“Please don’t be mistaken, Jezebel, you haven’t taken my man. I still have a ring on my finger and he would never seriously consider being with a woman like you. As I said before, you’re just like all the rest of those nasty women out there. You’ll spread your legs for whoever wants to take a dive. My husband has his faults, but I’m a strong woman of God who’s willing to pray for my man. Honey, you can’t do anything for him. He’s fighting a spiritual war and if he’s not sleeping with you, then he’s sleeping with someone else. It’s always the same woman, different name,” Tamera explained.
Sasha’s rage grew; she felt betrayed by Lance on so many levels. She had mixed emotions. She felt like scum and yet was extremely annoyed by the woman’s stereotypes of her. For the first time, Sasha was biting her tongue, yielding to the woman’s pain and vulnerability. She was reaching her boiling point and did not know how much longer she would be able to keep her composure. The more she thought about what Lance had done to her, the more she wanted to hurt someone. The woman continued to talk until Sasha cut her off rudely.
“OK, OK, OK! I get it! You think you know women like me. I’m sorry that you’re going through this, sweetie, but I’m not the one to blame for all this drama. I understand that you’re a Christian woman and all that, but stop blaming all of your husband’s issues on him or me. I went through his phone and saw a pic of you and you’re the typical, plain Jane Christian woman who has probably become boring to him…,” Sasha stated before she was cut off in the middle of her sentence.
“EXCUSE ME!” the woman responded, outraged.
“No, I’m going to finish talking. I have the floor now. Church women like you are also a dime a dozen, Boo Boo. You’re so consumed with church that you’re probably neglecting your husband. While you’re in Wednesday night Bible study, he’s probably home alone, feeling like he’s second place in your life. Your church schedule has allowed room for the enemy to enter into your home, dear. So, don’t talk to me all deep about spirits and forget to mention that Satan can use the church as a distraction and divide couples in the process. Yes, you’re saved, but not dead. What man wants to come home to someone who is dressed like his mom?” Sasha asked, no longer feeling sorry for the woman.
“Is that what you think? Honey, my husband and I do make love. How do you think that I had my three daughters and got pregnant again?” the woman argued.
“Look, I know that you may be trying to be a good wife, but the reason why these so- called church men cheat with women like me is simple. They want a sexy wife; they want you to say things to them that you wouldn’t dare say to anyone else. They want a fantasy. That’s why a lot of men crave porn. Your husband pursued me,” Sasha explainedfrankly. “I could teach you what he likes.” Sasha laughed at the idea of offering bedroom tips.
“Since you’re an expert on marriage, why aren’t you married?” the womanasked. This was a low blow to Sasha, as that was exactly what she wanted to be. She didnotunderstand why no one had offered to marry her yet. She had been with a lot of men, but realized that something was missing. She was beautiful, had a great shape, knew how to please a man, but questioned if she was actually suited to be a wife.
Sasha took a long pause before answering. The other woman knew that she had hit a nerve.
“When Lance comes home to you, tell him to forget that he ever knew me. You can also tell him that he’ll need to file a claim to replace his cell phone, because it will accidently be dropped into the toilet along with all of his lies and bull,” Sasha stated as she hung up, began to rip all the sheets from her bed and threw the cell phone at the wall as hard as she could. She then gathered the sheets and headed towards the bathroom, where she threw the sheets into the tub. Next she ran down the hallway and grabbed the bleach from her linen closet. Without hesitation, she poured the whole bottle of bleach on the sheets as if she could wash the sin of adultery away. The bleach splashed everywhere and started to discolor the shower curtain. Tears streamed down her face like a leaky faucet. Saddened at the thought that Lance had stolen, and then broken her heart, she realized suddenly that she was desperate to be loved. The reality was that she gave her heart away to anyone who could manipulate it just enough to make her feel good in the moment.
Chapter Five
KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK.
Sasha got up, looked through her peephole and discovered that Randi was standing at her door. Although she did not feel like having company, she knew that she had to apologize for leaving Tia with her the week before. She opened the door and gave Randi a nonchalant greeting.
“Well, good day to you too, Boo.”
“Hello, Randi.”
“Dang, you act as if speaking to me is going to kill you. I’m not mad at you, Sasha. What happened between us is over. Girl, you know that I don’t hold grudges.”
“I know, but I feel terrible about what I did. You were right. I’m irresponsible,” Sasha admitted.
Randi could not believe her ears. She was shocked that Sasha actually admitted that she was irresponsible.
“Wow, that was very mature of you. Is everything ok?” Randi said jokingly, but Sasha did not laugh. It was not like Sasha to be the serious sister and not have a smart aleck comeback.
“I got the job that I interviewed for.”
“That’s awesome, but why are you changing the subject?”
Sasha rolled her eyes and knew that Randi was not going to let up until she got some answers. Randi had become like a second mother to her and was way less judgmental than Stacey. She was torn over Lance and needed someone to confide in.
“I’ve been going through a lot and haven’t felt like talking to anyone.”
“You feel like talking about it now? You look so depressed.”
Sasha began to cry as she thought about her latest scandal.
“Randi, I can’t believe that you came out of the house dressed like that?”
“What? Where did that come from?”
“I’m just tired of seeing you look like an old maid.”
“Why are you and Stacey so concerned with the way I dress? Your rude comments are getting on my last nerve and you two have absolutely no regard for my feelings.”
“Stop being so sensitive. I’m just concerned because you’re married and need to keep Russell looking only at you.”
“Excuse me? What makes you think that my husband has stopped looking at me?You’re way out of line, Sasha. What’s wrong with you?”
Sasha dropped her head in shame and replied, “I slept with a married man.”
“Who?”
“Oh, no. He’s no one you know.”
“Ok, dear, I just wanted to get that straight first.”
“This guy I was seeing.”
Randi did not say a word and knew that there had to be more to the story, or at least hoped so. She knew Sasha could be promiscuous at times, but never considered her to be a home wrecker.
“He played me. He never told me that he was married. I can’t believe that I didn’t know.”
“What do you mean you didn’t know? How could you not know, Sasha?”
“First of all, he didn’t wear a wedding ring. He actually didn’t seem like the husband type. Plus, he came to see me all the time.
Randi stared at Sasha in disgust.
“I never thought to ask him. I immediately assumed he was single.”
“Have you ever been to his house?”
“No.”
“Have you ever seen him during regular hours? I’m not talking about late night creeping. Have you ever consistently seen him during daytime or early evening hours?
“No.”
“Sasha, that’s enough right there to make a woman skeptical.”
Sasha was overwhelmed with disappointment and avoided eye contact with Randi. She was humiliated. She buried her face in her hands and began to sob.
Randy ceased to interrogate her. It was obvious that Sasha was remorseful and just needed her sister to comfort her without
any judgment.
“Please don’t tell Stacey about this.”
“Why would I do that?”
“Because she asked me about him all the time, probably because I told her that he was an attorney.”
“You told her about him and told her about his career? Of course she’s going to ask about him. What were you thinking? Stacey stays in your business because you put her in your business.”
Sasha sat and thought about what Randi said.
“I was so stupid,” Sasha replied, as she reminisced about her love affair with Lance.
“I hate that you have to go through this, but imagine how his wife must feel. I promise you that her pain is ten times worse than yours. That’s if she ever finds out…”
“She knows.”
“What?”
“He left his phone over here and she kept calling…so I answered.”
“Oh my goodness,” Randi said, her eyes open wide in shock and disbelief.
“That’s when I found out he was married. I felt like a cheap whore talking to his wife. What makes it so bad is that I answered the phone like she owed me an explanation for calling my man’s phone. You know how my mouth can be. I even called her by her name. I messed up big time Randi.”
Randi began to sympathize with both Sasha and the other woman. Her heart became heavy and she began to pray silently, butloudly and boldly in her spirit. Sasha shook her head from side to side, both eyes closed tightly as if she was trying to awaken from a bad dream. There were no words that could comfort Sasha, so Randi just hugged her and they began to sob together.
Chapter Six
Randi returned home having had a true wake up call. The conversation with Sasha was very fresh in her mind and she started to reevaluate her own marriage. She began to brainstorm about areas in which she could improve. Although she felt like she had a healthy marriage, she knew that it needed some maintenance and began to fear the worst case scenario. Russell was not back from taking the boys to the movies for their monthly father and son outing. He had done so religiously for two years and Randi looked forward to her kid free Sunday afternoon. With nothing to do, she had decided to visit Sasha to smooth things over, but came home devastated and paranoid. Sasha planted a seed of fear in her that never existed before and it grew, faster than any seed she knew of.
Frustrated and even more insecure with her image, she knew that Sasha was right. She began to wonder what if Russell admired other women from afar.With little time to waste, Randi made up her mind that she was going to live life differently. She refused to waste time with the excuse that she still had her baby weight; the truth was that her youngest child was five and that she had been neglecting herself terribly. Reality had hit her in the face, thanks to Sasha’s drama, and she refused to neglect herself any further. She dashed to the bedroom and opened her undergarment drawer. She searched for a sexy pair of panties, but seemed to grab nothing that did not look like her period panties. No longer in denial, she knew that she was in desperate need of a makeover and knew just the person to call: “Stacey,” she said aloud. Sucking up her pride, she took a deep breath, reached inside her coat pocket and took out her cell phone. Butterflies jittered around in her stomach, making it hard to place the call. She hurried to press send before she chickened out. The phone began to ring as she prayed that she would be sent to voicemail to avoid going through with her call.
“Hello?” Stacey answered brusquely.
“Hey Stacey, what are you doing?”
“What do you want, Randi? And no, I wasn’t at church today, if that’s why you’re calling me.”
“Actually, I was calling to talk to you. Believe it or not, I’m not your personal church patrol,” Randi giggled, letting out a sigh to relieve some of her nerves.
“Well, this is a surprise. What’s wrong?”
“Why does something have to be wrong for me to call my dear sister?”
“Ok, now you’re terrifying me. You never call me for no reason.”
“You’re right! I was calling to tell you that you were right.”
“Right about what.”
“About everything.”
“Shut the front door and where is my sister? I have no idea what you’re referring to, but I like the fact that you’re admitting that I’m right about something,” Stacey exclaimed,grinning from ear to ear.
“I’m not going to lie. I was hurt when you asked me to send you a picture of what I was going to wear to your Grand Opening. I was hurt about a lot of things. Sometimes I think you’re embarrassed of me and my children. That’s why Russell is so cold towards you. I act like nothing you and Sasha do or say bothers me, but he has to see my tears and he can’t stand to see me hurt,” Randi admitted as she poured out her feelings.
“I can’t believe that you actually thought that I was embarrassed of you and the kids. For the record, I’m not embarrassed of y’all. I just wish that you and I could have some grown up sister time together. You always have the kids with you and sometimes I need to vent without censoring my conversation. You’re so sensitive and take things the wrong way. Personally, I hate rejection too, and every time that I ask you to do something, you always decline because of your family. Trust me, I get it. I just get angry because I miss having my sister around.”
“Wow, I never thought about it like that. That means a lot to me. I had no idea that you felt that way. Well then, what about my appearance? Are you ashamed of me?”
“No.”
“That’s it, ‘no’?”
“No, I’m not ashamed of you. I think you’re beautiful. I just wish that you could see that. Sometimes you act like you don’t care about yourself and that’s what upsets me. I know that I don’t say things as gently as you would, which could make me seem as if I’m being mean or rude. My intentions were never to hurt you. I just get so tired of seeing you put everyone before you. You let yourself go.”
“I know,” Randi mumbled, barely above a whisper. “That’s why I called you, because I know that I could do better. I just don’t know where to start.”
“The fact that you want to change is a start.”
“I agree, and that’s why I called you. I want you to go shopping with me.”
“OFCOURSE I’LL GO!” Stacey screamed in excitement. “This is going to be so much fun. You deserve a makeover. When do you want to go?”
“Well, Russell and the boys are still out. Are you available today?”
“It’s a date. Meet me at the mall in forty-five minutes.”
“Yes, ma’am. Oh… and I love you, Stacey.”
“I love you too.”
Stacey hung up the phone, overjoyed. She could not believe that Randi truly wanted a makeover. With only minutes to spare, she went into the living room to share her exciting news with Larry. As she approached the living room she could smell the fresh popcorn that Larry was eating.
“Babe! You’re not going to believe this.”
“What?”
“Randi called me and she wants to go shopping.”
“Ok…and…?”
“Honey, that’s a big deal. You know that we never go shopping together.”
“I don’t know what ya’ll do together; I’m usually at work.”
“Ok, I’m usually at work too, and you know that we never go shopping. What’s wrong with you and why are you being so short?” Staceyasked, realizing that Larry was in one of his spontaneous bad moods.
“Look. Have fun with your sister. I’m trying to watch the game.”
“Forget your game.”
“What did you say to me?” asked Larry as he stood up from the couch, walked towards Stacey, and poured his popcorn on top of her head. Stacey squinted her eyes in rage and flared her nostrils.
“Oh, so I guess you’re mad,” Larry said as he raised his hand above his head to smack Stacey. She flinched and put her arms in front of her face to resist the impact. But he did not follow through. Seeing Stacey intimidated and crying instantly ma
de him laugh hysterically.
“I’m not going to hit you. Go have fun with your sister.”
Stacey turned and began to walk towards the downstairs guest bathroom. She brushed the popcorn out of her hair, picked her purse up from the floor and began to search for her makeup bag.
“Yeah, make sure that you get yourself together before you leave this house. Remember, you represent me,” Larry emphasized as he watched Stacey walk into the bathroom.
Chapter Seven
Randi waited patiently for Stacey at the food court and began to wonder if she had stood her up. Just as she was about to leave, she spotted Stacey walking towards her as the crowd from the smoothie line cleared. With a huge smile on her face, she met Stacey in the middle of the food court.
“Thank you so much for meeting me here on such short notice.”
“No problem, I wasn’t doing anything.”
“What? You mean that you were actually at home relaxing and weren’t working.”
Stacey laughed because she worked just as much as Larry. Not because she was a workaholic, but because she just hated it when Larry rubbed his money in her face.
“Let’s leave my work at work,” Stacey said as she adjusted the shoulder strap of her purse.
“Done. So where should we go first?”
“What do you want to change?”
“Everything,” Randi said with a nervous laugh to cover up her embarrassment. “I want to reinvent myself. I mean a huge change.”
“Girl, what are you up to? How huge are we talking?” Stacey looked surprised and confused. She did not know if she should be happy or worried about Randi.
“I want to wear thongs kind of change.”
“Huh? Are you ok? Not my conservative sister. You want to wear thongs? Girl, bye.”
Stacey could not stop laughing. She could not believe her ears for one moment. As she opened her eyes, she looked at Randi’s serious demeanor. “Sorry girl, but I really needed that laugh. So you really want to change everything about yourself? Why?”
“I’m tired of looking old. I still want to be conservative, but with some style. I want to wow my husband. I want to be sexy.”
“Girl, you cannot buy sexy. Believe me when I tell you, Russell already thinks you’re sexy. Don’t pull me into your ‘tramp stamp’ makeover.”
“My what?” Randi laughed.
“Randi, I agree that you need a major makeover. However you still need to be you. When I see you I don’t think of thongs, honey.”