Being a two-part message, it didn't entirely register right away. For a moment he looked happy. Then his face started to turn red.
She leaned in close again. "Don't worry, though. I'm leaving you. I'll let you know where to mail the divorce papers. Now, you get back to work."
She started to walk away. "Randi," he called after her.
"Not your fault, Bob!" she called over her shoulder. "Nothing was your fault. You're a great guy."
She felt liberated as she walked back through the store. Her mood was so generous and expansive that she bought a little container of lip balm and a bottle of water. The tiny amount of profit from the sale would be her last contribution to Bob's life.
Then she got into the car and drove south, because that way was a right turn coming out of the parking lot, and traffic was too heavy to wait for a chance to go left. She'd drive wherever the currents of the traffic led her. She wouldn't try to hide from anybody. She'd let Bob know where she was as soon as she decided she was there, and she'd divorce him in a perfectly ordinary way. But she wouldn't bump into anyone she knew or anyone who knew her. She would become effectively invisible, not like someone trying to hide, but like someone who had nothing to hide at all but who never became important to anyone.
Except to her beloved son.
3
COUP
From: JulianDelphiki%
[email protected] To: Volescu%
[email protected] Re: Why keep hiding when you don't have to?
Look, if we wanted you dead or punished, don't you think it would have happened already? Your protector is gone and there's not a country on Earth that will protect you if we lay out the facts of your "achievements."
What you did, you did. Now help us find our children, wherever you've hidden them.
Peter Wiggin had brought Petra Arkanian with him because she knew Caliph Alai. They had both been in Ender's Jeesh together. And it was Alai who had sheltered her and Bean in the weeks before the Muslim invasion of China--or liberation of Asia, depending on which propaganda mill you shopped at.
But now it seemed that having Petra with him meant nothing at all. Nobody in Damascus acted as if it even mattered that the Hegemon had come like a supplicant to see the Caliph. Not that Peter had arrived with any publicity--this was a private visit, with him and Petra passing themselves off as a tourist couple.
Complete with bickering. Because Petra had no patience with him. Everything he did and said and even thought was wrong. And last night, when he finally demanded, "Tell me what you really hate about me, Petra, instead of pretending it's all this trivial stuff."
Her answer had been devastating: "Because the only difference I ever saw between you and Achilles was that you let others do your killing for you."
It was so patently unfair. Peter had devoted himself to trying to avoid war.
At least now he knew why she was so furious at him. When Bean went into the besieged Hegemony compound to face Achilles alone, Peter understood that Bean was putting his own life on the line and that it was extremely unlikely that Achilles would give him what he had promised--the embryos of Bean's and Petra's children that had been stolen from a hospital soon after in vitro fertilization.
So when Bean put a .22 slug through Achilles's eye and let it bounce around a few dozen times inside his skull, the only person who absolutely got everything he needed was Peter himself. He got the Hegemony compound back; he got all the hostages safely returned; he even regained his tiny army trained by Bean and led by Suriyawong, who had turned out to be loyal after all.
While Bean and Petra did not get their babies, and Bean was dying, Peter couldn't do a thing to help either of them except provide office space and computers for them to conduct their search. He also used all his connections to get them whatever cooperation he could from the nations where they needed access to records.
Right after Achilles's death, Petra had simply been relieved. Her irritation with Peter had developed--or merely resurfaced--in the weeks after, as she saw him trying to reestablish the prestige of the office of Hegemon and try to put together a coalition. She began making snotty little comments about Peter playing in his "geopolitical sandbox" and "outstrutting the heads of state."
He should have expected that actually having her travel along with him would only make it worse. Especially because he wasn't following her advice about anything.
"You can't just show up," she told him.
"I have no choice."
"It's disrespectful. As if you think you can drop in on the Caliph. It's treating him like a servant."
"That's why I brought you," Peter patiently explained. "So you can see him and explain that the only way this can happen is if it's a secret meeting."
"But he already told me and Bean that we couldn't have access to him like we used to. We're infidels. He's Caliph."
"The Pope sees non-Catholics all the time. He sees me."
"The Pope isn't Muslim," said Petra.
"Just be patient," said Peter. "Alai knows we're here. Eventually he'll decide to see me."
"Eventually? I'm pregnant, Mr. Hegemon, and my husband is dying in a big way, ha ha ha, and you're wasting some of the time we have together and that pisses me off."
"I invited you to come. I didn't compel you."
"It's a good thing you didn't try."
But now it was out. In the open. Clear at last. Of course she was really irritated at all the things she complained about. But underneath it all was resentment about how Peter had let Bean do his killing for him.
"Petra," said Peter. "I'm not a soldier."
"Neither is Bean!"
"Bean is the finest military mind alive," said Peter.
"So why isn't he Hegemon?"
"Because he doesn't want to be."
"And you do. And that's why I hate you, since you asked."
"You know why I wanted this office and what I'm trying to do with it. You've read my Locke essays."
"I also read your Demosthenes essays."
"Those also needed to be written. But I intend to govern as Locke."
"You govern nothing. The only reason you even have your little army is because Bean and Suriyawong created it and decided to let you have the use of it. You only have your precious compound and all your staff because Bean killed Achilles and gave it back to you. And now you're back to putting on your little show of importance, but you know what? Nobody's fooled. You're not even as powerful as the Pope. He's got the Vatican and a billion Catholics. You've got nothing but what my husband gave you."
Peter didn't think this was quite accurate--he had labored for years to build up his network of contacts, and he had kept the office of Hegemon from being abolished. Over the years he had made it mean something. He had saved Haiti from chaos. Several small nations owed their independence or freedom to his diplomatic and, yes, military intervention.
But certainly he was on the verge of losing it all to Achilles--because of his own stupid mistake. A mistake that Bean and Petra had warned him about before he made it. A mistake that Bean had rectified only at a grave risk.
"Petra," said Peter, "you're right. I owe everything to you and Bean. But that doesn't change the fact that whatever you think of me and whatever you think of the office of Hegemon, I hold that office, and I'm trying to use it to avoid another bloody war."
"You're trying to use your office to make your office into 'dictator of the world.' Unless you can figure out a way to extend your reach out to the colonies and become 'dictator of the known universe.'"
"We don't actually have any colonies yet," said Peter. "The ships are all still in transit and will be until we're all dead. But by the time they arrive, I'd like them to send their ansible messages back home to an Earth that is united under a single democratic government."
"It's the democratic part I missed," said Petra. "Who elected you?"
"Since I don't have any actual authority over anybody, Petra, how can it possibly matter if I'm not legitima
tely authorized?"
"You argue like a debater," she said. "You don't actually have to have an idea, you just have to have a seemingly clever refutation."
"And you argue like a nine-year-old," said Peter. "Sticking your fingers in your ears and going 'La la la' and 'same to you.'"
Petra looked like she wanted to slap him. Instead she put her fingers in her ears and said, "Same to you" and "La la la."
He did not laugh. Instead he reached out a hand, intending to pull her arm away from her ear. But she whirled around and kicked his hand so hard that he thought she might have broken his wrist. As it was, he staggered and stumbled over the corner of the bed in his hotel room and ended up on his butt on the floor.
"There's the Hegemon of Earth," said Petra.
"Where's your camera? Don't you want this to be public?"
"If I wanted to destroy you, you'd be destroyed."
"Petra, I didn't send Bean into that compound. Bean sent himself."
"You let him go."
"Yes I did, and in any event I was proven right."
"But you didn't know he'd live. I was carrying his baby and you sent him in to die."
"Nobody sends Bean anywhere," said Peter, "and you know it."
She whirled away from him and stalked out of the room. She would have slammed the door, but the pneumatics prevented it.
He had seen, though. The tears in her eyes.
She didn't hate Peter. She wanted to hate him. But what she really was furious about was that her husband was dying and she had agreed to this mission because she knew it would be important. If it worked, it would be important. But it wasn't working. It probably wouldn't work.
Peter knew that. But he also knew that he had to talk to Caliph Alai, and he had to do it now if the conversation was to have any good effect. If possible, he'd like to have the conversation without risking the prestige of the office of Hegemon. But the longer they delayed, the greater the likelihood of word of his trip to Damascus getting out. And then if Alai rebuffed him, the humiliation would be public, and the office of Hegemon would be greatly diminished.
So Petra's judgment of him was obviously unfair. If all he cared about was his own authority, he wouldn't be here.
And she was clever enough to know that. She got into Battle School, didn't she? She was the only girl among Ender's Jeesh. That certified her as his superior--at least in the area of strategy and leadership. Surely she must see that he was putting the goal of preventing a bloody war above his own career.
As soon as he thought of this, he heard her voice inside his head, saying, "Oh, isn't that fine and noble of you, to put the lives of hundreds of thousands of soldiers ahead of your own indelible place in history. Do you think you get a prize for that?" Or else she'd say, "The only reason I'm along is specifically so you can avoid risking anything." Or else, "You've always been bold as a risk-taker--when the stakes are high enough and your own life isn't on the line."
This is great, Peter, he thought. You don't even need her in the room with you and you can still carry on an argument with her.
How did Bean stand her? No doubt she didn't treat him like this.
No. It was impossible to imagine that being nasty was something she could switch on and off. Bean had to have seen this side of her. And yet he stayed with her.
And loved her. Peter wondered what it would be like, to have Petra look at him the way she looked at Bean.
Then he corrected himself at once. Wonderful to have a woman look at him the way Petra looked at Bean. The last thing he wanted was a lovelorn Petra making googly eyes at him.
The telephone rang.
The voice made sure it was "Peter Jones" and then said, "Five in the morning, be downstairs outside the north lobby doors." Click.
Well, what brought that on? Something in Petra's and his argument? Peter had swept the room for bugs, but that didn't mean they couldn't have some low-tech device like somebody in the next room with his ear pressed against the wall.
What did we say to make them let me see the Caliph?
Maybe it was what he said about avoiding another bloody war.
Or perhaps it was because they heard him admit to Petra that maybe he didn't have any legitimate authority.
What if they recorded that? What if it suddenly surfaced on the web?
Then it would happen, and he'd do his best to recover from the blow, and either he'd succeed or he'd fail. No point fretting about it now. Somebody was meeting him at the north door of the lobby tomorrow morning before daylight. Maybe they'd lead him to Alai, and maybe he'd achieve what he needed to achieve, save all that he needed to save.
He toyed with the idea of not telling Petra about the meeting. After all, she had no pertinent office at all. She had no particular right to be at the meeting, especially after their quarrel tonight.
Don't be spiteful and petty, Peter told himself. One spiteful act brings too much pleasure--it just makes you want to do another, and another. And sooner each time.
So he picked up the phone and on the seventh ring she picked it up.
"I'm not going to apologize," she said curtly.
"Good," he said. "Because I don't want some smarmy I'm-sorry-you-got-so-upset fake apology. What I want is for you to join me at five A.M. at the north door of the lobby."
"What for?"
"I don't know," said Peter. "I'm just passing along what I was just told on the telephone."
"He's going to let us see him?"
"Or he's sending thugs to escort us back to the airport. How can I possibly know? You're the one who's his friend. You tell me what he's planning."
"I haven't the slightest idea," said Petra. "It's not like Alai and I were ever close. And are you sure they want me to come to the actual meeting? There are plenty of Muslims who would be horrified at the thought of an unveiled married woman speaking face to face with a man--even the Caliph."
"I don't know what they want," said Peter. "I want you at the meeting."
They were ushered into a closed van and driven along a route that Peter assumed was convoluted and deceptively long. For all he knew, the Caliph's headquarters was next door to their hotel. But Alai's people knew that without the Caliph there was no unity, and without unity Islam had no strength, so they were taking no chances on letting outsiders know where the Caliph lived.
They were driven far enough that they might be outside Damascus. When they emerged from the van, it was not in daylight, it was indoors...or underground. Even the porticoed garden into which they were ushered was artificially lighted, and the sound of running and trickling and falling water masked any faint noises that might have seeped in from outside and hinted where they were.
Alai did not so much greet them as notice their presence as he walked in the garden. He did not even face them, but sat a few meters away, facing a fountain, and began to speak.
"I have no desire to humiliate you, Peter Wiggin," he said. "You should not have come."
"I appreciate your letting me speak with you at all," Peter answered.
"Wisdom said that I should announce to the world that the Hegemon had come to see the Caliph, and the Caliph refused to see him. But I told Wisdom to be patient, and let Folly be my guide today in this garden."
"Petra and I are here to--"
"Petra is here," said Alai, "because you thought her presence might get you in to see me, and you needed a witness that I would be reluctant to kill, and because you want her to be your ally after her husband is dead."
Peter did not let himself glance at Petra to see how she took this sally from Alai. She knew the man; Peter did not. She would interpret his words as she saw fit, and nothing he could see in her face right now would help him understand anything. It would only weaken him to show he cared.
"I'm here to offer my help," said Peter.
"I command armies that rule over more than half the population of the world," said Alai. "I have united Muslim nations from Morocco to Indonesia, and liberated the oppressed people
s in between."
"It's the difference between 'conquered' and 'liberated' that I wanted to talk about."
"So you came to rebuke me, not to help after all," said Alai.
"I see I'm wasting my time," said Peter. "If we can't speak together without petty debate, then you are past receiving help."
"Help?" said Alai. "One of my advisers said to me, when I told them I wanted to see you, 'How many soldiers does this Hegemon have?'"
"How many divisions has the Pope?" quoted Peter.
"More than the Hegemon has," said Alai, "if the Pope should ask for them. As the old dead United Nations found out long ago, religion always has more warriors than some vague international abstraction."
Peter realized then that Alai was not speaking to him. He was speaking past him. This was not a private conversation after all.
"I do not intend to be disrespectful to the Caliph," said Peter. "I have seen the majesty of your achievement and the generosity of spirit with which you have dealt with your enemies."
Alai visibly relaxed. They were now playing the same game. Peter had finally understood the rules. "What is to be gained from humiliating those who believe they stand outside the power of God?" asked Alai. "God will show them his power in his own good time, and until then we are wise to be kind."
Alai was speaking as the true believers around him required him to speak--always asserting the primacy of the Caliphate over all non-Muslim powers.
"The dangers I came to speak of," said Peter, "will not ever come from me or because of the small influence I have in the world. Though I was not chosen by God, and there are few who listen to me, I also seek, as you seek, the peace and happiness of the children of God on Earth."
Now was the time, if Alai was completely the captive of his supporters, for him to rant about how it was blasphemous for an infidel like Peter to invoke the name of God or pretend that there could be peace before all the world was under the rule of the Caliphate.
Instead Alai said, "I listen to all men, but obey only God."
"There was a day when Islam was hated and feared throughout the world," said Peter. "That era ended long ago, before either of us were born, but your enemies are reviving those old stories."
"Those old lies, you mean," said Alai.
"The fact that no man can make the Hajj in his own skin and live," said Peter, "suggests that not all the stories are lies. In the name of Islam terrible weapons were acquired and in the name of Islam they were used to destroy the most sacred place on Earth."