Chapter Eight
Jerry turned in the first set of marks to the office before heading to the exam room to supervise the Grade 12 Chemistry exam. Miriam had come over by herself to look after Michelle because Rose was under the weather. Jerry was over the moon at how well Michelle got along with Miriam.
It was almost painfully poignant to watch the two of them waving goodbye to him from the porch as he left for school. He wanted this every morning. Well, he had the appointment tomorrow.
As it was another rainy day, Miriam busied herself with cleaning the kitchen. There were a lot of cupboards to wash and the table needed something, a tablecloth or place mats. She checked her thoughts and reminded herself that this was not her house so she was not to let herself get her hopes up. Yet.
Michelle provided all the help that a four year old could. Which meant that Miriam had to wash the table three times and wash the floor twice in a couple of places where Michelle had spilled things transferring them either to or from the table. But nothing was broken in the process and Michelle was having fun slipping and sliding in the soapy water on the linoleum floor.
Jerry called Rose's at lunch to see how things were going, but mostly to hear Miriam's voice. Rose said that Miriam was over at his place looking after Michelle. So he called home and Michelle answered on the third ring.
"Hi, squirt."
"Hi, Daddy."
"Is Miriam there? Can I speak with her?"
Jerry heard a hollow thunk as the handset was dropped on the floor. There were sounds of running and Michelle yelling "Mireeyum! The phone's for you-oo!"
There was a sound of creaking boards and then the handset being picked up, "Âllo?"
"Hi Miriam, it's Jerry."
Miriam felt a warmth suffuse her. "Jerry. How are you?"
"I'm fine. I just wanted to hear your voice." Miriam leaned against the wall, very pleased.
"It's going very well. I was thinking about you, too."
Jerry felt his contentment start to relax him. "How has Mitchie been? And have you checked on Rose?"
"Michelle was very good. She helped me clean the kitchen this morning."
"You didn't have to do that."
"I wanted to. I like to keep busy."
"Thank you, then."
"You're welcome. We haven't checked on Rose yet, but I was going to visit her soon. She may want me to take her some lunch."
"You should go do that then."
"I will. It was good to hear your voice, too, Jerry."
"See you tonight. Leave a message with the office if you need me to get anything."
"I will."
"Good bye."
"Good bye." Neither of them wanted to end the call, but Jerry said good bye again and hung up. Jerry laughed at himself. He was behaving like one of his love struck students.
Jerry ate his reheated kafta and potatoes, bringing another wistful sigh and the memory of Miriam looking at home in the kitchen. Shaking his head, he grabbed another cup of staff room coffee and dove into the pile of marking with his mind clearer for having called home.
Rose was having tea in her kitchen, looking pretty chipper. "Hi you two. Did you have a good morning?"
"Mireeyum let me help wash the kitchen floor."
"That sounds like a good thing to do."
Miriam looked at Rose and asked "Are you better?"
"I'm much better, thanks. I think I just needed some extra sleep. With you here it was easy to listen to my body for a change."
"I'm happy I could help."
Miriam fixed some sandwiches and heated some leftover cabbage soup for herself and Rose. They sat companionably for a while and then Rose offered to read to Michelle. The rest of the afternoon passed fairly quickly.
Jerry got home around four and dropped in at Rose's to let them know he was home. Rose told him in no uncertain terms that he was having supper at her place and to go home and get that marking finished. For the Grade 12 exam he'd made sure it was mostly set answers so he didn't have to spend a lot of time analyzing processes or reading essays to assign the marks. He finished just before six and put everything away in his messenger bag. He would transfer the marks to the report sheets after Michelle went to bed.
Supper was one of Rose's extra thick fish and seafood chowders with fresh bread. He and Jack cleared and washed the dishes while he listened to Jack go on about needing to install sidewalks along Conrad Road.
After supper, the three of them walked down to Gert's store to try to tire Michelle out. She turned on the charm and Jerry bought her a Popsicle.
They ended the evening watching one of Michelle's movies with Miriam snuggled against him and Michelle climbing on and off his or Miriam’s lap for a series of micro cuddles.
As Miriam was leaving for Rose's, Jerry gathered her in a hug and said "Thank you for everything today."
Miriam looked up with her eyes big and luminous. "It was my pleasure." She reached up to put her hands around his neck. "Do you think we could try another kiss?"
"That would be my pleasure," replied Jerry as he brought his head down to hers. Miriam made some soft noises and melted against him.
"No, it was my pleasure," she said as she broke the kiss. "Good night, Jerry."
"Good night, Miriam." He watched her until she passed out of sight just past Jan's house.
Jerry finished transferring the marks to the report card data sheet. He checked it a couple of times to make sure he put all the right marks against the right students.
He said his devotions then fell into bed. It was hard not to think of Miriam and her kisses. He said some more prayers and rolled over to try to sleep. He lay awake for a long while with memories of Miriam rolling around in his head.
Miriam bustled around Rose's kitchen after she got back from Jerry's tidying things that were already where they were supposed to be.
"Sit down, girl, you're making me tense." Rose spoke to her from the living room.
Miriam grabbed her tea and went to sit with Rose. "I'm falling in love with Jerry, Rose."
Rose looked tenderly at her. "He's a good man, dear. So what's the problem?"
"Many things. I'm not sure I'll be able to stay in Canada. I'm scared that if he divorces Annabelle but loses Michelle he'll blame me. And I want to be able to earn my way."
"And it's your first time being in love with someone and you don't know what to do about it."
Miriam looked up at Rose and nodded nervously.
Rose continued, "The first things you mentioned will take care of themselves. I think Jerry is wrong about how hard Annabelle will fight for custody of Mitchie. You'll find out very soon if your refugee claim will be accepted. Jane Wilson thought it was very clear cut when I spoke to her Monday. After that you'll have at least a temporary work permit and with your experience and degree it won't be long before you find work. Which leaves the last thing, being in love."
Miriam took a deep breath. "It feels so right to be with him…and Michelle. When he kisses me I feel that he and I are alone in the world and I don't ever want him to stop. It's so hard not to think about him all the time."
Rose smiled wistfully. "That's what I felt about my Jack. He was so handsome that all of the really pretty girls wanted to be with him. When he picked me I was so surprised that I almost didn't believe him that it was me he wanted."
"He convinced you somehow."
"It was how he looked at me. I knew that there was a special, beautiful woman he was looking at, even if my mirror showed me something else. I wanted to look at myself in Jack's eyes everyday and ignore that mirror on the wall." Rose paused. "Jerry looks at you like that."
"I know. That is why I said yes when he asked if he could court me."
"Michelle likes you a lot too."
"She is precious and she is so much a part of Jerry that I can’t truly love him if I don’t also love Michelle, which I do. You and Jerry have done a wonderful job with her."
"Thank you. So do you want some advice
or not?" Rose asked seriously.
"Yes. I think so." Miriam sipped her tea.
"Enjoy this time together. Don't look for work until Jerry has to start preparing for the new school year. Take it slowly with each other and let Jerry know how you feel, good and bad. You haven't had anyone you can really trust to talk to in a long time, so it will feel scary, but you have to trust Jerry if things are going to work out between you."
"I know, but it's hard to let go. No men in my family, except my father, were ever interested in what I had to say or what my feelings were."
"Jerry has some of the same problems with trusting people that you do, dear. Annabelle is his only real experience with women who aren't family, except for what little he told me about you from Mac. Annabelle was never that interested in him or his feelings. And he couldn’t let himself discuss the really important things with you. Maybe he held back because he knew that you were going away. "
"I hope I can keep my hands off that woman when she shows up to visit Michelle."
"That's not a very Christian attitude, my dear. Understandable, though."
"No, I suppose it isn't. I will have to pray for forgiveness. Thank you for listening."
"Not a problem, my dear. You go get some sleep and remember what you look like in Jerry's eyes. Good night, Miriam."
"Good night, Rose"
Miriam put on the girl's nightgown again and thought that she really needed a job so that she could contribute. It wasn’t comfortable receiving all of this charity from Rose and Jerry. But she had no choice really, except returning to Islam and Rafiq which was no choice at all.
She said a long series of prayers ending with a request for forgiveness. Then she replayed the evening. Tonight’s kiss was better than Sunday’s, but it was Jerry looking at her with both love and desire in his eyes that made her feel special. This was happening very quickly but there was a sense of wholeness and peace that she felt whenever she thought of Jerry, like he was the missing piece of her jigsaw puzzle. She fell quickly into a contented sleep.