I took my place beside Malakess at the top table with the leaders of the Nagini and Sulh of high rank. The Kymian phyle leader was present, the illustrious Poltenemy, who I had never seen before. He greeted me in a distant manner, and then devoted himself entirely to the Nagini. One of them sat on Malakess’s other side, so I was able to listen in to their conversation. It appeared that only a few of the delegation had graced the dinner. No second generation Nagini was present. I was eaten up with curiosity. I wanted to meet one of those younger hara. I had presumed the Nagini would be ascetic and distant, but this was not the case. They were perfectly affable with the Sulh and other tribes, maintaining their disdain for the Gelaming alone. Haruah, who sat next to Malakess, drank wine like any other har and then, before the dessert was brought in, showed us some conjuring tricks. He had a diamond set into one of his teeth, which glittered when he smiled. His jet black hair hung loose over his shoulders and was braided with golden beads. He was also first generation, and knew our language perfectly. I’d drunk more wine than I should have done by then, and said, ‘Will you teach me your magic?’
Haruah grinned. ‘Not magic, tiahaar, just illusion. Nohar learns the magic of the Nagini.’
Malakess laughed. ‘You are using on it us even now, my friend, aren’t you?’
Haruah gave Malakess a smouldering glance. ‘If you perceive so, then no. If I were, you would not be able to tell.’
‘Your magic is very strong,’ Malakess said.
I realised at that point that my presence might well become superfluous very soon. This depressed me. My mind was in such a spin, I wasn’t sure why exactly. When Malakess had met my eyes across a room, it had touched me. Did I desire him? Was that it? Why couldn’t I work out what I was feeling? One thing was obvious. I could not compete with this specimen of harish perfection now bewitching Malakess with his subtle magic. I felt about two years old.
Some time later, Malakess left the table to visit the bathroom. Haruah reached out and took hold of one of my hands. ‘It is only play,’ he said softly.
‘What is, tiahaar?’
He laughed and squeezed my fingers. ‘Do not drink any more.’ He winked. ‘Trust me.’
I felt my face grow hot, but put down the wine glass. ‘I don’t think… I don’t think I can do...’ I shook my head.
‘Then don’t think,’ said Haruah. He paused. ‘You will meet my son.’
‘Thank you, I’d like that.’
Another grin. ‘Oh, nothing to do with me, tiahaar. Nothing at all.’ It had not been an invitation but a foretelling. How strange.
It must have been well after two in the morning by the time Malakess decided we should leave. Actually getting out of the building took some time. Malakess was waylaid every few steps and had to arrange to have lunch, afternoon tea and then dinner with various Gelaming and Nagini. Sabarah, it was decided, would come to Huriel’s house to make sketches of me. My feet were aching, even though we’d been sitting down for most of the night, and my head was still half in some other dimension. The cool dark interior of Malakess’s carriage was a relief. I sighed and leaned back against the cushions.
‘You did very well,’ Malakess said as we began the journey home. ‘I know it was exhausting, but you were a credit to Kyme and to me.’
I grunted in response. The thought of my bed was the most delicious thing imaginable, or was it? Part of me was tired and aching, but another part was alert and panting for action. That part wanted to leap out of the carriage and run all the way home or perhaps away across the hills beyond Kyme. I could become a deer and just run for ever.
‘Gesaril?’
I opened my eyes and glanced at Malakess. What did he think of me really? Only a couple of weeks ago, I’d been affronted at the thought he might desire me, but now I thought he didn’t and that was somehow worse. Huriel had been right, it seemed. ‘What?’
He pulled a quizzical face. ‘You seem… strange.’
I put a hand over my eyes. ‘I am strange, yes.’ I lowered my hand. ‘You could have sent me home alone, you know. I wouldn’t have minded.’
He smiled. ‘I am not a har to rush things.’
What did that mean?
‘The Nagini are subtle,’ he continued. ‘But I am not as gullible as they think.’
‘Haruah is like a dehar,’ I said. ‘I can imagine him dancing, all in veils, which drop off one by one. By the final veil, you will nearly be dead with longing.’
Malakess laughed. ‘Striking imagery, Gesaril! But remember, the Nagini are named for serpent spirits. Handle with care if you don’t wish to be bitten, or constricted to death!’
‘A bite from a Nagini… hmm. I imagine it would take you to a world of dreams.’
Again, Malakess laughed. ‘You like them, don’t you. I think perhaps you should meet some of the younger ones.’
‘I’m told I will do.’ I swallowed, and it felt as if my throat were full of sand. ‘But maybe it is not the Nagini who inspire me, as our friend tiahaar Sabarah would say. Maybe it is somehar else.’
Malakess was silent, and a ringing tension filled the interior of the carriage. I shouldn’t have said that. Stupid of me.
I opened my mouth to speak again, but Malakess interrupted me. ‘You’ve drunk a lot, Gesaril. I’ll take you home.’
‘Don’t,’ I said. ‘Take me somewhere else.’
Malakess sighed, rubbed a hand over his mouth. ‘I am not Ysobi,’ he said.
Again, I was not sure of his precise meaning. He could have thought I wanted to pretend he was Ysobi, or was merely telling me he’d not take advantage of me as Ysobi had. ‘I know,’ I said. ‘You’re nothing like him.’
‘That’s not entirely true,’ Malakess said, ‘but nevertheless I’m taking you home.’
‘Kess…’ I had never called him that before. The short form of his name sounded intimate in my mouth.
‘No, Gesaril. I won’t be responsible for you in this way. Think about what you’re suggesting. Tomorrow, you’ll feel differently.’
‘I won’t. I felt this way before I started drinking. That’s the truth.’
Malakess hesitated before speaking. ‘It would be very easy for me, Gesaril, very easy, but you are young, in turmoil, and under my care. This would be good for neither of us. Now please, say nothing more.’
And so I didn’t. We finished the journey in prickly silence. At Huriel’s gate I got out of the carriage without speaking and didn’t close the door behind me. I wanted Malakess to call me back, but he didn’t. I heard him pull the door closed and then the driver urged the horses onward. I stood there listening until I could no longer hear the sound of their hooves.
This morning, I was so full of cringing shame I could barely move. I decided the best option was to stay in bed. I had virtually begged Malakess, one of the highest ranking hara in Kyme, to take aruna with me. How could I bear to continue living? It was too embarrassing to endure. I was used to every har I met desiring me, but Malakess had turned me down. My self-loathing was augmented by the fact I’d drunk so much the night before the effects were still in my body, which was unusual.
Huriel brought me breakfast and, towering over my bed, inspected my pathetic state. ‘A harish hangover,’ he said. ‘That’s novel, Gesaril.’
‘Leave me alone,’ I said and pulled the covers over my head.
‘Can’t,’ Huriel said. ‘Malakess has sent a note. You’re to join him for lunch with the Gelaming, or rather we are. I’m coming with you.’ My heart leapt at the news, but from what emotion it was difficult to tell.
I put my head out of the bed. ‘Kess has invited a Gelaming to stay here.’
‘I’ve already heard,’ Huriel said darkly. ‘Chrysm Luel. He’ll report back on us.’
I sat up and picked up a piece of toast from the tray Huriel had laid on the bed. ‘I was awful last night,’ I said. ‘I’m surprised Malakess wants to see me again.’
Huriel’s eyebrows shot up. ‘Why? What did you do? He didn’t
mention anything when he called round earlier.’
He’d been here? I tried to swallow the toast in my mouth and had to drink some tea to accomplish the task. ‘It’s your fault,’ I said.
‘Mine? How? What on earth happened?’
‘I threw myself at your mentor and he declined the offer. I was drunk, of course.’
‘Oh…’ Huriel pulled a face. ‘Oh well, no harm done. I’m glad to hear your libido has woken up.’
‘No harm done?’ I asked exasperatedly. ‘Really, Huriel. He must think me such a fool. He turned me down!’
‘He is aware of your history,’ Huriel said. ‘He wouldn’t take advantage. He probably thinks you should… get back into yourself, as it were, with somehar nearer your own age.’
‘Do you think that? Before, you implied I should take aruna with Malakess, that it would do me good.’
‘I don’t think it would be a bad thing,’ Huriel said, ‘but I’m not Malakess. I don’t know his reasons for declining your offer, but I’m sure he refused you because he thought it was best for you.’ He smiled. ‘Only weeks ago you were protesting how much it offended you he might desire you.’
‘I’m aware of the irony,’ I said. ‘I don’t know if I can face him today.’
‘Of course you can. This invitation is clearly extended to show you all is well.’
‘I suppose so.’
Huriel put his head to one side. ‘Do you feel for Malakess, Gesaril? This isn’t an Ysobi replacement thing, is it?’
‘I don’t feel for him, no… not like that. It was physical, that’s all.’
‘Well, it has been a long time since you last took aruna. You must remedy that as soon as possible.’
‘Is that an offer?’
Huriel laughed. ‘It seems you are in heat! It wasn’t an offer, no. I’m not the har you want, and you know it. Get dressed. We’re going out in an hour.’
I dressed myself in another of the expensive costumes Huriel had bought for me and pinned up my hair, allowing a few tendrils to dangle over my face. All the while I got ready, I kept myself in check. I could remember the excitement I’d felt getting ready to go to places where I’d known Ysobi would be. I couldn’t fall into the same trap here. I mustn’t look upon Malakess as a huge challenge just because he’d spurned me. It would be so easy to do that, and it would end badly. Huriel was right. I must find somehar else, maybe even a Gelaming. But then, it might all go wrong, because of what I’m like. I’m not good with aruna. I realise now that I enjoy the chase and making hara want me, but then it’s all too much and I’m scared of pain and bad memories, and I resent the hara for wanting me. It’s been such a relief not to feel any of that since I’ve been in Kyme. Damn harish needs! All because of a glance across a room. Ridiculous.
We took lunch in the hotel in town where the Gelaming were staying. It was, in fact, an elegant establishment and surely as good as anything in Immanion. Chrysm and his companions were dressed casually and looked much better for it, in my opinion. Malakess was already there with them when Huriel and I arrived. He greeted me as if nothing had happened the night before, and behaved towards me in a manner that suggested he was an unofficial hura to me. It did no good. All I could think about was touching his body, and even the acts of eating and drinking were charged with a sensual current.
‘So when are you going to invite me to dinner with the Nagini?’ Chrysm asked.
Malakess laughed. ‘You presume I can do that? They go their own way. It’s up to them.’
‘Oh, come on,’ Chrysm chided. ‘They like you. You could be our advocate and impress upon the Nagini we are not the evil they fear. I’ll make no secret of the fact it would be extremely good for me if I could go home with the Nagini under my belt. They should join the confederation of tribes.’
‘They would say they have no need of it,’ Malakess said. ‘I can’t put that kind of pressure on them, Chrysm. It’s up to you to seduce them.’
Chrysm pulled a wry face. ‘Perhaps that is the only route. Literally.’ He regarded Malakess steadily. ‘You want things from me, Kess. Maybe I’m prepared to trade for them.’
Malakess rested his elbows on the table, his chin upon his bunched hands. ‘I see. Now we get to the main course!’
Chrysm was unabashed. He made a languid gesture with one hand. ‘There’s no point in dissembling. You want our students and our endorsement. I have persuasive power in the Hegemony. Many of them are unconcerned with the Arts and consider it of minor consequence. I usually get my own way, simply because nohar else is interested in my aims.’
I was surprised Chrysm spoke so openly in front of Huriel and me, even if his fellow Gelaming were already aware of this situation. Chrysm considered us of minor consequence too, it seemed. I caught Huriel’s eye and he raised his eyebrows, took a drink of wine. I sensed his frosty disapproval. It was insulting to imply the Sulh could be bought.
‘I will arrange a dinner,’ Malakess said at last. ‘The rest is up to you.’
Huriel sighed, shook his head once, almost imperceptibly, and reached for the wine bottle. Chrysm ignored him, if he’d noticed the gesture, and I have no doubt that he had. ‘Excellent, Kess!’ He nodded towards me. ‘Make it an intimate affair. Bring your beautiful protégé. I noticed tiahaar Haruah took a shine to him.’
That was beyond propriety, but Malakess did not react badly. ‘Gesaril, what do you think of that?’
‘I can dance on my hind legs and balance a ball on my nose,’ I said. I couldn’t resist it.
Chrysm laughed. ‘That’s the spirit!’ he said. He raised his glass. ‘To mutual success and satisfaction.’
For all his brashness and sometimes inappropriate directness, Chrysm Luel does have a certain appealing manner. He makes you feel included, somehow, part of something important. I don’t think Huriel felt that at all, but then Chrysm paid him little attention and clearly considered him of little use other than providing accommodation that might bring him nearer to the Nagini. Chrysm’s personal staff would bring his luggage over to Huriel’s house tomorrow. The Gelaming were being entertained by the phylarch, Poltenemy that evening.
Once business was concluded, as far as Chrysm was concerned, the conversation turned to idle chat. Chrysm made us laugh a lot. He was quite rude about some of other Hegemons, mimicking their speech and actions. His coterie of artists and writers clearly delighted in this and sucked up to him appallingly.
As the hotel staff cleared away the remains of our meal, Chrysm turned to me. ‘It would please me greatly if you’d show me around Kyme this afternoon,’ he said.
I knew immediately he had other things on his mind as well, and wasn’t sure what to say. Should I accept? There was a huge obstacle I had to jump over in my head and this might be the helping hand I needed. ‘Well…’ I began.
‘I’m sorry, I must deprive you,’ Malakess interrupted. ‘Gesaril has work to do today.’
‘What about my sketches?’ Sabarah demanded. Everyhar ignored him.
‘Oh, have a heart, my friend,’ Chrysm said. ‘Give the har a day off.’
Malakess maintained his sweetness. ‘I wish I could, but you do want us to make arrangements with the Nagini for you, don’t you?’
‘You know I do,’ Chrysm said. He sighed and smiled at me. ‘A pity. Oh well, another time. I expect to remain in Kyme for some days.’ He stood up and bowed to Malakess. ‘Send me word when the arrangements are confirmed. Will it be tonight?’
‘I think perhaps tomorrow at the earliest,’ Malakess said. ‘Give me some time.’
‘As you wish.’ Chrysm turned to Huriel. ‘My staff will bring my effects to your house in the morning. I’ll be arriving myself around lunch time. Thank you for your offer. I always feel more at ease in private houses.’
‘My pleasure,’ Huriel said tightly.
Chrysm jerked his head to his sycophantic group and they trailed out of the dining room after him.
‘Pompous, conceited ass!’ Huriel declared. ‘Really, Ke
ss, I don’t know how you can stand pandering to him.’
‘I can endure it if it provides a result,’ Malakess said. ‘Don’t let it get to you, Huriel.’
‘Suggesting you give Gesaril to the Nagini, though… that was outrageous, and an insult to both Sulh and Nagini, not to mention a tremendous slur upon Gesaril himself.’
‘It’s all right,’ I said, laying a hand on Huriel’s arm; the flesh and bones were tense beneath my fingers. ‘I don’t mind. I’ll do what’s necessary to help.’
‘Not that, you won’t!’ Huriel said. ‘Don’t go near Chrysm Luel, Gesaril. He’ll eat you up and spit out the bones.’
‘Is that an order, father?’ I said sweetly.
‘Yes,’ Huriel said. ‘It’s an order, son.’
I glanced at Malakess. What did he think?
‘Huriel’s right,’ Malakess said.
‘What do you want me to do this afternoon?’ I asked him.
‘Nothing. I made that up to excuse you from his company.’
‘Oh.’
Malakess turned to Huriel. ‘I thought I’d bring Haruah and a couple of his hara to your place tonight. Is that all right?’
‘Perfectly,’ Huriel said. ‘We’ll go back at once and inform Rayzie and Ystayne. Do the Nagini have any special dietary requirements?’
‘I don’t know,’ Malakess said. ‘But I’ll go to the Academy and find out. They’re staying there. One of their hara can come over to you.’
‘Excellent. He and my staff can go shopping.’ Huriel got to his feet. ‘Come along, Gesaril.’ He was getting more like a father or hostling at every passing moment.