With the condom in place, he grabbed the back of my neck and brought me to him for a kiss. His mouth was gentle, caring. Unlike anything I thought Walker could be. As his mouth made me fall even deeper under his spell, he took his hardness and rubbed it against me, pushing my panties out of the way.
“Have you ever had a guy inside you?” he asked, his voice husky in the night.
I shook my head no, trembling at the feeling of him at my entrance.
“Then we’ll do this on your terms. Tell me when,” he said.
I was scared, wondering who this girl was on top of Walker. I didn’t sleep around or give random blowjobs. I had never been with a man before except for the occasional fooling around. I had seen what sex could do to a woman and it wasn’t pretty.
But with Walker it felt right.
“I’m ready,” I said in a whisper.
Walker grabbed my hips, his fingers digging into my flesh, frantic to get what he wanted. Punishing anyone that got in his way. His mouth covered mine again, his tongue plummeting inside. He was rough, conquering everything in me. I felt his cock at my opening. At first he just rubbed against me then he pushed inside.
And just like that, reality crashed down.
I stilled, my hand going to his chest, stopping him. I had never had sex before. Now here I was, straddling Walker in a car. Him in me.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, his body pulsating in mine.
“I … I don’t think I can do this,” I said. He was too big. I was too small. The invasion, the size of him scared me.
Walker stilled. Forced restraint made his body go rigid. He was breathing heavily, the drag of air into his lungs labored and barely controlled. His fingers tightened on my hips painfully. I grimaced, fearing him in that second. Not the man he was but the beast I knew he could be.
“Don’t move,” he whispered, his cock still buried an inch or two inside my body. A muttered “damn” escaped him a second before he yanked my head down, seeking my mouth. My lips were swollen and raw but his kiss wasn’t brutal. It was perfect, touching every inch of my lips with care. Expressing what we were both terrified of - our feelings for each other.
“I could come right now,” he said. “Halfway in you and I could come, you’re so damn hot and tight around me.”
Warmth traveled up my body. I whimpered, part of me wanting to sink down on him, but he held me still.
“But you’re right, Sam. We shouldn’t do this. I don’t want to take your virginity tonight. Not in my car and not like this.” His lips moved to my ear, his hands keeping me prisoner. “But when we do I’ll fuck you hard and fast, making you come again and again. There’ll be no going back, Sam. Once I have your body, it will be you and me. Us. Get used to the sound of that.”
He lifted me off him, his body pulling out of mine. With swift movements, he removed the condom and tucked himself back into his jeans. I sank back into the passenger seat, feeling nervous and embarrassed. I started working on the buttons of my dress. My fingers shook and felt like useless appendages, unable to push a tiny button through a tiny hole.
By the time I had my dress back to normal and my hair smoothed down, Walker’s jaw was set in a hard, firm line. Tautness lined his body and burned in his eyes. He turned the key in the ignition with a jerk, his movements short. I swallowed past the sudden lump in my throat. I didn’t know men very well but if my mama’s visitors were any indication, they didn’t like to be teased and left hanging.
And I had just left Walker hanging big time.
A flash of lightning hit somewhere close. In the light, Walker appeared big and dangerous. He gripped the steering wheel tightly, looking like he was trying to calm down. I remembered all the times I had doctored my mama’s black eyes or dark bruises after she had told a man ‘no.’ They replayed in my mind, haunting me.
“Sorry, Walker,” I said. “I shouldn’t have led you on. It’s just that I…I got cold feet and---”
Walker turned to look at me, bleakness in his eyes. “Don’t apologize, Sam. Never say you’re sorry to me. I don’t deserve it.”
I winced. “It’s just that my mama has gotten some bruises for changing her mind so I know it’s bad to take a guy that far and say no.”
“Jesus, Sam. You really think…”
Walker squeezed his eyes shut. When he opened them again, grief stared back at me.
“That’s your mama, Sam, and those men. We aren’t them. I don’t hit girls and you … you’re perfect.” He rubbed a hand over his face then took a deep breath, looking at me. “Listen, Sam, I’ve done some bad things in my life but you’re not going to be one of them. I’ll never hurt you. Hell, I’d rather you hate me than think I’d hurt you.”
He leaned across the gearshift and kissed my lips, so gently that I felt a tug at my heart.
Outside rain beat down on the car, fogging the windows and keeping us hidden, but inside the truth hit me. Walker was still destruction in a perfect package.
But that destruction had just turned sweeter.
Chapter Twenty–Two
-Walker-
What the hell just happened? Minutes ago Sam was going to give me the ride of my life. Now here I was, blue-balled and driving to her house with the mother of all hard-ons, cursing and calling myself a fool the entire time.
I had my cock halfway in her when she bolted, ripping the carpet out from under me. I’d been in heaven. Pure, mind-blowing heaven. She was so damn wet and tight that I could have come with no effort whatsoever. I don’t know what had been better – my dick inside her or her lips wrapped around it. The sight of her going down on me, her long black hair brushing against my thighs and balls, had me wanting to pull over and finished what we started. I never thought I would live to see the day when Samantha Ross would wrap her sweet mouth around me then let me put my dick inside her.
I gripped the steering wheel tighter. Shit, I’d lost my mind. The alcohol had finally destroyed the last of my brain cells. I had almost taken her virginity. My best friend’s little sister. Fuck.
I sneaked a peek at Sam as we went under a streetlight. She was staring out the rain-splattered window, avoiding looking at me.
“Are you taking me home?” she asked, watching out the window as I turned the corner.
“Yeah,” I said, wincing. The girl almost gave me her virginity and here I was – Mr. Chatty Cathy.
I turned into my old neighborhood. The headlights of my car broke through the rainfall, highlighting the cracked and broken pavement ahead. On a normal day, the place looked like a dump. Trash littered the streets and potholes as big as tires dotted the road. The city had torn up one section of the street months ago but had left it unfinished due a meth lab raid gone bad. A gunfight had broken out in front of the construction, leaving one police officer and four drug dealers in the ground. The city blamed the police for not wrapping up the crime scene so the construction crew could finish the job. The police in turn blamed the city for coming up with excuses not to venture into the worst area of town. I just believed everyone wanted to forget us. Play like we didn’t exist. Seemed the so-called righteous citizens of the city were good at doing that.
I turned down Sam’s street and grimaced. The place looked worse in the rain. Broken-down trailers looked haunted in the night. Beat-up trucks or old-school cars were parked along the streets or in muddy yards. A few sat under carports or in weed-free driveways but those were few and far between.
I hadn’t planned on bringing Sam home. My plan was to take her to my place. Keep her safe there. But after what almost happened between us, I decided her home was the safest place for her. From me. I would just shack up on her couch, watch over her from there.
Halfway down her street, I slowed down. My dad’s house was on the left. It was dark, not one light on. His old white truck sat in the driveway, looking as pristine in the rain as I remembered it.
Through the rain I could tell he had been working in the yard. The grass was cut, the edges weeded. I imag
ined him out there during the day, a hoe in one hand. A glass of whiskey or vodka in the other.
“I see him every now and then.”
I glanced over at Sam, surprised she was talking to me. For some reason, I thought she would give me the silent treatment. Thank god I was wrong.
The curious, take-no-prisoner’s look back in her eyes. Her hair was no longer messy, all evidence of my fingers gone. The waves fell over her shoulder and down her chest, brushing against the nipples that I ached to have back in my mouth. And her legs … I wanted to run my hands up them and spread them wide. Let my fingers find her pussy, delving into her wetness.
I cleared my throat and shifted positions, giving my dick some much-needed breathing room. “I haven’t seen my dad since I moved out,” I said, giving into Sam’s need for small talk. I wasn’t much for it but for Sam, I’d talk.
“So he doesn’t care that you left and don’t come around?” she asked, getting straight to the point.
I shrugged. “I don’t really care what he thinks. The man smacked any concern I had for him right out of me long ago.”
I peered through the rain at Sam’s trailer up ahead. I could see her mom’s car parked in the driveway, an older beater she’d driven as long as I could remember. A light was on in the living room and the front porch light flickered then went out. It was a sad, sorry excuse for a home.
I eased the car to a stop in front of her house and cut the engine. With a deep sigh, I jerked the keys out of the ignition and cut my eyes over at Sam, frowning.
“So why all the questions, Sam? You know what hell that man put me through.”
“He’s still your dad.”
I snorted. “He’s not my dad. He’s a loser. A monster. One that loves a bottle more than any person alive.” Shit. As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I regretted them. I had just described myself perfectly. It left me cold.
Regret flirted across Sam’s face. “Walker, I never should have called you that all those years ago,” she said, referring to the night we were teenagers, when I almost beat a man to death for attacking her.
I turned in the seat to face her, wishing she was back in my lap again. “You had every right to, Sam, but I’m not sorry. I would take that guy down again for hurting you. And I sure as hell would kiss you again. The truth is I might have been arrested that night but it was the best fucking night of my life. Until now.”
Sam sucked in a lungful of air. I wanted to reach across the seat and grab her. Demand that she straddle me again. But I didn’t. I stayed still, the truth hitting me. I wasn’t good enough for her. I never would be. I had nothing to offer. Not a future, because I didn’t have one. Not love, because I’d never known it. Not lust, because I was dangerous to someone as innocent as her. The only thing I had to offer was my soul and it was a black one.
Keeping my eyes off of Sam, I popped open my door. A second later, I was in the rain, drenched to the core. My t-shirt stuck to my body, letting the world see what eight hours of slinging a hammer did to muscles.
I looked over the top of my car. Sam was standing on the other side, soaked. Rain washed over her, flattening her hair against her head and forcing strands into her eyes.
I walked around the front end of my car, my strides angry, my boots kicking up water. I was an asshole. I had to remember that. Sam had told me that once and so had many other people including my dad. And what did assholes do? They took. They used. They abused and walked away.
Time I lived up to my reputation.
I grabbed her hand and started for the trailer, walking with purpose. Once we got inside, warmth and humidity hit us, not much better than outside. The floor beneath me complained under my heavy boots, the wood hollow and cushiony as I walked into the house. The construction worker in me wondered how rotten the boards were. How much time they had before they gave completely.
Sam and her family had lived in rubble forever. I had too for most of my life. I should have been used to seeing the sorry state of her living conditions but it still pissed me off, even after all this time.
I took a big whiff of cigarette smoke, memories of my own fight with nicotine coming back to haunt me. I could almost taste the cigarette against my lips and feel it in my lungs as I took a big drag of air.
Somewhere in the back of the house, a radio played, the song slow and sad. I glanced into the dark kitchen, seeing a broken kitchen table, one side being held up with a box. Two chairs sat empty, reminding me of sitting there and doing homework with Bent, trying to ignore his little sister.
“Walker?”
I swung around, facing Sam in the dark entranceway. “Yeah?”
She bit her lip, playing with her lip ring. I tried my damnedest to keep my eyes locked on hers.
“Um, I’m home now,” she said, looking at me like I had lost my mind. Guess I had because I didn’t want to look away from her.
“I’m staying,” I said, my voice rough, leaving no room for argument.
She flicked on a light, casting the area in a soft glow. My gaze drifted down her body, soaking up the sight of her dress sticking to her body in all the right places. A slow grin spread across my face, the ass in me loving that I could see the outline of her puckered nipples.
“You’re very sure of yourself,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest.
“Someone’s gotta be,” I retorted, my gaze dropping down to her breasts.
“Cocky much?” she shot back.
My smirk grew. “You tell me. How is my cock?”
It took her a full minute to recover, in which time I enjoyed gazing at her some more.
“You do know that my mom’s home,” she said, raising one eyebrow and nodding toward the hallway, ignoring my question.
I leaned toward her, my mouth near her ear. “I know. I’ll sleep on the couch. What did you think? That I would fuck your brains out with your mom in the same house? Jeez, Sam.”
Her hair tickled my mouth and nose, sending desire through me. I pulled away, my smile growing when I saw the shock on her face. Her cheeks were pink and she appeared to be holding her breath. Time to make her come alive some more.
I shrugged, nonchalantly. “But I could sneak into your room later, after her mom goes to sleep. Just say the word and I’ll be there. Right between your legs, sweetheart.”
Sam let out the breath she had been holding. I saw her back stiffen, the pink in her cheeks turning to red.
Good. I enjoyed this little game we were playing. The demented part of me wanted to make her uncomfortable. Make her run and hide. I was the big bad wolf and she looked mighty tasty. But I forgot who I was dealing with. Sam Ross could play dirty too.
“Well, I guess she wouldn’t care,” Sam said, sticking her chin up with defiance. “It’s not like you would be the first guy to sleep in my bed. And you definitely won’t be the last to try to get between my legs.”
Son of a bitch! Her words knocked me back on my heels. The thought of her with another guy had my blood boiling. The monster in me growled. I knew she was a virgin but if some guy crawled into her bed or attempted to touch her, I would rip him apart. And thinking of her with someone else in the future … that screwed with my mind in a way I didn’t want to acknowledge.
I watched with rage as she gave me a sweet smile and walked away, her tight little ass swinging. A few minutes later, I was still standing in the same place, trying to control my jealousy, when I heard water running. Christ, she was in the shower. My heartbeat sped up, the anger leaving me. Just thinking of the water running down her body had me sweating. I rubbed a hand over my face and glanced around, desperate for something to take my mind off Sam.
A drink. That’s what I needed. Heaven knows, her mom had plenty of booze around. It would calm my ass down.
I headed to the kitchen, my mouth watering already, when a sultry voice stopped me.
“Well, hello, Cole Walker.”
I turned around slowly, finding Sam’s mom standing in the dark hallway. She was
wearing some kind of lacy nightgown, covered with a threadbare robe. Her blonde hair looked ratted and her mascara was smeared. In her hand was an unlit cigarette. The other held a silver lighter.
“Ms. Ross,” I said, keeping my eyes on her face. I knew she would have something low-cut on, maybe something that barely covered her tits. And I was right. As she walked toward me I saw her nightgown had a low neckline, her dark nipples visible through the sheer material.
At one time she might have been beautiful, just like Sam, but time had been rough on her. Too many men and a shitload of drugs had destroyed her body and almost her mind. She didn’t care about her kids or her well-being. She was willing to give up both for a pill or a snort of anything mind altering, just so she could escape the pain of living.
The smell of her cheap perfume choked me as she walked past, heading for the kitchen.
“Wanna drink?” she asked, her eyes coy.
“You read my mind,” I said, turning on the soles of my boots to follow her.
She smiled at me over her shoulder, her hips swaying back and forth. I knew it was all for my benefit. The woman had come onto me more times than I could count.
In the kitchen, she didn’t bother turning on a light. I watched from the doorway as she grabbed a half-empty bottle off the counter and rummaged in a tall stack of dishes for two clean glasses.
“So, you brought Sam home?” she asked, pouring some Mad Dog 20/20 into a cup.
“Yeah.”
“Can I ask why?” she asked, filling the other cup then sauntering across the kitchen and handing me the glass.
I took a swig, wincing when the cheap stuff hit my taste buds. “Why not?” I answered with a grimace.
She smiled seductively and I could see traces of Sam in her. With one arm across her middle and the other holding her glass, she took a step toward me, her hips bouncing from one side to the other.
“Because I know about you and Sam, big boy,” she said, her tone suggestive.
I swallowed and almost choked on the lingering taste of Mad Dog in my mouth. “All due respect, Ms. Ross, but there is no Sam and me,” I said, lying through my teeth. There was a Sam and me. The moment I put my cock inside her, Sam became mine.