JUNE: (to ADAM) I wasn’t thinkin. I shouldn’t have taken off the shirt. I’d already forgotten the others were there.
ADAM: What is this? What’re those marks?
JUNE: When I was thirteen, fourteen. Used to sit by the wood stove at night. Mum’d drink herself to sleep hopin the old man wouldn’t come home. And once she passed out I used to get a knittin needle. Stick it in the fire. Just keep meself awake. Keep meself to meself.
ADAM: They look like —
JUNE: (bitterly) Yeah, like stretchmarks. Knittin needle. She said she wished she’d used it when she had the chance. Wouldn’t have to put up with the likes of me.
WILL: Fuck, that’s messed up.
ADAM: How long did you do this to yourself ?
JUNE: Wanted to say what happened. Try.
ADAM: Happened?
WILL: Sick little piggy.
BEN: She’s gunna fall in the fire.
JACK: What’re you doing?
WILL: Doing?
BEN: Nothing.
JUNE: I’m fallin.
JACK: Shivering.
WILL: Just lying there.
JUNE: Well. Actually. Somethin did happen.
JUNE sags a moment and is held up by BEN and WILL. They lie her down by the fire. Their predatory faces are lit by firelight. JACK hesitates, anxious, uncertain.
JACK: It was like . . . like the temperature suddenly drops. Her skin’s sandy, and there are bubbles of foam on her belly. And in the firelight, fine hairs like on a peach. But those marks. Scars. Like she’d pulled herself through barbed wire. Not once. But again and again. And then the others.
BEN: Giss a look.
WILL: Fuck, man.
BEN: Fuck.
JACK: You could feel it, the suck of breath. Everyone’s heart rate leaping. It was like a shot of something.
JUNE: Numb. I was numb.
JACK: Damage, that’s what it was.
JUNE: Too numb to feel it comin.
JACK: The sight of damage. Like it did something to them. Us.
WILL: Nothing.
JACK: To us, maybe. I thought: They’re only warmin her up, they’re only muckin around. But they had their hands on her.
JUNE: (woozy) What? Everythin turnin, turnin.
BEN: Cool. She’s got stripes.
JUNE: Like I’m still tumblin in the water. These things, these creatures, bumpin, slidin, nippin at me. Tentacles, mouths.
WILL: Did you do it anywhere else?
BEN: Giss a look.
WILL: Here, let’s slip this off. Oh, looky here.
JUNE: (woozy, obscured) What? What’re you doin?
JACK: Firelight. Hands everywhere. She was wet, shivering.
JUNE: And it’s like I’m lookin up through water.
WILL: Aw, yeah.
JUNE: Lookin for a face. I can’t find his face.
JACK: Got dark. Even in my heart it got dark.
JUNE: No.
BEN: I smell bushpig.
WILL: Mm-mm! Country bacon. Tasty.
JUNE: No. Stop.
JACK: Stop it. What’re you doing?
JUNE: And suddenly he’s there. All wavy and watery in the firelight.
JACK: And I’m standing there, doing nothing. And they’re . . . like she’s a thing.
WILL: Fuck, where’s the camera, get ya phone, mate.
BEN: Nah, I don’t reckon we should.
JACK: Stop it. I should have said it. Done something. But she did it for me.
JUNE: He stopped it. He saved me.
JACK: I just bloody stood there.
JUNE: No! Get off.
WILL: (obscured) Ow! Fuckin bit me!
JACK: And suddenly she’s up.
BEN: Running.
JACK: Right past me.
JUNE: Runnin.
JACK: Out into the dark.
JUNE: The noise, the rain, the night.
JACK: With no one.
JUNE: Just runnin.
ADAM: Jesus Christ.
Blackout.
From left: Adam (John Howard), Ben (Will McNeill), June (Whitney Richards) and Will (Luke McMahon)
SCENE 11
Lights up on JUNE at stage right, dishevelled and shivering at the shore. ADAM watches from his beach house.
JUNE: No wind at all. Don’t know why I remember. But it stopped. Still cold, but the wind had just . . . like the world holdin its breath. I was out of my mind.
ADAM: You were drunk, June. Stoned.
JUNE: I ran into the water. Right up there against the Point, close to the rocks. Could feel the rip suckin at my legs. I was so hot. My skin felt scorched. And the water was so clean and cold. It was good to feel clean. Even if it hurt.
Light on JACK upstage.
JACK: Just a white flash. That’s all I saw.
Light on WILL and BEN on the beach at stage left. Both have a bottle of wine in hand.
WILL: Stupid bitch. I’ll need a rabies shot.
BEN: Maybe we shouldna.
WILL: What?
BEN: Well. Feels weird. I feel crook.
WILL: Pussy.
BEN: Should make sure – maybe.
WILL: I’m outta here. What’re you waitin for? True love?
BEN: The fuck is he?
WILL: Telling her all about his social conscience. His trip to Cambodia.
BEN: I didn’t know he’d been to Cambodia.
WILL: He hasn’t.
BEN: So, what about Cambodia?
WILL: Fuck, man, you must’ve slept the whole way down. All he ever talks about.
BEN: What’s this one? Grenache. Man, where’s Grenache?
WILL: Ask him when he gets in.
BEN: Man, he doesn’t know shit about wine. Told me himself.
WILL: What, when you were learning all about digging wells in Cambodia? Where the fuck is he?
BEN: She got in the water.
WILL: Didn’t see.
BEN: Yeah, full noise, straight in, like it was nothing. Like it was a warm bath she was heading for.
WILL: Like I said, I never saw. Dark. Didn’t see a thing, constable.
BEN: Fuck. Right. And she’s probably just tryna get his attention.
WILL: Creeps me out, that chick. There’s somethin wrong with her.
BEN: Still. Hope she didn’t do anything stupid. I mean we’re just mucking around.
WILL: I don’t recall.
BEN: What?
WILL: My memory’s unclear.
BEN: Oh. Right. (considers this collusion)
WILL: That’s all I know, constable. (peers at the bottle in hand) Constable Cabernet Sauvignon. New, are ya? From what, France, are ya? I don’t care what kind of fancypants detective y’are with ya beret and ya —
BEN: Coz it was dark.
WILL: And she was pissed. A lot of alcohol was involved.
BEN: And if anyone got with her it was —
WILL: Flash Jack Mansfield.
BEN: But we didn’t see it.
WILL: We were up at the house, playin —
BEN: Monopoly.
WILL: Scrabble.
BEN: Nah, it was Monopoly.
WILL: Have it your way, Sherlock. Let’s get hammered.
BEN and WILL collect their stuff and exit.
JUNE: It was like being too close to the fire. Being sucked in. The cold as hot as the fire, hot as my skin. The rip, like the river. Smooth rocks goin by. And I’m awake again, properly awake. Happy.
ADAM: Happy? What’re you talking about? You’re being dragged out to sea.
JUNE: Maybe not happy. Just resigned. Like this was what I was always comin to, to be dragged out like the trash built up in the inlet, somethin best got rid of. Out past the Point it was calm. No rocks, no trees. After a while I could see stars. And when I moved there was a kind of twinkly trail.
ADAM: Phosphorescence.
JUNE: Beautiful. Sparkles, creamy smears and swirls in the black. I thought: I don’t know why I ever worried. Total dark. It’s lovely. Like if this is
it, I don’t mind. I felt light, beautiful. For once I’m beautiful.
ADAM: June, you were in the ocean. Pissed. At night.
JUNE: But that’s how I felt. I want to tell you, give somethin to you. Like a gift.
ADAM: While half in love with easeful death —
JUNE: What?
ADAM: June, those boys —
JUNE: Oh, forget ’em.
ADAM: Forget? How can I forget them?
JUNE: Some people are forgettable.
ADAM: I need to know. That is, can I ask you? Those boys, did they —
JUNE: Rape me?
ADAM: Christ —
JUNE: You could feel it. In the air. Breathe it, feel it comin. That’s what they wanted, where it was goin, even if they didn’t know.
ADAM: And Jack?
JUNE: No. I don’t think so.
JACK: Nothing. I did bloody nothing.
JUNE: It’s not clear. I dunno. I was —
ADAM: Asking for it?
JUNE: Out of it. It just took me too long to feel it comin, see it happenin. Way too long.
ADAM: And Jack? What did he do?
JUNE: Well.
ADAM: What, just sat there?
JACK: Stood. Stood there. Stupid as a bit of driftwood.
JUNE: It’s murky. Like I was underwater.
ADAM: Tell me. No, don’t tell me.
JUNE: It’s orright, it’s okay.
ADAM: How can it be?
JUNE: I’m tryin to give you somethin.
ADAM: What, a fright? Don’t bother to call it a wake-up coz I’ve had all the waking up I want in a lifetime.
JUNE: I just want you to listen.
ADAM: Look, if he hurt you, if he did anything untoward.
JUNE: No.
ADAM: Tell me the truth. No, don’t tell me, I can’t bear it, I’ve got nothing left.
JUNE: He’s frightened of hearin somethin worse. How does it get any worse than what he thinks of Jack? His own son. What do they all want, these people with children? They all thinkin of the knittin needle? That what they think?
ADAM: Look, June, I’m so sorry it happened.
JUNE: What’s that, then?
ADAM: Whatever did happen.
JUNE: Just let me tell you. I felt him come.
ADAM: Oh, good God!
JUNE: Towards me. In the water. And then I could see.
JACK: What d’you do? I mean, I’m on the beach here, totally peakin. It’s night and she’s out there somewhere in the water, in the dark. Black as a dog’s guts, truly, and there’s these little white flashes. Something flickering, flashing. That’s her, that’ll be her out in the channel. So, I dunno what to do, what can I do? But finally I’m doing something. Running. I get me board and just paddle out, lookin for her. Swell’s gone, no waves at all, just the rip goin out along the rocks. And I’m flying. I mean the current’s really fast. When I paddle, every time me fingers go through the water, there’s this creamy light, like milk coming off me fingertips. I mean, I’m a bit stoned, but I know this is real. And suddenly there’s things moving out here, not just water, but bodies, water slapping against things I can’t see. And, then, I’m way the hell out past the Point and the fire on the beach’s gone and I can’t see where I am anymore. There’s this big, smooth rock sliding by and I’m thinking: Mate, there’s no rocks out this far; you’ve got turned around in the dark, you’re lost, this girl’s gunna drown out here in the dark. She’s cactus. And you’ve let it happen.
JUNE: The water gets cold, starts to smell bad. Now I’m shiverin. See these flashes, and I call out.
JACK: Jack!
JUNE: Jack!
JACK: That’s what I hear, real close.
JUNE: And there’s this —
Sound of a great, funnelling expiration. A deep, resonating moan.
JACK: Fuck!
JUNE: And starlight everywhere.
JACK: And there’s a face.
JUNE: It’s him. And I reach out and touch his hand.
JACK: And behind her —
JUNE: Behind him, this black hole.
JACK: With stars in it.
JUNE: Sequins, stars.
JACK: And I pull her on.
JUNE: And he’s warm, like blood, and he doesn’t even say anythin because he’s lookin at somethin there in the dark, in the water, somethin so dark it’s like all the nothin of your life gathered into one place, this incredible starry black —
JACK: Whale.
JUNE: That’s right. A whale.
JACK: An arm’s length away. Breathing on me.
JUNE: Two, three, four of ’em. All round us.
JACK: Just lying there.
JUNE: Breathin.
JACK: Breathing.
JUNE: Stinkin like . . . like anchovy breath. (laughs)
JACK: Are you alright?
JUNE: I can’t believe it.
JACK: Are you alright?
JUNE: What? Yeah. Like I’m freezin me arse off and I’m lost in the sea at night and I’m surrounded by giant mammals. But, yeah, I’m good – I think.
JACK: We stay here —
JUNE: Ages.
JACK: Forget what I’m supposed to be doing out here, how far out we are, what the plan is.
JUNE: Shiny black skin. I can see stars reflected in it.
JACK: And that eye.
JUNE: Starlit, unblinkin eye.
JACK: And they’re here, black as black, pressing like memories.
JUNE: I feel different. I’m cold, yeah, but I can feel them watchin. Like they see me. Really, I can feel it all over. I dunno the right words for it, the feel of being noticed, watched over. And this sighin and breathin and the buzz in the water goin right through me. It was Jack that afternoon, lookin up, when he finally saw me, made me real. That’s how it is in the water, like I’m whole, like I exist. And I feel calm, safe. I’m happy.
JACK: I get hold of her, just hold on to her. We’re both a bit hysterical by now, nearly gone. You know, hypothermic, floaty.
JUNE: Happy.
JACK: Half a mile out to sea. And she’s holding me.
JUNE: He’s holdin me.
JACK: Like she’s safe already.
JUNE: On the beach, by the fire, with only him.
JACK holds JUNE from behind. They are surrounded by stars.
JACK: Like a dream we’re having.
JUNE: No, it’s real. I’m never this cold in a dream. It’s never this black in a dream.
A torrential whoosh of whale breath.
JACK: Never smells this bad, either. Are you kicking?
JUNE: Of course I’m kickin. These boards aren’t all that big, are they?
JACK: Feel that?
JUNE: Like an eddy.
JACK: They’re turning. They know we’re here. Even in the dark.
JUNE: They see us. I looked into an eye. Big, sad as an elephant’s.
JACK: They’re related, you know.
JUNE: Maybe they remember. Like elephants.
JACK: Maybe.
JUNE: That eye. Like a witness.
JACK: They use sonar. That’s how they know we’re here, that’s how they keep track of each other, how they navigate. Echolocation.
JUNE: You mean they can feel us? In the dark?
JACK: I guess. Heartbeats, movement. Yeah. I suppose the bigger, the darker your world, the better you get at it.
JUNE: Look. Their skin looks like sky. Full of light, of stars. We’re kickin away in the dark. And he’s talkin, talkin all the time, like words are just bubblin out of him. I love the sound of his voice. There’s no moon. The fire on the beach is out already. The only light is the house on the hill. So we aim for that. The whales let us through and for a while we hear ’em behind us. And I just hold on to the memory of ’em. I’m goin so numb and my legs won’t work. And I know if he just lets me go he’d get in on his own and I start to feel like I’m killin him, like if it wasn’t for me he’d be fine, like I’m just a load he has to carry. And I start to cry. And he
tries to stop me but I’m hopeless. Made him promise he won’t die.
JACK: June, I promise. No one’s gonna die.
JUNE: He pushes me up onto the board and gets his arms around me so I don’t let go, and then tells me to look at the light up on the hill and tells me somethin he saw when he was a kid that he’d never told anyone else in his life.
JACK: It’s summer, a hot night. We’re down for the holidays, just the three of us, Mum and Dad and me. You can smell the peppermints and the sea and the straw smell of the vines pouring down off the ridge in the breeze. I wake up and go downstairs and they’re both out there on the deck at the rail. Mum’s looking out to sea and he’s behind her. Lifting her skirt.
ADAM: Jesus!
JACK: It’s so thin and fine you can see the ocean through it, fizzing in the moonlight.
JUNE: And her legs were smooth and milky. And there was this song on the stereo. And she was holdin the rail. And you were —
ADAM: What’s he doing telling you something like that?
JUNE: And you pressed into her.
JACK: So . . . gently.
JUNE: And you were whisperin at her. He said it was —
JACK: Beautiful. Like they are one thing, one person.
JUNE: And he knew you loved each other and he was yours. He knew it. He always knew it. I can feel his chest against my back, his arms against my arms. Whiskers at the back of my neck. I can feel all of him, like I’m wearin him.
JACK: When I finally see it the beach is as white as a summer bed.
JUNE: I think he carried me. Up the beach, the track. It’s messy in my head, this bit. We should have yelled, celebrated, but we were too cold, too tired. Soon as we were out of the water I couldn’t feel him, couldn’t feel anythin. But he got us to the house.
JACK: I help the girl upstairs.
JUNE: I think he pushes me into the shower. The room is full of steam, like the inside of my head. Feet just stumps. Can barely feel my hands. And then the water starts to burn. God, it’s like boilin chip fat. I look around and there’s no one in the steam ’cept me, and it hurts.
JACK: I’m watching the kettle come to the boil. She’s still in the shower. I’m shaking, still in me wetty. Ben and Will just lying there. And I open the drawer, see the knives. That boning knife. Their heads tossed back, throats right there. I can feel the knife in my hand before I reach for it. But then she starts crying. The girl upstairs in the shower. Moaning. Like a cow. My hands are shakin. I have to remember what I’m there for. Milo. I’m there for Milo. I close the knife drawer. I make her a hot drink. If she hadn’t made that noise I would have killed them.