Read SOAP OPERA UNCENSORED: ISSUE 9 Page 4

since I compared Carlivati to the late, great Douglas Marland and dubbed him a “Soap God,” the naysayers are finally seeing what I saw five years ago. As they say, “better late than never.”

  But it’s not over for the dream team: The miracle workers are about to embark on their greatest challenge by assuming the Herculean task of resurrecting the worst show on air, GH, next month — the show that was always favoured over One Life.

  Somewhere Shakespeare is smirking. Oh, the irony.

  2. SUSAN LUCCI, ALL MY CHILDREN

  Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. This past year, Emmy winner Susan Lucci learned this valuable life lesson. When rumours of AMC’s impending demise set international headlines ablaze, ABC promised Lucci the show was not being axed while she was on a book tour for her lovely memoir, All My Life (even going so far as showing her financial records to prove the show was financially viable). Always the team player, La Lucci denied the rumours to every media outlet. A few weeks later, ABC cancelled AMC. Refusing to play the part of a corporate patsy ever again, Lucci channelled Erica Kane and became a vocal advocate against ABC/Disney and Brian Frons with yours truly in a bombastic TVGuide.ca interview. Finally free of her corporate shackles, Lucci was on fire like never before speaking out for soap fans and Erica Kane’s creator, soap legend Agnes Nixon.

  But that wasn’t all: On-screen, Lucci defied clichés when she tackled a dual role to critical raves: warped psycho fan, Jane and La Erica Kane herself. And in AMC’s final episode, Lucci brought Erica full circle when her love life once again interfered with her obsession with fame and fortune. Because of these new artistic accomplishments, Lucci may just earn her last Emmy nomination for Outstanding Lead Actress next year.

  In addition, off-screen the superstar was also feted by Oprah Winfrey herself on the queen’s titular talk show in its final season, appeared on The View as a guest co-host during an AMC tribute episode, discussed the possibility of joining Desperate Housewives, and co-starred on hit cable shows, Hot In Cleveland and Army Wives.

  Frankly, Susan, we do give a damn!

  3. TREVOR ST. JOHN AND ROGER HOWARTH, ONE LIFE TO LIVE

  “Me against my brother; my brother and me against my cousin; Me, my brother, and my cousin against the stranger.” That Arabic saying perfectly sums up the magic of One Life’s brilliant and riveting Two Todds storyline this past year. Because what’s better than one Todd Manning? Two Todd Mannings, of course!

  Ever since As The World Turns was cancelled, it was long rumoured Emmy winner Roger Howarth would reclaim his role as Todd on One Life, but many fans were worried his arrival would mean fan and critical fave Trevor St. John would lose the signature role he re-imagined so effortlessly when his predecessor bolted ABC and joined its rival soap.

  Well, luckily it turned out we had nothing to worry about when it was revealed that St. John was actually Todd’s brainwashed man-child twin, Victor Jr.. Together, the acting dynamos proved to be one of this year’s most inspired, dysfunctional and infectious duos. Sigmund Freud saw the sibling relationship as an extension of the Oedipus complex, where brothers were in competition for their mother's attention and sisters for their father's. And one could easily apply that theory to Victor and Todd, especially once head writer Ron Carlivati dropped another bombshell: their psycho mama, presumed dead Irene Manning, was alive and responsible for kidnapping Todd and brainwashing Victor and giving him his brother’s face in order to steal Victor Lord’s fortune (did you get all of that?)! The epic short story was part Cain and Abel, Richard III, and King Lear. My only criticism? Sadly, this heart-stopping storyline didn’t last long. The electric St. John opted to leave the series a couple of months later. But it was sure worth the ride —and retcon. Hopefully, this isn’t the last we’ve seen of the best sibling rivalries we’ve been lucky to be engrossed in because we have a hunch Victor is still alive. If not, his unborn child will surely seek justice.

  4. MICHAEL MUHNEY, THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS

  Everyone knows not to mess with Adam Newman. But in 2011, fans and the industry quickly learned Mensa member Michael Muhney doesn’t play, either. Like many of us in the industry, Muhney was justifiably infuriated over the unfair Daytime Emmy Awards nomination system. But Muhney didn’t just talk the talk, he strutted the walk and actually did something instead of complaining. The accidental activist and ambassador hightailed it to NATAS, the press and demanded change, ASAP. Yep, it took a mainstream actor and soap newcomer to change what no one could in the past 20 years in about four months. Victor Newman would be proud. Just call him: The Great Michael Muhney.

  On-screen, Muhney, who is considered one of the best recasts in the show’s history, continued to make waves — and surf them all at the same time —despite having to sell some really bad writing. But it was his high-wire performance at the beginning of this year that really stood out. The former Veronica Mars star decimated the CBS studios to pieces with his electric yet earnest talent when Adam literally crashed Sharon’s funeral and ripped every hypocrite in Genoa City a new one. It was what soap opera and acting is all about. With Muhney, nothing is phoney, nothing unfelt, unearned. You don’t just watch Muhney, you live and breath it with him. Oh, and the kid has hair to spare!

  Wouldn’t it be sweet justice Muhney if the actor were rewarded for implementing the groundbreaking changes at NATAS with an Emmy of his own?

  5. MELODY THOMAS SCOTT, THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS

  Burp! Despite being off the Y&R canvas for six months, the veteran film and TV actress nailed every single performance as Nikki was awash in booze, regret, and anger. Depending on whom you believe, Scott was either fired without being told or she was asked to take a pay cut and she refused (that’s what my sources still attest — and I believe them). Strategically, Scott took to Twitter and rallied her fans (about 14 K), who campaigned for Scott to return. In the end, she’s back, and hasn’t missed a beat. And she has never looked better or sexier! Long live, Nikki!

  6. ILENE KRISTEN, ONE LIFE TO LIVE

  It was the scream heard around the world. As bereft Roxy learned of her beloved soap, Fraternity Row’s cancellation, fans recalled their own horror when One Life and AMC were cancelled this past April. One of the best character actresses working today — and a daytime-TV treasure — the usually underrated and back-burnered Kristen is front and center where she belongs. You go, girl! As Roxy said recently, “It’s not over until the cat lady sings.” Did you hear that “empty suits?”

  7. REBECCA HERBST, GENERAL HOSPITAL

  Don’t mess with the GH fans, people! When ABC announced that it was firing one of its most popular heroines in its history, livid fans quickly mobilized and demanded Herbst stay on Liz. For once, ABC listened — and Herbst kept her job. This rare victory would later prove to be the impetus and blueprint for the future soap movement to save AMC and One Life from cancellation. It’s just too bad Herbst hasn’t been given a decent storyline since her job was saved at the last minute. But who’s surprised? Bitter bitches were running this show, but karma has changed all of that in 2012. Let’s hope next year, Herbst gets what’s coming to her: pure glory!

  8. THE CAST OF DIRTY SOAP

  Dirt? Check! Soap? Double check! Starring Nadia Bjorlin, Brandon Beemer, Fary “Mama” Bjorlin, Kirsten Storms, Kelly Monaco, Farah Fath, John-Paul Lavoisier, Galen and Jenna Gering, E! took soaps into the future by creating a frothy yet respectful reality-TV series based on the lives and loves of our favourite soap opera personalities. Not only were fans allowed an insider look into the stars’ real lives, we were also given a rare look into what it’s like to be fired from a soap, how the press affects the actors, and the pressures sex scenes have on a marriage (no comment).

  The real stars of the show? The world fell head-over-heels in love with Bradia the most, hands down. Many assumed, because of their gorgeous looks, real-life supercouple Nadia and Brandon were vapid and brainless. Fans soon learned what many of us in the press realized a long time ago:
It is possible to be smart, talented, hilarious, saucy, loyal, genuine and kind all in one gorgeous and sexy package! But enough about me…

  However, Bradia was not the scene-stealer. No, that honour is reserved for Nadia’s hell-on-heels mother, Mama Bjorlin, who stole the entire show with her infamous insults against future son-in-law, Brandon. As unnecessarily harsh and over-the-top as she was, Fary easily won us over with her undeniable old-world charm and diva quips. Earning a devoted fan base worthy of any soap star, Mama Bjorlin should be arrested because nothing this enjoyable is legal. Let’s hope there’s a season two in the works — and that La Bjorlin Señorita gets her own spin-off.

  9. DARRELL RAY THOMAS JR. AND MARLENE McPHERSON, DAYS OF OUR LIVES

  It’s a new day! Fans rejoiced when despised DAYS head writer Dena Higley was fired. But when executive producer Ken Corday announced two former DAYS/Passions writers were taking over, pundits groaned. However, Thomas and McPherson successfully rebooted the show as promised and DAYS has never been so well written or as socially relevant since the 1970s. Also, fan faves are back