“No.”
He tugs my hair harder, pulling my neck back, and slapping my ass with his other hand. The sting shocks me, making me jerk away from him. But Nate holds me in place, pinning me to his desk. “Beg me for it. Tell me how much you want my dick inside of you. Say it.”
He tilts his hips, and the movement is divine. His hard shaft is pressing into my clit, rubbing against me without pressing inside. It makes me wild, and I try to buck my hips, but he crushes me back down. Leaning forward, he whispers in my ear, “Say it.”
“No.” I want to say it. I want to beg him to do all sorts of things to me, but I want to see what he’ll do when I defy him. His hand slips around between my legs, and he touches me like he did that one time. I suck in a jagged breath at his touch and feel the pressure from his fingers on my clit, coupled with the pressure of his dick.
I shiver and try not to move, but I can’t help it. The motion is instinctive, like I couldn't do anything else even if I wanted. I push my hips back toward him, and start saying the dirtiest things, begging, pleading for him to take me. I’m a mess of carnal urges, with no idea what I’m saying, and I don’t care. I love the way he makes me feel like I'm wild, and only he can sate me. I moan and buck against him. Nate doesn’t move his hand from between my legs as he slips inside of me. I purr with delight as he presses his other hand to the center of my back. I rest my face on his desk and continue to plead with him to ride me, drive into me, and make me come.
Nate works his fingers as he pushes forward then pulls nearly all the way out. It’s fucking perfect. The slower movements are making me feel everything, every inch of his perfect dick. He slides in again, each new thrust harder and deeper. I cling to the desk, holding on tight as he rides me hard. My body is coiled tight and, as I climb higher and higher, I beg for more. I want him to fuck me, to rock into me fast and hard. I tell him, I plead with him to do it.
Nate holds onto my clit as he fucks me, making me feel everything like it’s ten times hotter and wetter than before. He said touching me like that was cheating, but I love it. I hope he cheats repeatedly. When he doesn’t let go, I’m glad. I want it. I want him. Clutching the desk, he fucks me, wildly pounding against my ass as he pounds into me. My heart is racing, and my mind is gone. I take him, all he has to offer, climbing higher and higher until I feel myself shatter. Crying out, I buck against him. Nate moves his hands, so they’re both on my waist. He pulls down hard as he drives into me harder and faster, pumping and groaning until he loses control and comes inside of me.
CHAPTER 5
Sated, I lie naked on his desk, face down, my arm hanging off the side. I should be ashamed of myself, saying the things I said, doing the things we did—but I’m not. I feel perfect, sexy, and warm all over. Nate is sitting in his chair, fingers steepled, watching me with those deep blue eyes. It’s like he can’t get enough of me, and the way he drinks in every inch of my body makes me feel beautiful.
“I got a new job,” I offer conversationally as I roll onto my side and tuck a hand under my head. My body is glistening, covered in sweat.
Nate’s eyes are still filled with lust, like he wants more. “Really? Where?”
“Le Femme.”
Nate says nothing, but the look in his eye speaks for him. He doesn’t like it. “Congratulations.”
I smirk at him. “You don’t approve.”
“Correction, I don’t share. I already told you that. If you’re with me, you’re only with me.”
“It’s not like Cole Smith is getting me, so what are you upset about?”
“I’m not upset. I’m jealous, and I don’t like the idea of other men seeing your beautiful naked body. It’s mine.” He practically growls the words.
It should piss me off but, in that moment, it turns me on. “You think I’m beautiful?”
He grins. “Are you fishing for compliments, Miss Hill?”
“Maybe.”
He leans forward and places his hands on his knees. He’s in my face, his eyes locked with mine. “Every inch of your perfect body is completely beautiful. There’s no comparison.”
I smile hard and roll onto my stomach. I reach for Nate’s pants, which are buttoned and zipped. I free him and angle his hips toward my face. I lean in and brush his hard length across my cheek, enjoying the sensation of his velvety skin on mine. Nate tenses and stops breathing as I lower my lips onto his dick, sucking it into my mouth and slowly sucking him from base to tip. The sound he makes as I do it is hypnotic. It’s a deep, guttural moan laced with pleasure so deep it makes me feel sexier. I repeat the movement, and the sound comes again.
Nate tries to step away, but I hold onto his hips. I kiss him slowly, wrapping my tongue around his shaft as he pulls out of my mouth. The movements are making me hot again, wetter than before. How is that possible? When I pull out the last time, I roll onto my back and hang my head off the desk.
“Come here,” I command, holding his hips as he steps closer.
“You’re fucking amazing, but I don’t have as much self-control as you give me credit for, Kerry. I can’t promise I won’t lose it and try and fuck your face if you keep doing that.” He’s serious, and pride lights me up from head to toe. I like making him feel as wild and sex-starved as he makes me feel.
“Then do it. I want you. I want to taste you and swallow every last drop.”
He groans my name as he steps closer, pushing his dick over my lips and into my mouth. I take all of him, sucking him, and wrapping my tongue around his shaft. He's careful at first, not pushing hard or deep, moving slowly, pushing in and pulling out. I want him to want me so desperately that he loses control. I want him to feel that freedom he gave me, so I clutch his ass and pull him down hard. His dick slips down my throat, and I inhale sharply to make sure I don’t gag. Nate groans, saying all sorts of things to me that make me do it again, and again. I take him all the way in, deeper, sucking and licking him until he’s so frenzied that he holds my face between his palms. He fucks my face, forcing his dick down my throat. The first time he does it, he freezes and tries to pull away, but I hold onto him, moaning and sucking harder. Once he knows I’m all right, he keeps going, thrusting his beautiful dick into my mouth, over my lips, and down my throat. I suck him until he’s so hard I can’t stand it. Thinking about what I’m doing to him, and hearing how much he wants me, makes me so wet. My core is throbbing, demanding to be touched but there’s no relief. I said I wanted to taste him, and I meant it. I perfect my moves until he pulses. I feel it, and suddenly my mouth is filled with his hot, sweet taste. I swallow, gently sucking as he comes, feeling it drip down my throat and lapping it up like I can’t get enough.
When he’s done, he pulls out and staggers backward, falling into his chair. His face flushes, and his eyes say everything. “Holy fuck, Kerry! When did you learn to do that?”
“Now, with you and only you.” I roll onto my stomach, pull up my ankles behind me, and bat my eyelashes at him.
“You’re perfect, fucking perfect.” He inhales deeply and stands up before kissing me softly. I roll to my side, and then onto my back when his face remains so close to mine. My knees fall apart, and Nate dips his hand in-between, feeling me, pressing inside. He mouths, “Oh my god,” and looks down at me.
I smile up at him. “That was really hot.”
“Coming in your mouth made you this wet?”
I nod and tug at his waist. “Can it be my turn again?”
Nate climbs on top of the desk and pins me down. With his hands on my wrists, he dips his face to mine, sweeping his lips across mine. “Fuck, yeah. It can be your turn for the rest of the night.”
CHAPTER 6
By the time I leave Nate’s office, we manage to fuck on the desk, the floor, the chair, and against the bookcase. There’s nowhere he can look in there and not think about me. That wasn’t my intention, but it makes me smile when I wake up the next morning. The sun fills the room, and I have my arm draped over my face.
Chel
sey is curling her hair in front of the mirror. “You were out late.” She says it flatly. Things have been weird since I hog-tied her then saved her ass. She’s not mean, but it’s like she doesn’t know how to be nice. She’s curt and sounds annoyed.
“So.”
“New boyfriend?”
“No.”
“That’s too bad. That other one was a jerk. I can’t believe he did that to you. I’m sorry, by the way—about inviting him here. I shouldn’t have.” She sets down the curling iron and looks over at me, her makeup fully applied. She’s a beautiful woman when she's not being bitchy.
“Thanks.” It means a lot that she’s apologizing.
“You deserve someone great. You really do. I’m not just saying that.”
“I know, Chelsey.” I sit up and stretch. I’m wearing a t-shirt and track shorts from the PE department.
She smiles cautiously at me, then points to my closet. “I wanted to talk to you last night, but you weren’t here, so I just went ahead and did it.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Look in your closet.” She gets up and gathers her books. “I have to run. It’s an I’m-sorry-gift. You can’t say no.” She’s out the door before I can get across the room.
When I pull open the doors to my wardrobe, it’s filled with clothes. I lift out a designer sundress, tags still on. It’s my size, in my favorite color. I shift through the hangers and notice that these are all things I would wear, in styles I like, made of fabric I adore. Chelsey didn’t haphazardly throw this together. She must have looked at my Pinterest page and pulled ideas before she went shopping. There’s easily five grand worth of clothing here, plus shoes.
I pull open a dresser drawer and find bras and panties—matching sets. Some are highly functional while others are soft and pretty. On top is a card. I pick it up and rip it open.
I’m sorry I was such a bitch. This doesn’t make up for it, but I know you lost your clothes, and I destroyed what you had left. I hope we can start over. If not, I understand. Just know I’m starting over with everyone. Thanks for introducing me to Kevin. That alone has changed my life.
Chelsey
I blink at the letter, shocked. “Holy crap! Are flying pigs skiing in Hell today or what?”
I smile and grab my bath bucket. As I head down the hall, I run into Beth. She’s leaving the bathroom as I’m heading in. She lifts one eyebrow and cautiously says, “Hey.”
“Hey,” I echo softly, letting my head tip to the side. “How are you?”
She shrugs. “Fine, I guess.” Beth starts to walk away.
I turn and call after her, “Cake and drinks tonight? My treat?”
Beth tenses and turns slowly. Her face is unreadable. I’m not sure if she’s going to chew me out or charge forward to kill me with her designer bath caddy. Death by bath caddy would suck. It’s a super-lame way to die.
She nods slowly. “Okay.”
“I’m sorry,” I say, softly.
“I know. I may have overreacted.” She walks over to me, avoiding my gaze. “I’ve seen Josh at his best and his worst. I still can’t believe he hurt anyone, but he says he did. I don’t want to see him hurt again, and I don’t want to lose another friend when you guys break up.”
“It was stupid. I shouldn’t have—”
Beth holds up a hand, silencing me. “It wasn’t my place, and you tried to respect my wishes, but who am I to stand in your way? If you guys want to get together, I’m okay with it.”
I blink at her. “Beth, that’s not—”
“It’s okay, Kerry. I know the thing with Nate isn’t serious, and you seem serious about Josh. Just don’t hurt him. He’s been through enough already, okay?” She waits for an answer, her eyes filling with worry.
“I won’t hurt him. I won’t hurt you either.” I smile at her.
Beth nods. “Then cake and drinks tonight. I’ll drive—unless you got a muzzle for that raccoon.”
“I’m not muzzling Pita.”
She laughs. “You named him after the guy from the Hunger Games? The raccoon is Peeta Bread?”
That’s really funny. I grin and chuckle. “No. His name is Pita, as in PAIN IN THE ASS. Peeta Bread.”
“What? That guy is hot!”
I swat a hand at her and push open the bathroom door. Maybe today won’t suck after all. Things with Beth are on the mend. Getting permission to screw her brother is really weird, but that problem should be gone. Now I just need to get Nate to sell his house, making a moral decision that will cause him to resent me for the rest of his life. Then I can bang Josh to get over Nate. And we’ve come full circle for needing a random hookup to get over a guy.
Perfect.
CHAPTER 7
I sit in class thinking until my head hurts. I feel Carter’s glare on the side of my face, but when I look at him, he turns away. I wasn’t with Nate last night as far as Carter knows. I kept the Fitbit on, and the only anomalies in my data were my heart rate being sky high. It didn’t record movement since Nate had my wrists pinned most of the time. Carter probably thinks I’m stressed. He knows I was in the art building, and that’s it. I need to ditch this stupid thing without Carter knowing about it.
I have no idea how to do that. The rest of the day crawls by and, around three, I’m headed across campus when I run into Josh. He’s alone, head down, hair covering his eyes. I stop in front of him. “Hey.”
He looks up, startled. He yanks a pair of earbuds from his ears and grins at me. “Hey, didn’t see you there.”
“Wow, a smile. Am I forgiven?”
He tips his head to the side. “No, but I’m sick of being mad at you.” He starts to walk away, but I grab his wrist. Butterflies whisper inside my stomach, and I let go. The way he looks at my hand makes me think he noticed too.
“Beth forgave me.”
“Good for you.”
“Did you talk to her?” I’m about to give up and walk away when he answers.
“Yeah, she said I had her permission to nail you. Isn’t that nice? Kid sisters are so thoughtful.” His caustic tone matches the smile on his face. He starts to walk past me, but I grab his elbow and whirl him around.
“I’ve had enough of your super PMS, Josh. Either we’re friends, or we’re not.” He stares at me. I glance to the side, annoyed, and let out a huff. I raise my hand, press my palm to his forehead, and shove.
“Hey! What was that for?” He swats me away.
“For being an asshole. I don’t care who you were or what you did before. I already told you that. If you don’t condemn me, I won’t condemn you.” I fold my arms over my chest and try not to tap my foot.
“You haven't done anything wrong.”
“You don’t know that. I have, and it’s bad. Take me or leave me, but I’m not doing this bitchfest with you anymore.”
He studies me, trying to figure out if I’m telling the truth. When he decides I am, he seems impressed. “Kerry Hill, you hooker, you. Did you cheat on someone? Hook up with a married man?”
Part of that is technically true. I shrug. “Rebound guy.”
He flinches. “I told you to stay away from him. You nailed him?”
I hide my face and feel squeamish. “Maybe, and then I kissed you. Beth went nuts, and here we are.”
“I kissed you, so you didn’t cheat.”
“I didn’t push you away.”
He doesn’t refute my statement or smile. It’s a fact neither of us wants to touch, lying between us like a carcass smeared on the pavement. Josh kicks the toe of his Italian loafers at the clay, moving a rock with the point of the shoe. “Is it serious? With him?”
Glancing away, I shrug and confess, “I don’t know what I want.”
His head bobs up and down like he understands. “I hear you.”
“Do you?” I’ve got my feet planted in front of him and wonder what I’m saying. He’s going to think I want to be with him. Maybe I do, a little. Maybe I want to know what being with Josh would be li
ke mainly so I can figure out what the hell I feel for Nate. That makes me a little insane. I should know how I feel, but I don’t. Since I got here, my life has been in a tailspin. Everything I thought I knew went flying out the window, and I'm still riding out the turbulence. The post-impact aftershocks have me acting like a PTSD victim. I walked away from a full crash and burn without a mark. Guilt lingers within me, making me feel directionless, like I don’t know fact from fiction anymore. I wouldn’t recognize love if it bit me on the ass. I’m so turned around and strung out I just want it to stop and settle down. I want to see who I am and what I want out of life, out of a man.
Josh watches me carefully and then lowers his eyes. “We have the same problem, don’t we?”
I’m mute for a moment, then swallow hard, trying to suppress everything that just flashed across my face. I fold my arms across my chest and inhale deeply, releasing the air in a slow, steady stream. “What’s that?”
“Neither one of us trusts ourselves anymore. You can’t tell how you feel, and I can’t promise I’ll stop.” He presses his lips together and then holds out a hand to me. “Come on.”
“Where are we going?” I slip my palm into his.
“We’re going to figure out how to get past this. I trust you, and, for some inexplicable reason, you trust me. Plus I know you can handle yourself, you’re hot, and you have mace.”
I yank my hand away, stopping on the sidewalk. Gaping at him, I ask, “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”
“What? Do you need an invitation? Yes, I’m saying let's get naked and see what happens. Either way, we’ll both have answers to the questions that have us respectively freaked out. Do you have a better idea?”
I shake my head and glance nervously to the side.
Josh remains a step away. His gaze is cautious, almost as if he regrets making the offer, but it's too late now. His words hang between us like a shopping cart full of frozen monkeys precariously poised on a high-wire, ready to fall. No one could ignore something like that. He swallows hard and spits out the question. “So, this thing—the offer.” He gestures between us. “Are you in or out?”