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VIOLET TURNED ONTO Crystal Cliff Road. Her eyes darted from the luxury estates, hidden behind wrought iron-gated properties along one side, to the trees lining the woods on the other side. The leg not pushing the pedal bounded at a rapid pace.
What if she chickened out? You’re not five years old, you’re an adult. Adults don’t chicken out.
Violet pushed a hand on her left leg, as she spotted movement in the long grass on her right. A man walked away from the six-foot grass blowing in the breeze and toward the road. Violet wouldn’t have pressed on the breaks had she not recognized the man wearing only brown slacks and no shirt.
Mr. Carlex. Ryder’s dad. Only, he was half the size he used to be and his burly figure was now frail bones.
Violet pulled over and climbed out, leaving her worry about Ryder behind her.
The closer she walked toward Mr. Carlex, the worse he looked. His once knowledgeable, smiling eyes were sunken and confused, darting around like he was lost.
What was he doing walking around in a bush wearing no shirt, and still a quarter mile from the Carlex estate?
Donald turned away from Violet and started back toward the grass that led to the bush. A bush one could easily get lost in, and from the confused look across the older man’s face, it didn’t appear as though Donald was aware of where he was headed.
Violet panicked. She was still over twenty feet away from Donald and would have to climb down the steep ditch. What if she lost sight of him once he went back through the long grass?
“Mr Carlex!” Violet called, stopping short at the edge of the road, the tips of her heels kicking up pebbles and dust.
Donald didn’t look back at her, he didn’t even acknowledge her voice. He disappeared into the green shrubbery and Violet was forced to climb, slide and trip down the sharp ditch scattered with two-foot high grass and hard soil beneath her heels. She wished she’d worn shorts or pants, instead of the cotton, navy, t-shirt dress she’d chosen, so she could slip into her office after talking Ryder.
She made it half way down on her feet and then fell the rest of the way on her rear. Only the thin material of her panties separated her from the rough grass, rocks and dirt. Violet didn’t have time to pay attention to the damage on the back of her stinging legs. She dusted her derriere and without reservation, she ran through the high grass, struggling to follow the flattened path of Mr. Carlex.
“Mr. Carlex! Mr. Carlex!” She continued shouting his name until she broke through the grass and stopped abruptly, almost falling forward.
Violet sighed a breath of relief when her eyes fell on Mr. Carlex; he had stopped too.
He stared at the ground, where she’d emerged, making no eye contact with her. Sabin stood at his feet, obedient to his owned, but wagged his tail when Violet called out to him.
Trying to catch her breath, Violet sucked in a deep lungful of air, before she turned her full attention to Ryder’s dad.
This man neither looked nor acted like the Mr. Carlex that had gracefully made speeches at her mother’s events, with his poised, confident smile, that encouraged others to open their chequebooks for every wonderful event Eliza had thrown. Violet was sure, if anywhere else, she might not have recognized him at all. He looked like he’d ages twenty years in the last two years since she’d seen him last.
“Mr. Carlex, what are you doing out here?” Violet asked, but she prepared herself for him not to answer.
He didn’t answer right away, more interested in staring intently at the ground around them. Violet was more concerned about how she was going to get him back up the ditch.
When Donald finally answered, it came out slow at first, as if he was struggling to remember what he was thinking and sounded like a child answering her.
“I want to go home.”
The bush was not the way to his house.
“Do you need a ride?” she offered, omitting the part where she was heading to his house, planning on confessing her stubborn feelings to his annoyingly handsome, pushy and sweet son. She had a sinking feeling Mr. Carlex wouldn’t have heard her if she had.
Donald still avoided eye contact with her and repeated, “I want to go home.”
“I will take you home.”
“I want to go home.” He said it louder, shouting at the end. “I want to go home.” And louder again. He was acting...child-like.
Violet had seen symptoms like this before and they were an awful lot like Alzheimer’s or dementia.
Dementia? Mr. Carlex had dementia? How did Violet not know this? How did nobody know this? It finally struck her...Because Ryder was hiding it.
After great effort, including using soft tones to Donald like she did with her grouchy son, and mentioning every name she could in hopes of sparking a memory, Violet finally got him in the car and drove to the Carlex estate, but not before Mr. Carlex had planted an elbow across her jaw. She didn’t blame him, he was confused.
Her jaw pounded with pain. When she touched the area, it swelled against her fingers. She was going to need some ice.
Her concern for herself diminished when she parked in front of the Carlex estate, and absorbed the pain and worry Ryder conveyed from where he stood beside the grand circular stairs.
He stood with two women. Both looked to be in their early twenties. Ryder’s hands were flaring in every direction, while the shorted blonde-haired woman, who wore mask of concern, tried to calm him by touching his arm. Ryder jerked away only to start the action with the tall brunette, whose soft blue dress matched her tender approach.
When they became aware of Violet’s vehicle, their eyes relaxed when they realized Mr. Carlex sat in the passenger’s seat. Relief danced across all three of their faces.
Who were these women? Had Ryder moved on so quickly? Was she the fool who thought she was falling in love and he was the player everyone said? No. Stop it, Violet.
These were her terrified thoughts. The very ones that would have her simply depositing Donald and excusing herself so she didn’t have to face the reality. Good or bad, she wasn’t running away from this.
Both women rushed to the passenger’s side of her car, pulling the door open. Their soft voices soothed the man who had screamed a fit not even a minute earlier, scaring the daylights out of Violet. Donald was quick tempered but quick to settle down.
When Donald emerged from the car, Ryder’s arms went around his father for a long embrace.
Violet stood back and watched. There was no recollection in Donald’s eyes for his son, who was filled with fear and relief at his dad’s return.
Violet felt the tears for Ryder form along the rim of her eyes. She held her breath, hoping...praying...that Donald wouldn’t pull away from Ryder in another fit. She watched how much Ryder needed his dad...or what was left of him...and her heart was breaking with each long, aching second that went by. Ryder hadn’t only lost his mother, he’d lost his dad and nobody had known it.
“Hi, I’m Susan.” The shorter of the two women stopped beside Violet and squeezed her hand.
“And this is Kelly.” As Violet’s eyes moved to the young...so very young woman...who gave a little wave, Violet’s heart stopped.
What was she thinking coming here? Trying to win Ryder back, when he’d already moved on and was here with Susan and Kelly?
“Hello. Nice to meet you both. I’m Violet Caliendo.” Professionalism was her best trait...even when she was dying inside.
“Yes, I recognize you.”
Who didn’t?
“Kelly and I are Donald’s workers and I can’t tell you enough how grateful we are for you bringing him back safe. We will still call the doctor in to confirm his condition, but thank you.”
It all made sense now. Ryder was hiding his dad’s condition from the outside world and when she asked about Susan and Kelly, he hadn’t been ready to tell her.
Why not? Because you were acting like a child hiding in the shadows.
Be
fore Violet could express a welcome, Susan hugged her. Susan was a good foot-and-a-half shorter than Violet and her head rubbed against Violet’s arm. Violet patted her back, feeling out of place.
When Susan pulled away, she wore a huge smile. “If Ryder’s mood lately has anything to do with you, which I know for a fact it does, then I’m sure we will be seeing a lot of each other in the future.”
Ryder’s mood? Was it good? Or bad? Was it both?
Violet wanted to ask, but knew now was not the time. This was the secret Ryder couldn’t tell her. These women that he couldn’t explain but had nothing to do with shacking up with.
Violet felt like a heel.
“I found him down the road. He was wandering through the grass and heading to the bush. I would have called Ryder’s cell, but he wasn’t that uncooperative. We managed.” Skinned legs, a sore jaw later and she was pretty sure this dress was unsalvageable.
Kelly touched her arm. “Thank you for bringing him back.”
Ryder let go of Mr. Carlex, only to grip his shoulders and run his eyes across his dad, for what she assumed were signs of injury. When he came up empty-handed, besides a handful of minor scrapes across his bare torso, Ryder looked relieved...a little.
Ryder cupped the sides of his dad face and pulled him against his forehead. “Dad, you scared me. I’m so sorry.” His coarse whisper travelled all the way to Violet. The pain that laced his words, as Ryder talked to a man who didn’t acknowledge them, brought tears to Violet’s eyes.
Donald yanked away, lost in his own world of confusion, stumbling out of Ryder’s grasp.
The horror of his reaction showed an exhausted tale of years dealing with his father’s memory loss across Ryder’s face, along with grief and a look of agonizing acceptance.
Violet wiped away the tears that slid down her cheeks.
The two women rushed over, escorting Donald away and leaving Ryder to stand alone. The color of his face was stripped away, like he’d seen a ghost. With Donald unrecognizing his own son, wasn’t it like Ryder was staring at a ghost?
Kelly squeezed Ryder’s arm, before leaving, in a caring, platonic manner. It stabbed guilt into Violet’s heart. She had battled every stage of their connection, not knowing the complex life Ryder was hiding, or the grief he was living with.
Sabin followed behind the trio, moving slowly and exhausted like his owner. Tank was nowhere to be seen, leaving only Ryder and Violet.
Violet wanted to close the distance between them and embrace Ryder as hard and long as he’d done with his father, but his tense shoulders and pacing kept her grounded.
His face was tear-stained and puffy, with clouds of a storm rolling through his eyes. The agony transformed his sea blue eyes, to an unsettling navy blue. His leather, thong sandals slammed against the ground, thudding anger, frustration and misery that looked to be intensifying with each step. Ryder looked like he was ready to explode. Violet wasn’t sure what to do.
Violet couldn’t be certain Ryder even acknowledged her presence. He hadn’t looked at her, not once. His attention was consumed by the safety of his father.
What had happened? Why was he out wondering on his own?
Violet didn’t dare to ask.
“Ryder?” she said softly, but loud enough that he would hear her.
Nothing. His pace continued, drilling his eyes to the ground.
Violet stepped to his side, as he passed and touched his arm. “Ryder?”
Ryder yanked away, his feet keeping him along his path.
On his way back, Violet took a deep breath and stepped in front of him, hoping he didn’t push her to the ground. His strapping, powerfully built body, just like his father’s had once been, would take Violet’s tall, tiny body down the ground.
Ryder stopped.
Her body thanked him silently.
The breath she’d been holding, blew out and was lost by the deep breaths coming from Ryder, breaths of a man trying to hold back the tears that threatened.
Violet only stood still long enough to look at him and give him the time to recognize her. Once those blue eyes softened and his lips pinched together, Violet’s arms went around his neck. She pulled him against her.
He had no one.
Cancer had taken his mother and dementia was taking his father. Nothing in the world could prepare someone to deal with this change, this loss. And Ryder, an only child, was taking care of his father alone. Violet couldn’t even begin to comprehend the ache, the sorrow or the isolation Ryder must feel keeping this secret.
Violet hadn’t known what Ryder would do after she watched him yank away from Susan and Kelly, but even a strong-willed man like Ryder had to stop and let someone in...sometime.
Ryder hugged her back.
His thick, strong arms squeezed around her so tightly around her ribcage that it hurt. But Violet didn’t move, wince or object. Right now, he needed her strength and she gave it to him.
Ryder buried his face into her shoulder and the tears she’d known were at the surface fell with great sobs against her shoulder. This was why he was redesigning the company. This disease was the reason no one had seen Mr. Carlex in two years.
This was the best kept secret in Willow Valley.
Violet was sure they’d stood there for a half hour or longer, listening to the wind rustle the trees around them. It felt like forever and every second that passed she felt more of his pain creating a stronger connection between them.
When Ryder finally pulled away, it was as though he took part of her with him. He didn’t go far, about a foot away, and then he grasped the sides of her face, much like he’d done with his dad, only Ryder kissed her.
The taste of his salty kiss was only a reminder of his pain. The force of his lips, were not motivated by lust or desire he had for her. No, Ryder was hiding from his pain. Hiding with his secrets. Apparently Violet hadn’t been the only one hiding...the question was, why was Ryder hiding his father’s condition from everyone?
Violet wanted to kiss him forever, but he needed someone to talk to right now and not distract himself again with someone else.
She gently covered his hands with hers and pulled her lips away from his. “Ryder,” Violet breathed against his lips, a plea for him to stop. A plea for him to talk to her.
Ryder didn’t take it well. He pulled away, turned and started up the stairs.
“Ryder?” Violet called after him. Her feet didn’t move, her mind froze and she wasn’t sure what to do.
Do I leave him? Do I follow him? What is he doing?
Ryder turned and was back down the stairs in an instant, standing so close she could reach out to him. The glare he sent her, didn’t allow her fingers to move.
“What?” His snarl made her swallow, unable to answer.
What was she supposed to say?
Ryder ran his hands through his hair. She’d never seen him look so dishevelled. An expensive designer suit didn’t emphasize his brawny build like the white t-shirt he was wearing now.
“What are you doing here?” he said and the coolness from his tone ran across his face. It wasn’t the greeting Violet had been hoping for, but he was only lashing out because of the situation.
It wasn’t the right time to tell him her true feelings. “Ryder, no one knows about your dad,” she said.
Ryder’s demeanor turned as cold as ice, as Joel had claimed she was and asked, “Did you want something?”
Violet didn’t know if she should answer, but she’d come all this way and feared if she didn’t tell him now, she might not be able to work up the courage again. “I wanted to tell you that I am finished hiding in the shadows.”