry about our discussion moving forward. By the time I turned around, two girls had stopped to chat with Aaron, one of them sticking her butt out as she leaned on the table. Aaron spoke to them with ease, his naturally outgoing personality carrying the conversation. I could almost hear the flirtatious conversation resonating from his white smile.
The scenario reminded me of Shane and I couldn’t help feeling sad about it, even though I knew our break up was the right thing. I shrugged inside, relieved for the interruption. Returning to the table, I interrupted the girl’s playful words.
“Hey, the concert’s about over. I’m gonna head back and find my sisters. Why don’t you text Nick and meet us back at the car.”
Aaron stood up. “Nah, I’m coming with you. We never did get around to the self-defense part.”
“And… we’re not going to. It’s ok, really,” I said, stepping towards the door. “Relax, I’m not going to get mugged. The arena is right there.” I jerked my thumb, pointing behind me. It really wasn’t a long walk. Aaron looked like he was about to protest. “I could use the alone time,” I clarified. It wasn’t in my nature to speak so openly, and I needed a break. Besides, he had company.
Aaron furrowed his eyebrows but conceded. “Ok, I’ll see you soon.” I felt his eyes follow me out the door. I used the walk to breathe in the fresh air, allowing the cool winter to chase away any negative childhood feelings resurfacing from my conversation. I was almost an adult now. It shouldn’t still bother me… I decided I wouldn’t let it bother me.