Chapter Twenty-Six
April, 2030
Suella didn’t know if she’d ever get used to the security. She still insisted on accompanying Natalie to her annual physical around her birthday. To do it, she had to drive to Riverside and park her car on the Waldheim grounds. A driver from the school would take them to the Lifewind center, another hour-long drive through the desert. The year before, she’d resented them sending two chaperones, putting one in the front seat and one in the back. It cheated her out of the private conversation she could be having with her daughter.
She’d hated the chaperone who’d sat in the back seat with them. He was a brown-haired, middle-aged man with thin, severe lips named Gerald. Along with speaking to her in short, three-word sentences, he also wore glasses with frames that barely covered the whites and irises of his eyes. In another life, Suella imagined, Gerald might have forced Jewish people onto cattlecars in 1940s’ Poland or served on a witch hunt jury in 1600’s Salem.
Maybe this year would be different, she told herself as she neared the center complex. It was Natalie’s sixteenth birthday, after all and maybe the school was teaming up to do something special for her. When she arrived in the lobby, she saw Gerald’s face again and all the air rushed out of her balloon. Oh well, she thought. At least this year he’s dressed sort of normally and smiling, a little. “Mrs. Worthy! So nice to see you again. Do you remember me? I’m Gerald Knockwood.”
“Yes, I remember,” Suella said, weakly shaking his hand. “Wait a minute. What did you say your last name was?”
Gerald grinned wryly. “It’s Knockwood. You know, like knock, knock, knock on wood. I never heard the end of that when I was a kid.”
“I would guess not,” Suella said. Suddenly she heard Natalie’s voice, which had become the most beautiful music to her ears.
“Mom!” Natalie had run down the stairs from the girl’s tower and continued running until she crashed into her mother, nearly toppling her. They stood and hugged for a long time, Suella rocking Natalie softly, cooing to her the way she did when she was a baby. They’d been apart since Christmas, and Suella hadn’t even taken a good look at Natalie yet. Hugging her, though, she could tell that her daughter was eating well and had been bathed in a delightful lavender essence, possibly from some of the sprays and potions Suella had sent in her many packages to the school.
After a few more moments of the warm embrace she stepped back, still holding Natalie’s hands, so that she could look at her. She seemed the same as she had four months earlier--perhaps a few more colorless hairs framing her face--but that was it. Natalie was allowed online, since it was so vital for her education, yet they forbade a cam inside her room or in her linkup. This frustrated Suella greatly, and she even called Fisk at one point to see if there was anything he could do. “I’m sorry,” he’d said, “my hands are tied.”
“Mom, you look great,” Natalie said, smiling. “Still hitting the tramp every other day, right?” Suella had purchased an indoor trampoline years ago and had worked out an elaborate series of hour-long routines on it.”
“Well, I have to keep up with you, child,” she told her.
Gerald loomed up between them and forced a smile, clearing his throat.
“They’ve got the shuttle ready outside,” he said. “What do you say we get a move on?”
Suella dutifully climbed into the rear seat of the Magna-van, with Gerald sitting on the other side of Natalie once again. She sighed. There was no way they would stop for chili dogs on the way back. Still, as the van angled away from the curb and connected for the trip to the desert, she tried to have the most private conversation with Natalie that she could. “How are things/” she started.
“Mostly luke,” Natalie said. “I’m playing soccer again.”
This delighted Suella, since during Christmas Natalie had told her that her right knee was creaking worse than it had and it had started to hurt, as well. “That’s great!” she replied. “Did they get a team together at your school?”
Natalie shook her head. “Intramurals. They let me play at Polytechnic high.”
“That’s fantastic,” Suella said. She was going to ask something, but stopped herself and tried to think of an appropriate segue for the next subject.
Natalie wasn’t fooled. “What?”
Suella waved a hand dismissively, shaking her head, still desperate to think of something else to talk about. “Oh, nothing.”
“What, mom? I know you! What were you going to say?”
Suella sighed. “Okay. Do you promise not to do your rolling-eyes thing and get upset?”
Natalie held up a hand, as if to pledge. “I promise.”
“I was going to ask if there are other white girls in your league, besides you.”
Natalie’s mouth dropped open. “I knew it! I knew it! Yes, mom, there’s other white girls. And everybody speaks English. This is 2030, you know! Not 2010.”
“And you don’t have to go through metal checkers or body cavity open MRI’s either, right?”
“No. Mom, that’s so q! You’re living in the past.”
“I worry,” Suella said, laughing. “That’s a mother’s job!” They sat together for the next few miles, watching the desert landscape and panel fields go by. “How have they been feeding you? What have you been eating?”
Natalie said “Soylent Green!”
Suella double-taked. How did Natalie know about that? “What?” she asked.
Natalie laughed. “That’s what David calls the shamrock pudding they serve in the cafeteria. He says it comes from some old movie he saw once, that was made before even you were born. About how aced up the future is supposed to be. Those kind of movies are funny.”
“Oh. Well, who’s David?”
Her daughter smiled warmly, as if she was reliving a fond memory. “He’s this guy I know.”
“Oh.” Suella nodded. “Did you meet him at Polytechnic, or does he go to your school?”
Gerald startled her by interrupting in his deep voice. “David’s at the center, yes.”
That son of a bitch, Suella thought. It was a cruel reminder that he was following their conversation, like a splash of cold water on her face. She leaned over and tried to glare a dagger at him. “Thank you very much, Mr. Knockwood.”
“Your welcome,” he said, greeting her look with a twisted smile.
“By the way, I call the shamrock pudding ‘soylent green,’ too.”
Suella fought off an urge to say “Shut your piehole, weirdo,” and turned her attention back to Natalie. “So have I ever met or seen David?” There would have only been one opportunity.
“Yeah, I think so. He was there for Christmas. He has fair skin but really dark hair, and he’s tall and thin.”
Suella tried to think back to Christmas, when all of the parents of the kids attending the school got together with their parents in a huge gymnasium and celebrated Christmas together, with full security protocols operating, of course. She’d spent so much of that day focusing on Natalie and crying that all of the other kids could have been African midgets for all she knew. A few of the parent’s faces came to mind. She and Nathan had sat with them all in the lobby while the Waldheim staff organized things for the holiday morning. “What do his parents look like?”
Natalie shrugged. “Well, his dad’s tall just like him. But he’s wider and his hair has gray in it. His mother is Filipino, really pretty.”
It all came back. “Oh my god, is her name Claudette?”
Natalie stopped to think for a moment and her eyes brightened when she said “Yes, I think so.”
She glanced at Gerald before responding, feeling safe that he was checking a miniscreen, probably lost in it. “Yes, I met her in the lobby last Christmas.” And, at the center, about fifteen years ago, she silently added, remembering their conversation from back then. For the rest of the w
ay to the center, Suella felt inhibited from exploring any further conversations with Natalie.
On the one hand, she wanted to tell Knockwood to go fuck himself, that she only got to see Natalie three times a year if she was lucky, and this time they were going to talk their heads off to each other. The other hand won out, though, because if she and Natalie explored a conversation of any depth, both of them would break down in uncontrollable tears, clinging to each other for life. She held Natalie’s slender hand, enjoying the warmth of her touch, which was the best solution of all.
The magnavan arrived at the front gate for Lifewind moments later. As soon as the doors opened, Gerald led Natalie briskly toward the lobby area. The driver took the other position, beside Suella and marched her toward the entrance, also. Once security waved them through, a nurse received Natalie and guided her toward the examination rooms. Natalie looked back at her mother apologetically, an expression that caused a hard lump in Suella’s throat. Her daughter said “See you in awhile, mom.”
Suella had no choice other than to sit in the same dreary lobby she’d sat in for the past sixteen years. She wondered why she even bothered to come along. Maybe all was not lost. She kept alert for passing nurses she recognized, and moments later a woman with ash blond braided hair and smooth skin walked past. Suella called out “Excuse me, miss,” and waited for her to stop. “Is Dr. Allende here today?”
She narrowed her eyes. “Of course.”
“Well, I figured she was but I was surprised she didn’t come out to greet us this time. Could you make sure she knows I was hoping to see her? I’m Suella Worthy.”
The nurse nodded. “Yes, I know. I’ll tell her.”
Suella tried to kill time by searching files and video, trying to prepare for her next client session. She even managed to negotiate with a client using text. Still, she sat.
Was it taking longer this time than usual? And was it her imagination, or was the center a much less friendly place than it used to be? Of course it was always a cold and clinical place, even during the excitement when Natalie was born. While she pondered all of this, she heard Dr. Allende’s distinctive soprano melody as she called out “Hello Mrs. Worthy.”
Suella stood up to follow the ever-dapper doctor around a hallway maze to her office. She studied her for changes, but all she could see was a slightly thickening middle and a few flecks of gray in her hair. Once both of the women sat down the doctor dispassionately called up a few screens and manipulated them so that they could both see the figures whizzing past. “Natalie’s doing very well, I know that these numbers may not mean much to you but her labs and telomeres were great.”
“That’s nice to know. Did she tell you her knee is hurting?”
The doctor’s eyes widened for a moment. “Yes, she did.”
“And what did you find?”
Dr. Allende took a deep breath. “There’s some arthritis there. It started developing a couple of years ago, as you know. We’ve treated it and it has stabilized.”
It was the answer Suella expected. “Now I’ve got a very important question for you.” For emphasis, she leaned forward and looked directly into the doctor’s eyes. “Can I see my daughter in private? I’d like to see my daughter in private.”
“Mrs. Worthy, I don’t know…”
“Doctor Allende, put yourself in my place,” Suella interrupted. “Your daughter’s locked away. Can’t videocam with her. Can’t speak with her on a phone. Can’t even message her. You see her three times a year if you’re lucky in some kind of controlled setup with guards arranged like Gestapo when all you want is time with your daughter.
Is that too much to ask?” Suella realized that her emotion got the better of her and that by the end of her little speech her voice was coming out more high and warbly than she wanted. Yet, Dr. Allende’s lips had parted, her eyes wide open.
“I can send for her, and you can talk to her in here,” the doctor said, softly.
“Would you be in the office, too?”
“Yes, I’m afraid so.”
“Is that the best you can do?”
“You know it is.”
Suella resolved that it was better for Dr. Allende to eavesdrop on a conversation instead of Gerald Knockwood. “Can you send for her, please?”
Dr. Allende left the room for a couple of minutes, and when she returned, Natalie entered the room along with her. “Hi mom,” she said. “All finished.”
Suella hugged her daughter, and all three women sat down. “So tell me more about David.”
Natalie shrugged, tapping one foot on the carpet. “He’s a friend of mine at school, and he’s a nice guy. I really like him.”
“Does he like the school as much as you do?”
“Yes, about the same. He said he was glad to get away.”
It surprised Suella that Natalie would voluntarily disclose something like that and she checked Dr. Allende’s reaction. The doctor had lowered her eyebrows, listening along with interest. “He was glad to get away, why?”
“Well, David wasn’t like me,” she said. “He was cloned from a son of his parents who died. And his parents always expected him to be exactly like the first David.”
“That’s so sad. In what ways was he different?”
The question stumped Natalie at first, as she paused to reflect and remember. “Oh, well the first David liked spaghetti and meatballs a lot. He could have it every meal if he wanted it. But the David I know, well he didn’t like it as much. His mother kept on cooking it for him, though. One day, David said ‘Why are we always having worms and golfballs?’ and his mother screamed and slapped him.”
“That’s terrible.”
“Yeah.”
Suella gathered her wits about her before she asked the next question, and took a deep breath. “Does David get to go home when he wants?”
“Mrs. Worthy, that’s none of your business.”
Suella raised her hands and said “Just having a conversation with my daughter, ma’am.”
Natalie glanced at Dr. Allende and quickly replied. “He can. But he likes to stay at school.”
Dr. Allende nodded, then tapped her desktop. “I think I’ll check to see if the gentlemen are ready for the ride back.”
Moments later, Suella and Natalie were back in the Magnavan, holding hands and talking quietly for the trip back to Waldheim. Suella decided that it was worth the trouble just to hug her daughter. In two more years, Natalie would turn eighteen and the center would no longer legally be able to hold her at Waldheim.
Suella wished she could put herself in a deep freeze until then.