to the next
The last man slowly lowered the bag into the water
A sound like the popping of a light bulb
Wait
Hold it
We can’t put it under with a broken bottle
Well we gonna carry it out
No open it up
The men stepped toward the man holding the bag
Each took out one bottle
Throw it out in the deep water
There was a splash
then they all walked stiff-legged toward the white light
I watched the shadows climb up the riverbank
I reached the oars
that slipped between the gas tank and the hull
ripples surged out in the water like the furling of a flag in the wind
I used the oar until the current pulled at the bow of the boat
Clear of the mud I turned it south toward the railroad bridge
and steered between the pilings
Fishing lines hung down in the water
nets dangled at the end of bamboo poles
and I could see the outline of people
My watch read 10:05
I started the motor headed north and tried to remember
the profile of the trees against the sky
I traveled up river to drift back again
and hoped the current would land me in the same part of the river
The boat bumped against the riverbed
moved from side to side
and I could feel a shift in the air
a light wind
then stillness
the canopy of trees blocked the breeze
White light flickered through the trees
I took my oar and pushed toward the light
and the boat slid along the river bottom
until the motor stuck in the mud
Silence
My pulse throbbed in my ear
The oars and gas tank rattled as I climbed out of the boat
I heard a rush in the undergrowth
I paused then I pushed forward through the grass and mud
Soil from the drainage ditches fanned out over the shoreline
covered by a mat of old palm fronds and pine needles
I looked back and saw the outline of my boat
I stepped toward the house and I heard a low moan
glass broke under my shoes
There was someone next to me
Hello Hello
My eyes searched and I leaned forward
came face to face with a young boy
What are you doing
What are you doin
Just curious
Me too
Someone here with you
No he left when you got out of the boat
Why did you stay
I had to
I reached down around my feet and felt a burlap bag
Why
I lost my shoe and I was afraid to run through the weeds
Is this your bag
No
What are you doing with it
I fell on it
I felt a sticky liquid in the burlap mixed with sand and leaves
You see those men before
Yeah
Where they from
One lives in the house They hide these bottles in the river
Yeah I saw them
The bag fell apart in my hands and glass fell out onto the ground
I searched cautiously with my fingers feeling bits of glass sand
I picked up two bottles and asked
How old are you
Fourteen
I held out one of the bottles in the direction of the voice
and it was pulled out of my hand
I stepped back and looked at the light from the house
It doesn’t make sense to hang around here
No
See ya
I turned for my boat
My feet squished in the mud as I stepped through the shallow water
I heard the boy
See ya
(dreams of his mother)
The boy died alone in the dark
under palm trees next to the river
I remembered him
the blood in the bottom of my boat
blood on the burlap bag
He was fourteen
the same age I got drunk for the first time
I marveled at the ridiculous things
that young boys do
I knew the fear and desire that he felt
afraid to go home
wanting to know that feeling of oblivion
wanting to know it
and do it with your best friend
harassed by parents
sent home
the feeling of having those drinks alone
He could not have known he was bleeding to death
I imagined him sleepy and tired
eyes closed
And I wondered what the dreams of his mother were that night
sleeping on land owned by Alan
land like a spider web that stretched
from Mims to Titusville
to Merritt Island and underneath the web
the Indian River waited to catch everyone that fell
omnipresent silent
Damp morning air carried the sulfurous odor of drying seaweed
I looked up at the sky
my eyes followed a path that hovered over the river
I stood on the timbers and rock that made the sea wall
and looked at the water
like the bow of a ship gliding over the silence
Blood flowed in the river like the wake of a small boat
visible for a short time
then disappeared in the ripple of water and sunlight
(cut feet)
I looked at the bottom of my boat in the sunlight
tried to figure out the night before
The wood was wet
red steaks in the corners mixed with mud
The burlap bag I carried through the water was wet and sticky
smelled like fish blood mixed with salty river water
Henry found the boy down by the river in the weeds
about ten steps from where he hid bottles in the shallow water
I wondered if Julia saw the boy
But you don’t often find something
unless you look for it in the first place
Henry said the boy’s feet were cut by broken glass
Blood was on the ground and trailed down
into the water where it fanned out and disappeared
The boy was in pajamas curled up on the ground
His legs were thin and white
almost pale blue
his belly swelled up
and I realized
I was the last person to talk to him
(a dead bird dream)
I stood in a flat boat
Henry waded through the water next to me
near the boy’s blue body
He picked up bottles from the green river bottom
carried a burlap bag through the palms
His feet crushed the dry brown leaves
I drifted behind him
passed through the trees
Bottles fell out of the bottom of the bag
broke on the ground
corks popped out
and blood seeped through the salt grass and weeds toward the river
a sticky red tar formed along the shore
The light from the house burned through the palms
like a match burning through paper
and swallowed Henry
The boy lay on the ground
like a dead bird
(something real)
In the dark
I stood next to Julia at the corner of the house
Alan drove down the dirt road
<
br /> Henry met him in the yard
They walked back to the front porch and talked
Alan asked
You know about that boy
Henry’s Yes sir was firm
Alan told him
He died on my land and I don’t like it
and I’d like to know where those broken bottles come from
Henry spoke
Those were my bottles
They were silent
Alan asked
You want to keep your job get rid of those bottles
Henry was silent
I could picture him looking down at his hands
Alan walked back and forth
I don’t need people down here asking about a dead boy
making something out of an accident
You know how people look at me
He stopped
Henry said
I don’t talk to anyone down here
An accident yes sir
Sarah walked out the front door
What are you doing here Mr. Simmons
Just talking with Henry Just talking
I heard the door hinges grind
and Sarah asked
Are you troubled Mr. Simmons
No Sarah No just thought you and Henry might wonder about things
Sarah let the door close behind her
No sir the sheriff let us know
I heard the heel of Alan’s shoe on the concrete step
the car door closed
Julia pulled at my arm
We walked to the back yard
I thought about you this morning I had a dream about Henry
And
And I just felt like coming out here
Then Alan shows up He looking for you
Always you know
I don’t want to know anymore
(a place in the world)
I felt sorry for Henry in the police car
small in the back seat
Black and white on the door
the black of his skin and the white of his eyes
He seemed to be looking for something through the window
like he needed to find everyone who now inhabited his world
Julia said she thought of Henry like her father
though I wonder if he had said ten words to her
Maybe he is afraid of Julia
Sarah says he is a gentle man and he works hard
Boys that went around the house were afraid of him
He seems to know how a young man can act stupid
They just knew they had to be honest
I knew Henry would tell the police about the broken bottles
and I knew he would be arrested
I stood with Alan next to the policeman
who wondered why Henry was so worried
when it was clear the boy died by accident
He knew the boy
saw him walking in the groves
playing with his friends
He and the other boy were always busy
always had something on their mind
like they were looking for a place in the world
(inside out)
Everyone expressed an opinion about Alan
Aggressive
Arrogant
Cool
Brisk short conversations
Just as no one could avoid talking about him
he could not resist inserting himself into every debate
The rumors would cross town ahead of him
He arrived suddenly
with power
His tan face blonde hair marked him with confidence
the white shirt green pants