***
The next day, I discovered the grotto.
Bodies, the flesh gnawed from them, lied in scattered piles. Blood streaked bare rock in dull black patches. The water itself remained a deep blue hue reflecting a myriad of dark rainbows on the domed ceiling of the cavern. I'd never seen anything so beautiful in my life. Carefully, edging around the piles of discarded remains, I drew closer to the water.
Unlike clear water, my face wasn't reflected within. Only Jessamyn's...her sorrow and the spreading taint of blood. I blinked twice and the image vanished. She'd said the water was tainted, the blood of the Naiad had run like rivulets into the deep pool, corrupting its purity. Trembling now, I knelt at the edge, hesitantly scooping my palm into the water. Its coolness caressed my cupped fingers.
Slowly, the water trickled through my fingers like a sieve. Catching a single droplet on the tip of my finger, I placed it on my tongue and soon spat aside onto the hard ground. The water was sour like blood. That night, Jessamyn hovered above the water, her curtain of strawberry blonde hair floated on the water's surface, her milky white skin glowed a faintly pearlescent light. Less and less, the clumsy yet graceful traits of a human were fading before my eyes.
"Why did you go there?" Her voice had altered its tones, becoming thin and reed-like, faint on the wind. I sat on the rocks, breaking open clamshells. Indifferent to her censure, I countered with a question of my own. "Is it so terrible?"
Jessamyn's eyes flickered. "Terrible beyond imagining."
She was terrible to look upon, my sister. Gradually changing, less and less like a woman and instead something else. Despite her censure, I returned to the cave, crouching down beneath the glittering stalactites. There were things in the cave, broken hand mirrors, bottles of rose water, men's hats, torn linen handkerchiefs. Behind a glittering boulder I discovered a canvas bag with a water-stained book of fairytales inside.
With the waning light of day splashing across the page, I soon became engrossed in the tales of castles, brave knights and beautiful princesses. When the light had quite disappeared over the horizon, I trudged back to my small camp. The sea was smooth, a glassy mirror with fragmented starlight dancing on its surface.
I nibbled on dried fish, lying down in my nest of leaves and woven grasses. Time seemed to stand still in this place. There was no censuring on my behavior, no time which I was forced to rise nor pleasantries to exchange with frivolous girls. I was...liberated, free. With those thoughts in mind, I tucked my legs close to my chest and slept with my head full of fantasy.
Days passed, my supply of dried filets began to run low. But, I wasn't worried. I'd fashioned my own net, casting it in the shallows. The nights were clear, blazing with stars, the days hot. I busied myself forming a more permanent shelter. Four sunsets after I'd last seen my sister, I'd fallen asleep as always yet as sleep left me, I had the sense that someone watched over me. "Jes...," my eyelids fluttered
A soft warmth had settled over me, it smelt of the sea with an underlying musky scent reminiscent of pipe smoke. my dreams fled. I started awake, "Robert!" The sea captain sat across from me on a hollowed log. A wan smile formed on his lips. I scrambled up on all fours, his navy blue coat slid off my shoulders. "You're--," words failed the relief brimming in my heart. I wholeheartedly embraced him
"Alive, yes," he laughed gruffly, holding me at arm's length to look me over. I felt more than glimpsed his eyes linger on my sunburnt legs peeking out from the tattering ends of my dress. "Are you quite alone?"
He nodded, "I made landfall alone. None of the men would set foot here," his gaze roved over the sand dotted with my bare footprints, the trees and pile of broken clam shells and fish scales.
"Why?"
"They think the island's cursed. In the language of the sea, Nuhl Ait is a feared name known as a no man's land."
"No man." I reminded. "Not woman. What? Did they think this was home to Odysseus's giants?"
"I'm afraid not. It's a far different legend associated with this place. The sirens dwell here, luring men from far out at sea to their deaths on the treacherous reefs not two leagues distant from land. Those unlucky enough not to perish in the sea are otherwise taken down into the depths where they're savagely torn apart limb by limb. These creatures are bloodthirsty monsters, consuming the flesh of man." Jessamyn's blood red lips flashed across my mind's eye. I shuddered. Her strange words as if it was getting harder and harder to remember me as her flesh and blood. I couldn't contemplate this fresh horror any longer, huddling in his shadow for comfort.
"Then, how did you, sir, come here, with so brave and stout of heart?"
"If there was the slightest possibility you'd been swept here by a fickle current...I couldn't live with myself knowing I'd abandoned you to a horrifying death." Said he with utmost sincerity. "I...not three days ago as our prow was bent toward a return to familiar waters, the first mate espied a strange fish swimming alongside us. Being of superstitious mind, he thought it an ill omen. The fish was most peculiar, cutting across our forward progress, darting to the side as if to lead us on. I knew not whether this was some new devilry or a sign from God himself, but I bade our course changed and a fair wind came along to hasten our arrival."
Robert touched my face, my cheek crusted with sand. "Truthfully, when I set foot on this island, I had little hope remaining of ever seeing you again." Emotion thickened his voice. "I should never have allowed in good conscience for you to board my ship. Landlocked and safe, that's where you belong, my lassie. Could you ever forgive an old sea dog for his foolishness?"
"A-Anything, Robert." Inside, I quailed for Jessamyn had lured him here. For what purpose I could not divine though my heart sought the goodness of her intentions; I worried too, for the sea only knew how vast her hunger might be. "Robert, I thank you for your care during the long voyage...also for the dedication to my sister, but she...," I tore at my lip, drawing blood. Some of it seeped inside my mouth, moistening my thick tongue. "Oh, Robert! It's terrible....but, you must understand, I can't leave here! Not now! Not ever!" The longer I stared into the boundless depths of his blue eyes, I knew I could no more explain the bond my sister and I shared than destroy it with careless words. As a final motion of severing my ties with our England, I bowed my head, brushing my rough lips over his folded hand.
Somewhere above me, Robert exhaled a resigned breath. "I was afraid you'd say this. Blaming yourself for Jessa...it was, I, Pippa. I, who should shoulder the blame."
Wordlessly, my head lifted, not quite able to comprehend his words. Some coldness in his gaze caused me to draw back against my bower of leaves. He scowled at my withdrawal as if it displeased him. "I was the one who drove her away."
"But," my fingers dug painfully into my thighs. "Why?" My voice had become a plaintive whisper, a child's whimper so low and soft, it was easily lost in the roaring tide of my heart.
"Because, ...I love you."
"No." As if that simple denial encapsulated my horror at the lie he lived.
"You, Pip. So young and vibrant. You made my old heart yearn again for the days of my youth."
Robert's words made no sense to me. I, who had languished with my toys and children's games when other girls my age were seeking matches, talking of roses and their hair done as proper young ladies would. I cared not for those things, they were my sister's world...she, the one who had seemingly grown up past the age when a spinning top might delight the senses.
He had not finished his soliloquy. "Watching you sprawled on the floor, your skirts spread out over your striped stockings. Toes wiggling while you played nine pins with the cat. You wore your hair in ribbons and I thought you quite a child still! How blind I was when the thought of you so childlike and innocent clouded my very existence."
"But, Jessamyn!"
"-oh! Jessamyn...she aged me with her talk of household, burdening me
with her sorrow of no children."
The wind whipped my skirts into a frenzy, tearing my hair loose of its lily binding. I watched him splay his hands open palmed to me, the look in his eyes pleading for me to understand. "Can't you see, Pippa? I am old...yes, but how could I think of building a life with someone who thought of me as one almost dead?"
It was...true. I went numb all over recalling Jessamyn's words to me after her final wave to Robert had vanished. She had whispered to me of his cargo, his worth and the fine house he was building on the Cape. The house that one day might be ours....if my sister had been guilty of anything, it had been her fierce love for me and her need to provide for our futures in a time when society wasn't kind to women alone.
"I...I can't forgive you."
"Even when...Jessamyn is dead?" Robert's voice echoed with the utter hollowness of the forlorn. He stared at me with an expression of misery. "We're both freed with her death...now," he extended his open palm to me as if it were a lifeline. "Come to me."
Robert was wrong. I couldn't forgive myself; with my very existence, I'd driven my sister to flee from the sight of her former love, to cast everything aside...the sob caught in my throat. It was all so monstrous that I could hardly bear myself. "Don't...," I blubbered, thrusting my hand out. "Don't come near me." The powdery grains of sand clung to my bare feet as unsteadily, I backed away. "I don't...love you. I can never love you!" I turned in a single violent motion, running against the wind. The shredded tatters of my nightdress slapped against my legs. I knew he'd follow. He was no more a victim than I, snared in our emotions, trapped in a useless cycle.
Jessamyn had taken herself away to give me a shot at happiness when she hadn't understood my feelings at all. Without her..., I ran along the sand bars, splashing through wet spray that soaked my body. Robert was nearly upon me, seemingly possessed of a young man's strength this night; he caught me 'round the waist and held me thrashing against his broad form. For a moment, he had secured me beneath his arm, then I twisted around and sunk my teeth into the wet matted hair of his forearm. Robert howled and his grip slackened momentarily. Leveraging with my arms, I kicked and punched my way free, falling to the sand. In another moment, he'd be upon me...he'd force me back to the Maida where the surgeon would put me under. His madness had spread thus far, he'd marry me in their company, taking me back to his house on the Cape, where I'd spend my days locked away until he tired of me...or I escaped. He'd...take me from her.
No.
No.
No.
One last surge of energy flowed to my limbs and I pushed up to my feet, not running from the surf and the Maida in the distance at anchor, but running into the water. My legs instantly slogged down, the soles of my feet tore with the jagged edges of broken shells. Still, I pressed on disregarding Robert's useless splashing. He was a man of the sea, but she was of the sea. I closed my eyes as arms snaked around me, they were wet and slippery like the seaweed that washed up on the shore, they smelt of brine and their embrace fastened tight around me, drawing me deeper into the depths of the sea.
-finis
AN: Happy Late Birthday to me (• ◡ •)/ ! No flames, onegai, reviews are love =D
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