“You two need to sort things out,” Finny tells me, scrambling to his feet to go running after Spencer. “And before our next game.”
“You better go too, Jones,” I say; his discomfort at having to choose between me and Spencer makes me feel even worse.
He opens his mouth to apologise then stops when Chrissie wanders over with her breakfast tray. “I’ll try to sort things. See you later.”
“What’s going on?” she asks, sitting down next to me. “You didn’t tell him, did you?”
I shake my head, my stomach going crazy as the three of them sit down and start whispering. “No, like everyone else, he thinks I started it because I’m the jealous-brother type.”
“I had to say something,” she protests. “Has Spencer said anything about me putting Parker’s mobile in the staffroom?”
I cringe, hoping no one heard, but by the way Finny’s now glaring at me, I’m betting he did.
“Sorry,” Chrissie apologises, looking as terrified as I feel. “I couldn’t sleep last night worrying what was happening to you.”
“I’m fine,” I say, taking hold of her shaking hand in an effort to stop her from freaking out and getting us into even more trouble. “If you hadn’t done what you did, Spencer would have told Parker for sure.”
“He didn’t report you?” she looks just as surprised as I had.
“No,” I reply, keeping my voice to a whisper. “And he isn’t going to either.”
“Why?”
I don’t want to frighten her any more than I have to, but in this insane place, who knows what would happen to her if one of the others finds out she’s involved. “Chrissie, he’s only keeping quiet so you don’t get into trouble too, so you need to keep away from him until I can sort this mess out.”
“But you said he’s not going to do anything.”
“He wasn’t, but…” I break off, not wanting to tell her this part. I don’t want her to see me as one of her Goldmeads bullies. “I thought I knew who it was. It wasn’t, and Spencer now thinks I’m a grass on top of everything else. So keep a low profile and don’t say anything until I find out who did it.”
“But he didn’t report you.”
“Doesn’t matter; he thinks I’m a snitch and a thief!”
“So?”
“You do realise what would have happened if I’d got caught?”
She nods, “No one would talk to you.”
“And the rest, Chrissie!” I can’t believe I have to spell it out in block capitals. “The other guy killed himself.”
I know I’d said too much even before I blurt out my own fear. Not many people have experienced bullying to such extremes that they’ve wanted to kill themselves, but Chrissie has, and I’ve just reminded her in the cruellest way.
“Chrissie, I’m sorry.” Hugging her to me as she cries freely into my shoulder, I swallow my own terror as I make the mistake of looking up and catching Spencer’s furious gaze. He looks just like Damien in Omen II now; luckily for me, he doesn’t have the power of Satan to call upon — at least I hope he doesn’t.
“I’ll sort it out,” I promise, pausing to thank a girl who runs over with a stack of napkins.
Chrissie sits up to reveal a river of black mascara tears running down her face.
“Are you going to be okay?” I ask, handing her a napkin.
She nods and dabs at her eyes. “Do you know who it is?”
“Maybe,” I reply as I watch Fiona head out with her friend. “It’ll be all right — I promise.”
Chapter 20
After Chrissie leaves for her riding lesson, I hide myself in the depths of the library to draw up a list of possible suspects and their motives. It’s not Finny, even though he had the opportunity. All he cares about is rugby, so there’s no way he’d have hidden the mobile in my bag even if he did take it. Of course that rules out Baxter and the rest of the rugby squad, and I’d bet my life it’s not Jones, which just leaves me with Fiona and Spencer.
Chewing the top of my pencil in an effort to get inspiration, I look down at my lame list of motives. I didn’t give some girl I hardly know the lead role in my film, and the billionaire son of my dad’s new boss did it because he didn’t like me hanging around with his best friend. This isn’t as easy as they make it look in the films.
Annoyed I can’t think of a single reason why anyone would have taken Parker’s mobile, and it was just bad luck it ended up in my bag, I head back to my dorm and walk straight into Baxter and Finny.
“Going somewhere, Jarvis?” Baxter asks me, somehow managing to make himself look even bigger.
I swallow as I realise in the two hours I’ve been away, Spencer’s blabbed big time. As I see it, I can try to talk my way out of it, ignore it, take the offensive, or laugh it off. I decide to take the offensive. Baxter doesn’t look like he’s in the mood to talk.
“Yes, to my room!” I say it with attitude, and hope he can’t hear the fear in my voice, but Baxter doesn’t budge.
“I don’t think so,” he says, taking a step forward. “Not until I give you a little something to think about.”
My whole body goes stiff as anger-infused fear surges through me. “I didn’t take it.”
“Yes,” says Baxter, all sarcastic-like. “Spencer said you’d try to squirm your way out of it.”
“It wasn’t me.” I say it again in the smallest hope he’ll listen. “Why would I do it? I’m not that stupid!”
“Oh, I don’t know,” Baxter says. “You’re stupid enough to dress up as a girl and film it.”
“And bully your sister into covering up for you,” Finny adds with even more malice.
“What?” Confusion clouds the fear and anger summersaulting my stomach into the worst-ever stage fright.
“You heard!” Baxter shoves me so I hard I almost trip over my own feet as I stumble back into the wall. “What kind of lowlife scum are you?”
In the crazy messed-up terror whizzing round my head, I don’t know what to say. It’s like watching a film on x8 speed — it’s all happening too quickly for me to take in, and turning round, I do what I should have done when I first found that stupid mobile in my bag.
Shaking inside and out, I knock on Parker’s door, sweat breaking out all over my body when I realise Finny and Baxter look highly amused instead of scared.
“Come in.”
I take a deep breath and push down on the door handle. It’s one thing acting brave, but it doesn’t make you brave inside, and hoping I’m not going to hurl up soggy cornflakes, I step inside to find Spencer’s beaten me to it.
This time there’s an undertone of smugness when he glares at me, and feeling like I’m walking across a carpet of cockroaches, I stand alongside him.
“Thank you, Spencer,” says Parker, dismissing him. “You can leave this with me now.”
I was right. He’s definitely pleased with himself as he shoves past me on his way out.
“Don’t try to deny it,” Parker warns me as he squeezes a rugby ball between his two hands. “There’s only one thing I want to know.”
I know I’m only making it even worse for myself, but I’m not going to take the blame for something I didn’t do. “It wasn’t me, sir. I found it in my—” He cuts me off mid-sentence by slamming the ball on his desk, making everything and me jump.
“Save it for the headmaster!” he roars, rising to his feet. “You broke The Code — it’s up to the headmaster now whether he’s willing to rehabilitate you.”
Twenty minutes later, I’m in the Head’s office, and in keeping with his whole vampire-image thing, his gloomy office is complete with a coat of arms, creepy fireplace, and vomiting stone gargoyle that looks like it’s puking on top of his grey head.
“You’ve brought shame on yourself, your family, and the entire school.”
I stand still and quiet and fix my eyes on the glass eagle paperweight that sits in the middle of his mahogany desk. I thought I’d feel sick, but I don’t feel anything except th
is strange kind of numbness; I still can’t believe this is real and not some screenplay.
“Why did you steal Mr Parker’s mobile?” the Head asks me again.
“I didn’t, sir.” Expelled or sentenced to a year with no privileges and no friends, whatever happens to me, I’m as good as dead, but I’m still not going to confess to something I didn’t do.
“So why didn’t you go to Mr Parker?” he demands. “Why force your sister to hide it?”
“I panicked, sir,” I reply, relieved I can answer at least one of his questions honestly. “And Chrissie…” I stop. I can’t do this to her. Me, I’m getting expelled for sure. She won’t — she’ll be left here all alone, and because of this stupid Code thing, it’ll be Goldmeads all over again.
“Well?” the headmaster prompts.
I swallow, dig deep into my vast acting repertoire to find some courage to get me through the next few minutes, and hope they don’t realise I’m lying. “And when Chrissie refused to help, I told her I’d tell everyone she’d taken Mr Parker’s mobile.”
Neither of them says anything for a long time.
“You do realise what will happen if I decide to expel you?” says the Head.
I nod; I’m ready for this.
“You’re a straight-A student, Jarvis, and according to Mr Parker, a very promising fly-half. It’s so very disappointing honesty isn’t a quality you possess in the same abundance.”
I don’t know whether to say anything, so I don’t, this surreal numbness making everything sound all hot and fuzzy.
“I’ll be speaking with your father,” he goes on. “But in this instance, I will not press to have you excluded, if you make a public apology for your actions.”
I swallow, but my mouth is still as dry as James Bond’s martini. I have no choice. If I don’t, Dad will kill me for messing up his deal, and Chrissie… I can’t even go there. “Thank you, sir.”
He nods. “There’s no other school in the land that will put you back on the right path. It won’t be easy, but at least you’ll have a bright future you can be proud of if you have the strength of character to see this year through.”
I hear myself mumble another “Thank you, sir,” but I can’t be sure. I can’t process any of this.
“Detention for the next month,” he tells me. “No more trips and excursions, and no calls home for the rest of the term. Of course, if you admit to taking the mobile, I may consider giving you one call home a month.”
I don’t even have to think about it, even though in the silent weeks ahead, those phone calls to Beth will be the only things that stop me from going crazy. “I didn’t take the mobile, sir.”
“So you keep saying!” snaps the Head. “But that doesn’t change the fact it was found in your possession, and you forced your vulnerable sister into aiding and abetting you and put one of our most promising students in an impossible dilemma.”
When he puts it like that (if that’s how it happened), I’d hate me too, but it didn’t happen like that, and unfortunately for me, there’s nothing I can say in my defence without dragging Chrissie into all of this mess. “I’m sorry, sir.”
“So you should be,” the Head tells me. “You’re dismissed, Jarvis, and I don’t want to see you in my office again!”
Chapter 21
By the time morning assembly arrives, they all know, even without access to Twitter and Snapchat. I’m completely empty inside when the Head escorts me onto the stage. It’s probably a good thing, because I’ve forgotten all my lines.
I’m supposed to confess. Lie. But lying put me into this position, and lying isn’t going to get me out of this either. I need to be honest. Hope enough of them can see I’m telling the truth and doubt the lies being spread by the person who stole the mobile and told Spencer I’d been planning to blame Chrissie.
Taking my position right of the Head, who towers above me in the floor-length black cape behind the podium, I wait for my cue, eyes fixed on a worn floorboard. I can’t let Chrissie see how terrified I am. She’ll try to help, and I can’t…
“You all know Mr Parker’s mobile was taken without permission,” the Head begins.
Standing there in the all-consuming silence, the Head’s sombre voice resonates around the Main Hall in full Dolby surround sound.
“Richard Jarvis is the student responsible,” he continues. “He did not own up even when confronted, and the only reason I have decided not to expel him is for the simple reason that he is willing to submit to The Code.”
Hoping no one can hear my pounding heart, I try and fail again to contain the tremors in my fingers as my stomach continues to wriggle and squirm.
“Over the years, The Code has helped other students get back on the right path, and Jarvis would like to ask for your help to make him see the errors of his ways.”
That’s my cue. Somehow, not sure how, I manage to get behind the podium without tripping over my feet after that damning press statement demeaning me as a lowlife thief and coward.
“Thank you, Headmaster.” I’m talking, but just like everything else that’s happened in the last forty-eight hours, it doesn’t seem real.
“I’m sorry.” It would be so much easier to deliver the lines, confess I took it, but I’m not going to do that — even if it is going to make things a whole lot worse. “I’m sorry I didn’t go straight to Mr Parker and tell the truth.”
This isn’t going to end when school’s over. I need to clear my name. Dad made it perfectly clear last night when he shouted at me down the phone. I’ve put him in an impossible position with his new boss. I didn’t need him telling me that. I know the only thing to make things right is to find the real culprit. Spencer, he’s just playing by the rules.
“I’m truly sorry for what’s happened,” I continue, conscious my voice is now shaking so much I sound like I’m vibrating. “And I—”
“Are you sorry about trying to blame your sister too?” Baxter interrupts, glaring up at me with folded arms.
Instinct makes me turn to Chrissie, who’s sobbing into her hands as Poppy and Jones do their best to comfort her. Whoever did this, I hope they’re happy with themselves, because they haven’t just hurt me. They’ve hurt Chrissie too, and that’s unforgivable.
“You have no idea how bad I feel about hurting her,” I finally manage to reply to Baxter’s question, which is going to guarantee me a kicking from every guy here. “If you were a twin, you’d know it too.”
He doesn’t say anything, just glares at me with the full force of his hatred, but me, now I’ve seen what all of this is doing to Chrissie… I bite on my lip and suck the tears back inside. I have to stay strong. If I don’t, I’m going to crack like the other guy, and then whoever it is has won. Captain Howard never surrendered. Nor am I.
“Remorse is the first step on the path of correction,” says the Head, placing a hand on my shoulder. “Now, let’s all stand and sing hymn 24 — ‘Rock of Ages.’”
* * *
The day passed in a haze of silence, elbows, and paperclip missiles, and when everyone else was chilling out in the dorms, I was scrubbing toilets and urinals — the first of a number of humiliating detentions planned out for the month ahead.
I finally finish an hour before bed, and after failing to get the stench of piss off my hands, I find Chrissie waiting for me in the deserted and darkened corridor, still wearing her uniform.
“Are you all right?” she asks.
I shrug. It’s pointless lying to her; she can see right through me. “You shouldn’t be here. You’re not allowed to talk to me, remember?”
“I know,” she stammers, biting on her lip. “But I needed to see you.”
“I’m fine,” I say with no real conviction. “What about you?”
She doesn’t say anything at first, and my heart momentarily stops.
“You’re not getting any grief, are you?”
She shakes her head. “They just keep saying how sorry they are I’ve got you as a brother
.”
“Good,” I say, even though it makes me want to cry. “Now you better go before anyone sees you.”
“But—”
“But nothing, Chrissie.” I can already feel the first trickle of a tear as I struggle to stop myself giving in to the fear of going back to the dorm. “I’m not going through all of this so you’ll get picked on too. Why else do you think I let them think I was going to blame you?”
She shrinks back, but she still doesn’t go.
“I promised I’d look after you,” I continue, trying to make her understand. “I promised you it wouldn’t be another Goldmeads, and this was the only way to do it.”
Crying, she nods.
“Someone here really hates me,” I stammer on. “Planting Parker’s mobile in my camera bag was deliberate, and whoever told Spencer I was going to blame you is the person behind it. So be careful; the only way they can hurt me anymore is if they hurt you.”
“Okay.” She sniffs, taking a step nearer. “But they can’t mean for me to not talk to you — we’re twins.”
“I don’t think they care about things like that.” I sigh, sinking back against the wall as it all gets too much again.
“Do you remember what you said to me before we came here?”
I shake my head.
“You said I’d never be alone because I’ve always got you. Well, you have me too, and no matter what, we’re going to meet up every day — just you and me. That way you’ll know you’re not alone.”
It takes all my strength not to hug her. I always thought Chrissie needed me to look after her. I thought she was weak, but she isn’t, I see that now — her eyes are strong and bright.
“I know what it’s like, Rich,” she continues. “I’ve been there, remember?”
I know she has, and I love her too much to put her through all that again, and that’s why I pull my hand away. “You don’t have to talk to me.”
“I know,” she assures me. “But I want to.”
I look at her, really look. She’s always been so timid and scared, but she isn’t anymore. Somehow, Beth’s makeover really made her strong.
“Please, Rich,” she begs me. “Let me help you — you really don’t want to go through all of this on your own.”