Read Swashbuckler Page 3

spy in dressing-gown.

  I hope that for our sake, she is on the same side,

  Or it will be simpler to try and hold the tide.

  COLIN

  How did you meet such a powerful enemy?

  HENRY

  Doing what she does best : trying to poison me.

  It happened in Prussia, five or six years ago,

  We were there to put an end to an imbroglio

  Between our respective countries. For some reason,

  (He hesitates, not sure of the circumstances)

  I killed her informant – he committed treason,

  I remember – she wanted to get her revenge,

  So, she decided to poison me in exchange.

  We met again in London, also in Denmark.

  I got stomach ache there, which is the true hallmark

  Of her peculiar, deadly – not to say twisted –

  Talent. Of course, she denied it when confronted.

  (‘Tis not impossible it was the halibut,

  Which I learned later on was seasoned with walnut –

  I’m allergic, see.) Anyway, she’s intrepid.

  ROBIN

  It seems she must not be underestimated.

  HENRY

  No, she must not. And if indeed she goes to Prague…

  ‘Tis not a matter to be treated like a blague.

  Swashbuckler, you met her already, haven’t you?

  SWASHBUCKLER

  I have. She was sent to Paris…twice, I’d argue.

  Two people were poisoned, as far as I can tell,

  Though she was not accused. ‘Tis quite a mighty spell

  Under which she keeps everyone. Power to sway…

  HENRY

  Power to slay…

  SWASHBUCKLER

  Only Russia she won’t betray.

  She has acquired, in a bizarre way, quite a fame.

  People who get to know her are never the same.

  (Colin has finished his plate and mug)

  Let’s not delay. Colin, now that you are nourished,

  We must go out and find traitors to be punished.

  (Turns to Henry and Robin)

  Gentlemen if I may, I will leave you to rest.

  ROBIN

  (Makes a move to stand up)

  But…we must come with you.

  SWASHBUCKLER

  No, this is not a jest.

  I will inform you when I have something solid.

  HENRY

  (Henry stays Robin’s hand)

  We will remain here till you have a clue valid.

  (Exeunt Swashbuckler and Colin)

  ROBIN

  Why not go? It is not the time to be sheepish.

  HENRY

  It is neither the time to rush nor be foolish,

  Your Ladyship.

  ROBIN

  Shush, please! I told you oftentimes :

  If we ever are to help uncover those crimes,

  We need stay hid, stealthy. If you keep uttering

  My titles or my names, we will soon fail the King.

  I need not remind you, it took me some effort,

  To convince him wholly and garner his support.

  HENRY

  You told me about Butler, how he was your friend.

  ROBIN

  He betrayed all of us. I feel I must amend

  The mess he created. I should have seen through him.

  HENRY

  You cannot blame yourself, few men are what they seem.

  ROBIN

  But I’ve known him for years. I never suspected…

  Butler was a mentor, in me in confided.

  It was more than friendship, almost propinquity,

  That linked us since childhood. Strong was our amity.

  For I who knew him well, no event’s remembered

  Would tell of ill feelings for England he harbored.

  I fear I put the kingdom in jeopardy.

  If a war breaks out, who, Henry, will forgive me?

  HENRY

  No one, because no one man will dare accuse you.

  I will personally strike and kick those who do.

  You are no accomplice but a victim like us.

  Your innocence we will never need to discuss.

  Why Butler did betray England remains hidden,

  But that you are loyal to her is a given.

  ROBIN

  I hope you speak the truth but am still fraught with guilt.

  I think of what Butler did, everything he built.

  He was a stern pillar of our institutions

  He worked in politics and served many functions ;

  Members of parliament knew and respected him ;

  He was always proper, well-dressed, formal, and prim.

  Now it is up to me to find out what happened,

  To a man such as him.

  HENRY

  Maybe he was frightened.

  ROBIN

  Maybe…That’s what we will have to shine a light on.

  Now let us sleep before setting this in motion.

  (Exeunt Henry, Robin)

  Scene 4

  (The inn, late in the evening. Enter Moineau, Tew, Avery)

  MOINEAU

  It was most tedious, roaming over the sea,

  Yet not worse than the ride to complete our journey.

  We be now in Paris, ‘tis only a first step,

  Before getting to Prague.

  TEW

  Aye, only one more prep,

  Then we be sailin’.

  AVERY

  Aye, the ocean calls to us.

  We need travel with haste, find this Aquarius,

  Relieve him from his secrets and all his treasures.

  MOINEAU

  We be on land, one-sack, ‘tis no place for seizures.

  What we do with a ship we refrain here on land.

  The oceans are vast, infinitely they expand.

  Countries are small, cities even smaller.

  AVERY

  Ahr!

  TEW

  Aye!

  MOINEAU

  We be subtle, we be ; discreet. We have to lie.

  Remember what we said, from now on take an air

  Like ye belong here. At worst, ye be a corsair,

  No longer a pirate. ‘Tis best if you adjust

  Your vocabulary.

  AVERY

  Better to gain their trust.

  MOINEAU

  Yes. Now, as to what my father divulged to me.

  The magus got his hands on papers from John Dee,

  (He was an occultist who conversed with angels,

  Turned trinkets into gold, and gave the Queen counsels).

  ‘Tis the second we need, Dee’s magic formula,

  if we are to revive, our dear Libertalia.

  When we have gold we can rebuild Utopia,

  Accept any pirate, outcast or pariah,

  And be free men once more, like we all envision,

  Enjoying life’s pleasures beyond rhyme and reason.

  AVERY

  And drink rum.

  TEW

  Eat delicacies.

  AVERY

  Drink some more rum.

  MOINEAU

  Yes, yes…When we’ve acquired the necessary sum.

  TEW

  I can’t wait to be there, but how will we bargain?

  AVERY

  We have naught to offer.

  MOINEAU

  All we need is a brain.

  Everyone one has a price, whether gold or knowledge.

  But we will find a way, dear fellows, this I pledge.

  Scene 5

  (The scene takes place at night in a small street of Paris, under a porch. Under cover of darkness, two hooded individuals meet)

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  I trust you had no real problem leaving England.

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  ‘Twas easy, easier than running an errand.

  Butler did well, he was true to his word.


  CONSPIRATOR 1

  I knew

  He would. He had to.

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  Well, he confessed nothing new

  When tortured.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  We made a deal he could not refuse.

  More than just a debt, he had a lot to lose.

  His reputation, friends or family members…

  Potential fires for which we kept the embers.

  Men have many weaknesses ; rare those who have few.

  No man has none.

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  ‘Twas pity to discontinue

  Our relationship. He didn’t know much.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  Enough,

  Is what he gathered. Don’t refrain from being tough

  With pawns. Ever. How did you get rid of the fool?

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  I went to look for a vagrant in a cesspool,

  Gave him so many coins, told him to find a guard,

  Warn of his suspicions, they should not disregard.

  He did as he was told, sicced the dogs on Butler.

  It was a nice plan.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  We could not have done subtler.

  Have they found anything? Did they follow your track?

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  It will be never when we come under attack.

  Those dunces wouldn’t find where in Paris does flow

  The Seine. You have nothing to fear, they are too slow.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  Do they know about Prague?

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  Yes, they suspect as much.

  That is all they have, though. You remain out of touch.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  Have you left the clue as instructed?

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  Yes I did.

  They should acquire it soon for it was poorly hid.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  When are they leaving then?

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  Probably tomorrow.

  I will send you a message as soon as I know.

  The documents are safe and ready for travel.

  By the time they comprehend, try to unravel –

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  It will be too late. Keep up the good work, agent.

  Inform us whenever you can.

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  If it’s urgent.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  About the Englishmen…

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  Yes?

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  Are they dangerous?

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  The older one of them. He is illustrious.

  He was sent on missions many times for England.

  Even in lost causes, he got the upper hand.

  As for the other one, the young, called Robin Moore,

  I’ve never heard of him. Surely he is not poor,

  His bearing attests to it. He must be noble,

  To a lesser extent.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  It is remarkable…

  Why would they send him along? Why send such a youth?

  He is not a soldier, his manners are so – couth.

  It is so visible, in his stand, in his speech.

  If this man is a spy, I myself am a beech.

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  Not to worry, I will personally shed a light

  On his nature. One thing : he does know how to fight.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  That won’t help him and it won’t deter us either,

  Am I wrong?

  CONSPIRATOR 2

  Not at all.

  CONSPIRATOR 1

  Then I’ll see you later.

  The ride is exacting to the magic city.

  I need be fit for when we unveil the treaty.

  Act II

  Scene 1

  (Back at the inn, early in the morning. Enter Swashbuckler)

  SWASHBUCKLER

  Yesterday afternoon, despite a thorough search,

  We uncovered naught. I will not let thieves besmirch

  Either myself, my allies or beautiful France.

  ‘Tis time I set the tune to this unwonted dance.

  I will draw my old sword that slumbers in my sheath,

  Take my enemies’ heads, and with them make a wreath

  To be displayed for all to see as a warning.

  We cannot delay more, must leave by the evening.

  ‘Tis three days to reach Prague, three more before the ball,

  Waiting any longer would be detrimental.

  (Enter a chevau-léger)

  CHEVAU-LEGER 1

  Swash! Good news : we have some newfound information.

  You remember how you caught the spy? What fashion?

  SWASHBUCKLER

  He was lurking around the Barrière de Reuilly,

  Not so far from the cour des miracles.

  CHEVAU-LEGER 1

  Exactly!

  That’s where we went, to question some thieves and vagrants.

  We found in some orphans some worthy informants.

  With the help of loaves of bread and a few deniers,

  We found a hiding place. With some chevaux-légers

  We ascertained the tip.

  SWASHBUCKLER

  Is it true? Revealing?

  CHEVAU-LEGER 1

  All the more that it was confirmed by a drawling

  Wretch who went to see the guard. We know they are there…

  Anarchists…

  SWASHBUCKLER

  Let’s cause them to be the worse for wear.

  I’ll wake the Englishmen, they have to be hustled ;

  The Americans too will need to be bustled ;

  Colin will be up when I kick the door wide open.

  Useful information does not happen often.

  We need make haste to our implacable foes’ lair.

  Praises and thanks will wait, for my men and their flair.

  (Enter Colin, then Henry and Robin, then John and Patrick)

  You probably wonder why I gathered you here.

  COLIN

  We don’t, you have uncovered aught.

  HENRY

  That much is clear.

  SWASHBUCKLER

  Indeed. My men spotted an abandoned building

  Used by anarchists for temporary housing.

  JOHN

  Where is it?

  SWASHBUCKLER

  Close to where we arrested Butler.

  ROBIN

  Please tell me that, this time, we’re going together.

  I could not bear staying behind one more instant.

  SWASHBUCKLER

  Only if