This War
By
Takianna
* * * * *
PUBLISHED BY:
Star Wars Fanbase Publications
Copyright 2013 by Takianna
*****
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The Beginning
His eye lids fluttered. Almost imperceptible to those who wouldn't know what it meant. Not sleeping, just merely taking in the sounds and feelings around him. Clones were hard to figure out. The same faces staring at you continuously, but they were so different in the force. They felt like the individuals they were. Something which was so hard to perceive by looking at them. Anakin's eye lids fluttered again as he concentrated harder in the force. Calling on it to calm him and restore his energy.
Rex was close, Anakin felt him standing 20 paces away. He could tell his helmet was tucked under his arm and he was watching diligently. Rex barely left Anakin's side these days. Always there to take orders or to give his opinion on the next battle. He was a good friend, if that is what you could call him. War sometimes made strange partnerships of those who were thrown into it not of their choice, but the choice of someone who now sat on Coruscant wondering what was going on out here.
Anakin inhaled deeply. The air smelled of war. Here in the hanger bay, it's where he felt most at home. The solvents and exhaust had little to no effect on him. Many people found the smells too much. Anakin thought it smelled almost as good as Padme did.
"Captain Rex," Anakin called out opening his eyes and uncrossing his legs. He watched as the clone stalked towards him. He had been right, his helmet was tucked neatly under his arm. "Do you have a report?"
Rex stopped short and saluted Anakin. It was merely procedure. The only time Rex saluted was when they were on the ship. Always the picture of military procedure when the other clones were looking on. A role model of sorts. He never saluted when they were in the heat of battle though. Too easy to pick out the generals, Rex always said. Anakin smiled. Like he wasn't hard to pick out with a lightsaber in his hand, cutting down everyone in his path.
"There are several groups of men who will be rejoining the fleet today," Rex reported in his staccato military voice. "Shuttles are docking now, sir."
"Thank you Rex," Anakin said. His mind was elsewhere. Somewhere far away."Ahsoka?"
Rex smiled. He had such a soft spot for Anakin's little padawan. "She is resting," he finally said with a chuckle. "She's a little pistol."
Anakin nodded distractedly. "That she is," he said. "Anything else Captain?"
"No sir," Rex said in crisp military precision. Once again the consummate soldier. "I was wondering if you would like to join myself and some of the 501st for dinner?"
Anakin wasn't surprised. He loved his men. They were the workhorses of this war. He loved to be around them. Hear what it was like to live a normal life. Well, if you could call the clones' life normal. "I would love to," Anakin said and they fell into stride together. "General Kenobi joining us?"
Rex shook his head. "Seems he has taken to eating with Cody and his men," Rex said finally.
Anakin smiled to himself. Obi-wan was glad to be with someone besides Anakin for once. He could regale the clones in Cody's group with tales from when he was a young jedi. Stories Anakin had heard a million times, but wouldn't ever get tired of. Obi-wan had saved Padme and been one of the best masters in the temple. Anakin was thankful for those things.
"General," Rex said getting Anakin's attention again. It seemed Anakin was always lost in thought these days. War did strange things to the mind sometimes.
"Sorry," Anakin said rubbing his chin thoughtfully. "I'm just in many different places right now."
"Should we ask padawan Tano to join us?" Rex repeated the question. He wasn't angry. The clones knew the pressure of war and they also knew the pressure the jedi were under. There weren't many of them to lead the clones. They were inexperienced, to say the least, in leading warriors. Many of the commanders and captains were patient with the jedi. More patient than Anakin could be at times.
"I'll comm her," Anakin said and reached for his comm. He activated Ahsoka's code and waited for her to answer.
"Yes master," her voice came through the small cylinder.
"Would you like to join me and some of the 501st for dinner?" Anakin asked her.
"I will meet you in the galley," Ashoka said and then Anakin heard the click of the transmission ending.
He continued along with Rex to the galley. There a huge group of clones, helmets off, were eating. It was like seeing mirror after mirror repeating the same face, but feeling all the individuals who were there. It was a good thing he had learned long ago not to trust his eyes. Otherwise he would be lost in this sea of humanity.
When he stepped into the doorway, followed closely by Rex, the entire group stood at attention. He felt embarrassed. "At ease," he said quickly and turned to look at Rex. "Do they really have to do that?" he asked under his breath. "I mean every time I enter a room?"
"Yes, sir," Rex said emphasizing the sir with a wry smile. Anakin rolled his eyes and continued to the chow line.
War food wasn't good. Everything was synthesized and proteins added. It was sometimes too bland to even choke down. "I'll take the nerf steak," Anakin said to the droid who was serving. He wasn't even hungry. There were things he could do without and eating was one of them.
"Hello master," Anakin heard the female voice from behind him. He turned and Ahsoka smiled up at him.
"Snips," Anakin said pushing his tray along to where the desserts were. They were almost cleaned out. Clones did have a sweet tooth. He looked over some sort of gelatinous material with fruit floating inside, put the plate down and continued on to get a drink. "Stimcaf please," Anakin said to the droid serving the drinks. He'd been living on the stuff since they had left Coruscant.
"Everything okay Master?" Ahsoka asked as she followed in line. She picked up several fruits and vegetables to eat. Anakin didn't see how she continued to thrive eating the kind of stuff she ate. He hardly ever saw her eat anything besides vegetables. And these weren't the best. He needed a good meal. Something which was filling. It took all his strength to fight and use the force. All of his strength to make sure he returned home to her. All his strength to make sure his men returned from battle. It seemed like he was always using all of his strength and not for himself.
"I've got a lot on my mind,' Anakin said truthfully. He didn't feel as though he could burden anyone else with his troubles. He couldn't even be truthful with those around him. It was hard to block out those he loved from knowing about his one true love. His secret life. He shook his head and smiled at Ahsoka. "Still have to make an appearance to keep up morale."
Ahsoka nodded her head. She was taking in so many things he said. She was picking apart every sentence he said, looking for the meaning in it. Anakin didn't think there was that much meaning in what he said.
He picked up his tray and headed to the middle of the table where there was enough room to squeeze in between a couple of the clones. The clones moved aside to give him more room. Anakin sighed and dug into his meal. He pushed the pieces of steak around on his plate, but didn't really feel like eating anything.
"You okay sir?" the clone next to him asked. Anakin snapped back to where he was and gave the clone a reassuring smile.
"I'm fine," Anakin said and finally put one of the pieces of steak in his mouth. He chewed thoughtfully. Captain Rex pushed aside the two clones sitting across from Anakin and sat down.
Rex was always watching after Anakin. He wouldn't be surprised if Rex stood outside his door when he was sleeping, or what passed for sleep.
"You need shore leave," Rex commented and dug into his meal. Anakin had never seen a clone who wasn't hungry. Rex ate as much as two grown men and sometimes Anakin caught him snacking later in the afternoon, before dinner. Possibly a side effect of rapid aging.
"I need a lot of things," Anakin said after he swallowed his steak piece. "Shore leave would be nice, but unless you know where I can find a shore to leave on, quit telling me to take it."
Rex laughed. "There are many things you can do for shore leave that don't involve leaving the ship," he finally said.
Anakin looked at Rex and Rex winked. "So," Anakin said. "Do you have ideas of what I can do to get my mind off of this war?"
"Nothing a little drinking and shouting couldn't cure," Rex said. It was known far and wide that like their Mandalorian brothers, the clones could 'tie one on' with the best of them. It didn't happen very often. When it did, it was the stuff of legend around the fleet.
Anakin remembered the last time he had found Rex, slumped in a hallway on the cruiser. He wasn't wearing anything but his helmet. A smile spread over Anakin's face.
"What?" Rex asked. He had a casual tone with Anakin now. As though