Page 13
“Wow. ” That sounded pretty exciting. If Emily could know the future…she closed her mind to the question. There were too many dark places she didn’t want go.
“There are responsibilities that come with my gift. Do you know what responsibilities are?”
Emily nodded. “You have to do the right thing and you have to think it up even if no one tells you. Like having a pet. I’d have to feed it and stuff, even if Mom didn’t remind me. Or doing my homework without being re minded. ”
“Exactly. I have to be careful what I tell people. Some may make decisions based on our conversation and I don’t want them making a mistake. ”
Emily could see how that would be bad. “Do you get scared?”
“Not very often, but it’s happened. Also, I have to stay pure for my gift. ”
“Pure?”
Bev grinned. “It’s like staying clean, but for grown-ups. ” She leaned close. “Emily, if you could know one thing about your future, what would it be?”
Emily shrank back in her chair. “Nothing. I don’t want to know anything. ”
“Are you sure?”
She nodded so hard her hair slapped her cheeks. She didn’t want to know. What if her mom left the way her dad did? What if her dad didn’t love her anymore? What if she was left all alone with nowhere to go?
Her stomach got all tight and hard and she thought she might throw up.
Bev straightened and picked up her cards. “One thing I don’t need tarot to tell me is how special you are. I’m really enjoying having you with me. I’m afraid the summer is going to go by really fast and then you’ll be gone and I’ll miss you. I guess if I’m going to miss you a lot and I’ve just met you, then your mom must be having a hard time right now. She’s known you all her life. ”
Emily had wondered about that. “She said she would. ”
“Of course. You’re a part of her day. She’s missing you just like your dad missed you while he was apart from you. ”
Emily was less sure about that. “He never called or anything. ”
Bev nodded. “Sometimes that happens. And when they mess up, grown-ups feel very guilty, and then they don’t know what to do to make it right. Especially with kids. How much should we say? How much will you understand? But now that you’re with your dad, I know you can see the love in his eyes. I do. ”
Emily stared at her. “You do?”
“Uh-huh. Every time he walks into this house, his whole face lights up. He’s so bright, he could be a lamp. ”
Emily giggled at the thought of her dad with a lamp shade on his head. “You’re funny. ”
“Thank you. ” Bev held out her arms. “I need a hug. Is that all right?”
Emily grinned. “Sure. ” She stood and walked around the table, but as she got closer to Bev, something funny happened inside. Her chest got all sore and her face got hot and suddenly she wanted to cry.
Bev pulled her close and set her on her lap. “A nice big hug,” she said, wrapping her arms around Emily. “I think I need one at least once a day. ”
Emily tried to talk, but she couldn’t. She flung her arms around Bev’s neck and burst into tears.
“It’s all right,” Bev said, her voice low and gentle. “You have yourself a good cry. Some days we need that as much as a hug. ”
Emily didn’t know what was wrong. Why was she crying? Why did everything hurt so bad inside?
Bev continued to hold her, rubbing her back and kissing the top of her head.
“My brave little girl,” she murmured. “This has been hard for you. But you’re safe now. You’re safe with me and you’re safe with your dad. ”
Emily shook her head. “I’m not. ”
“I see. Because he’s mean?”
“No. ” She sniffed, then rubbed her cheek against the softness of Bev’s flowered dress. “Because he never came and found me. He was supposed to. He was supposed to find me. ”
“Of course he was. All dads are supposed to find their little girls. He broke the rules. ”
Emily raised her head and stared into Bev’s face. “He did. ”
“I know. Don’t you hate it when that happens?”
Emily didn’t know what to say. She’d expected Bev to tell her she was wrong. That she shouldn’t expect her dad to come find her.
“I was mad,” she admitted.
“I would be, too. You’re still mad, aren’t you?”
Emily opened her mouth, then closed it. Was she mad? Was that it? She nodded slowly.
“And even when your dad says he loves you, you don’t know if you can believe him. ”
Emily nodded again. Bev knew.
“When you’re mad at your dad it makes you scared, which makes you think about your mom. And you start to wonder if she’s even missing you at all. ”
Tears filled her eyes as she nodded, then she collapsed against Bev. “What if they both forget about me?”
“Sweetie, that’s not going to happen. How could any one forget about you? It’s only been a couple of days and I know I never could. But I understand what you feel. I understand. ”
They were the most precious words Emily had ever heard. She stayed in Bev’s arms for a long time. When she started to feel better, she raised her head again.
“Are you going to tell my dad what I said?”
Bev straightened and raised her eyebrows. “Me? Be tray a secret? Never! I’m shocked you’d even ask. Shocked and insulted. ”
Emily smiled. “You’re funny. ”
“That, too. Shocked, insulted and funny. ” She smoothed Emily’s bangs. “I won’t tell him what you said, but I will tell him he needs to keep working on making you feel safe. Just like I’m going to tell you that you need to open your heart enough to think about for giving him. If your dad wasn’t trying, then I’d agree with you about staying mad. But he is trying and he loves you so much. Wouldn’t it be sad to miss that be cause you keep turning your back on him?”
Emily wasn’t sure exactly what Bev meant, but she got enough to know Bev was telling her not to be mean. “I’m scared. What if he goes away again?”
“What if he doesn’t? Are you going to spend every day waiting for that?”
“I don’t know. ”
“You need to think about it. And you can always talk to me. Or Jill. ” She grinned. “Or even your dad. I’m not so sure about Elvis. I don’t think he gives very good ad vice. ”
Emily giggled. “He doesn’t talk. ”
“No, but he has opinions about everything. ” Bev squeezed her. “Better?”
Emily nodded, then hopped down. She felt good. The tightness was gone and she found herself looking forward to seeing her dad when he got home. She wanted to see if he really lit up like a lamp when he saw her.
“NEED A RIDE?” Mac asked when the meeting ended.
Jill picked up the large box containing plastic bags printed with “Los Lobos means fun” and several hundred sunscreen samples, along with the other freebies she was supposed to stuff inside, and sighed.
“Thanks. I don’t think I could walk home with all this. ” Her expression was an intriguing combination of amusement and frustration.
He grabbed the second box of supplies and led the way outside. “Why didn’t you refuse when Pam volunteered you?”
“I don’t know. I was caught off guard. Everyone else was doing something for the celebration and I felt guilty because I don’t even want to be here. I can’t explain it. ”
“Maybe it’s best if you don’t try. ”
She laughed as they stepped out into the night. “If I’m going to keep getting suckered into jobs like this, I’m going to have to do something about getting transportation. Either give up on trying to get Lyle’s car dented or get a car of my own. But I really liked the idea of revenge. It’s a big part of my new five-year plan. ”
He unlocked his truck and opened the b
ack hatch. After loading in his box, he took hers. “I don’t want to hear about your revenge. ”
“Don’t be a stick-in-the-mud. I won’t do anything illegal. ”
“That’s how it starts. Then things get out of hand. ”
“Ha. ” She slid into the passenger seat. “I would like to take this moment to point out that of the two of us, you’re the only one who has been arrested for stealing a car. ”
“That was a long time ago. ” Another lifetime ago. He’d been young and stupid and out for the thrill. In some ways, getting arrested had been the best thing that had happened to him—it had turned his life around.
He started the engine and pulled away from the curb. Jill leaned back in her seat.
“Aunt Bev is going to be so happy that I volunteered,” she said. “Maybe I can get her to stuff the bags for me. ”
“You wouldn’t do that. ”
Jill glanced at him and grinned. Her long dark hair swayed as she moved. “You’re right, but I will take the boxes into work tomorrow and see if I can talk Tina into it. She doesn’t do much work, anyway. This would be a change for her. ”
“And for a good cause. ”
He navigated the quiet streets. He liked seeing the warm glow of lights behind drapes and the bikes left scattered on lawns. This was his town, his responsibility. He wanted to do right by the people. Jill, on the other hand, counted the days until her escape. If she hadn’t had a run-in with Lyle, she wouldn’t be here at all.
“So if your soon-to-be ex is so horrible, why did you marry him?” he asked.
Jill shook her head. “Good question. I plead youth and ignorance. Maybe bad timing. We met in law school. Lyle was funny and nice and good-looking enough to catch my attention but not so good-looking that I had to worry he’d have a busload of women following him everywhere. Boy, was I wrong about that. ”
“Did he cheat on you before this last time?”
“Not that I know about. I’m willing to forgive some things, but not that. It’s just too much of a betrayal. No, at first things were good. We were in a study group. He wasn’t the smartest one there, but he did okay. ”
Mac turned onto their street. “Let me guess. You were the smartest one there. ”
She batted her eyes at him. “A lady never studies and tells. ”
“Figures. So you got him through law school and then what?”
Jill frowned. “You know, I was about to say I didn’t get him through law school, but I think you might be right. I helped him with his homework and papers and we studied together for tests. My God, I never got that before. ”
He pulled in front of her house. “It’s okay that you helped him. ”
“It’s crazy. What was I thinking?” She unfastened her seat belt and angled toward him. “I got him his job, too. When I graduated first in our class, I had a ton of offers. There were a couple of law firms that really caught my attention, including the one I went with in San Francisco. Lyle wasn’t getting many offers and he used to talk about how sad it was going to be for us to be apart. By then we were dating. ”
Sleeping together, Mac thought, but he kept that to himself. Lyle had probably been bright enough not to be so drunk the first time he saw Jill naked that he threw up. Mac nearly groaned when he remembered what she’d told him. Talk about bad timing.
“He went on about us getting married,” she continued. “About how great it would be. On my last interview, I told the senior partners I wanted them to hire Lyle, as well. ”
She grimaced. “A pretty ballsy move, but I was young, I thought I was in love. They agreed, and he got the job. Then he got me fired. ”