Chapter Four
“My mom had an affair?” John was incredulous. This was impossible. His mother was a saint. Always so prudish and dignified.
“Yes, John. You were not the only one who felt the emptiness when your father was involved with everyone else but the family. She gave in to an impulse one day with a man who did not even go to church. That turned into a relationship that filled in the lonely times when both your father and you were gone.
“Before you went to college, she filled the empty part of her life with you. When you went away, there was no one around to help her pass the time. Much as you determined to go your own way and do your own thing to live a fulfilling life, your mother rebelled in a way that gave her life some kind of meaning.
“The problem was that she decided one day that this new meaning was not what she wanted her life to represent. She made a choice to go back and endure as the wife of a pastor and live that life to its fullest, even in its emptiness. When she announced this decision to her lover, he was furious. He threatened to tell about their affair but even then your mother would not back down. She had made her choice. She wanted to do the right thing.”
John was speechless. His mother had had an affair. He would have never thought her capable of it. But, knowing the loss he felt for Kathy, he could understand how his mother had felt a similar loss with his father always being consumed with other things. Home but never really there. Just a man who stopped by in between projects and meetings and counseling of those others who always took precedence. He had no problem understanding her need for someone to fill in the hole his father must have left in her life. He knew the hole that the loss of Kathy had left in his own life. Marcie had been filling in that hole for the past two days. Not that he was having an affair with her. Or was he?
“Are we having an affair, Marcie?” John asked suddenly. “To fill in the hole I sense now that Kathy is gone?”
“In a way, I guess you could say that,” Marcie smiled.
Her figure flickered back to the beautiful naked woman again. John felt ashamed as he noticed her transformed body anew. An affair? Like cheating?
“Not cheating, John.” Marcie apprised him. “It could only be cheating if Kathy were still there with you and I was there, too. Only if you were allowing someone else inside your life instead of her.” Marcie heard his thoughts.
“Yeah, I guess.” John agreed, still thinking it through. “Then what are we? Besides family?”
“We are whatever you want us to be.” Marcie was plain spoken as always.
“Are we lovers?” John asked.
“We were one time.” Marcie smiled. “At least I enjoyed it enough. You seemed to enjoy it at the time, but not so much later.” The naked woman laughed.
“Well, uh...I felt guilty about enjoying sex with a little girl.” John admitted. “Even if you are a hundred and thirty years old. You still look seven or eight.”
“It wasn't the seven year old little girl that you enjoyed, though, was it John?” Marcie asked.
“It wasn't?” John gave her a puzzled look. He had been ashamed because he thought it was.
“Not at all. Have you ever been sexually attracted to any other seven year old?”
“No.”
“There you go. You're no kind of pervert. What caused you to enjoy that moment of fluid release with me almost a year ago was not some perverted idea of having sex with a little girl. It was an innate knowledge of the experience you had with a woman who presented at times with the form of a little girl. It is complicated, to say the least, but not some sick idea of human perversion.” Marcie explained.
“So, I am not a pervert?” John asked seriously.
“No.” Marcie could not help herself. She had to stifle a laugh before it got too far out of her.
“I sure felt like I must have been. I had sex with a little girl ghost and enjoyed it more than I thought I would, more than a man should,” John admitted.
“Thank you for that admission but you're not a pervert. You have a healthy human interest in sex with grown women, not young girls. I've even noticed you checking out much older women. I've seen no indication that you even look twice at little girls, if that helps any.” Marcie offered.
“That sure takes a load off my mind.” John breathed a sigh of relief.
“Does that mean you're okay with us again?” Marcie asked.
“Well...uh...I guess that's what I'm saying. But...uh...I'm still thinking about the family thing.” John said.
“There is no such limitation inside the Mist or in any other plane except the human one.” Marcie explained. “We were destined to be family when I was alive. Now I am of the Mist and you are of the human plane. Separate entities from different worlds, if you will.”
“So, we violated no rules, when we...uh...shared fluids?” John searched for the words to describe their coupling.
“I would never have caused you or I to violate any rules, John.” Marcie told him. “What we did was totally within the rules and necessary for you at the time to complete the task you had chosen to accomplish. Because of my familiarity with you and your family, I was the obvious choice to make first contact. I was thrilled to be the one to bring you into the Mist that night.”
“Thrilled?”
“Sure. Bringing new energy to the plane is always a big feather in our caps, so to speak. But bringing in a family member is doubly good. Your energy is actually doubled by the Creator of Life when you join us because you and I are family. Although family does not mean a blood limitation inside the Mist, the fact that we are family makes us of a more enduring bond and thus makes the Mist stronger because of our bond.”
“Are there many of our family in the Mist?” John asked.
“You mean besides Kathy?”
“Yes.”
“There are several. And one day your mom will be given the chance to join us or to join your father where he is, in throne city. You have never met any of the relatives that are in here in your physical life, but one day you will rejoice with us inside the Mist, if you choose to come here.”
“How could I not?” John smiled. “My two favorite ladies are inside the Mist.” Meaning Kathy and Marcie.
“I am so glad to hear you say that, John.” Marcie smiled and flickered back to the little girl.
“I wish there was something I could do from this plane to help you finally evolve into the womanly form once and for all.” John offered by way of apologizing for his bad attitude toward her and trying to insert himself into Marcie's world.
“Actually there is,” Marcie smiled.
“How?” John really wanted to know. He was anxious to make amends for his behavior. “Just tell me what I can do and I'll do it.”
“Take me to your bed and love me with the love of a true friend. Want the best for me, as I have done for you, and your love will empower me to fully withdraw from the atrocities of the human plane that still have a hold on me. I was disfigured physically and emotionally in the human plane by one who hated with a strong hatred. One who loves with a stronger love can break that bond and give me a freedom I have not known for a long time.”
“I can do that.” John stated. “I want to do that.” He added. “Nothing would give me more pleasure than to help you as you have helped me.”
For the first time in John's life, he felt a purpose in helping someone else. Not a stepping back and taking a back seat. But a stepping up and doing the thing that made their life more purposeful, more full. He finally understood in a small way what drove his father every day to step out the door and do it all over again despite any setbacks and failures. He finally understood what went through Kathy's mind as she made her final decision in the human plane.
Marcie smiled up at him from her battered little girl form and he saw hope bursting forth from the misery engraved in her filthy, torn countenance. That glimmer of hope ignited his own hope. Things were going to be okay. He knew it now. He could sense good things on the horizon. White puffy clouds. No
t the dark ones. And it would all start with helping Marcie as she had helped him.
“Come, lover,” Marcie held out her little girl hand. “Let us indulge in the pleasures of love and acquaint ourselves with the joys of fluid sharing on a level you have only dreamed of before.”
John heard the over flirtatious tone of her voice and wondered if she was really excited by this change or just trying to maintain her positive outlook and keep him moving forward. A splash of guilt flowed through his mind as he remembered his past actions and how they had been self serving. He held out his hand and took hers. It felt warm and alive and vibrant this time. He had no idea how this would change her permanently but if she said it would, he would help. He did love her. Not just because she was family. Not just because she had been a good friend in his hour of need. He loved her because somehow he sensed they were destined to meet like this and to share a relationship exactly as they were. It seemed right. It seemed perfect. Maybe not a permanent thing but at least, as his father would have put it, right for this season of his life.
Paul Paxwood was thirsty. He had been drinking water all day and as the evening hours brought quiet to the hospital, he experienced no relaxation of his thirst. He was being released the next morning. His loving wife, Rita, would be back at nine a.m. to pick him up and he was glad to be getting out. But the thirst worried him. He could not get enough to drink to satisfy the dryness he felt with every inch of his body. It was driving him crazy.
“It WILL eventually drive you crazy.” The voice broke into his thoughts. It was in his head, not in the room.
“What?”
Paul had not yet gotten used to the comings and goings of the voice in his head. The voice had been with him every step of the way. At night, when Paul was the only one awake and dealing with the healing process in his mind as well as his body, the voice would come to him and comfort him. During treatments, when the pain of his physical body seemed to be almost too great to handle, the voice spoke the words of reason and endurance he needed. At every turn and new juncture, Paul came to depend on the voice to be there and know what he needed. But the suddenness with which he just showed up or popped into his head were startling events. Alone, then not alone. Sudden.
“I said, the thirst will eventually drive you crazy. As you grow more and more aware of your connection with the elements of the Sand, you will also experience a greater and greater dryness drawing from the connection your awareness is creating with more and more of the Sand plane. Water will not quench that thirst. It is a blood thirst.”
“Blood thirst? You mean like a vampire?” Paul asked, trying to link the thought with something he understood, or at least knew about.
“Well, not exactly but somewhat similar in scope.” The voice began. “You do not need to drink anyone's blood, but you do need to partake of it in a manner that adds blood to the Sand plane.”
“Sounds gross.” Paul admitted.
“I guess to the human mindset it would seem so,” The voice gave him that consideration. “But the satisfaction you desire now, is linked to the needs of Sand. As you have become part of us, you will experience the needs of the collective plane. Because you are also human and still in the human plane, you will experience the thirst in a more severe or sensitive way.”
“You saying I have to drink blood, now?” Paul was concerned with this new twist.
“Not drink. Imbibe.”
“Imbibe?”
“Yes. You must meld with a person whose blood still flows through their body and partake of their blood energies to satisfy the thirst inside you.” The voice explained.
“Meld!” Paul almost spoke out loud. This was getting out of hand. No one said anything about melding, whatever that was.
“Melding is a process by which you touch another human and enter them with your sand elements and drink of their body's fluids. Take a little and they will feel a little weak but not be harmed. Drink too much and they will be dead where they fall because life can not exist with only spiritual energy left. Life requires a balance of blood, fluids and spiritual energy. If you partake too deeply of blood or fluids during the melding process it will not leave the body strong enough to contain the spiritual energy.”
“You saying I need to drain people to satisfy my own thirst?” Paul was getting scared now. This was not part of the deal.
“Yes, Paul. It was part of the deal. You are of the Sand now. We healed you of your need for flesh and its confines. Part of that process is bringing you into the world of Sand. Sand has a blood and fluid energy demand. Maybe we did not talk about that at the outset, but there was too little time to explain everything. I asked you what your choice was and you chose to stay in the human plane. There was only one way, at the time, to accomplish that. We did our part by helping you achieve your goals. Now, as part of us, you must do your part to satisfy the collective thirst.”
“This is crazy.” Paul felt trapped by his decision. He was not so sure he would have chosen to join the Sand if he had known about this requirement.
“Sure, you would have,” the voice told him. “Staying with Rita was your primary concern, then. What has changed? You still want to stay with her, don't you?”
“Of course.” Paul admitted.
“Then what would have changed in your decision?” The voice asked.
“I would have had to think more seriously about what my staying would mean.” Paul explained.
“First off, you did not have time for any more thinking about it. Second, think about it now. You want to stop? Do you want to go ahead and die and leave Rita, now?” The voice made his case.
“No. I guess not,” Paul gave in. “It's just so … uh … so unnatural.” Paul spit it out. “Drinking people's blood to satisfy my own life. Sounds like some science fiction show or something.”
“You're not drinking it. You'll never taste it or feel anything accept satisfied from the process. The melding will leave a little rash on the skin of the person you touch but that is it. As far as science fiction, where do you think all those ideas come from? Someone from one of the other planes comes through to a human in your plane and shares something. If that human tells his or her story, it becomes a myth or legend or at least a good plot to some book or movie. So, you are not far wrong from your diagnosis of the events of your life. You are living a real life science fiction plot. Only its not fiction. It's real.”
“Is there no way around this blood thing?” Paul asked. “ I really do not want to hurt people.”
“Listen to me and no one will get hurt. The only real danger to people is if you do not listen to me and refuse to control your enjoyment of melding.”
“Enjoyment? I hardly think I will ever enjoy it.” Paul was pretty sure of that fact.
“Ever been so thirsty that you got a bottle of Coke and turned it up and drank it all the way to the bottom no matter how much the bubbles burned your throat?” The voice asked.
“Sure. Everyone has done that.” Paul smiled to himself.
“Well, partaking of the blood is that kind of satisfaction, maybe even a little bit higher because it also has a fluids contingent. The temptation to drain the person to the bottom like that Coke bottle will be hard to resist if you are not in control of yourself and listening to me.” The voice explained.
“How often am I going to have to partake of the blood, as you call it.?” Paul wanted to know.
“Depends on how sensitive you are to the needs of the Sand. Also depends on how much the person you choose satisfies your thirst. A lot of factors go into the level of satisfaction you achieve. At the top would be consuming an adult human blood supply totally. That would probably result in a month long satisfaction, maybe more. The partial partaking of a healthy adult, leaving them weakened but still healthy, would most likely yield about a week's worth of satisfaction. Partially partaking of a child might get you through a couple days. It all depends on what, who and how much you partake.”
“This is real then? I really
have to partake of human blood to survive and continuing to live in this plane, as you call it.”
Paul was accepting the situation without liking it. He had made the deal. True enough. Yes, there had not been time to find out all the details. Yes, he believed the voice had held back this detail on purpose. But there was nothing he could do about that now. There was Rita to consider and his own future success which he wanted to achieve. What was done was done. He was not going to change that.
The voice was right. Even if he had known the full details of what he was buying into, he would not have chosen differently. He would still have chosen to stay with Rita. He loved her. He wanted to be with her so much it hurt. He could not have left her even if he had known that he had to partake of other people's blood before making his decision.
“It's real, Paul.”
The voice called him by his name, uncharacteristically. Very personal for a change. Not just a voice with information. It was someone he knew. Someone he would have to trust in these things. Someone he would have to depend on.
“Well, if we are going to be close friends like this, I should probably know your name.” Paul tried to sound enthusiastic but had to settle for accepting.
“My name is Kul.” Pronounced COOL.
“Well, how do we go about this, Kul?” Paul asked. “Do I just walk up to people and ask if I can take some of their blood?” He was being purposely ignorant.
“No. That would not work well, even if it were a good idea. You need to do this in a manner that people are unaware that you are taking anything from them. If the authorities are alerted to your partaking activities, they could make it very hard for you to satisfy the thirst.”
“Then how do we make it happen?” Paul was curious about the process that allowed him to walk up to another human being and take some of their blood.
“Along with the ability of the Sand within you to meld with individuals for the purpose of extracting some of their blood, you also have the added characteristic of placing people in a trance with just your eyes. Get them to stare into your eyes and they will fall into a trance from which they will allow you to do anything you want with them. Get them to move to another room, meet you somewhere, anything. Once they are in your trance, you can command them to carry out your bidding even when they awake. And then, when you are alone with them, they will give themselves to you, which makes the extraction of their blood legal. Taking blood without permission is against the rules. If they do not offer it, you can end up in the Place of Chains for stealing blood. Sand does not want stolen blood. Only blood offered willingly.” Kul explained.
“But your man in our bedroom was going to take it without our permission.” Paul reminded Kul.
“Not actually. One way to get a person's permission is to get them to fight back. In a fight, both humans are at risk of spilling their blood. They thereby give permission to have their blood spilled in the commission of the act.”
“So, if I had not fought back, your man could not have taken my blood?” Paul was curious at this strange fact.
“Precisely. He could take it but it would not have been legal. Thereby unusable for Sand. Most every human will fight back when faced with immediate danger of death. That response, makes them perfect candidates for partaking of their blood.”
“Kind of tricky, ain't it?” Paul asked.
“Yes. But the trick is in knowing the rules and most humans are unaware of the rules through their own choice to be ignorant. By not understanding the rules of blood and fluids and spiritual energy, they make themselves targets, not immune from danger. Your commonwealth laws say that there is no excuse for not knowing the law. Your are still subject to obeying them. It is the duty of every human to understand the laws about the things they are involved with. That same principle applies in the different planes of existence. Just because a human does not choose to understand everything about the rules of the plane they exist in, does not exempt them from those same rules.”
“Okay, so there is a legal basis for the trickery.” Paul agreed. “Still, it is trickery.”
“No more so than you buying new clothes to impress your then girlfriend, Rita, all those months you dated. The image you presented to her when you went out together had nothing to do with the real person you were when she was not around. Same idea. You used her ignorance of who you were before you met her to add to your image and be someone you thought was acceptable to her. We do the same thing to become acceptable to humans in this plane. We dress our intentions up so that everyone gets what they want. Rita got a more impressive you and you got Rita. No difference.”
“How do you know about me before I met Rita?” Paul wanted to know.
“We have been monitoring you for a while, now. We did not know when or even if we'd get a chance to talk with you but you have been someone we thought would make an good addition to Sand since you were young.”
“Since I was young?”
“Yes, about four I believe. You had cut your hand pretty badly and then rubbed it in the sand of your driveway to wipe away the blood. When your mother asked you why you rubbed your hand in the dirt, you told her that the sand was thirsty.”
Paul remembered that day. He was very young but he remembered his mom telling that story many times. She remembered it and told the story often because she said it was a sign that Paul was headed for bigger things in life. He was not just joking, she told everyone. Paul actually knew that the sand was thirsty for his blood that day.
“You were there?”
“Not me, actually, Paul. But us of the Sand.”
“Seems strange to be monitored and not know it.” Paul spoke softly in his head. He was thinking.
“Even as small child, you understood there was more to this existence of the humans than met the eye. You had a special attachment to nature, animals and such. You saw and felt things in them that others missed and just walked over. As you grew older you let those others talk you out of it. Your parents never introduced you to anything remotely spiritual, so the understanding took a back seat in your mind. But it never completely left. That is why you had no trouble believing me when I came to you that night. It was easy for you to understand the other planes and making the decision you made as long as you thought about it without letting your brain get in the way. Inside you, where the real Paul lives and plays, you know a truth beyond what your outer person was subjected to. That was the Paul I was trying to reach that night and recruit for our purposes.”
“So, those things I experienced as a child were real?”
“More real than the explanations the adults gave to make you conform to their view of the world.” Kul answered him. “Church is not the only place where adult humans fit their definitions and ideas into small boxes that are easy to label. That is why there is so much strife in your human plane. Too many people who want others to think they know all the answers without doing any of the research or investigation necessary to achieve it.”
“Kind of makes a guy mad to know his authorities were lying to him all those years.” Paul grinned.
“Not lying. Ignorance can not lie. It can still lead others astray and it can even kill, but it is not a lie unless the one telling it knows better. Bad information. Perhaps even a negligent attitude, but not lying.”
“Still, I felt like I was stupid all those years. Seeing and hearing and thinking things that made me seem weird in comparison to other people.” Paul explained.
“Well, in your plane, weird is everything that does not line up with the expectations of those in authority at the time. What is done today in your society would have been declared weird by past societies.”
“I can see your point,” Paul acknowledged. “So, where do I find these people I am supposed to put in a trance and partake of their blood?”
“Anywhere and everywhere.” Kul answered. “The only thing anyone will remember of their experience after you partake of their blood is that somehow they feel a closer affinity to you.”
/> “You mean, after I partake of their blood, they are actually going to like me more?” Paul chuckled at the idea.
“Precisely. And if you partake of them again a few months later, you will strengthen the bond between you. You never kill them but you steal away a part of them with their blood and they are drawn toward the one who is now a part of them without even realizing why. You leave nothing of yourself in them so you are not drawn to them, but they are drawn to be part of your life from that moment on because you contain a part of them.”
“This could get to be sticky, if the person is a woman,” Paul thought about it.
“No more so than if it were a man,” Kul added.
“I see what you mean,” Paul smiled. “When can we get started. I have a powerful thirst that needs quenching.”
“Now you're talking,” Kul answered. “But first we have to plan it out.”
“How so?”
“Because those you partake of will be drawn to you, it only makes sense that you partake of people who can help you succeed at whatever you choose to do. Since they become drawn to you in the process, their help in your endeavors in the human plane will be assured. Need a loan, partake of the bank examiner responsible for giving you that loan. Instant approval.”
“I see...” Paul let the last word drag out until the breath ceased coming from his lungs. This was going to be good, Paul thought. Maybe even better than he thought.