Chapter 10
Broken Hearts
One morning as Jim prepared to leave for work, he met Bessie as she came in to help get the children off to school. Dear Bessie! So lovely in character, as well as physical features. Such a consistent Christian! And his children loved her. "Watch it, Jim," he mentally cautioned his runaway thoughts.
"Good-morning, Jim," she smiled sweetly. "Am I early or are you late?"
"Neither, Bessie. I guess we're just both on time today."
He couldn't help a lingering look. Her blue eyes seemed to sparkle as never before, and her blond hair shone as the early rays of the morning sun danced upon it.
"Have a good day, Bessie," he said as he left the house.
"Bessie is too young for you," one side of his mind argued. "But look at Sarah and Ben," another thought countered. "Ben is ten years older than Sarah and they're very happy together. And Bessie is Sarah's sister--"
All day and the days that followed, these thoughts crowded into Jim's mind. He made it a point to stick around in the mornings until she came. Did he imagine that she blushed when he smiled at her? And those little nervous gestures of hers, was it because she felt the same way he did? He could only hope and pray and bid his time until he could get a chance to talk to her.
The time came unexpectedly one afternoon when his boss let him off early to attend some business. He had no idea that Bessie would be at the house; the children usually took over when they came home from school. So he was pleasantly surprised when he opened the kitchen door and saw her busy peeling potatoes.
"Why, Jim," she said in astonishment, "What brings you home so early? The girls were delayed at school today because their teacher wanted to help them catch up in their arithmetic and reading."
"I have some business to attend to, Bessie, so I laid off early today."
There was an awkward silence between them as their eyes met. Bessie dropped her eyes and blushed as Jim took a step toward her.
"Maybe God worked this out, Bessie," Jim suggested. "I've been wanting to talk to you. You see, I--uh--I think-uh--" he was stammering like a school boy.
"What are you trying to tell me, Jim?" she smiled reassuringly.
Taking her smile as a sign of encouragement, he blurted out, "I--uh--I think a great deal of you, Bessie. You fit right in with my family, and my children love you very much. You're like a mother to them. I wonder if-perhaps--you feel--". One look at her face, and he was unable to finish.
Blushing a crimson red, Bessie answered, "Jim, I think you're wonderful, and I do love your children very dearly. But Jim," her eyes seemed to plead for understanding as they met his earnest gaze. "I don't care for you--uh--I mean not the way you're asking me to. I'm truly sorry, Jim. You're a very special person, but I just don't love you. Maybe some day I will if it's God's will. Let's pray about it."
Hanging his head, Jim said, "Sure, Bessie, I will wait. May God's will be done."
Since neither of them could seem to think of anything more to say, Bessie set the potatoes aside and picked up her purse to go. "The children will be here soon. They can finish getting the supper. I must run now, Jim. See you later." She hurriedly left.
Just as she went out the door, Alton drove up.
"Hello, Bessie. Going some place?" he called.
"Yes, I've just started home. How are you this afternoon, Alton?" A smile lit up her face as she greeted him.
Jim watched as Alton offered her a ride. "Come on, Bessie. Let me drive you home."
"Thanks, but I can walk. It's not very far and I enjoy walking."
"Then I'll walk with you," he informed her, falling into step beside her.
She glanced back at Jim uneasily. It was evident that she was embarrassed, but she did not protest further.
"So that's it. I understand now," Jim voiced his thoughts aloud, and with drooping shoulders he walked back into the house.
"Do you think Bessie likes Alton?" Mary asked him a week or so later. "He walks her home often."
"It appears that way, Mary." Jim sighed as he patted her little head. "May God's will be done," he said under his breath.
A change came over Bessie as she began to see Alton more and more. She did not talk on spiritual matters as much as before, and her singing was not what it once was. Mary approached her one day and asked, "Bessie, do you still love Jesus?"
"Why of course, child," she assured her. "Why do you ask?"
"You hardly ever talk about Him anymore, and you don't pray with me or read me Bible stories. I miss it." Tearfully, she looked up earnestly into Bessie's face. "Can we pray now?"
Falling on her knees quickly to hide her embarrassment, Bessie started to pray softly, but Mary lead out.
"Dear Jesus," she prayed simply, "help Bessie to love You as she once did. Looks like Alton has taken Your place, Jesus, 'cause she loves him the best. But help her to love You the most. Amen."
Bessie arose from her knees and gave Mary a hug and thanked her for her concern. Her simple prayer had served its purpose in bringing conviction to her heart.
"You are a precious and unusual child, Mary. Not many children of your age are so spiritually minded. God has used you to show me what I must do."
"What did He show you, Bessie?" Mary wanted to know.
"Perhaps you won't understand, Mary, but Alton is not a Christian, and God has been dealing with my heart about seeing him so much. You see, God tells us in His word that Christians are not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers. I am very, very fond of Alton, Mary, but by God's grace I intend to stop seeing him." With tears glistening in her eyes, she added, "I love Jesus the most Mary, and I want to please Him."
"You mean you never intend to see Alton again?" Tears swelled in her eyes.
"Oh, I'm sure we'll see each other, Dear, but there will be no more dates."
Alton came as usual that afternoon and he and Bessie walked off together. Once out of hearing distance of the Reid household, Bessie spoke, "Alton, I have something to tell you."
"Before you do, Bessie, let me tell you something. I have been trying to pick up the courage for several days now." He hesitated and then spoke his mind. "I love you. Bessie, my dear, and I sense that you feel the same toward me. Am I right?" He stopped walking and smiled down at her.
Bessie swallowed a lump in her throat and then answered, "Yes, Alton, I do love you, but--".
"Then Bessie, I am going to be real bold and ask you something before I lose my courage. Will you marry me? I have been hesitant about asking you, knowing you are so-so religious, but I will take you to church regularly, and I promise I will never hinder you in any way concerning your religion."
Bessie put her fingers to his mouth trying to silence him, but he continued, "I have never cared for a girl in my life until I met you, but you are everything I could ever desire. How about it, my dear, dear Bessie, will you make me the happiest man in the world by becoming my wife? We can be very happy together."
Bessie was trembling as she looked up, revealing in that look her love for him. And looking into his eyes so full of love and admiration, she wondered if God really expected her to give up someone she loved so dearly? One who needed her so badly? One who was getting past the usual age to marry and had never been in love before? Had she only had an emotional reaction when Mary prayed for her? Had the Spirit actually been prompting her to make a clean break? Could she go ahead and marry him and win him to Christ afterwards? After all, he was attending church. But what did God's word teach? She had known the Holy Scriptures from childhood so there was no mistaking the truth of God's Word. Could she turn her back on God's Word after God had been so good to her?
Alton was patiently awaiting the answer he felt sure he would get. She dropped her eyes and then her head as she told him, "Alton, I can't marry you."
"But why, Bessie?" he asked in alarm as the smile faded from his face. "You acknowledged that you love me. Then why can't you marry me? I don't unde
rstand."
"The Bible says, 'Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers.' I'm a Christian, Alton, and you're not. I would be out of God's will to marry you. I must choose God's way and abide by His Word regardless of the cost."
"But Bessie, I wouldn't interfere with your religion. You could live your life and allow me the privilege of living mine."
"It won't work, Alton. 'A house divided against itself cannot stand.' "
"Then you're turning me down, Bessie? Why did you lead me on, if you feel this way?"
"I was wrong to lead you on, Alton, and I ask your forgiveness. It was just that I loved you so dearly and thought something had to work out for us. I kept hoping and praying you'd give your heart to God. But this afternoon, God showed me plainly that I had to break off our relationship. Remember, Alton, I tried to tell you before you proposed to me, and you stopped me. I'm terribly sorry to hurt you, but I can't marry you or keep company with you any longer." The tears coursed down her cheeks as she bared her heart to him. The pained expression on his countenance caused her to bite her lip and start for home.
They walked a few blocks in silence. As Uncle Jack's house came in view, Alton spoke again, "Guess it's better this way, Bessie. If you care more for your religion than for me, we could never make it anyway. Good-bye, Bessie. Maybe you will meet the right guy some day--a preacher, perhaps." He spat out the last words sarcastically.
"Oh Alton, please try to understand. If you were only a Christian, things would be different."
"Well, I'm not and probably never will be. You see, I happen to be satisfied the way I am."
He stopped and took her hand in his. "Good-bye Bessie, and good-luck." His voice trembled noticeably and his face was drained of color as he fought to control his emotions.
Looking up into his eyes, she said, "Believe me, Alton, this is hard. I will pray for you every day."
"Save your breath, Bessie, for I will never change. Well," he added as an afterthought, "maybe I will change after this, for the worse."
"Oh no, Alton!" But he turned abruptly and walked off. She stood staring after him, and through the tears streaming down her cheeks, she saw him wheel around and start back. Stepping in front of her, he tried to take her in his arms. Mustering all her strength, she drew back.
"O.K., Bessie, have your way. I know you hate me for attempting to kiss you, but I've dreamed of it for days," Sadly, he added, "Good luck!" and left hurriedly.
"Oh God, help me," she prayed brokenly as she stumbled toward the house. "I can't make it without Thy help,"
"Hello, Dear," Uncle Jack greeted her as she entered the door. "How are you this afternoon?"
She opened her mouth to answer, but burst into tears and ran from the room. Aunt Mae followed.
"What's wrong, Dearie?" she inquired.
"I'd rather not talk," she choked. "I'd like to be left alone."
"Is it Alton, Bess, Dear?"
"Yes, Aunt Mae. I broke off with him this afternoon, but it was so hard. Please, Aunt Mae, I just want to be left alone. Don't call me for supper." Her sobs were heart-rending.
Aunt Mae kissed her wet cheek and left the room. "We will be praying for you, Dear," she called over her shoulder,
"Jack," she spoke softly upon re-entering the living room, "our prayers have been answered. My heart has been so heavy about our Bessie keeping company with an unsaved man. Sometimes young folk let their hearts rule their head."
"Yes, I know, Mae. After what we went through with Sarah and Ben, I thought I couldn't stand it if Bessie married Alton. Not that I have anything personal against the boy. He's a real gentleman in every sense of the word, and very considerate of others, but he seems so calloused when it comes to his soul's salvation. I've seen conviction on him in a mighty way, but he never makes a move toward God. He could cause Bessie to lose her soul."
"With Sarah, she was so rebellious when she lived with us that it was no surprise when she ended up marrying Ben; but with Bessie, it was different. She's always been obedient and has loved the Lord since she was a little girl. I was shocked that she ever gave Alton a second thought," Aunt Mae declared.
"You have to admit, Mae, that Alton is a very handsome man, and has quite a personality. With him and Bessie being thrown together so much at the Reid's, you can see how it got started."
"Yes, Jack, I can understand. But what puzzles me is that there is Raymond and Jessie, fine Christian young men, and both interested in Bessie, but she never gives them a second glance. I just can't understand it."
'''Well, I'll admit I can't figure her out either, but let's be thankful our prayers have been answered and she broke off with Alton. We must pray now that God will strengthen her in her resolve to do right."
"Let's pray, now, Jack," Mae suggested. "Bessie is brokenhearted." They knelt together and prayed for the girl who was like a daughter to them.