Though probably not.
It was him she should be kissing. He had been so close. She had been considering it. It would have taken a few more months maybe, but she would have been his. They would have worked on creating prophecy babies. Practising till they had it perfect.
He watched as they finally broke apart for air. Flic and Jamieson stood by them, grinning. Not that the two of them noticed. They were oblivious to anything but each other.
And Lucas was stroking her cheek, tipping up her chin. And Cyrus had to look away. He had never experienced loss before. Never, he realised. Because this hollowing out, this rage and this sadness were completely new to him. Even with his amnesia, he knew he would have recognised this feeling. He guessed that’s what love did to you. And it sucked. Love sucked balls.
‘What are you going to do?’ Issa asked.
‘Aren’t you supposed to be the one telling me that?’ he snapped.
Issa fell silent at his side.
He took a deep breath. What was he going to do now? He didn’t know. How was he supposed to let her go? Forget about her? Maybe he should jump through the gateway again and take a second round of amnesia.
He glanced to his left where Vero and Ash were locked in a tight embrace. Her arm was bandaged up with a scrap of cloth. He guessed that those two were done with all this. Vero wanted out. She deserved out. Behind them Flic had her tongue shoved half way down that Shifter’s throat. For god’s sake, what was this, junior prom?
He stared up at the white-porticoed mansion fifty or so metres behind him. Then he frowned, looking down at the sword in his hand. What was he going to do?
He turned to Issa. ‘I guess I’m going to do the only thing I know how to do,’ he said. ‘Fight these things. There’s a whole city to clean up.’
‘Well, if it makes you feel any better,’ Issa said with a sly smile, ‘I can see you living in luxury while you do it.’ She nodded her head at the house behind them.
He narrowed his eyes at her suspiciously. ‘This place?’
‘Mmm,’ Issa said, grinning now. ‘The owners are somewhat dead.’
He shrugged at her, turning and considering the house, checking with her that she wasn’t pulling some kind of Sybll idea of a joke. She could really see that?
‘Well, someone does need to guard the gateway until the White Light decides to be born,’ he said, admiring the three floors of windows and the turquoise glint of a pool through the trees.
‘To be born?’ Issa asked, her voice hitching in surprise.
Cyrus gave her a wry smile. ‘You really need to get your vision tested, Issa. Maybe you need glasses or something.’
She frowned at him, her clear blue eyes widening to the size of dinner plates. Then her head whipped around and she stared at Evie and Lucas, her eyes turning the colour of slushy snow. When they cleared, after just a few seconds, he could see she had seen it. Her mouth was gaping open almost as wide as her eyes. The Sybll hadn’t seen that one coming. Surprise, surprise.
So his mother had been right, then. He couldn’t wait to tell her. He could just imagine how relieved she’d be when he told her she wasn’t going to be a grandma.
‘You’re going to need help.’
He looked over his shoulder. Selena was standing there, bandana freshly tied, smears of dirt smudging her cheek, eyes ablaze, looking a little like Rambo, only less ladylike.
Cyrus rolled his eyes. This day was just getting better and better. ‘No way,’ he answered flatly.
‘Yes way, pendejo,’ Selena answered, flashing a grin at him and revealing several gold-capped teeth in the process.
With a grimace, Cyrus recognised the rush she was having – the newbie, brain-blowing high of having dealt some serious punishment to some serious unhuman ass.
‘Did you see what I did to Victor?’ Selena asked, her voice brightening. ‘I popped his ass. You want me to do the same to you?’
Cyrus ran through several answers in his head.
‘Nah,’ she cut in before he could select the best one. ‘I think you’re best off with me on your side.’ She laughed. ‘If you like, I’ll let you take a turn on the flamethrower once in a while.’
He sighed inwardly.
‘I call dibs on the master bedroom,’ she said, sashaying across the lawn towards the house.
‘Hey,’ he called to her back. ‘Just so you know, I’m the boss.’
‘Yeah, you keep telling yourself that,’ she shouted back.
Chapter 60
Evie rolled over in the bed, letting her hand trail over Lucas’s chest. She traced the edges of the knife scar cutting across his stomach, before placing her palm over his heart. She couldn’t tear her eyes off his face, or stop her hands from tracing every inch of him.
He was the same with her, his gaze hungry, his hands more so, yet so full of tenderness at the same time that she ached to lie with him all night and through into the next day and the next. She didn’t ever want to sleep again just in case he disappeared. She couldn’t quite believe he was still there, despite all the evidence to the contrary.
‘I love you,’ she murmured, her lips pressed to his scar.
‘I love you too.’
His hands traced the livid purple bruise on her rib cage where Victor had kicked her. A small frown line creased between his eyes.
She cleared her throat. She’d been waiting for the right time. The memory of Cyrus – of both the kiss she’d shared with him and the expression on his face when he’d seen her with Lucas a few hours ago – had been nudging at her. The guilt she was feeling for him – about him – was sliding like a knife under the surface of her happiness, threatening to puncture it. Cyrus she would need to confront eventually face to face, but Lucas she had to deal with right now. She had to come clean.
She took a deep breath. ‘Lucas,’ she said, ‘I need to tell you something.’
He paused, his hand on her stomach. ‘No. It’s OK,’ he said softly, shaking his head. ‘You don’t need to tell me. I know.’ And then, after a beat, ‘I understand.’
She tensed. He knew? He’d seen? Of course he had, that’s why he’d been so cold with her at first, so distant.
‘I missed you so much,’ she began, her voice faltering as the excuses started tumbling desperately from her lips. ‘I thought that I would never be the same again. I lost a part of myself the day you died. Or the day I thought you’d died.’
‘You have me back,’ he said, taking her face in his hands, holding her there until she raised her eyes to meet his. ‘I’m yours now for ever,’ he said. ‘I’m not going anywhere.’
‘Unless my mum kills you,’ Evie said, swiping at a tear. ‘She thinks you abandoned me in New Mexico. And now she thinks I’m a drug addict. A pregnant one. And that you’re to blame.’
‘Well, maybe one day I’ll be to blame for the last part.’
Evie felt her cheeks blazing red.
‘Don’t worry,’ Lucas said, smoothing a strand of hair out of her eyes. ‘Enough people have tried to kill me. And I’m still here. I’ll take my chances with your mum. I’m not leaving your side ever again.’
She kissed him and then, laughing, fell back against the pillow.
He leant up on one elbow to look at her. ‘What? What is it?’ he asked.
‘Just that you were right.’
‘About what?’
‘You said once that life takes us down a path, that it leads us places that sometimes we don’t want to go.’
He smiled, his fingers stroking along her cheekbone. ‘But it always, always brings us to exactly the point where we’re supposed to be,’ he murmured, leaning down and kissing her.
Acknowledgements
Thank you:
As always to John, my love, words can’t express my gratitude for your continual reassurance along this trajectory we’re on.
To Alula, who’s still too young to read any of my books but whose imagination. creativity and songs inspire me daily. I love you a billion and a
hundred. And you can’t plus one.
My friends Vic and Nichola who are my daily inspiration.
Laurie, because I want to be your screensaver again.
All the lovely bloggers and reviewers who take the time to read and review my books. I am honoured and grateful.
Jill Alger for the edit.
Leila, for the laughter and the many wonderful expressions I’ve borrowed, including the sucking balls one.
Hannah, for your helpful editing advice early on.
Jamieson, Vero and Lobo the dog, for allowing me to use your names (I did ask, right?). I hope you like your namesakes and that they do you proud.
Asa and Kiana, for the playdate provision which proved a lifeline. Thank you so much.
Liesel, for the final proofing (and for loving Lucas!)
More about the author
Having spent most of her life in London, Sarah quit her job in the non profit sector in 2009 and took off on a round the world trip with her husband and princess-obsessed daughter on a mission to find a new place to call home.
After several months in India, Singapore, Australia and the US, they settled in Bali where Sarah now spends her days writing by the pool and trying to machete open coconuts without severing a limb.
She finished her first novel Hunting Lila just before they left the UK, wrote the sequel, Losing Lila, on the beach in India, and had signed a two book deal with Simon & Schuster by the time they reached Bali.
Fated, which was written during their stay in California, was published in January 2012. Her next young adult book, The Sound, is out in August 2013.
Sarah also writes adult romance under the pen name Lola Salt.
Sarah Alderson, Shadowed (Fated)
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