He reached out and pulled the straps down my shoulders and let my bra fall to the ground. My nipples pebbled under his stare.
As his eyes traveled over me, he whispered, "You take my breath away."
Blood was pumping through my core so powerfully, that I thought I might be able to come just from the fierce flow of it alone. I had never been this turned on, even all those years ago, with this same man. Maybe it was because it had been so long, but I thought a more likely explanation was that he was mine this time. We hadn't discussed it specifically, but I knew it was true. He was mine and I was his. That knowledge was a heady aphrodisiac.
We both reached down simultaneously and removed our bottoms, each watching the other. His cock sprang free and at the sight of it, I felt a release of hot moisture in my core.
I stood up straight and drank in his powerful body. I shivered, not with cold, but with arousal, but Carson took one towel and quickly wrapped it around his narrow hips and then took the other towel and wrapped it around me, picking me up in his arms, and then using one hand to unlock and open the back door.
The blast of cold, snowy air hit us and I wrapped my arms around him, putting my face in the crook of his neck, breathing him in and moaning at the scent of his skin right against my face, that individual smell that I would recognize until the day I died. If I was put in a dark room with one hundred other men, I could locate him by scent alone. That scent belonged to me.
I couldn't help darting my tongue out to taste him there. He tasted slightly salty and I relished it on my tongue. I wanted to taste him everywhere.
I heard a small growl come from his throat and a slight tremor move through his body as he walked to the hot tub a few feet away.
He set me down next to it and as I climbed in the hot, steamy water, he placed our towels underneath a bench behind him and pressed a button to turn on the jets.
As I sunk down into the water with a sigh, Carson climbed in and moved right next to me.
My eyes fell closed and I moaned out at the delicious feel of the hot water swirling around me, warming me completely. I let every muscle in my body relax, letting the stress and emotional build-up release from my tense body. After a few minutes, I grew so hot that I felt perspiration break out on my forehead. The desire that had been pulsing through my body a few minutes ago was still there, but it had taken a backseat momentarily.
I looked over at Carson and he was smiling over at me. "I missed that," he whispered.
"What?" I murmured.
"The look of pleasure on your face," he said, smiling softly.
I smiled a slight smile back and really studied his face for the first time since he had come back into my life. Those deep hazel eyes with the long, dark lashes, always watching, observing, taking in everything around him, his straight nose and those full lips that I constantly wanted somewhere on my body. I reached out my finger and traced his strong jaw, a day or two worth of scruff making it rough beneath my touch, and then used my thumb to trace his lips, right before I leaned over and kissed him gently. He wrapped a hand around the back of my neck and pulled me closer to him, slanting his lips over mine.
Snow was falling gently around us, the sun now almost entirely up in the sky, creating a warm glow to the quiet morning.
We kissed slowly for a few minutes, our tongues meeting and dueling gently, but then he moaned deeply into my mouth and thrust his tongue deeper, causing sparks to re-ignite and shoot to my core. Oh God, the taste of him. How had I lived without it all these years?
I pressed my breasts against his chest and rolled around on top of him so that I was straddling him, his erection pressing into my belly beneath the water. I slid my wet body against his, glorying in the feel of my slick skin gliding against his.
Our kisses went deep and wild until we were both panting into each other's mouths. My body was relaxed, yet filled with electricity, making me needy and desperate again.
Carson suddenly pulled away, breathing hard and looking strained. "Grace, baby, we need to slow this down. It's not gonna take much to–"
"Let's go inside," I whispered, moving off of him.
He just nodded and stood up quickly, grabbing the towels from under the bench and handing me one as I stood up. He reached to the side of the hot tub and switched off the jets. I couldn't look away from his body, his muscles flexing under his skin as he moved. He was exquisite.
I wrapped the towel around myself, the few seconds of cold air feeling good now as I followed him quickly back into the house.
When we got inside, he locked the back door behind us and led me down the hall to a small bedroom.
I looked around at the cozy room, filled with distressed, black furniture. The bed was a large, four-poster with white, down-filled bedding. It was unmade, as if Carson had gotten out of it not too long ago.
As I turned around to face Carson, the happiness and desire filling my body was so intense, I almost felt drugged.
He moved closer to me, and I studied his face as he took the towel from around my body and rubbed it gently through my hair again, leaving it just barely damp. I loved the look on his face, intensity hardening his features and yet his eyes filled with tenderness. All of that was for me. I grinned up at him.
"Never let go, baby," I repeated from earlier.
He laughed, and suddenly I was being walked backwards until I hit the bed and he was over me. "Never," he said and his mouth came down on mine.
**********
Carson
I pulled the comforter all the way over us and then pressed into her softness as we kissed deeply for long minutes, drinking each other in. I was lost in her, lost in the sounds she was making as I kissed her with everything I had in me. My Grace was naked, under me. It was as if I had never woken up this morning, but was still in my bed dreaming.
I broke from her lips and looked down into her lust-heavy eyes, just to convince myself that she was real, that she had really come to me through the miles and the snowstorm, through the years and all the reasons why everyone would have bet against us if they had looked at the two of us on paper. My heart squeezed tightly. She was so beautiful–her long, silky, blonde hair spread over my pillow, her cheeks flushed and her lips swollen from my kisses, dark pink from the abrasion of my non-shaved face. A fierce protectiveness filled my chest and I both reveled in the feel of it and accepted the emotional vulnerability that came with it. This was the way it should be–always. I leaned back in and kissed down her neck as she arched her head back into the pillow and sighed out my name. God, I liked hearing that. Best sound on the whole damn planet.
I was as hard as granite, my cock throbbing against her stomach, pre-cum practically pouring out of me. It'd been a fucking long time. I wasn't going to last long once I got inside of her. I hoped she would understand–I'd make it up to her the second time… and the third… and the fourth. I groaned against her skin.
I took one of her nipples into my mouth, licking and sucking it until she was rolling her hips against me and reaching her hand down between us, trying to put me inside of her on her own.
"Hold up, Grace," I whispered. "I want that too, but–"
She shook her head from side to side. "Please, I don't care. I just want you inside of me. I need that. Please."
I nodded and started kissing her again as I took myself in my hand and lined the head of my cock up at her entrance. She put one leg around my back and I surged inside of her tight, wet heat.
"Oh, God bless America," I groaned out at the exquisite feel of her all around me, gripping me tightly from inside. "You feel… oh God…"
She let out a small laugh, her internal muscles gripping me more tightly with her movement and I grinned against her mouth. I resumed kissing her, nipping at her lips, wanting to be attached in any and every way possible, all at once.
I started moving, my body demanding to take over. "I can't be slow," I choked out.
She shook her head, moving it from side to side on the pillow, "I
don't want slow."
With her words, I started moving, relishing the feel of not only the physical pleasure, but the reality of being connected to Grace in the most intimate way possible.
I moved in and out of her as she wrapped both legs around my back and tilted her pelvis up so that I could go deeper. My body was moving of its own accord, pounding, pushing, and taking the pleasure it had been denied for so long. "Grace," I panted. I felt drugged, yet hyper-alive, each nerve ending singing with pleasure.
"Carson, Carson," she breathed out, sending me spiraling higher.
I felt the tingling begin at the base of my spine, an orgasm swirling through my abdomen, and I moved even faster to claim it, my skin breaking out in goose bumps at the intensity.
Just as my climax hit me and I began to jerk inside Grace, she screamed out and I felt her pulsing around me as I came, spilling my seed inside of her as I thrust forward. I buried my face in her neck, moaning out at the same time I breathed her in.
I lay still for several seconds, feeling our mutual pulsating recede and finally fade away.
I pretended to let out a snore against her neck and she laughed out, and my cock, still halfway hard, slipped out of her a little bit with the movement.
I brought my head up and looked into her eyes, dancing with laughter. I grinned into her beautiful face and leaned forward and kissed her. As my lips met hers, something occurred to me and I leaned back quickly.
I closed my eyes for a beat, opening them and grimacing down at her. "I didn't use a condom. I'm so sorry. I don't even have one here anyway, but, fuck, I didn't even–"
She frowned slightly but then shrugged her shoulders. "It's okay. The timing's off anyway. I just ended my period a couple days ago. I think we're good."
I gazed down at her. "Okay," I said, rolling off and pulling her against me. I was quiet for a minute. In all the years that I had had sex, except on film, I had always used a condom. As I considered it now, I couldn't bring myself to care that we hadn't used one this time. I knew I probably should, but I just didn't.
After a couple minutes, I felt her breathing slow. I pulled the comforter all the way up to our necks and grinned up at the ceiling. Grace was asleep. She had traveled miles and miles, through the middle of the night, into a snowstorm, during Christmas, to come to me. I was filled with happiness and gratitude, and a deep peace, one that I hadn't felt for so very long. It calmed me and relaxed me and I gave in to it, falling into a peaceful sleep, my Buttercup wrapped up in my arms.
CHAPTER 30
Grace
I woke up slowly and snuggled into the warmth surrounding me. I was buried deep under a pile of blankets, the smell of Carson all around me. I sighed out in happiness and contentment.
I didn't know how long I'd been sleeping since the shades were closed and the room was dark. But Carson wasn't here.
I sat up and saw a duffle bag sitting near the closet and so I got out of bed and went over to it, peeking inside. The cabin was chilly, but not freezing, and I smelled the very faint smell of a wood fire burning.
There was a thermal, long-sleeved shirt right at the top of Carson's bag and so I pulled that over my head. I dug through his clothes a little bit more and found a pair of boxers. I smiled as I pulled them on and turned the waistband down so that they would stay up on me.
I went to the bathroom and did my business and used Carson's toothbrush. Then I left the bathroom and peeked down the hall. I didn't see Carson anywhere.
I walked back into the main room with the fireplace and really looked around this time. The kitchen was right behind it–an open floor plan, although because of a bar separating the two, I couldn't see it in its entirety. There was a fire blazing and the furniture was comfortable and rustic, plenty of throw blankets draped on the arms of the couch and side chairs. It was a room that made you want to snuggle up and stay awhile.
There were large windows on every wall with a view of the snow-covered pine trees surrounding the cabin. Snow was still falling gently outside.
"Sleep okay, Buttercup?" I heard as Carson's arms came around me from behind. He kissed the side of my neck and I tilted my head to give him better access.
"Hmmm," I sighed. "Why do you call me Buttercup?" I smiled and tilted my head even more, relishing the feel of his lips on my skin.
There was a slight pause behind me as his lips stilled against me, and I turned to face him. I gazed up questioningly, as his eyes filled with warmth. He looked back down at me in thought.
"When I was a boy, I used to pick buttercups in my granny's yard. She used to hold one up to my chin and I used to hold one up to hers, and when it reflected yellow, she told me it meant we liked butter."
He breathed out, a slight smile on his lips. My breath hitched in my throat, my heart beating loudly in my ears as I took in every word.
"When I asked her how the buttercup made a glow, she told me that anytime you liked something, or anytime you gave your heart away, its glow became a part of you and made you glow too. The very first time I saw you Grace, to me, you glowed. I thought I disliked you," he laughed softly, his expression tender, "but I couldn't deny that you glowed. To me, you shined. And you still do. All these years, Buttercup, and you still do."
I laughed out a small sob, tears filling my eyes as I pulled him to me and kissed his lips. We stood there for long minutes, cuddling and hugging each other close, him wiping my tears away when a few trickled down my cheeks.
"Thank you," I said softly. What he had given me hadn't come in bright, shiny paper, hadn't been tied up with a bow. But it was a gift nonetheless–he had given me the gift of his heart, the gift of the truth.
After a few minutes, when I had gotten a hold of myself, I leaned back and asked softly, "What time is it anyway?"
"It's only noon. You slept five hours or so."
I turned back around in his arms, looking out the large windows again. "It's so beautiful here," I whispered.
Carson nodded. "I know. I love it. Someday I'm gonna buy a place here." He brought his chin down to my shoulder. "Are you gonna let me take you snowboarding? Maybe tomorrow?" I could feel him grin against my neck.
I laughed softly and moved away from him, sitting down on the leather sofa, pulling a throw over my legs. "Sure. I just hope I don't show you up. I hear you're decent but…"
He laughed. "Well, now I'm nervous. Maybe I'll just save my pride and keep you in bed for the next couple days."
He sat next to me and pulled me into his arms so that my head was resting on his chest. I laughed. "Hmmm… you are good at that. It's not a bad idea actually."
He chuckled and we were quiet for a minute as he played with my hair gently and I watched the snow fall.
"Are you hungry? I have coffee made."
"Coffee sounds great. And I'm starving."
"Okay. Oh, I went and got Dylan's SUV while you were sleeping. There was a can of gasoline in the garage. I brought your suitcase in." He indicated his head toward my suitcase sitting by the door, the still-packed bag I had quickly picked up at my house on the way out of town.
"Thanks. That was pretty dumb of me to run out of gas. I'm usually slightly more competent than that." I grimaced.
"Nah, your mind was just preoccupied with other things," he said and I could hear the smile in his voice.
I looked up at him. "Very preoccupied," I agreed with a smile.
He kissed me gently and I moved away from him as he stood up. I watched his muscular ass move in his jeans as he walked to the kitchen. The memory of how that ass felt under my hands, the muscles clenching with movement as he thrust in and out of me made me shiver. Yeah, maybe that staying in bed for the rest of the week idea wasn't such a bad one.
Carson came back into the room ten minutes later with a cup of coffee and a plate of scrambled eggs and toast.
"I remembered how you like your coffee," he said, "but I don't know how you like your eggs. I hope that's okay."
"This is how I like my eggs," I sai
d with a smile. "Thank you."
He nodded, and I dug into my food. I hadn't eaten since the morning before when I'd grabbed a banana on my way out the door to the airport. God, that felt like a lifetime ago. Another life entirely.
I looked up at Carson, sitting on the opposite end of the couch, sipping his cup of coffee.
I put my plate down and held my hand out to him. He sat his cup down and scooted toward me, pulling me into his body so that I was snuggled up against his side.
I nuzzled into his neck and curled into him.
I felt a deep contentment settle through me, the knowledge that I had made the right decision vibrating in my very soul.
"What are you thinking about?" he whispered, nuzzling into my hair.
"Umm, you, me, us." I smiled.
"I like that topic," he said. "What about us?"
"I was just thinking how right this feels. I was thinking how sorry I am that it took me so long to realize it."
Carson chuckled. "It took you a week, Grace."
I smiled, kissing the crook of his neck. "Too long."
He sighed. "You had a few things going on. It was normal that you got spooked by me. I came on sort of strong."
"I like when you come on strong," I whispered.
"I know you do, Buttercup," he said with a smile.
I lifted my head and looked up at him, warmth filling me now that I knew the meaning of my nickname. "Just don't get carried away," I warned teasingly.
He laughed. "Please. You're the real boss here. You think I don't know that?" He looked down at me tenderly. "I'd do anything for you, Grace. I'd slay a dragon for you," he said softly.
I blinked up at him, taking in the sincerity in his eyes, the beauty of his face, the tenderness of his expression. I leaned up and kissed his soft lips, sucking his bottom one into my mouth and nipping it with my teeth.
I grinned up at him and he pulled me in to his side again.
After a second, I leaned back and looked into his face, biting my lip. I needed to ask him about something. He had said a woman's name in his sleep this morning. I had woken up briefly, but then gone back to sleep when he was silent again. I wasn't upset, after all, he'd told me he hadn't been with anyone since me. But I was curious.