“You okay?” he asked.
“Sure, why wouldn’t I be?” I didn’t look at him. I was pretending to be dazzled by the fire, because I didn’t want him to see the lie in my eyes.
“I don’t know. You just looked…surprised out there when…uh…Nathalie and I…you know.”
Where had the smooth-talking lumberjack gone? He seemed to be as awkward as I felt.
“You never said you had a girlfriend, so yeah, I was a little surprised.”
I couldn’t bring myself to be totally honest about how it had stunned me, because he might correctly read that I was beginning to have an interest in him that went beyond painting walls.
“But you and Nathalie are friends. Didn’t she tell—”
“That she had a boyfriend, yeah, but she never told me who he was.” I did look at him then. He looked as confused as I probably had out at the volleyball net.
“So, what? She never mentioned me by name?”
“Right. She just said ‘my boyfriend.’ My boyfriend this. My boyfriend that. My boyfriend, my boyfriend, my boyfriend.”
He furrowed his brow deeply. “Huh.”
“Yeah,” I said. I almost added that it was like he was a trophy, but I had a feeling he was already thinking that.
“So, when you and I were talking…you didn’t think I was coming on to you, did you?”
“Oh, no, of course not,” I lied.
He seemed to think about that.
“I was just being friendly,” he finally said.
“Me too. Totally.”
“I mean, I have a girlfriend.”
“Which I now know.”
“What if I didn’t?”
I went completely still. Not even breathing. I seemed to do that a lot when he was around. “What if you didn’t what?”
“Would it make a difference if I didn’t have a girlfriend?”
“I don’t believe in playing what-if games.”
“It’s not a game.”
“It’s not reality, either.”
He narrowed his eyes.
“Hey, you two,” Nathalie said, dropping down to the floor so she was sorta wedged between us, and almost sitting in Josh’s lap. “What are you doing?”
“Just trying to get warm,” Josh and I said at the same time.
Weird. Great minds and all that. So if we both thought alike, why didn’t I realize he had a girlfriend? Why hadn’t he figured out that I didn’t know? And why hadn’t Nathalie ever said anything? She had to know he was working at my house.
Nathalie took Josh’s hand and began rubbing it. “His hands stay cold for so long after he plays volleyball. It’s insane, isn’t it? That the guys play winter volleyball half dressed?”
“Totally,” I agreed.
“Have you ever seen anything like it?”
“Nope. This much snow and this much cold is a totally new experience.”
“You know what? You should go cross-country skiing with us tomorrow. It’s the best way to get up close and personal with the island.” She rubbed her shoulder against Josh’s. “That would be okay, wouldn’t it? To have Ashleigh come along?”
“Sure,” Josh said with as much enthusiasm as a senior being told he was being demoted to freshman.
“I’ve never skied,” I said, trying to find a diplomatic way to say no-way-no-how was I going on an outing with Nathalie and “her boyfriend.”
“Oh, it’s easy,” Nathalie assured me. “Toddlers can do it. You can use Chase’s skis. He lives next door, so it won’t be a problem to get them, and he’s working at the fudge shop tomorrow, so he won’t need them.”
“I don’t want to butt in…”
She snuggled against Josh. “No problem. Think of us as the welcome committee. Really, it’ll be loads of fun.”
Before I could offer another protest, Chase dropped down beside me. “Hey, what’s going on here?”
“Just getting warm,” I said.
“Ashleigh’s going cross-country skiing with me and Josh tomorrow. She’s going to use your skis.”
“And what if I want to use them?” Chase asked.
“You’re working. You can’t use them.”
“That’s okay,” I said. “If you don’t want—”
“It’s fine,” Chase said. “You can use them. We’ll work out payment Friday night. We’re still going out, right?”
“You two are going out?” Josh asked before I could respond.
“Yeah,” Chase said. “Is that a problem?”
“Not at all. I just didn’t realize—”
“No reason you should, dude. I don’t run my social calendar by you.”
Was I sensing a little tension here?
“I’ll walk you home,” Chase said to me.
“You don’t have to do that,” I said.
“It’s no trouble.”
“All right.” I pushed myself to my feet.
“So my boyfriend and I will see you tomorrow, right after lunch,” Nathalie said.
I almost asked if she knew her boyfriend had a name, and if she knew what it was.
Josh looked at her funny, like maybe he was just realizing that she had this strange habit of never, and I do mean never, referring to him by name.
“Sounds good,” I said.
“Hey, are you guys leaving?” Shanna asked. Before we could answer, she added, “Don’t forget the hayride Thursday night. We’ll be by to pick up everyone around seven. Are you in, Ashleigh?”
“Yeah, she’s in,” Chase said, winking at me.
“Guess I’m in.”
Everything was happening so fast, just when I was getting used to everything happening so slowly.
I bundled myself up and followed Chase outside. I’d forgotten how cold it was. Especially when we turned the corner and the wind from off the lake hit us. I was thinking that buying fur-lined boots wasn’t enough. Finding some fur-lined underwear might not be a bad idea.
“Was something going on between you and Josh back there?” I finally asked.
Chase gave me a crooked smile. “Nah. Not really. Just…you know.”
Actually I didn’t know, which was why I’d asked. But it seemed rude to pester him about something he obviously didn’t want to talk about.
“I mean, couples hook up when they’re kids, and then no one else gets a chance to date,” he said. “That’s all.”
Was he saying that he wanted to date Nathalie?
“But you didn’t hook up with anyone. I thought it was because you like fudgies.”
He shrugged. “That’s what Nathalie thinks.”
Did that mean it wasn’t true?
“So, what do you think of island life so far?” he asked. I guess he could see that I was trying to figure out what he was really saying—and he didn’t want me thinking about it.
“Love the fudge,” I said, grinning.
He grinned back. “Yeah, it’s hard to beat.”
“Everything seems to move slower here.”
“You should see it during the summer.”
“Do things speed up then?”
“No, not really, but you can find more things to do. Horseback riding. Bicycling. Hiking. Lots of good hiking trails and caves to explore.”
“I guess there’s more to this island than I realized. So about this hayride…”
“Shanna’s dad owns one of the freight companies, so they have these big old wagons. Every year they load hay onto a couple of them, and we ride over the island, stopping at houses along the way for apple cider. It’s fun. Did you not want to do it?”
“Oh, no, I’d love to. It sounds like a lot of fun.”
“Great. And don’t worry. We haven’t even had our date yet, so we won’t kiss if you don’t want to.”
I released a slight laugh. “Excuse me, but this city girl has never been on a hayride. Is there something special I need to know?”
He grinned. “Hayrides are good for kissing. A natural way to keep warm.”
“Ah,
I see.”
He held up his hands. “But like I said, no pressure.”
“Thanks…I think.”
We arrived at Chateau Ashleigh.
“Thanks for walking me home,” I said.
“Sure. I’ll see you Thursday.”
He walked off. And I went inside.
Mom was in the parlor, curled up on the couch, in front of the fire. She smiled at me. “Have fun?”
“Oh, yeah.”
On Mom’s lap was her Teatime book. A couple of Post-its were sticking out of it. I guess she’d tried some more sandwiches while I was gone.
“I’m going cross-country skiing tomorrow,” I told her. “With Nathalie and her boyfriend.”
Didn’t that sound exciting?
“You don’t ski.”
“Apparently it’s not that hard.” I sat in the chair, pulled off my boots, and brought my feet up underneath me. “I’ve been thinking, Mom. There are a lot of bed-and-breakfasts on this island. Why don’t we open a dinner-then-bed inn? You know, something different, something that doesn’t require getting up early?”
She gave me a look and said, “Nice try.”
“So he had a girlfriend this whole time?” Tara asked later, when I called her.
“Yeah.”
“And he never said anything?”
“Nope.”
“Jerk.”
I don’t know why I grimaced at her harsh tone. What did I care if she liked Josh or not? I didn’t. Still, I felt compelled to say, “He thought I knew.”
“But he never talked about her. How much can he like her if he never talks about her?”
Tara was no doubt basing that opinion on the fact that she talked about Shaun all the time.
“It’s not like we’re best buds,” I mumbled.
“But he should have said something! Especially since he knew you knew her.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“You were really starting to like him,” she said.
“No, not really.” Okay, I really was. I mean, the whole encounter on the ladder had gotten to me, but I didn’t want to talk about it anymore. To change the subject, I said, “So how are things with Shaun?”
“Things are great. We’ve actually been talking about coming up there to spend some time before winter break is over. Think your mom would give us a special on two rooms?”
“Hey, for you the rooms would be free.”
“Seriously?”
“Oh, yeah. I mean, we’re not even set up yet to register guests. Mom and I wouldn’t even know where to start.”
“So when would be a good time to come?”
“Are you serious?”
“I think so. I’ll double-check with Shaun. I think he was excited about the idea, but you know sometimes it’s hard to tell with him if he’s really excited.”
I did know.
“That would be awesome if y’all would come.”
“Yeah, it would be. I miss you, Ash.”
“Not as much as I miss you. It’s really, really different here.”
And that was, quite possibly, the understatement of the year.
“So what are you going to do about Josh?”
Tara could be sidetracked for only so long.
“I don’t know. I have to think—”
“Oh, sorry. Shaun’s here. I’ve gotta run. I’ll call you later.”
Only I knew she wouldn’t. Because with Shaun there, later would be really late. So it was left to me and me alone to figure out how I was going to get out of going cross-country skiing with Nathalie and her boyfriend tomorrow.
The truth was I didn’t want to see Nathalie hanging all over Josh. Because, yeah, Tara was right. I had really started to like him.
9
“Are you ready?”
I was standing on the ladder, working on the stenciling. I had been all morning. It was something to do. Unfortunately, it was a brainless activity, so I’d had way too much time to think about my afternoon plans.
Josh had been in the room next door most of the morning, moving furniture around, covering it up, and removing the old wallpaper before putting up the new. Or at least, that’s what I assumed he was doing. I’d heard a lot of banging, bumping, and scraping going on.
But this was the first time that we’d actually spoken to each other that morning. He was standing in the doorway now, jacket on but unbuttoned, as usual.
“Listen, you go on ahead. I want to finish this up,” I said with a casual wave toward the stencil. Purple tulips.
“You’ve got a few more hours’ worth.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Nathalie’s expecting us.”
“Like I said, go ahead. You and her. Go have your time together.”
“She wanted to share the island with you.”
“Yeah, well, it’s always awkward being the odd number in a group.”
“So I’ll be the odd number.”
I just stared at him. Did he not get what I was saying?
“How can you be the odd number?” I asked.
“Two girls, one guy. It even makes more sense for me to be the odd one.”
“Except you and Nathalie will be all snugly—”
“It’s a little awkward to snuggle on skis. Besides, I packed enough food for all of us.”
“Excuse me?”
“Lunch. I brought lunch. Oh, and be sure to wear good hiking boots. I want to show you something special, and we’ll need to hike there.”
He turned and disappeared from the doorway.
“Hey, wait! Come back! I really don’t want to go!”
Only, he didn’t wait, he didn’t come back, and I still really didn’t want to go.
Well, okay, maybe I did a little. I mean, cross-country skiing did sound like something that would be fun, exciting even. I did want to make the most of the winter. And Josh had offered to show me something special, which of course piqued my curiosity. Although I couldn’t admit that to him, or even to myself.
Because I could have no interest in him whatsoever. He was officially off-limits as dating material.
I scrambled down the ladder and hurried to my room where I put on layers of clothing: a T-shirt, a Henley knit top, a thick sweater, a parka, jeans, two pairs of socks, and yes, my hiking boots.
Josh was waiting for me by the door, a huge backpack at his feet. “I already told your mom that we were heading out.”
“What made you so sure I’d show?”
“The something special.”
“What is it, exactly?”
“You’ll see.”
He shrugged into his backpack. When we got outside, he lifted a pair of skis that he’d obviously set there earlier.
It took us less than five minutes to get to Nathalie’s. Only when she came to the door, she wasn’t dressed for hiking. She was still in her PJ’s, holding a Kleenex to her nose. “Sorry, guys,” she said with a raspy voice, “but I’m miserable. Go on without me.”
“We can’t do that,” I said. “This was your idea.”
“It’s okay, really.” She sniffed. “And I’ve been before.” She coughed. “You can use my skis.” She pointed toward the corner of the porch, where some skis were set. “Have fun.”
She closed the door.
Until that moment I hadn’t realized that being a third wheel was sometimes better than being the second wheel. Josh and I stood there, both stumped as to what to do next.
He finally cleared his throat. “Well, huh.”
“Yeah,” I said. “What now?”
“Well”—he cleared his throat again—“I guess you and I go. I mean, unless you really don’t want to.”
Why put it on me to bail out?
“Do you want to?” I asked.
“Yeah. I really do. I had to talk Dad into giving me the afternoon off. And since I don’t usually go to a lot of trouble to fix lunch, it seems a shame to waste the effort. Besides, there’s the thing I want you to see.”
He
said all of this while staring at the door like he was talking to it. I almost expected it to respond.
“Okay, sure,” I said, doing a perfect emotionless imitation of Shaun of the Dead.
I edged past him and picked up the skis.
“I’ll carry those,” he said.
We walked up the street a ways and then he took a turn down another street. My breath was visible, and I concentrated on it, breathing through my mouth, trying to form smoke rings. It didn’t really work.
“Are you mad at me or something?” Josh asked after a while.
“No, not mad.”
“But you’re something,” he said.
“Yeah, something.”
“Are you gonna make me guess what it is?”
I thought about it. Sighed. Decided to tell him what was bugging me.
“You could have mentioned you had a girlfriend.”
“You could have mentioned you had a date with Chase.”
“Why would I mention that?”
“Why would I mention that I had a girlfriend?”
I stopped dead in my tracks. “Uh, maybe because having a girlfriend is a big deal, and maybe I had the impression you liked me—”
He spun around and faced me. I swallowed hard. He looked angrier than I was.
“Like I said, I thought you knew,” he ground out.
“Well, I didn’t.”
“But you still made plans to go out with Chase, so whether or not I had a girlfriend didn’t really seem to be an issue for you.”
“When he asked I didn’t even know you! So, what? I’m supposed to cancel my date with him when I meet you? Or say to you when we met, ‘Hey, guess what? I have a date!’ Why would I even think you’d care?”
“Same goes! When exactly was I supposed to announce that I had a girlfriend? When we were discussing paint?”
“I don’t know. It just seems like there was a moment, sometime, when you could have said—”
“Well, there wasn’t, so get over it.”
“Okay, then.” I clapped my gloved hands in front of his face. They didn’t make a sound nearly as loud as I wanted. “I’m over it.”
“Great.”
“Yeah, great.” It just didn’t feel great. “So what are we doing here?” I asked.
“We’re going cross-country skiing, and I’m going to show you something.”