“But one time you did. Daddy was really mad.”
“It’s okay, bug, daddy’s not mad at anyone,” Paxton offered through the rearview mirror. Like he was the one who wanted to stop it. His hand over mine, and the look for me to shut up, caused me to drop it, but only until they weren’t around. Solid my ass.
The conversation quickly returned to five and six-year-old chatter. Rowan got an A+ on her math test, Vander missed the word, foot because he thought the oo was a u. I rolled my eyes, recollecting the same discussion on the way to school. He knew it was two o’s. Ophelia didn’t have much to say. Something was on her mind, something that had to do with her telling her daddy something at a time I didn’t remember.
Her tune changed when Paxton announced our destination. “So, the other day when I was out driving. I found this really cool skate park,” he teased. Vander and Ophelia bit right on his hook, excitement expressed through high-pitched shrills.
“I don’t want to go,” Rowan announced.
“We’ll go for a walk. Your dad can hangout with Vander and Phi. Deal?” I questioned with an open palm.
“Okay,” she agreed with zero excitement. None whatsoever.
Our evening was filled with love and fun. Even Rowan went down a couple of the ramps, sitting on her butt, of course, but she did it. She and I took a short walk, and I may have used her to do a little detective work.
With her hand in mine, I asked the loaded question. “Do you know why your sister doesn’t like it when I help out in the carpool line?”
“Well, because one time you did it and she told daddy at supper.”
“Yeah? You have to help me remember that. Was daddy mad?”
“Yes, but his voice wasn’t mad. Just only his eyes. He said you had to go to his office and stay there till he came and got you. It was a long time.”
I guided her with my hand, to take the next path to the right, back the way we’d come. “Go this way. How long.”
“Um, I forget. Like two sleep times.”
“Two days? I didn’t see you for two days?”
“No, Dad was mad. Ophelia sneaked out of bed and listened. I told her not to, but she doesn’t listen good.”
I smiled, moving her long blonde hair behind her back. “Not always. What did Phi say?”
“She ran back because she was afraid Daddy would hurt you. She said she heard him, and he was calling you bad names, and he heard him hit you a bunch of times. But, Phi lies, a lot. I didn’t believe her.”
“What did you believe?” I questioned as anger from the past seeped into my heart. We had a room right up the stairs that he could have murdered me in, and he chose to take a chance on them hearing us. How stupid could one man really be?
“Daddy said you was sick and you had to stay in your room.”
I let it go at that. I could tell by her tone that she didn’t believe that any more than Ophelia did.
Chapter Nine
Paxton
I personally thought we had a great evening. All three kids were ecstatic about the new baby, all making bets on a brother or sister. Of course, the girls wanted a sister and Vander wanted a brother. I didn’t care. I wanted my basket-case wife to cut me some slack.
We were out later than we’d planned, just because we were having a good time. I took them to an Italian restaurant where Gabriella could order anything off the menu she wanted without the meat, and the kids could fill up on pizza. It was good, a lot of fun, but something was up. Something was always up. Gabriella held my hand, and kissed me when I kissed her, but she was distant, and once again, that thing fell between us. That very thing that seemed to always show up. The one thing keeping me from building the solid foundation I should have built from the beginning.
It wasn’t until the kids were in pajamas, vegged out in front of Disney that she finally opened up. I watched her get up from between Rowan and Vander and walk to the kitchen from my desk. Rather than waiting until the kids were in bed, I followed her.
“Dad, will you bring me juice?” Ophelia asked from the floor.
“No, you’re not getting juice on the sofa. Come to the kitchen.”
“I will after this.”
“Want some tea?”
“No, I’d rather have one of your drinks.”
“Yeah, me too.”
“You know things wouldn’t escalate so much if you’d just talk to me.”
Gabriella leaned against the counter and crossed her arms, her lips sputtering with the exhausted breath. “I’m trying to remind myself that you’re not that same person.”
“What person? Did you remember something?”
Her lips pursed like she was about to say something, but then she changed her mind. “No, I don’t remember it. I wish I did. Your daughters do, and I’m sure you do.”
I ran both my hands through my hair, relinquishing the same exasperated breath. “Yes, I know what you’re talking about. Ophelia’s outburst when we picked them up, right?”
“She still remembers it. Rowan told me the basics, maybe you can fill in the rest. I didn’t want her to have to do that.”
“You asked Rowan?” That pissed me off, and once again we were right back to square one, but I stopped it.
“Who else is going to be honest with me?”
“This has to stop, Gabriella. We’re never going to get anywhere if we keep this up. Why would you bring Rowan into it?”
Gabriella stood and walked toward me while I thanked God for the island between us. “You kept me from my kids for your own sick needs. How the fuck do you think I should react? She heard you, Paxton. You frightened the hell out of both of them, and then you told them I was too sick to see them. What the hell was wrong with me? I mean, I’m beginning to think I had a brain injury then, too. You ripped their security right out from under them. Why? For what?”
My eyes shifted to the dirt below my nails while I tried to think of a good excuse. Hurting Rowan and Phi was the last thing I wanted to do. There were no excuses. “I didn’t want a wife who put herself out there like that.”
“Like what? Like helping out at my kid’s school? What does that mean? Oh wait, you mean cheerleader status. You didn’t want me putting myself out there like that in fear of someone paying attention. Someone that I could possible cheat with. Right, Paxton?”
I shrugged both shoulders and let out the same exhausted breath with zero words.
Gabriella snorted and walked away. “Put the kids to bed. I’m going to sneak out for a walk.”
“You’re running. I can’t change anything, Gabriella. That’s sort of what happened, but only worse. The details are better left in the past, or at least until you remember them on your own. I don’t know what you want from me. I’m trying with everything in me to make this work with you.”
Gabriella let me take the tips of her fingers, but she never looked up. “And what if it doesn’t, Paxton? What if it’s too broken to fix?”
“It’s not, baby girl,” I quietly spoke.
She blew out a puff of air and walked away from me. I stared at her, but let her go, hoping like hell she wasn’t right. Was it too broken?
Regardless of whether it was too broken or not, I was about to break it a little more, and I knew it before I ever followed through. I didn’t care enough to stop myself though. I had to know who this person was that required erasing history on her phone, and I knew I wouldn’t quit until I found out. I couldn’t help thinking about Lane. That was the only person who crossed my mind, over and over. Who else did she know? I watched her silhouette disappear, realizing what a loaded question that was. Who knows what else she hid from me. Half of it she didn’t even remember.
I started the bed warning’s fifteen minutes ahead of time, from my office, while I logged onto my account and went through her call history. Two inbound calls from the same number, one lasting two-minutes, seven-seconds, and one lasting fifty-six minutes. That very morning. Who the fuck was this?
Plugging the number
into one of those reverse number things didn’t do shit. It got my hopes up and then wanted my credit card number. I did learn one puzzling thing, though. It was a Texas number. I only knew one person from Texas, and there was no reason for her to speak with her. Without another thought, I typed the number into my phone and walked back to the kitchen, away from meddling ears that blabbed to mommy.
I paced, feeling the blood rush to my head as I hyped myself up to lay into Lane. If his voice answered my call, Gabriella was right. We were too broken to fix. I couldn’t keep doing this Lane thing, all the lying, and going behind my back. If Lane answered this call, I didn’t know if our foundation would hold us.
“Hello.”
“Um, who is this?”
“You called me. Who’s this?”
“Tatiana?”
“Paxton. Jesus, I don’t hear one single word in over six years, and now suddenly I’m the most popular person in your family. What do you want?”
I was speechless. Tatiana? What? Why? “I um, I’m sorry. Why are you calling my wife, and what the hell are you talking to her about for an hour?”
“I really don’t want in the middle of your marital problems, Pax.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“Yeah, whatever. I like her. I’m glad she’s so in love with my daughter, but I don’t want any part of this.”
“Part of what?”
“What happens if she’s not yours? Then what? Are you going to give her back to me?”
I scooted Vander out of the kitchen with a light tap to his butt. “This is a really important call. Give me a couple minutes. Go brush your teeth.” I turned my confused attention back to my ex-wife, trying to understand what the hell she meant by that. “Rowan? Are you talking about Rowan not being mine? Why would you say that?”
“Look, I only called her back because she sounded so desperate in her email.”
“What email?”
“The one where your wife begged me to call her regarding Rowan. Does she really have amnesia?”
“Yeah, something like that. What did you say to her?”
“I told her the truth.”
My head pounded with a pain that wasn’t there before I heard Tatiana’s voice. What the fuck? “What truth. She doesn’t even know you.”
“She told me about the baby. Congratulations.”
I was so fucking confused. This hit me below the Lane belt. “Tatiana, why are you talking to my wife?”
I heard a heavy sigh before she spoke again. “She wanted to know if you were Rowan’s real dad.”
“Why?”
“Come on, Pax. Think about it.”
“Think about what?”
“Seriously? I wasn’t exactly faithful to you, and Rowan looks a hell of a lot—“
“Like you,” I interrupted, her words being cut off before she said it. “Wait, did you really think I took her from you without knowing? I had her tested the day she came out of your cheating ass.”
“You did?”
“Totally. What the fuck did you tell my wife?”
“Whoa, buddy. She contacted me, you called me, and I didn’t tell her anything. I told her I didn’t know. I didn’t. That’s the truth. I was certain she belonged to Roddy Brady.”
“The forty-niners? Him too? How many guys were you with while you were with me, Tatiana?”
“Does it really matter? I’m glad you found Gabriella. She sounds like a lovely, loyal young lady, and I could tell by the sound of her voice that she loves my daughter.”
“She’s not your daughter. You walked out on her.”
The silence on the line lasted, at least, thirty seconds. “You didn’t give me much of choice.”
“You didn’t want one.”
“Look, Pax. I’m not saying that you’re not right. You are. I was young and my aspirations were far from what yours were. I had a family growing up, and I wasn’t ready for my own. That was your dream.”
I almost argued with her, but stopped, realizing that I didn’t care, and none of it mattered. “I’m sorry, she involved you. She’s going through something right now. She’s sort of crazy.”
Tatiana laughed with a short puff of air. “I like her. I’m glad she’s there.”
“Yeah, hey. I’m sorry for everything. I hope you’re happy, and you’re right, we didn’t belong together. Take care, Tatiana.”
“Yeah, you, too, Pax.”
I growled, mixing the raspy lump in my throat with a heavy sigh. All this drama for that? I planned on killing her, slowly. Why didn’t she just fucking ask me? For Fucks, sake. It was actually almost comical, but not really. I was still going to plant her six-foot under the sand.
Once I rallied my troops and talked them into Rowan reading the bedtime story, I did my own sneaking from the kitchen where I could watch for my wife. The wife that I planned on stabbing with a fork.
“This fork,” I said just as Mi answered, stabbing the chefs fork into the butcher block.
“What?”
“Oh, hey, Mi. Sorry, I was just going over in my mind what I planned on doing to your friend.”
“You’re going to fork her?”
“No, shut the hell up. I’m going to stab her with a fork.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Yeah? Well, maybe you should tell me what the hell she’s been up to. I just got off the phone with my ex-wife, Tatiana, ring any bells?”
Mi was right quick to speak up. Speak up and lie. “Sorry, it doesn’t. See you later.”
“Don’t you dare hang up on me. Why on God’s green earth would she think Rowan didn’t belong to me?”
“I can’t talk to you. Talk to Gabby.”
“Mi, I’m calling Nick,” I threatened with a conniving attempt to keep her from hanging up.
“God, for a detective junkie, I sure do suck.”
“You do. Stick to delivering babies. Spill.”
“Fine. Gabby thinks the girls aren’t yours.”
“Why?”
“Because of the videos.”
I had to coax her with every sentence. Mi was determined to only give me what I forced from her lips. “The one she won’t tell me about, even after I told her? That one?”
“Yup, that’s it. Well, see ya.”
“Mi, what was on the video?”
“Where’s Gabby? You should ask her?”
“She’s not here.”
“You better not hurt her.”
I watched her white sundress come into view, hurrying Mi along. “Mi, shut the hell up and tell me what has her so crazy.”
“Well, she’s going to find out in a couple days. She left her purse in the bathroom for me today with all the DNA.”
“What DNA?”
“Yours, Rowan’s and Phi’s.”
“Why Phi?”
More silence.
“Good Lord. She thinks Ophelia doesn’t belong to me, too?”
“I didn’t say that.”
I shook my head from side to side, trying like hell to figure out where this all came from and how on earth she came up with this cockamamie story. “Why would she think that?”
“Because Lane thought that, too.”
I watched Gabriella open the screen door, rushing Mi as fast as I could without coming unglued. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“That’s why he left. He didn’t want his squishy face wife to find out about Phi.”
“This is un-fucking-believable, Mi.”
“Mi? Why are you talking to Mi?”
“Gotta go,” Mi announced hearing Gabriella’s voice, right before hanging up.
I didn’t waste a second because I was wound tighter than a ten day clock. I couldn’t hold it in for one second. “Why the fuck would you think Rowan and Phi don’t belong to me?”
Chapter Ten
Gabriella
My wide eyes darted around the kitchen in search of little people. Surely they weren’t in bed already. We were still in the, I
need a drink, and, I have to pee, stage. That blindsided me. “You don’t have to worry about Mi anymore. I’m killing her,” I assured my very angry husband with a pounding heart, and an adrenaline rush worse than riding in a blimp, high above the world.
“You’re not going to have to. You’re going to be dead. Spill it, Gabriella. No more lies. Tell me what the fuck is going on.”
I played the card, knowing it wouldn’t work before I tried. “Why do you think something’s going on?”
“I’m not fucking around, Gabriella.”
I surrendered with both hands in up in the air. “Okay, let me go say goodnight to the kids.”
“The kids are fine. It’s Friday night. I bribed them with money. They’re in Vander’s room, and Rowan is in charge of reading.”
“Did you know she was reading chapter books?” That didn’t work either. “Okay, okay. I’ll tell you everything.”
“Right this second is the perfect time to start. It was that fucking video, wasn’t it?”
I looked down and nodded, deciding to get it out. It wasn’t like I was good at sneaking around, and Mi sucked worse than me. “I swear I was going to tell you.”
“Yeah, Mi told me. Right after you got our DNA tests back?”
“I hate her.”
“Why?”
“Because she has a big mouth.”
“Gabriella.”
The tone assured me I was done. Out of obstacles. I dropped to the stool Vander sat in and tapped my nails, happy for the island, keeping him from getting too close. “I had sex with Lane after that night.”
“So you were fucking around? The whole time? What about this, Gabriella? Is this all a fucking act, too? You’re a fucking cunt. I mean, what the fuck?”
“If you’re going to be mean, I’m not doing this.” I threatened with a weak tone. I couldn’t even look at him. That didn’t go as planned, not at all. I was supposed to get the results before I had to tell him this part, hoping that at least one of them was his.
“Mean? You’re lucky that island is between us.”
“Yeah, I know,” I said, my words coming out cockier than I meant. Actually, I didn’t mean to say that out loud at all. It just fell out. “You have to remember that I don’t remember that.”