When he finished telling A.J. the whole story, A.J. dissolved into laughter.
“I’m glad you find it so funny,” he muttered.
“Simon, for such an intelligent, serious guy you can be such a moron sometimes.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“First of all, you said she kissed you.”
“Well, she did. But I doubt she realized what she was doing. And I didn’t have to respond.”
A.J. shook his head. “Uh huh. Does Toni strike you as the helpless female who doesn’t have a clue what she’s doing?”
He frowned. “Well, no.”
“Ding ding ding. We have a winner.”
“Shut the hell up,” he growled. “What are you getting at? Do you think she kissed me on purpose?”
“Well, unless she thought in her delirium that you were me, and she has a mega crush on me, then yeah, I’d say she meant to kiss you.”
“Then why is she avoiding me?”
“Hmmm, good question. What did you do after she kissed you?”
Heat rushed his cheeks as he remembered with great detail exactly what he’d done. How good she’d felt. And how much he’d fantasized about doing it again. He cleared his throat. “I, uh, kissed her back.”
“Yeah, and then what.”
“I came to my senses and jerked away. Then I apologized.”
He reared back when A.J. smacked him on the head. “What the hell was that for?”
“Idiot. And you wonder why she’s avoiding you.”
“I don’t get it.”
“I think that year with Starla addled your brains. You can’t have always been this stupid about women.”
“Would you quit with the insults and tell me what the hell you’re talking about?”
“You apologized. In other words, you told her, not only by your action of pulling away, but by your apology that you regretted it happening. That translates to a woman as he doesn’t want me. Doesn’t find me attractive.”
“You’re telling me, she’s pissed because she thinks I don’t want her?”
“Uh huh. And they say you’re the bright one.”
He sank down onto the bench. Did that mean she was attracted to him? “Are you saying Toni has a thing for me?”
“Look dude, the way I see it she put everything on the line and you totally shot her down. In her position, I don’t think I’d be lining up for casual conversation either.”
“Shit.”
“So tell me. How’d you feel about the kiss?”
“I’ve never experienced anything like it,” he said honestly.
“So what’s the problem?”
“The problem is I don’t want to screw up the dynamics of a really great friendship. I have more to consider than just whether things go sour between me and Toni. What happens between us directly affects the four of us.”
“Matt and I are big boys. The question you have to ask yourself is whether you’ve screwed up things by not acting.”
“So you think I should pursue her?”
“I don’t think anything. What do you want? Are you attracted to her?”
“I’ve thought of little else than making love to her for the past month,” he admitted in a rush. He glanced up to gauge A.J.’s reaction to his outburst.
A.J. grinned. “Gotten under you skin eh?”
“You could say that.”
“Aside from wanting to get her in the sack, how do you feel about her?”
He looked at A.J. like he’d grown a third head. “If you’re asking if I just want a one night stand with her I might punch you in the teeth. I’d never treat her that way.”
“If I thought you only wanted a one-nighter with her I’d punch you in the teeth. Stop worrying so much about everyone else and think about what’s best for you and Toni. The way I see it you couldn’t ask for a better girl. And she needs someone right now. If she’s interested in you then you are one lucky guy. But if you don’t get off your ass and do something about it, you’re going to lose out on the best thing that’ll ever happen to you.”
He turned and sauntered out of the locker room, leaving Simon to ponder their conversation. Was A.J. right? Could Toni be attracted to him? Had he hurt her by pushing her away?
He got up and punched the locker with a loud bang. What was holding him back? The truth was he cared a lot for Toni. And not in a little sibling capacity. But it would kill him to lose her if things didn’t work out.
But it looked as if he’d lose her by doing nothing. He needed to talk to Matt. Tell him what had happened and that he was going to pursue a relationship with Toni. This had to be handled carefully or the lives of four people could change for the worse.
He walked into the lounge searching out Matt among the group of firemen. “Can I talk to you?” he asked when he found Matt in the kitchen.
“Sure, what’s up?”
“Not here. Let’s go in the garage.”
Matt gave him a curious look but followed behind.
“Something wrong?” he asked when the two were alone.
“No, not wrong. I just wanted to talk to you about something. Give you a heads up so to speak.”
“Okay.”
He paused for a moment then looked Matt straight in the eye. “I’m interested in Toni.”
Matt’s eyes popped open wide. “Whoa. I had no idea.”
“Yeah, well I think she might be interested in me as well. I wanted you to know because I don’t want anything to mess up our friendship.”
Matt frowned slightly. “What makes you think she’s interested in you?”
Leave it to Matt to want specifics. “We, uh, kissed awhile back. I screwed things up which is why Toni’s avoiding us. Me in particular.”
“If you want my blessing, you’ve got it. I can’t imagine a better couple. But I think you’ve got a difficult road ahead. I mean she is pregnant. Are you prepared for that kind of responsibility?”
“I don’t know all of that yet,” he admitted. “This isn’t something I ever expected would happen. We’ll have to take things a day at a time and see what happens. No matter what though, I’ll always be there to help her.”