Crystal cut the car engine and stared out the windshield into country darkness, so much blacker than that in town. In his tone, she heard a lot of things she didn’t wish to acknowledge. If Tanner felt physically attracted to her, she was fine with it. But she detected something more in his voice, a growing affection for her. And she wasn’t okay with that. He was a great guy, possibly one of the nicest she’d ever met. He’d also lost his wife, had endured more than his fair share of pain, and was trying to raise two kids alone. The last thing he needed was for a woman to toy with his feelings.
“Tanner, there’s something you should know about me.”
“I’m all ears.”
That made her smile again, and she wondered if she was nuts for thinking about putting a halt to this before it even began. “I, um—I can’t think how to put this. I just think you should know that I’m not looking for a permanent relationship.”
He chuckled. “Well, that’s good to know. I’m not sure I’m looking for one, either. Probably not, if I’m smart. I’ve got young kids. Bringing a woman into the picture might cause problems. Maybe not. But the possibility shouldn’t be ignored.”
She released a taut breath. “So we’re on the same page.”
“For now. If I start to feel differently, I’ll let you know. I just enjoy your company. I find you attractive. I’d like to see where that takes us.”
That sounded safe. Harmless. As long as he walked into it with his eyes wide-open, he couldn’t get hurt, and she didn’t have to feel as if she were treading on eggshells around him. “I’m good with that.”
“I remember you saying that the new electronic collar for Rip is due in tomorrow. That got me thinking. If I stop by your salon with it first thing in the morning, you could charge the collar all day and be ready for the trial run when you get home. I could come by. I’d like to be there to see how it works on him.”
Crystal grinned. “You make me smile, Tanner Richards. I thought you were going to ask me out again, and instead we’re making a dog-watching date.”
He chuckled. “Hey, at least it’ll be different.”
“True. And undoubtedly exciting. Rip’s middle name is Unpredictable. Should I pick up some takeout so we can make it another dinner date?”
He sighed. “I’d love that, but I won’t have enough time. You told me something I need to know about you. One thing you need to know about me is my life is scheduled mostly around my kids and my responsibility to them.”
“I understand. Monday is a school night.”
“Yeah, and nearly every moment has to be structured in order to get them bathed and into bed for a good rest. I wish I had more free time, but that isn’t my reality.”
“I’m good with that. I go to bed early on weeknights, too.”
* * *
When Crystal got home, Rip was still gone. She checked the time and decided she had to find some balance in her relationship with the dog. She’d just driven around for over three hours looking for him. If something happened to him, she’d be able to look Tuck straight in the eye and say she’d done everything possible to keep him safe. She would also feel confident of that in her heart. It was after ten. She had to be up at five. Even now she wouldn’t get her recommended eight hours.
No hot bath. No lounging. No reading or television. She stripped off, dropped a silky camisole over her head, and crawled into bed. Even with No Name hogging part of her pillow, she fell asleep almost the instant she closed her eyes.
Then a sound woke her up. Rip was home and scratching at the door. Glancing at the digital clock on her nightstand, she saw that it was once again three in the morning. She stumbled through the dark house, caught her little toe on a dining chair, and hopped around on one foot grunting until the pain subsided a little. Then she limped to the door. Flipping on the porch light, she opened the portal and glared down at her grandfather’s dog. He wore what she’d come to think of as his exhausted grin, his lips parted, his tongue lolling out one side and dripping drool, and his eyes looking slightly unfocused.
“Where have you been?” she asked.
Rip tripped on the threshold, caught his balance, and staggered right past her to his bed, where he did a half roll in midair to land on his back atop the cushion.
“It’s three in the morning, Rip! Three. I feel like I’m married to a drunk who never comes home until the bars close. Only, guess what. I can’t divorce you.”
Crystal hoped she could get back to sleep. She turned off the porch light, hobbled back to her room, and crawled under the covers. She catnapped until her alarm went off at five, and she felt exhausted when she got up to start the day.
* * *
How many times could a person explain how she had sprained or broken her little toe? Crystal hadn’t been able to stuff her right foot into a pair of heels that morning. Instead she’d chosen an old pair of shoes made of soft leather with well-cushioned soles. Even so, she still limped, and everyone noticed.
“Oh, how did you hurt your foot?” Or “Wow, that’s quite a limp you’ve got. What happened?” Each time Crystal replied, she vowed never to walk through the house again without turning on lights.
By midmorning she had almost given up on Tanner arriving with Rip’s new collar. It felt strange to be watching for him. Every time she glimpsed a black vehicle through the shop windows, her heart leaped. It took her back in time to her high school years when she’d crushed on a boy and walked the halls during lunch hour, hoping to see him. Only, she was no longer a teenager, and it was crazy to feel this way about a guy. Unfortunately, her brain didn’t seem to be listening.
At a quarter after ten, she saw the Courier Express van pull over at the curb in front of the salon. When Tanner emerged carrying a small package, he looked so good that her knees felt weak.
“Be still, my heart. He’s new on this route,” Nadine said. “Nice step up from Brian. Eye candy.”
“Oh, he is yummy,” someone else said.
Crystal wanted to say, “No, he’s mine,” but she had no claim on Tanner Richards. Women could flirt with him, and if he wanted to, he could flirt back. That was the way she wanted it. Right? So why did she feel possessive of him?
He flashed that fabulous grin as he opened the door. “Delivery for Crystal Malloy.”
She hobbled over to take the package. Bending his head slightly, he asked, “What happened to your foot?”
“Rip finally came home,” she told him, and then repeated the response she’d now memorized.
Tanner winced. “Maybe you should get the toe X-rayed.”
Crystal didn’t think there was a lot to be done for a sprained or broken toe. “See you around six?” she asked.
He nodded. “I’ll be looking forward to it.”
* * *
Crystal half expected Rip to be away gallivanting again and be a no-show for his own collar party, but when she parked in front of the house that evening, she saw the dog sitting beside Tanner on the front steps. It reminded her of the day Tanner had waited in almost the same spot, wearing only his belt, boots, and puppy boxers. This time, he was smiling, though. And dressed.
As she climbed from her car, she smoothed her blouse and brushed at her slacks, wanting to look her best. Only why? It was a question she couldn’t answer. Yes, she liked men. And, yes, she enjoyed sex. Well, with the right person, she did. But she wasn’t in the market for anything more. If Tanner liked what he saw, fine. If he didn’t, she’d be okay with that, too. Only for reasons beyond her, she wasn’t sure she really would be okay if he decided he wasn’t interested in her. Something within her had altered. She’d finally met a guy who made her wish she had more to offer than a fling.
“I see that frown,” he called. “Did you forget I’d be here?”
Crystal made a conscious effort to stop scowling. “No. Long day. I’m glad you came. You can celebrate with me when R
ip finally meets his match.”
“You’re not limping. The toe must be better.”
“Still tender, but better, yes.”
Crystal gave the dog a treat as she entered the yard. Not so long ago, she’d often forgotten and been pinched for the infraction. Now giving Rip biscuits had become second nature. She held up the box that Tanner had delivered that morning. “I got the collar charged, so it’s ready to go. Let me go get it paired with the controller. I’ll be right back.”
“Mind if I come along?”
“No, not at all.”
As they circled the house and crossed the lawn, their arms brushed, and Crystal felt that jolt of awareness again. His blue gaze flicked toward her and arced like the deep aqua at the base of a blowtorch. She’d never felt this way with anyone. And judging by his startled expression, she was pretty sure he hadn’t, either, at least not recently. Even Rip seemed to notice. Following them from a few paces back, he braced his front feet in the grass and barked.
Tanner glanced at the dog. Then he came to a halt. “Okay, I know I should let it pass, but I’ve got to ask if you felt that.”
Crystal’s throat went tight, and bubbles of sensation bounced just above the V of her collarbone like bingo balls in a blowing machine. Her whole body tingled. Deep in the core of her, she ached with yearning. If her foot still ached, she couldn’t feel it.
“I— Yes,” she managed.
“Good.” He thrust his large, burnished fingers through his honey-streaked brown hair and huffed as if he’d been holding his breath. “I think.”
And then for no reason at all they both began to laugh. In an odd way it was cathartic. When their mirth abated, the tension between them had eased.
“Collar,” he reminded her.
Crystal lifted her hand to stare at the circle of woven nylon with a black box attached. She’d forgotten she held it, even forgotten why they had walked out here. Turning toward the pump house, she said, “It’ll only take a moment to pair it with the controller.”
He stood just outside the shed. The control box and the collar beeped as they matched signals. She felt Tanner’s presence behind her. She couldn’t help but think that their bodies had just undergone a human version of pairing. The thought unnerved her. Most of her life she’d prided herself on her self-control. Allowing herself to be attracted to a man had been a conscious decision, and now it suddenly wasn’t. Did Tanner feel as rattled as she did?
As she left the shed, he took the collar from her. Their fingertips touched, and she felt another zing of sensation. His gaze met hers, and she knew he’d felt it, too. Only this time he said nothing.
“Come here, Rip.” He bent over to adjust the size of the nylon band to fit the dog’s neck. Then he snapped the clasp. “There. Ready for showtime.”
Studiously trying not to look at each other, they both stared at Rip. The blue heeler seemed to understand he was supposed to do something, but he clearly didn’t know what.
“Okay. We should ignore him,” Tanner suggested. “He knows something’s up.”
Crystal nodded in agreement, but she didn’t know if she could behave normally. Her physical reaction to Tanner had scrambled her nerves. Her heart was pounding, and her skin still tingled. Nothing about this was business as usual for her. She wasn’t sure she liked it.
They walked toward the front of the house, this time keeping a distance between them. Rip seemed relieved. He dashed around their moving legs, cutting a figure eight. Then he got too close to the fence and yelped.
Crystal clenched her hands into fists. “That hurt him. I hate this.”
“It’s only a little zap. Don’t be too hard on yourself.”
In unison they turned to watch the dog race toward the pond. Leaping from the bank, Rip went airborne for an instant and then cut the water’s surface with a huge splash.
“He’s trying to drown it,” Tanner observed. “I hope you got a good one.”
Crystal hoped so, too. She’d paid nearly three hundred, but high cost didn’t always mean fine quality. “We’ll see.”
Face dripping water, Rip surfaced and grinned at her. She understood that look. The dog thought he’d won again. Only this time when he left the pond and ran close to the fence, he yelped, circled away, and stopped in his tracks, his expression bewildered. Then it turned calculating.
“He’s plotting,” she said. “I can see the wheels in his brain turning.”
Tanner folded his arms. “This is when we’ll see if you got a collar with strong enough correction.”
Rip made a U-turn and ran toward the fence. He yelped when he entered the signal zone, but this time instead of racing away, he kept going, leaped up to hook his paws through the chain links, and started to climb, yipping intermittently until he found purchase on the top crossbar. He sat there for a moment.
“The safety just kicked in,” Tanner said. “The signal isn’t strong enough. Not enough to discourage him, anyway. He knows that the collars stop correcting him in thirty seconds. It’s a safety feature in case a dog gets trapped in a signal zone.”
Crystal watched as her grandfather’s dog leaped to the ground on the other side of the chain-link fence. She turned to Tanner. “Dogs have no concept of time. Rip doesn’t know the difference between thirty seconds and eight hours.”
“True. But he’s learned that the collar cuts off and he can withstand the correction until it does. It’s not about him comprehending time the same way we do. It’s about him knowing that he can outlast the collar.”
Crystal forgot all about her physical attraction to Tanner. As she watched Rip tear toward an adjacent field and disappear into tall grass, she wanted to scream. “Now what?” She sent the question skyward. She didn’t expect Tanner to answer it. “He’s got to be kept home. He’s making me miss work, plus he’s disappearing at night and not coming back until three in the morning. I’m losing sleep! And I can’t afford to buy any more collars that don’t work.”
He rested his hands on his hips. “I know you don’t want to do it, but like I said before, a collar for a much bigger dog may be the only solution.”
“That would be cruel.”
“Yeah, maybe. You going after him?”
“It’s pointless. He hides. I can never find him.”
“I guess you have to weigh things out and decide what’s best for Rip. You could drive a spike in the ground and chain him.”
“I hate seeing dogs chained. They get tangled. Can’t reach their water. That’s cruel, too.”
They stood in silence for a moment. Then he said, “I wish this collar had been a success.”
She nodded. “Thanks for the moral support.”
“I’d love to stay longer, but Michael’s at practice. I’d like to catch the end of it if I can. Watch him throw. Give him some pointers.”
“I understand. It’s important for you to be there.”
He strode toward the gate. Even as upset as she was about Rip being gone again, she admired the masculine grace of his movements. At the door of the van, he sent her a long look. “Weigh your options. Maybe discuss it with Tuck and get his opinion. He doesn’t want Rip running at large. It’s dangerous.”
Crystal knew that. When Rip was gone at night, she could barely sleep for worrying about all the horrible things that might happen to him.
“Bye, Tanner.”
He raised a hand, climbed into the vehicle, and drove away.
* * *
Instead of searching for Rip again, Crystal decided to visit Tuck and have a heart-to-heart with him. Nobody understood Rip better. Maybe he’d share some ideas with her about how to keep the blue heeler at home.
When Crystal reached the center, Tuck wasn’t in his apartment. She looked for him in the community areas but didn’t see him. He wasn’t out back fishing, either. This was a first. Now both Rip and her g
randfather were missing. She walked to the front desk, where Marsha sat reading a book. Light from the setting sun slanted in through the dining hall windows to shimmer on her red hair.
“Do you know where Tuck is?”
Marsha lifted her gaze. “If I tell you where he is, then Patricia will know that I know, and I’m not supposed to know.” She tilted her head. “Did that make any sense?” She sighed. “If I pretend not to notice, then I don’t have to tell on him. Understand? And I really, really don’t want to tell on him.”
Crystal wondered what on earth Tuck was doing wrong now. “Okay. Tell me where he is, and I’ll never tell anyone that you told.” She wasn’t sure if that string of words made any more sense than Marsha’s had. “I really need to talk to him.”
Barely above a whisper, Marsha said, “He’s with his girlfriend.”
“His what?”
Marsha leaned closer. “His friend Essie. I think they’ve got a thing going.”
Crystal wasn’t excited about her grandfather engaging in an end-of-life romance, but she wasn’t against it, either. “Don’t tell me that’s against the rules, too.”
With a sigh, Marsha said, “’Fraid so.”
“I don’t get it. If they like each other, what’s the problem?”
“Ask Patricia. She has it in her brain that the elderly are incapable of making wise choices for themselves.”
Crystal couldn’t believe this. “But, Marsha, Oregon law protects their right to have visitors of their choosing. What they do behind closed doors is nobody’s business but theirs.”
“She can’t stop them from visiting each other, but she’ll blow a gasket if there’s physical intimacy.”
“Do you honestly think Tuck can still—well, you know, do that?”
Marsha rolled a pen back and forth under the flat of her hand. “Maybe. I don’t know. My husband couldn’t at fifty-nine without ED medication. But every man may be different.”
Crystal suddenly wanted a drink. Make that a double. “What’s Essie’s apartment number?”
The older woman cleared her throat. “Sixty-nine. Sorry. I know it’s a bad omen.”