Chapter Nine
"And so we commence," Christian said, his voice rich with satisfaction, desire, and just a hint of very flattering longing.
Now that I had committed myself to this, now that I had agreed to do everything my body ached to do, I felt uncomfortable, awkward, gauche. I didn't know what to do. Should I be the one to start things rolling, since I had made such a big deal about being in control? Or should I wait until Christian made the first move? The problem was, none of my past experience could be called on for help. All of the other men I'd been with -
"You will forget them," Christian said as his fingertips brushed my jaw. "There is you, and there is me, and there is no one else. "
I started hyperventilating. What a stupid time for a panic attack!
"I'm sorry, Christian. " I gasped, wrapping my arms around myself. "I'm very sorry, but I don't think I can do this. "
"My brave one, my goddess," he murmured, gently enveloping me in his arms. His hands stroked my back as he nuzzled my hair. "You are distressing yourself to no purpose. If you are not ready for this, we shall simply wait until tomorrow night. If you are not ready then, we will wait for the following night, and so on until you feel the time is right. "
"I'm only here for a little more than two weeks. " I wheezed into his collarbone, the shaking within me slowly abating at the gentle strokes of his hand on my back. I pressed a little closer to him, wanting to breathe in his wonderful masculine scent.
"Do not worry about the future when the present holds such promise. "
I shivered with the feeling of his soft breath in my ear, finally pulling a little bit away and looking at a spot just to the side of his face. "Thank you for understanding. I think I'd like to. . . er. . . give it a try. The only thing is" - I swallowed back a lump approximately the size of Rhode Island - "I'm not quite sure what to do next. Should I. . . um. . . " I looked at the bed.
He smiled and pulled me toward the armchair, tugging me down onto his lap. "Why don't we try this first? It was enjoyable at the restaurant; it should be so here, too, yes?"
I gave him a watery smile, relaxing against him. He was giving me a choice, and had said he would stop at any time. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.
Your faith in my ability to stir your passion humbles me, he murmured in my mind, pulling me forward and kissing my lips until they parted for him.
The day you're humble is the day hell will freeze over, I answered, kissing him back.
I have been to hell, his mind whispered into mine. His tongue teased my lips until I had to send my own out to tell his to stop fooling around and get down to proper tongue work. It is not a very likely place to freeze.
No comment. I giggled.
He kissed me thoroughly, let me kiss him just as thoroughly, and then engaged in a bit of a tongue tussle as we tried to outdo each other and push the fire burning between us to new heights.
By the time we finished I was squirming against him, my fingers tangled in his hair, tugging on it in silent demand that he take care of the ache that he had started.
"What do you want, my demanding one?" he asked, his lips nuzzling and nipping at an hitherto unknown sensitive spot on my collarbone.
I released the earlobe I was gnawing on and looked down into his ebony eyes. "I want to touch you. And I want you to touch me. "
His tongue painted a line across my collarbone. "It shall be as you order. "
He stood up with me in his arms, letting me slide down his body until I was once again on my feet. I took a quick moment to assess my feelings, and decided I was in no danger, not threatened or feeling stifled as I had with other men. Christian had done everything he promised, holding back his own natural tendency to be the one in charge to allow me the time to proceed in a manner and a pace that left me burning with desire and wanting.
"You're a very clever man. " I smiled against his lips.
One glossy eyebrow rose. "And you have only just discovered this?"
His head dipped to take possession of my mouth once again, and I sagged against him, welcoming the solid strength of his arms, since my legs had apparently gone boneless and turned to jelly when I wasn't looking.
"Do you wish for me to undress for you, or would it please you to undress me?"
I rubbed up against him, feeling wanton and wicked and extremely like a temptress who was no better than she should be. "Which would drive you wild with excitement?"
His hands spread out to cup my breasts. "Definitely the latter. "
I leaned into his hands for a moment, astounded that breasts could feel so good in a man's hands, then pulled back and gave Christian a wicked smile. "Then that is what we will do. Let's see. . . where shall I start. . . tie. "
"An excellent choice," Christian said as I kissed his neck, his hands sliding up around my hips. I stepped back.
"No. "
Both eyebrows went up at that. "No?"
"No. No hands. I get to undress you without you touching me. "
One side of his mouth quirked up in question.
"If you start touching me again, I won't be able to concentrate on driving you wild, and I very much want to do that. So no hands. "
He dropped his hands, his eyes turning the heat up a notch. I fanned myself. "It's getting a bit hot in here, isn't it? Okay, so I was at your tie. Um. . . right, one tie, blue. " I set the tie on the chair, then stepped back to consider him, ignoring the obvious bulge in his pants where men are wont to get a bit bulgy. "That's a very handsome jacket, but I think it'll have to go as well. "
"I am perfectly agreeable with your decision. "
I slipped his jacket off, tugging it down over his arms and laying it carefully across the back of the chair. I turned to eye him. "Shoes next, I think. "
I knelt down and untied his shoelaces, pulling off first one shoe, then the other. I refused to look up. I knew what was at eye level. "Well, while I'm down here, we might as well do the socks, too. "
He obligingly held up his foot while I pulled his sock off. I let my fingers trail down the long length of his feet, then repeated the action with his second foot.
"You have nice feet. "
"Thank you. I have few complaints of them. "
"Some men have hairy toes and ugly bits, but yours are nice. " I gave both feet a little pat, then without looking at his midsection, stood up. "Vest next. "
"Most assuredly so. "
I slipped the vest off his arms, making sure to touch as much of him as I could. I looked at him and tipped my head to the side. "Are you wild with excitement yet?"
He shook his head. "Not yet. You will have to try harder. "
Ah, a challenge. I loved a challenge. I smiled to myself. "Shirt, I think. "
He saw the smile and answered it with one of his own. "I look forward to that with the utmost expectations of enjoyment. "
"Button one. Why, look, there's skin behind it!" I kissed the exposed hollow of his throat. He sucked in a big wad of air. "Button two. Oooh, chest hair. Nice. " I kissed the bit of chest I'd uncovered, and moved down the line. "Button three. More chest hair, imagine that. "
"I'm imagining, I'm imagining. " He groaned as I licked a trail down the vee of flesh I'd bared. His hands were clenching and unclenching at his sides. I grinned up at him. "You're being so good, I don't think it's fair of me to tease you anymore. "
"If you stop, I'll die," he said, his velvet voice rough with emotion.
"Oh, well, I wouldn't want that," I mumbled against his chest as I unbuttoned the next four buttons in quick succession. I crouched before him, holding on to his hips as I laved his belly button, watching with delight as his stomach muscles contracted under my touch. I stood up and tugged his shirt out of his pants, trailing my fingers across his chest.
"Hand," I ordered, holding out my own. He put his hand in mine. I looked at it. It was a large hand, long-fingered and sensitive. "Cuff link one. " I switched hands. "Cuff link two. And now. . . "
> I slid my hands up his belly, over the planes of his chest, over his shoulders, then down his arms, pushing the shirt off as I did so, pressing little kisses along a line to his collarbone. It was so much fun, I spent a little time doing that, but there was still more package to unwrap. I picked the shirt up and tossed it onto the chair, turning back to face that part of him that I'd been avoiding looking at.
"I'll say one thing, you look a lot better without the cuts. Will you tell me what you were doing there that night?"
"Later," he said, his beautiful voice thick with unspoken emotion.
My stomach wadded itself up into a little ball, feeling not at all like a stomach should feel. I stood looking at him, wondering if I were going to throw up, or if it was just a level of arousal that I'd never felt.
"Allegra, if you do not wish to do this. . . "
He really was going to give me an out; I could see it in his eyes.
"No, I want to. I guess your belt is next. "
He said nothing, but his eyes spoke volumes.
I stepped forward and bit my lip as I unbuckled his belt, pulling it free from his pants and setting it on the chair with the rest of his clothes.
"That leaves just your pants. Are you. . . um. . . wearing underwear?"
His eyes darkened. "I shall let you determine the answer to that question. "
I looked deeply into his eyes and told myself it was up to me. I didn't have to do anything I didn't want to do. I placed my hand on his zipper and felt him jump. The part behind the zipper, that is. "I would say no on the underwear question. "
His eyebrows rose. It took both hands, but at last I managed to unbutton the waistband and grab the little zipper tab, pulling it down as I stared into his eyes.
He boinged into my hands.
"Oh," I said as I looked down, thinking that when I'd seen him before, he must have been really cold. "My. Um. Okay. I'll just. . . um. . . hoo!" I tore my eyes from his genitals and gently pushed his pants down his hips, carefully avoiding hitting my face on his erection as I tugged the material off each leg.
"Well, I guess that's it," I said a bit breathlessly as I tossed his pants onto the chair, unable to tear my gaze from his rampant parts. A thought suddenly intruded on my visual examination. I wetted my lips. "You're not going to want me to. . . um. . . "
Christian tipped my chin up. "I don't want you to do anything you don't desire. "
Instantly I felt better. "Good. Because I've never really liked. . . well, good. Can I. . . would you mind if I just touched you?"
"I would very much enjoy that," he said gravely. I glanced quickly at his face to see if he was laughing at me, but there wasn't anything there but desire and want and approval.
He was hot and silky and hard.
"Um. You're not. . . er. . . circumcised. "
"No, I'm not. "
"Oh. I noticed, because that bit just there isn't anything I've seen before. What am I supposed to do with the extra bit?"
"What would you like to do with it?"
I contemplated the extra bit. "Well. . . does this do anything for you?"
The veins stood out on his neck. "Yes, yes, it does. You may do that anytime you are struck with the desire. "
I smiled, rather proud of myself. I can honestly say it's not often I've made a man's eyes cross with just two fingers. I let my fingers do a little more walking, even daring to investigate the surrounding scenery. It was all very enjoyable, much more than I had ever imagined. Christian was just. . . right. It felt right to touch him.
"Are you finished?" Christian inquired politely as I gave his penis a fond pat. I looked up, concerned. His lovely, rich voice suddenly sounded as if he were gargling marbles.
"For now, unless you don't want me to do that again. "
He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, then opened them back up. "I can honestly say that the possibility of you repeating your actions will remain at the top of the list of events I fervently pray will occur. Frequently. Daily, if not hourly. "
"Oh," I smiled, pleased with myself. "Good. "
"And now," he said, taking another deep breath and making an effort to smooth out the marbles to his usual silky smoothness, "I believe it is my turn. Would you enjoy it more if you undressed yourself, or would you prefer for me to do it?"
My breath caught and held as my mind squirreled around and around with the question. I reminded myself that I'd done things with Christian that I'd never enjoyed before, and that remaining in control did not mean one had to be a coward and take the easy path. "I think I'd like you to undress me. If you'd like to, that is. I don't want to force you. "
He swooped down on me with a noise deep in his chest that made something in my belly respond. His hands were everywhere, touching me, teasing me, plucking and pulling and unzipping and sliding my clothing off with such heated touches and whispered words of pleasure and little love nibbles that before I could catch my breath, I stood naked before him.
All of me.
Including my bad leg.
"Eeek," I said, hunching over and trying to cover up the length of scarred flesh.
"I did not eek when you stared at me - stared for at least an eternity - thus you are not allowed to hide yourself from me. "
"You're telling me what to do," I told my kneecap, my arms around my leg.
"I'm simply pointing out that what was fair for you is fair for me, Allegra. "
I looked up as the teasing tone faded from his voice. He held his hand out for me. "Let me see you. "
"My leg is ugly. "
"Only if you believe it to be. Let me see you. "
Oh, how I wanted to believe he wouldn't look at all the ugly white, twisted tissue and not flinch. If anyone can do it, Christian can, an optimistic part of my mind said.
"Okay. I'm going to straighten up. But if you stare at anything below my waist for more than two seconds, I'm leaving. Deal?"
"As you like. "
I put my hand in his and let him haul me upright. His eyes burned into mine as he pulled me up against his body, never once looking down at the rest of me. There is no part of you that I will not worship as is your due. You are beauty and grace and everything a man can desire.
I shifted as my nipples hardened against the soft brush of his chest hair. I caught an echo in my mind, a thought that I suspected he did not intend for me to hear.
And you are mine.
I decided to let it go. He had kept his word, was making me feel desirable and excited and wanting more from him than I'd ever wanted from a man, and all without feeling as if I were directed, controlled, just a bystander in the event. I made a seductive little purring sound I didn't know I could make, and rubbed up against him. "You're poking me. "
His hands stroked up my behind to wrap around my waist, pulling me tighter against his arousal. His breath was hot on my ear as he kissed a hot path up my neck. "I wish to make love to you; I wish to join our bodies and minds in the manner of Moravians. If you tell me to stop, I will, but understand that I will likely die in the process. "
I slid my fingers through his hair and licked his lips. I had no need to hesitate over the decision. I knew then that I could trust Christian to hold to his word no matter how intense things became. "Yes, please. "
He kissed me, his mouth taking possession in a way I had no objection to, scooping me up and carrying me to the mammoth bed, laying me down on cool satin sheets that rubbed erotically against my skin. He moaned as he followed me down on the bed, his hands and mouth stroking my breasts and belly until I was squirming with need.
"I'm sure foreplay is a very good thing, and I will be sure to appreciate it another time, but you know, I think right this moment I want something a little more substantial," I said, all without breathing. Christian was nibbling my belly, his hair trailing down my skin, leaving rivulets of fire behind. I squirmed against him as he looked down at the really personal part of me, then up to my face.
"Command me. "
/>
I blinked and squirmed a bit more. "What?"
"Tell me what you want me to do. "
I made an exasperated noise. "This is your revenge, right? You want me to command you to make love to me? You want to hear the actual words?"
"I would know exactly what you want me to do, yes. I am yours. Tell me what you want of me. "
I sighed. "Okay, fine, whatever. I command you to make love to me. There, are you happy now?"
"Make love to you how?"
I stopped stroking his arm and poked him in the shoulder. "Do I have to draw you a picture?"
He shook his head, causing his hair to feather out over my belly. I shivered and tried to will him up my body. "Just tell me what you want. "
I rubbed my legs up alongside his legs, uncaring for the moment that the scars were plainly visible. "I want to feel you, all of you. "
"Yes? Where?" he asked as he slid forward along my body until his mouth was level with my breasts. He paused to pay tribute to them. I arched my back and parted my legs wider, sliding them up his thighs.
"I want to feel you pressed against me. "
He moved up until his mouth was on my collarbone. "And?"
I want to feel you inside of me.
His hands cupped my hips as he moved up higher, the hard length of him parting those delicate parts of me that I'd previously considered purely functional.
There was a delicious sort of stretching as my body accommodated his, and then he opened his mind to me, flooding me with the feelings of heat and tightness and overwhelming pleasure that he felt. I wrapped my legs around his hips as he started to move within me, kissing his neck and clutching at his back as every tiny little atom of my body joined with his in absolute ecstasy. I drowned in his pleasure and fed him my own, pushing us both higher as our bodies danced in a rhythm that left us both straining, moving to please ourselves, moving to please each other, pushing our bodies together harder and faster until I felt us bursting into a white blaze of rapture. I heard Christian sing my name just before his teeth pierced the flesh beneath my ear. I arched against him, still locked in our shared orgasm, driven past that point by the exultation he felt as he feasted on my blood. What should have been a forbidden, repulsive act was instead erotic, wild, carnal, and built within me a need I hardly dared put a name to.
His tongue was hot on my neck, pulling me back from the euphoria our joining had brought.
I lay trembling with wonderful little aftershocks, holding tightly to him, reveling in his ragged breath and heaving chest, warm and safe and for the first time in my life, truly at peace.
What have you done? I asked, a languid hand lazily stroking the hard curves of his behind. What have you done to me?
He lifted his head and looked down at me, his lips brushing a gentle salute on mine, his eyes burning red and gold and brown, more variations of color than I'd thought existed. Slowly, ever so slowly, his lips curled up in an extremely smug, thoroughly male smile. The expression is, I believe, "rocked your world. "
I bit his shoulder as he rolled us over. "You bit me. "
"You bit me, as well. "
"But I didn't guzzle down your blood. "
"I did not guzzle, I never guzzle. I sipped. Carefully. Worshipfully. Gratefully. "
I looked up from where my cheek was pressed against Christian's heart. The bed might be the very height of comfort, but he was much more comfortable. "Worshipfully, eh? What did I taste like?"
He smiled one of his patented lazy smiles. "Like a woman who doesn't know the depth of her own passion. "
"Beast," I said, settling back down on his chest.
His hands were warm on my behind. "And have I captured Beauty?"
I shifted upward until I had my chin resting on my hands, stacked together on his breastbone. "I might be inclined to answer that if you answer a few more of my questions first. "
His hands trailed up my back, making random little swirly patterns that were sending shivers of heat out from my belly to every point on my body. "Would I be correct in guessing that the first question was what I was doing in the basement of the inn, naked and covered in ninety-four cuts?"
"You would. " I nodded, breathing a little heavier as his hands moved downward again to paint circles on my behind. "Ninety-four? How do you know there were ninety-four cuts?"
He closed his eyes. "Because I made them. "
I frowned up at him, waiting for the rest of the explanation.
"Christian?"
"You've worn me out with your lustful demands. I'm sleepy. "
"Vampires don't get sleepy. Tell me about your plan in the inn. "
He gave a gentle little snore. I turned my head and took one pert little brown nipple in my mouth. His eyes shot open. I pulled away long enough to say, "If you value this nipple's life, you'll finish answering the question. "
He sighed in mock regret. "I have unleashed a dragon. "
"I have always been a dragon; I was just hidden in an innocent maiden's form. Why did you cut yourself ninety-four times and lie bleeding, if not to death, then at least to a weakened state that had to be dangerous?"
"Because I had arranged through a contact that you do not need to know about for Guarda White and Eduardo Tassalerro to hear that another Dark One had been caught and was being held in an extremely weakened state in the basement of an old, abandoned inn. "
"Weakened, hence the need to appear as if you had lost lots of blood. "
His hands slid off my behind, lower, to the tops of my thighs.
"Exactly. Unfortunately, just as White and Tassalerro arrived to examine the bait, a plucky Summoner came to save me from the horrors of eternal torment. "
His fingers slid between my thighs, heading into an area that had me opening my eyes up very wide.
"Eep. "
"There is something deeply erotic about a woman who mutters sweet nothings of the eep caliber into the chin of her partner. "
His fingers delved. They parted. They stroked. They did things that I had no idea fingers could do in the parts in question. Oh, I knew they could, I just didn't know they could, if you get my drift. I shifted and squirmed and wiggled around on him, feeling him harden beneath me as his fingers moved to a seductive dance in my heated flesh.
I sat up, ignoring the stab of pain in my leg as I straddled him, my thighs on either side of his hips as I looked down at the man beneath me. His eyes were open now, hot with need and passion, bright with longing so strong it stripped the breath from my lungs.
I wrapped my fingers around his hard length and leaned forward, swirling my tongue around the previously abused nipple. "Tell me what you want, Christian. "
He moaned. You.
I stroked him as I kissed my way over to his other nipple. I suckled on it for a moment, scraping it gently with my teeth, enjoying the sound of him sucking in his breath. "Tell me what you want me to do to you, Christian. "
His hands shifted to my hips, gripping them as he lifted me straight up in the air. I looked down. He was poised beneath me. I want you, Allegra.
I reached down and teased him, pushing back the extra bit of skin and running my fingers around in investigative circles. You want me how?
He lowered me as I directed him where I wanted him, his hardness nudging aside all the now tingly bits of me to push into the welcoming heat of my body. I want you around me, in me, joined with me. I want to feel our hearts beat together, our breaths merged until they cannot be separated, our minds one.
Yes, I cried as I sank down upon him, sobs of pleasure catching in my throat. The darkness within him swirled around us and in us until he was torn between the joy of our joining and the pain of his torment. I moved upon him, finding a rhythm that I knew through our joined minds pleased him as much as it did me, and fed him my pleasure as I accepted his. Despair shadowed us until I opened my heart and took it into me, molding it, warping it, changing it into an intense sense of satisfaction that sank deep into our bones.
You are light, you are salvation, Christian breathed into my mind as our bodies quickened the pace, racing now for that final moment of completion so perfect it brought tears of happiness to my eyes. You take my pain and give me only joy.
I opened my eyes, wanting to see his as we reached our climax together, wanting to see deep inside him to the emptiness I knew I could fill.
You were created for me.
His eyes were an impossible, glowing midnight, so filled with emotion it almost hurt to look into them. Ecstasy coiled tighter and tighter within me until I felt as if I were going to fracture into a thousand pieces. Beneath me Christian's need built, raging through him, burning hot and hard, burning just for me. I leaned down over him, offering myself, wanting, needing him to take what only I could give him.
I cannot live without you.
His teeth pierced the skin above my breast, the sensation of pleasure so strong it pushed me over the edge until we were one body, one mind, one being as we succumbed to the power of our passion.
Beloved, his mind echoed in mine as we burned bright for an eternity. You are my Beloved.