Page 20
Author: Molly McAdams
“I’m fine, I just wanted to be alone. ”
I snorted. “Well, I’ll be gone in a few minutes. I just need to grab a few things. How’s the uh—how’s the tattoo?”
“Beautiful. Can we talk about that night?”
Uh. No. I turned and headed for the stairs, “There’s nothing to talk about. ”
“Yes there is; you completely shut down, and you’ve been avoiding me ever since!”
I forced myself to keep walking even though I knew she was following me. “I’m not avoiding you; I just have nothing to say. ”
“Why are you treating me like this? What did I do?”
Dated my best friend, for starters. “Nothing!”
“So this is what you do then? You make girls feel like they’re special for a few days, then treat them like they’re nothing?”
Oh, hell no. I turned, and she had to stop quickly so she wouldn’t run into me, “You’re really gonna put this on me? One minute you’re kissing me, the next you’re talking to your boyfriend and telling him you love him!”
“What did you want me to do? Not answer it?”
Yeah, that’s exactly what I wanted you to do. She was looking at me like I’d lost it, and I realized there was no way for her to see my side since, clearly, I meant next to nothing to her, “It doesn’t even matter, Harper, so drop it. ”
“It does to me! I’m so tired of this roller coaster with you. I never know which Chase I’m going to meet up with that day. Is it going to be the cold Chase or the funny and caring Chase? Will it be the one who’s with four girls in one night, or the one that tells me how beautiful I am, does amazingly sweet things for me, and notices stuff about me that no one else does?”
You. Are. Shitting me. She thinks I’m the bipolar one? And does she still not see how I’ve changed everything for her?
“You’re all over the place, I don’t know how to act around you, I don’t know what you want!”
“I want you! All I’ve ever wanted is you. ”
“Then why are you trying to hurt me again?”
“Because it’s easier that way,” I answered honestly, “You’re with Brandon. Do you know what it’s like watching you with him? Wanting you so bad, but knowing he’s who you should be with?”
“But what if I want you?”
No, no. No more games. “Harper, don’t. ”
“I’m so in love with Brandon, but I can’t help what I feel for you, and I know you know what I’m talking about. Whatever this is between us . . . it’s been there since we met. It’s like I can’t get enough of you, but all you do is push me away. It’s all you’ve ever done!”
“Because I’m not what you need, Harper!”
“Then why did you kiss me, Chase? You knew it would change everything, and it did. So tell me, why did you do it?”
Such a frustrating girl! Does she really want to do this now? After every back-and-forth game we’ve played over the last four and a half months? I closed the small distance between us as I spoke—half of me yelling to just leave, the other half wanting nothing more than to take her in my arms. “I needed to. You’re all I can think about, and it drives me crazy! I would have given anything for that kiss, and I knew I wouldn’t get that chance again, so I had to. I had to know if you felt something, too. ”
She threw out her arms and let out an exasperated huff. “Was that not obvious? Is it not obvious that I’m in love with you?”
I didn’t waste time crushing my mouth to hers. I’d waited so long to hear those words come from her. She moaned, and her body melted into mine, her legs going weak. I grabbed behind her thighs and wrapped her legs around my waist as I pushed her against the wall in an attempt to get our bodies closer together. The kiss deepened, and I begged her to say it again.
“Chase,” she whispered against my lips before grabbing my face to look into my eyes, “I love you. ”
My heart was pounding against my chest. Months of wondering and waiting, and it was finally out there. She pressed her lips firmly to mine, and I growled against her mouth, “God, Harper I love you, too, so much. ”
I pushed away from the wall, and keeping her legs around my waist, walked us into my room and lowered us onto my bed. Her hands left my hair and started pulling at my shirt. A soft sound of frustration sounded from the back of her throat, and I pulled away from her long enough to grab the back of the collar to pull my shirt off and throw it to the ground. Harper sat up slightly, and our mouths slammed together before I pressed her against the mattress again. Her hands ran over my bare chest and stomach, and all I could think about was everything I’d wanted to do to her while I’d been giving her the tattoo. Leaning back long enough to give me room to take her shirt off, I threw it to the floor as well and kissed her soft lips once more before making a line of kisses down to the orange lilies wrapping around her hip.
Harper sucked in a soft gasp when I gently bit down on her hip, and I smiled against her skin as I took off the skintight black workout pants she was wearing and tossed them aside as well. Add those to one more thing I didn’t want her wearing around anyone but me. I made another trail up her stomach and sucked on a hardened nipple through her bra before pressing my body against hers, her legs already wrapping around my back.
“I want you. ”
My head fell into the crook of her neck, and I groaned—as if everything else didn’t already show how much I wanted her as well, the painfully hard erection I was currently sporting was making it that much more obvious. I bit softly on her collarbone as I tried to make myself stop before this went any further. “I don’t have any condoms here, Princess. ”
“I don’t care. ”
I laughed. God, this girl will be the death of me. “Don’t say stuff like that, I’m only so strong. ”
She grabbed at the button on my jeans, and her shaky, fumbling hands had me thinking Breanna was still right about my Princess. I grabbed her hands and pulled them away, just before she confirmed those thoughts. “Please, Chase, I don’t want to wait any longer. I want you to be my first. ”
I leaned away from her and rested on my knees. “I can’t. ”
Her eyes went wide with hurt. “You don’t want me?”
“Of course I do!” God, can’t she see that?
“I don’t—I don’t understand. ” Her stormy gray eyes bounced back and forth between mine for a few moments before they filled with an understanding, and her cheeks darkened. “It’s because I’m a virgin. ”
Shit, she has this so wrong. “Not in the way you’re thinking. Trust me, I want to make you mine. ”
She cupped my face and pulled me down to her as she whispered, “Then please. ”
“Princess, you can’t want it to be me. With what I’ve done . . . I don’t deserve to be given something like that. ”
“It’s yours. I’m tired of ignoring what I feel for you and denying myself what I want. ”
Her eyes fell down to stare at my chest, and I watched as they slowly looked back up to mine. I waited to see if there was any indecision in them like the days before. But there was only complete trust. “You’re sure, Harper?”
“I want you. All of you. ”
I pressed my lips softly to hers again and stretched my body on top of hers as our kisses slowed, and her shaky hands reached for the top of my jeans again. Resting on my forearms, I took my weight off her so she could undo the button and zipper and slowly push them and my boxer briefs down. I helped kick them the rest of the way off and pulled her up to reach behind her and find the clasp for her bra. Once that and her underwear were on the floor with the rest of the clothes, I took my time studying every inch of her, learning what made her moan and her eyelids flutter shut, and memorizing every noise she made when I’d suck on her breast or trail my fingers against her heat.
Her heavy breathing cut off quickly, and her body locked up when I finally pushed inside of h
er, and I would give anything to have taken away her pain as a short, pained cry burst from her chest. But what she was giving me meant the damn world. When her body relaxed, we began to move against each other again, our mouths finding each other’s desperately, as I slowly made love to my princess. I held both of her hands in one of mine above her head on the pillow and whispered in her ear that I loved her as she came again just moments before I followed. I collapsed onto the bed, rolling so she was in my arms, and we were on our sides as our breathing calmed and we continued to kiss softly and pull each other closer.
Not more than five minutes later, Harper fell asleep wrapped up in my arms. I pulled the covers over us before pressing my lips to her forehead and vowing to love, and take care of her, forever.
THE SOFT SCENT of vanilla registered in my mind at the same moment I felt the tips of Harper’s fingers trailing up my arms and over my shoulders. I cracked open my eyes to see her mess of hair covering my pillow and her shoulder, and I couldn’t help but smile. Waking up to her in my arms was perfect, and though I wished I could have watched her sleep . . . watching as her stormy eyes roamed over my tattoos was just as good.
“Feels good. ”
Her eyes flashed up to mine, and she grinned softly before looking back down to my shoulder. “I’ve wanted to do this since that first night in your bed. ”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Well, you were a little intimidating, and plus, you not so subtly let me know I wasn’t the kind of girl you would ever be with. ”
Uh, fuck that. All I remembered was trying to scare her off and her looking at me like I disgusted her. “What did I say?”
“I don’t remember exactly, you were just freaking out because you thought you’d let a girl stay over and proceeded to tell me you didn’t let girls you would screw stay with you. ” She paused and chewed on her bottom lip for a moment before looking back up to me, and softly asking, “Speaking of . . . is it okay that I’m here?”