Read Seven Years to Sin Page 12


  Moving toward the front of the shop, Hester was acutely aware of how much she missed Jessica. Her sister’s presence always enhanced shopping excursions, such as the one Hester had arranged today. Jessica had a way of keeping women such as Lady Bencott in line with a carefully worded chastisement that made its point in the most genteel of ways while leaving no room for reproach. That thread of steel in Jessica was a source of envy for Hester. She did not possess the same strength as her sibling. She was the conciliatory sort, quick to ease tensions and avoid conflicts, no matter the cost to herself.

  Hester reached for the aforementioned hat perched so prettily on a stand, but paused when her gaze was caught by a figure outside. Bond Street was congested with pedestrians, as usual, and yet one form caught her attention and held it.

  The man was tall and fit, elegant, with a horseman’s thighs and shoulders requiring no padding. His dark green coat and doeskin breeches were modestly adorned but clearly expensive. He had such a confident way of moving that others instinctively made way for him. The women watched him with feminine awareness; the men moved out of his path.

  As if he felt the intensity of her regard, the man turned his head toward her. Beneath the brim of his hat, Hester saw a square jaw she would know anywhere.

  Michael. Warmth spread through her veins, a feeling she hadn’t experienced since the first time Regmont had struck her. Something inside her had numbed that day, but it stirred now, awakening.

  Dear God. When had he become such a fine specimen of a man?

  When had her childhood companion left boyhood behind? When he became Lord Tarley? Or prior to that? She so rarely saw him anymore that she couldn’t pinpoint when he might have become so formidable.

  He paused as she did, a lone stationary figure in the midst of a flurry of activity. He carried himself so beautifully, so easily. Comfortable with his height in a way her husband, who was a few inches shorter, had never been.

  Hester’s hand fell to her side. Before she quite knew what she was about, she found herself outside, waiting for Michael, who weaved through traffic en route to her with graceful impatience.

  “Good afternoon, Lord Tarley,” she said when he reached her. She was surprised her voice was so clear and steady, when she felt fuzzy headed and shaky.

  He removed his hat, revealing rich chocolate-brown hair. With a bow, he greeted her. “Lady Regmont. I am feeling most fortunate to have crossed paths with you this morning.”

  She was ridiculously pleased by the smoothly voiced platitude. “The feeling is mutual.”

  Michael looked over her shoulder into the milliner’s shop. “An afternoon with friends?”

  “Yes.” Which meant she couldn’t speak to him about the matter weighing heavily on her mind. “I must see you as soon as you can possibly spare the time. I have something I wish to discuss with you.”

  He tensed. “What is it? Is something amiss?”

  “I’ve heard about your wager with Regmont.”

  With brows raised, he said, “I won’t hurt him. Too much.”

  “It isn’t Regmont I worry about.” Michael had no notion of what sleeping beast he might awaken.

  His lips twitched, then he lost the battle and smiled in truth. The gesture took her breath away, making her realize how rarely he ever smiled around her. His reserve had always been notable. He’d never been soothed by her charm as so many others were.

  “I cannot decide,” he said, “whether to be flattered by your concern or insulted by your lack of faith in my pugilistic abilities.”

  “I cannot bear to think of you injured.”

  “I will endeavor to protect my person on your behalf. In all fairness, however, you should know that my doing so could result in injury to your husband.”

  Had he always looked at her with such warmth in his dark eyes? “Regmont is physically capable of defending himself.”

  When Michael frowned at her tone, she realized she might have revealed more than she should. She deflected his concern with distraction. “I very much enjoyed your visit the other day. I do wish you would call on me more often.”

  “I wish I could, Hester.” His voice was low and intimate, his gaze shadowed. “I will try.”

  They parted ways. It was with great force of will that Hester refrained from looking back over her shoulder when she returned to the shop. It was one thing to take a moment to speak to her sister’s brother-in-law. It would be quite another to be seen ogling after him.

  When she returned to her companions, Lady Bencott said, “The title suits Tarley.”

  Hester nodded, knowing the grief and other burdens that came with his new station.

  “With any luck, Emily,” Lady Bencott went on, “a new bonnet will catch his attention and secure you a fine match.”

  “Would that I should be so fortunate.” Em removed yet another unflattering hat from atop her lovely raven curls. “I have admired him for some time.”

  Hester felt a sharp pang in her chest at her friend’s dreamy tone. She told herself it was a symptom of increasing, not something far more complicated and impossible … like jealousy.

  “You wished to see me?”

  Michael looked up from his desk as his mother entered his study. Despite the not-inconsiderable size of the room, the Countess of Pennington’s slender frame seemed to dominate the space. It was the force of Elspeth Sinclair’s will and the command of her bearing that made her so formidable. Her strength of character was complemented by her physical beauty and elegance.

  “Yes.” He set his quill aside and stood. Rounding the mahogany desk, he gestured to one of the settees and waited for her to be seated. Then he settled across from her with a slight smile. “I have a favor to ask of you.”

  His mother studied him with a keen gaze. The recent loss of a beloved son was reflected in the depths of her dark eyes, and sadness clung to her like a shroud. “You know you have only to ask. If it is within my power to see it done, it will be.”

  “Thank you.” He collected his thoughts, pondering the best way to phrase his request.

  “How are you?” Elspeth linked her fingers in her lap and lifted her chin. Strands of silver hair lined her temples, but her face showed few signs of aging. She remained beautiful and faultlessly composed. “I have tried to give you as much privacy as I am able, but I confess, I worry over you. You have not been yourself since Benedict passed on.”

  “None of us have been.” He deflated into the seatback with a harsh exhalation.

  This conversation had been a long time coming. His mother had shown remarkable restraint in waiting so long, considering her usual need to be kept apprised of every minute detail affecting the members of her immediate family. While Pennington grieved in the country, Elspeth had arrived weeks ago, hovering on the fringes of Michael’s new life in the most unobtrusive way possible. She appeared to occupy herself with friends and social activities, but he knew the true reason why she had come—to be there as support for her remaining son as he tried, and failed, to fill the void left by his brother’s death.

  “In the most well-meaning and innocent of ways,” Michael said wearily, “we took Benedict for granted. It never occurred to any of us that he might one day leave us floundering without him.”

  “You are not floundering,” Elspeth argued. “You are more than capable of carrying your new responsibilities in your own fashion. It isn’t required that you should proceed in the same manner Benedict did. You can forge your own path.”

  “I’m trying.”

  “You’re expending great effort to squeeze yourself into the mold shaped by your brother. I pray you do not believe your father and I want you to do so.”

  Michael’s mouth twisted. “There is no finer man to emulate.”

  Her hand lifted and gestured at him, flowing gracefully and encompassing his form from his boots to his cravat. “I hardly recognized you when I first arrived. The somber hues of your new wardrobe and the sparseness of embellishment … It isn’t you.”
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  “I am not simply a Sinclair any longer,” he retorted, somewhat defensively. “I am Tarley and one day—God willing, a faraway day—I will be Pennington. A certain restraint and decorum is required.”

  “Stuff and nonsense. What is required is your sanity and happiness. Your unique abilities and viewpoints are more valuable to the title than slavish adoption of your brother’s sensibilities.”

  “Sanity is a luxury I must earn. Presently, I am barely keeping pace. I have no notion how Benedict met all his obligations, but by God, the amount of work to be done seems overwhelming at times.”

  “You should rely on the estate stewards more. You don’t have to do everything yourself.”

  “Yes, I do, until I know enough to allow someone else to manage. I cannot place the responsibility for our family’s financial stability in the hands of hired employees simply because it simplifies my life and saves me the trouble of rectifying my ignorance.” Michael looked around the room, feeling like a fraud in the space that was imbued with the very essence of his brother. The somber reds and browns were not what he would have chosen for himself, but he’d changed nothing since taking over the space. He felt as if he lacked the right to do so, as well as the will. “And unlike Benedict, I don’t even have Calypso to worry over, yet I still feel as if I am hanging on by the tips of my fingers.”

  Elspeth shook her head. “I remain ambivalent about your brother’s bequeathment of such a large obligation to Jessica.”

  “She will want for nothing for the rest of her life.”

  “Her per annum stipend alone is sufficient to make her a very wealthy widow. That plantation was the bulk of your brother’s personal income for good reason—it consumed a great deal of his time and attention. The burden of maintaining the property will likely be too great for her to bear. The mere thought of facing such a challenge is daunting to me.”

  “He discussed it with me prior to finalizing his will, and I understood his mind.”

  “Then explain it to me.”

  “He loved her,” he said simply. “He claimed there was something about the island that affected her; an alteration to her countenance and personality he wished to foster. He wanted her to feel the power of self-sufficient affluence, if she should ever have to go on without him. Something about her being restrained and needing absolute freedom, or some such.”

  “He meant well, I suppose, but she should be here with us. It pains me to think of her alone.”

  Michael seized the opportunity to segue into the reason he’d summoned her. “Her sister, Lady Regmont, feels similarly. And speaking of Hester, I am led to the point where I ask a favor of you.”

  “Yes?”

  “I should like you to deepen your association with her. Draw her into your social circle. Spend more time with her, if you would.”

  Elspeth’s brows rose. “She is charming, of course, but there are a notable number of years between us. I am not certain our interests are aligned.”

  “Try.”

  “Why?”

  Leaning forward, he set his forearms on his knees. “I fear something is not right with her. I need your opinion. If I am correct, you would note it straightaway.”

  “I meant, why the interest in Lady Regmont in particular? Because of Jessica?”

  “Certainly easing Jessica’s mind would please me,” he prevaricated. “The sisters care a great deal about one another.”

  “Which is expected and laudable. Yet I still fail to see why the welfare of Regmont’s wife is your concern.” Her tone was more warily curious than argumentative. “If there is anything requiring attention, Regmont will see to it. You, on the other hand, need a spouse of your own to occupy you.”

  Groaning, Michael’s head fell back and his eyes closed. “Is marrying me off all anyone can think about these days? The gossip rags are rife with speculation over my intentions, and now I cannot even enjoy a respite in my own home!”

  “Isn’t there any woman who appeals to you?”

  Absolutely. As you’ve so astutely surmised, I am mad for another man’s wife. He straightened. “Enough of this. I am well. Our affairs are well. There is no need for concern in any respect. I am tired and feeling ill equipped, but I’m learning quickly, and soon all will be as second nature to me. Settle your mind, if you would, please.”

  His mother stood and moved over to the bell pull, her peach-hued satin skirts rustling as she moved. “I feel the need for a strong cup of tea.”

  Michael felt the need for something much stronger.

  “So.” Elspeth’s tone was resigned. “Tell me what rouses your concern over Lady Regmont.”

  He felt precious little satisfaction over gaining his mother’s capitulation. What cause would Hester have to dread an amateur bout of pugilism between two civilized gentlemen? The recollection of the imploring, almost-fearful look on her face when they’d spoken earlier was still fresh. And troubling.

  “She is gaunt and far too pale. She seems overly delicate, both physically and otherwise. It isn’t like her. She was always vivacious … full of energy and life.”

  “Men rarely take note of such things about their own wives, let alone another man’s.”

  Holding up his hand, he warded off further speculative admonishments. “I know my place and hers. Note that I am placing this matter in your hands. My mind will be eased by your assistance, allowing me to return my focus to affairs falling within my purview.”

  A white-capped maid appeared in the open doorway, and Elspeth ordered a tea service. Then she returned to her former seat, straightening her skirts as she sat. “Your widely gazetted boxing match against Regmont suddenly takes on new meaning. I thought it wasn’t at all like the new man you’ve become to risk censure from the magistrates. I was actually hopeful it was a sign of the old Michael returning.”

  “You are seeing motives that aren’t there. And it isn’t a match, which—as you pointed out—would be frowned upon by the magistrates. We’ve simply agreed to practice the sport together.”

  She shot him a mother’s exasperated look. “You cannot tell me I don’t see how you fidget with the fob of your pocket watch, or tap your right foot against the floor. Those are long-standing habits of yours, which you have managed to suppress in the last year. Yet thinking of and talking about Lady Regmont reawakens those dormant tendencies. She has a profound effect on you.”

  Michael scrubbed a hand over his face. “Why do women insist on ascribing deep meaning to random events?”

  “Because we take note of life’s details, which men fail to do. That is why women are cleverer than men.” She bared her pristinely white teeth in an overly sweet smile.

  He grew wary due to familiarity with that particular smile and the mischief it portended.

  “I will see to Hester for you,” she said in a honeyed tone. “For a price.”

  Right. He knew it. “What will it cost me?”

  “You must allow me to introduce you to some suitable young ladies.”

  “Bloody hell,” he snapped. “Can you not simply act out of the kindness of your heart?”

  “Kindness for you. You are overworked, overtired, and underappreciated. Not surprisingly, you find yourself drawn to someone who is familiar and comfortable.”

  Realizing that arguing against her points would only work against him, Michael kept his mouth shut and pushed to his feet. Tea was most definitely not going to be sufficient for him. Benedict’s cognac in the bookcase behind the desk was far more appealing. He approached the wall of books and bent to open one of the carved wooden cabinet doors lining the bottom row.

  “Good that you aren’t speaking,” she went on, “because you should be listening. I married a Sinclair male and raised two more; I know precisely how you are built.”

  He’d stopped pouring at the halfway point, but decided to continue to the rim. “We are built differently from other men?”

  “Some men choose their mates with their reason, weighing the benefits and detriments i
n a purely analytical manner. Others—like your friend Alistair Caulfield—respond to physical attractions. But Sinclair men choose from here”—she tapped her chest above her heart—“and once the choice is made, they are hard to dissuade.”

  Michael tossed back the contents of his glass in two gulps.

  Elspeth made a chastising clucking noise with her tongue. “It was years before your grandmother truly accepted me. She thought I was too hardheaded and intractable for a woman, but your father would not be denied his choice.”

  “I wonder why she thought that.”

  “And Jessica … I love her as if she was my own child, but I had reservations about her in the beginning. She is the type of individual one can never truly know well, but Benedict would not be gainsaid.”

  “And he was very content.”

  “Was he? Why then was he still making such grand efforts, like the bequeathment, to reveal a deeper side of her? It is the nature of love to wish to possess the other person completely—body and soul. I think it likely that he would have eventually grown resentful of her inability to share herself. Regardless, their match is no longer a concern. You are the one who is attached to an inappropriate love interest. You are the one who requires a new object of affection. It is the best way to recover from unrequited love.”

  “I have larger issues to address.”

  “Perhaps you could have remained a bachelor previously, but no longer.”

  Michael stared down at the tumbler in his hand, tilting it to and fro to catch the light from the large window to his left. Of all the duties he’d acquired along with the Tarley title, it was the need to wed and bed a suitable spouse that most pained him. He would be tying himself into a fraud he would have to perpetuate for the rest of his life. Just the thought of it was disheartening and exhausting.

  “See to Lady Regmont,” he said grimly. “Give her whatever counsel or sympathetic ear she may need, for as long as she may need it. In return, I will make myself available to your matchmaking.”

  Elspeth’s mouth curved. “Done.”