She cleared her throat. “I—I know things are confusing for you, Slade.” Two years of hell and pain. “But Gunner loves you. He would never have left you if he’d known—”
“He. Wanted. You.”
Slade’s blazing stare seemed to scorch her skin with his rage.
Sydney shook her head.
“I was in his way,” Slade said. His eyes were bloodshot. Wild. “So he saw a way to take me out.”
“This is crazy! We were in Peru back then to save you. Your plane went down. We came in to get you out! Why come in at all if we just wanted to leave you to die?” Surely he’d realize that his words didn’t make sense. He’d start to understand, to see reason.
But his hands were fisting again. “You wanted to save me. He followed you here, because he couldn’t stop you then. He was waiting for his moment, just waiting...willing to do anything to get you.”
Gunner had asked her not to tell Slade about them. But Slade was acting as if—
“He got you, didn’t he? I can see it in his eyes.”
Her cheeks burned.
“Enough.” Gunner’s snarl.
“Not even close,” Slade fired right back. “They tortured me, for two years. And during all those months, just how many times did you make love with my—”
Gunner lunged forward. This time, he was the one who had to be pulled back. Logan grabbed him and held on tight.
“Let him come at me! Let him take me on...instead of running away with my girl!”
“Stop.” The quiet word broke from Sydney. Her head was throbbing. For all of the times that she’d imagined Slade’s rescue, she’d never imagined this scenario. “Just...stop.” Then she was marching toward Slade. “He had to drag me out of the jungle. I almost died, too. He was shot, so many times, we were both barely moving.” Why couldn’t he understand what had happened?
Slade glared down at her. “You moved well enough to survive.”
Her chin lifted. “Search parties were sent after you. Again and again. We kept looking.”
“Not hard enough.”
The rage in him seemed to burn past any control.
“Get him out of here,” Logan ordered, giving a jerk of his head toward Cale. “Put him in the second villa, guard him and make sure he cools down.”
Cale put a hand on Slade’s shoulder.
Slade immediately jerked away from him. “Don’t believe me?” His voice rose. “None of you believe me? You think you can trust him? That I’m crazy?” He laughed again. The sound was rough and wild. “Then just...ask him.”
She glanced at Gunner. Logan had released him, and now Gunner stood as still as a statue. The white bandage was a stark contrast to his tanned skin.
“Ask him, Sydney. You do it,” Slade urged. “Because it’s all about you, right?”
“No, it isn’t.” The throbbing in her head was getting worse.
But Slade kept talking. This wasn’t the man she remembered. So much rage. “Ask him!” Slade yelled. “Ask him if he wanted you, even then.”
She stared at Gunner. His eyelashes lifted and his gaze held hers.
She couldn’t bring herself to ask the question.
“Take him out,” Logan ordered again.
“I saw the way you looked at her then. The way you look at her now! I was in the way!”
Cale pulled Slade toward the door.
Slade kept shouting. “You saw your chance, and you took it. You played hero to her, but you left me to die! You got just what you wanted—her!”
Sydney flinched.
“Tell her!” Slade was fighting against Cale’s hold. “Tell her the truth. She deserves it! We both do! Look at her. Look at Sydney and tell her how you felt about her...tell her about all the times you’d watch her when you didn’t think anyone saw.” His voice dropped. “But I saw. I always saw.”
His voice was ugly and mean and he was so far from the Slade that she’d remembered. Captivity could twist a man—or a woman—she knew that. It would take months, maybe even years of therapy before the Slade she knew returned.
If he ever did.
“I knew you wanted her, but she wanted me! She wasn’t going to you, not while I was there. So you got me out of the way.” Slade’s chest heaved.
She stared at him, seeing past the long hair and beard. His nose had been broken. She could see the rough bump along its bridge. There was a long, thin scar under his right eye. Another scar bisecting his left eyebrow. And that limp...
“Tell her!”
But Gunner wasn’t talking.
Cale had Slade near the entrance to the villa now, but all of a sudden, Slade stopped struggling. His cheeks were flushed dark red, his eyes glittered, but his body just froze.
Then he looked at Sydney. “Shouldn’t he be defending himself?” Now his voice was flat. From screaming to flat.
Sydney shivered.
“Shouldn’t he be trying to tell you that I’ve got it all wrong?” His voice seemed hoarse. “Why isn’t he talking?”
Why wasn’t she? Sydney cleared her throat. “You’re confused, Slade.” She tried to make her voice sound soothing. But her words broke because her control was fracturing.
“Did he wait a few months...or did he go after you right away?”
The question had her gasping. “It wasn’t like that!” Gunner hadn’t gone after her at all. Not for two years. Not until...
The last mission.
When she’d told him that she’d moved on.
They’d been moving on, together.
“You’re wrong about him,” Sydney finished, voice quiet. “You’ll see that, soon.”
Gunner still hadn’t spoken.
“No,” Slade exhaled on a low breath. “You’re the one who’s wrong, and you’ll see that...soon.”
Then he was leaving the villa. Cale followed on his heels.
The door shut behind them with the softest of clicks.
Silence.
Sydney was still staring at that shut door. Her body was tight and aching, as if she’d just been through another vicious battle. Maybe she had.
“Gunner...” Logan’s voice. “Gunner, you know it’s the stress. Slade is going to have PTSD, he’s going to—”
Gunner shook his head. “He meant what he said.”
“Yeah, well, if he meant it, he was wrong.” Logan was adamant. “I know you, and that...hell...that’s not the way you operate. You don’t leave a man behind, especially not your brother.”
She couldn’t read Gunner’s expression.
“But I did leave him behind,” Gunner said softly. “Isn’t that why we’re all here now?”
She wanted to grab him and shake him. “You tried everything you could!” If it hadn’t been for Gunner, she would have died on that mission. He’d barely managed to get them both to safety.
“Rescue teams went back. They saw no sign of him.” Logan’s sigh was ragged. “Stop beating the hell out of yourself over this.”
“You already let Slade beat the hell out of you.” Sydney didn’t even know why she said those words, but...
Gunner glanced at her. The darkness of his eyes was a banked heat. “Why didn’t you ask me?” Soft.
Logan whistled. “Okay, I’m going to check in with Mercer. Syd, you, uh, finish up in here, and then we’ll talk about our exit strategy.”
Then he was gone. Pretty much rushing in his haste to get away.
Gunner rolled his shoulders, as if pushing away a painful memory. Then he stalked toward her.
She didn’t move, even though she had the urge to flee.
“He told you to ask me,” Gunner said. “So why didn’t you?”
Because she hadn’t wanted the others to hear his answer. Because some things should be between the two of them.
“You thought he was right, didn’t you?”
“Not about you leaving him,” she whispered. Logan was on the phone in the outer room, but still close enough that she worried he’d overhear them.
A muscle flexed in Gunner’s hard jaw. “You thought I wanted you.”
This was the hard part. The part that would tear her pride to shreds, but what did pride matter now? “No, but I knew I wanted you.” That was her secret shame. She’d been with Slade; she’d met him first...
Then she’d met Gunner.
And in the beginning, Gunner had made her nervous. He’d put her on edge, every time that she was near him.
Slade had been the one to offer quick compliments. To take her out on fun dates.
She hadn’t exactly had a whole lot of fun in her life up to that point.
Her parents had always been so strict, her dad an ex-colonel who ran a tight ship.
Then her mother had died. A sudden heart attack when Sydney was just fourteen. Her dad and his tight ship...they became lost after that. Broken. She’d had to be the caretaker, growing up too fast.
Until her father had slipped into a bottle and not come out again.
She’d been eighteen when he crashed his car.
She’d joined the air force just two weeks later.
Slade had been the Ortez brother she met first. The one with the ready smile, the big dreams.
But it had been Gunner whom she was always so intently aware of. Gunner who put her on edge with his heated stare.
She’d agreed to marry Slade, though, because she did love him, and he’d said that he loved her.
While Gunner...back then, he’d barely seemed to tolerate her at all.
Gunner wasn’t saying a word now. Just staring at her. And she’d already said enough for them, hadn’t she? “Get some rest,” she told him, and turned away. She was supposed to stay in another villa, the one on the far end. Only she wouldn’t be going there first.
She needed to talk to Slade. Alone.
She headed for the door. Logan had his back turned to her as he talked into his phone, but she had no doubt that he’d heard every word she said to Gunner.
“You don’t have to lie.” Gunner’s flat words. Stopping her.
Insulting her. “Is that what you think I’m doing?” Her fingers curled around the doorknob. “Then maybe you don’t know me half as well as I thought.”
And she left him.
* * *
“CALE, DO YOU mind if I speak to Slade alone?”
Cale stood in the doorway of the second villa, his broad shoulders stretching to take up the space. He stared down at her with hooded eyes. “You sure that’s what you want to do? He’s pretty messed up right now, Sydney.”
“I need to talk to him.” To find out what had happened to him. Where he’d been all that time.
Cale gave a slow nod. “Okay, but if you need me, I’ll be right outside.”
Her eyebrows climbed. She was EOD; she could take care of herself.
But Cale’s lips curved in the ghost of a grin. “You just look so delicate...”
A lie. But she used that delicate trap to fool many of her enemies.
“Sydney?” Slade’s voice sounded subdued. Good. Maybe he was calming down.
“Right outside,” Cale murmured as he slipped past her and gave her the privacy that she needed.
Slade came toward her, his steps uncertain. Only fair, considering how uncertain she felt right now.
“I thought about you,” Slade said as his gaze slid over her face, “so much.” Then those slow steps of his were coming toward her. He wrapped his arms around her, pulled her tight against his chest.
Why did being in his arms feel wrong? Sydney forced her own arms to lift. To hug him back. “I’m glad you’re alive.” That was the truth.
He tensed. “At least one person is.”
She eased back so that she could stare up at his face. “Gunner is glad, too. He’s your brother—”
“Half brother.”
A distinction that Slade had pointed out before, but Gunner...he never had.
“He didn’t know that you were out there,” Sydney whispered to him. “Search parties went back to recover you—” She’d almost said your body. “But no one found any sign of you.” She shook her head. “Where were you, Slade?”
“I don’t know.” Gruff. Lost. “The first few months were a blur.” He stalked away from her, began to pace the living area. “Different camps. Shacks. They dragged me through the jungle so many times.”
“And they never tried to ransom you?” Why not? It didn’t make sense to her. If you’ve got a valuable hostage, you use that hostage.
“I wasn’t the only prisoner they had. Some were ransomed.” He stopped his pacing. “Some were killed.”
She rocked forward onto the balls of her feet. “Are there others still being held?” If there were, they needed to get another rescue team ready.
“No. I was the last.” He swung to face her. His chin shot up. “Look, I don’t know why they didn’t kill me, too. I don’t know why they dragged me around. Sometimes I wished that they would kill me.”
“Slade—”
“Sometimes I just wanted it all to end.” His throat moved as he swallowed. “They would...they would ask me questions some days about my life—about you.”
Her heart was pounding faster. When she and Gunner had been held, their captor had asked them about the EOD. “Did you tell them about Elite Ops?” Slade hadn’t been in the group, but he’d once gotten clearance to work as a liaison on a mission with the group.
“Yes.” Hushed.
That was how the leader had known about their division.
“I told them. I would have told them anything for food and water.”
The mercenary who had come after EOD agents a little while back...that mercenary had been hired by someone in South America. Someone who had learned about the EOD from Slade?
No wonder his captors left him alive. They knew they could use him in order to get us.
“I want him investigated, Sydney.”
There was a sharp edge in his words now. He’d seemed almost...calm...a moment before, but now Slade was marching back toward her, his limp barely noticeable. “Did you hear me?” Slade demanded. “I want Gunner investigated. He left me to die. He’s not getting away with what he did to me.”
She had to make Slade see reason. “We both thought you were dead. Slade, we had your funeral.” It had nearly ripped her apart to stand there with the scent of flowers choking her.
But Slade laughed. “I’m sure that was exactly what he wanted.”
No, it hadn’t been. Gunner’s eyes had been haunted at the grave site.
“I’ll tear the whole EOD down if I have to do it, but Gunner won’t get away with what he’s done.” Then he was standing right in front of her, glaring down at Sydney. “I’ll make him pay, I swear I will.”
His eyes looked...wild. And his hands were shaking.
“Slade, are you all right?”
“You were with him, weren’t you?” Angry, low, biting.
Sydney squared her shoulders. “You’ve been through—” Hell. “I don’t want you getting so worked up, okay?”
“Worked up?” he yelled.
She winced.
“You have no idea just how ‘worked up’ I can get.” His smile was mean. Not the flirtatious grin that she remembered. “But you’re all about to find out.”
The door opened behind her. She figured it was Cale, coming back inside to check on her because he’d heard Slade’s raised voice.
Slade’s eyelids flickered. “Sydney, do you still love me?”
The man’s moods were shifting constantly. Too fast. A break because of his captivity? Or something more? His eyes were bloodshot, lined with deep shadows.
“Sydney?”
“Of course,” she said, and it was true. “You have to know that a part of me will—”
The door closed again.
Not Cale.
She spun around, yanked open the door and saw Cale standing to the side and Gunner stalking toward the beach.
“Now he knows,” Slade said, sounding satisfied, ??
?and now it’s time for his world to be ripped apart.”
* * *
SLADE STARED OUT at the pounding surf. He couldn’t remember the last time that he’d seen the ocean. The scent of the salt water was strong, and a million stars glittered down on him.
He’d shaved his beard and used a knife to cut his hair. He still didn’t feel quite human, but then, he hadn’t felt so for a very long time.
Sydney was gone. She’d headed back to her villa.
But not back to Gunner.
He wouldn’t let her go to Gunner. His brother actually thought that he hadn’t realized how Gunner felt about her. Slade had known. He’d always known.
I had something you wanted. He’d enjoyed keeping Sydney on his arm, showing Gunner what he’d never have.
His big brother, the one who was supposed to be so strong and tough and perfect.
Sydney would now see that Gunner wasn’t perfect.
They’d all see.
Slade was a survivor. He was the strong one. And Gunner...
He was the one who’d be destroyed.
Chapter Five
She couldn’t sleep. Sydney threw off the sheet that she’d yanked over her body, and climbed from the bed. She was wearing a pair of old jogging shorts and a T-shirt.
Sydney ran a hand through her hair. She’d been in that bed, tossing and turning, for hours. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw Gunner.
And Slade.
“It’s time for his world to be ripped apart.”
No, no, it wasn’t time for that. Sydney hurried toward the sliding door and left her villa. She wasn’t going to be able to sleep until she talked to Gunner. Things were going to be rough for them all, but they would get through this.
He’d heard her say that she loved Slade. She did love him, but her feelings weren’t the same as they’d been two years ago. She wasn’t just going to abandon Slade, but she also wasn’t planning on losing Gunner.
He meant too much to her.
Her footsteps were quiet on the sand. Any sounds that she made were instantly swallowed by the pounding surf. Cale and Slade were in the second villa, Logan and Gunner in the third.
She walked past that second villa.
The moonlight shone down on her. There were no clouds tonight. No dense jungle. Just beauty, stretching all around her and—