I shook my head with disbelief. Bent was working for the same people I had run away from most of my life – law enforcement.
He shrugged as if it was no big deal. “After that they set things in motion to get me in with Tuan. It was easy, given my reputation. Now they want me buried deep until they get Morrow, the top dog.”
I peered at him closely, an uneasy feeling slithering along my skin. “So you’re still in?” I asked, wanting to strangle him. The thought of Sam being so close to this crap … it left me cold and clammy.
Bentley nodded. “I’m still in. Buried deep.”
Shit. My best friend was a snitch.
~~~~
By daybreak we were back in the Mercedes, Rollins taking us home like nothing had happened. I was still trying to wrap my mind around Bentley working for the Feds. It would take some getting used to.
The rain had turned heavier, recoating the streets in wetness and making the blacktop gleam under the raising sun. With it came the heat, hotter now that the sun was rising.
Bentley had called Sam a few minutes ago, giving her the all clear and telling her to head back to our apartment. I wanted to grab the phone out of his hand, ask her if she was okay, but I resisted. I needed to get my head on straight. There was so much I wanted to tell her. So much I needed to say.
I realized that it didn’t matter what I had done in the past or what I would do in the future. We belonged together. Sam and me. I didn’t want to waste another second of my life denying it. I may never deserve her but damn, I wanted her for all time.
I watched out the window for miles, my mind elsewhere. The soft leather of the car didn’t help my cracked rib or the bruises I would have tomorrow but it didn’t matter. I was going home. That was the important thing. I was returning home to Sam.
The Mercedes exited off the highway, slowing down. I watched as we headed toward the slums - my part of town. I had never been so happy to see rundown trailers, pawnshops, and cheap liquor stores. Every mile brought me closer to Sam. Each second closer to facing my biggest fear yet.
“You never answered my question. Yes or no?” Bent asked over his shoulder, glancing at me from the front seat.
I knew what he was asking. He wanted to know if I loved Sam.
I took a deep breath and looked deep into his eyes, seeing the kid that had been my best friend since I was twelve. We were still those two misfit boys, the ones left to navigate this world on our own. And tagging along with us was one little spitfire of a girl. The one who drove me crazy.
The woman I couldn’t live without.
“Yes,” I said, answering his question.
I loved Sam Ross.
Chapter Thirty–Nine
-Sam-
I watched out the apartment window, waiting to see a black Mercedes pull into the parking lot. The apartment was dark and quiet behind me. Lukas was gone. I chewed on my lip ring, waiting for Bentley and Walker to show up. I should be tired, going all night without sleep, but I wasn’t. I had been too worried to close my eyes.
I held the blind open with a shaky hand, watching the parking lot. Rays of the morning sunlight flooded the area despite the rain that fell softly. I pushed a loose curl of hair behind my ear, keeping my gaze locked on the street, waiting for them to show up.
A minute flew by. Then another. I grew nervous, wondering why they weren’t home yet. I started to pull my cell phone out of my pocket when a black sedan made the turn into the parking lot.
I dropped the blind and raced across the apartment. In seconds I was flying down the slick cement stairs, my Converses just flashes of black against the steps.
Rain hit me as soon as I reached the bottom but I didn’t stop. I flew out into the parking lot, meeting the Mercedes as it rolled to a stop. The back door opened slowly. My heart pounded, waiting for Walker to appear. My hair and clothes were soaked, plastered to my body, but it didn’t matter. Nothing did except him.
I held my breath, frozen in place. Walker stepped out of the car, his lean but muscular body unfolding to his full towering height. His black eyes found mine through the rain, piercing my soul and seeing deep inside me.
I took a step toward him. Toward the man I loved. The man I had always loved.
Walker slammed the car door shut, his eyes on me. With purposeful strides he closed the distance between us, puddles of rain splashing over his boots. His black hair became wet in seconds, so did his shirt, sticking to his chest. As soon as he was close enough, he grabbed my arms and hauled me against his body.
“Walker,” I whispered a second before he kissed me, covering my lips with his. He grasped the sides of my head, angling his mouth over mine. Tasting me. Consuming me. Marking me as his.
I moaned and grabbed a handful of his wet shirt, feeling the hardness of his muscles against my hand. Thunder clapped overhead and the rain fell faster. The Mercedes engine hummed feet away but it didn’t matter. It was just Walker and me, together like we should be.
He deepened the kiss and tangled his hands in my hair. I grabbed the belt loop of his wet jeans and tugged him closer, needing there to be no distance between us.
“Sam, I love you,” he whispered against my mouth, his fingers warm in my hair. “I love you so damned much.”
I grasped his shirt tighter, my lips mere inches from his. “I love you too, Walker. I always have.”
His lips brushed across mine, his voice a low rumble against my mouth. “I looked in the mirror every day and saw a man that was not worthy of you. A man that was nothing. I thought I had no right to touch you, to love you. But now … that’s all I want to do. I’ve loved you forever, Samantha Ross. I was just too damned afraid to admit it. You might hate me but never stop loving me.”
“Never,” I whispered.
He took control of my mouth again, taking what he needed and giving what I wanted.
Love.
I pressed my wet body against his. I wanted him to scoop me up and carry me inside, but instead I ended the kiss. I had to ask him something.
“What about that word?” I asked, gazing up at Walker. “Amazing?”
His smile disappeared and his eyes became guarded. His hands left my hair and dropped to my hips, keeping me next to him. I saw him swallow hard. I regretted the question instantly, but he took a deep breath and took away my fear.
“Yes, amazing. Having kids with you would be amazing, Sam.”
I smiled, rain dripping off my nose. “In the future?”
Walker chuckled. “Yes, in the future.” He lowered his head again, this time to whisper in my ear. “Definitely.”
“Definitely,” I whispered.
“God, I love you, Sam,” Walker whispered, grabbing the sides of my face and bringing his mouth down to mine.
“I love you too, Walker.”
I started to kiss him but paused, his eyes catching my attention. In their dark depths, I could see him. Not the monster. Not the beast. Not the little kid that had been lost.
Just Cole Walker.
And I knew he was home at last.
Epilogue
-Walker-
One Year Later
I stood in our bedroom and surveyed the mess I just made. There were rose petals everywhere. On our bed. Our dresser. The floor. I had covered the room in them.
All for Sam.
I had done what my dad never did for my mother. I gave the woman I loved more roses than she could count, filling our room with them. Telling her with mauve-colored blooms just how much she meant to me.
I lit a candle, careful not to blow out the flame when a ragged breath escaped me. I was scared to death. A mess. A bundle of fuckin’ nerves. I had never been this nervous before in my entire life. Only Sam could cause this kind of feeling in me.
I got out of classes early today, skipping my last one to do this. Bentley had helped me set it all up then took off, but not before slapping me on the back and telling me good luck. I had asked his approval on this and he gave it to me with a warning. ??
?Hurt her and I’ll kill you.”
I scowled, thinking of Sam hurt. My response to Bentley had been sure and quick, spoken from my soul. “If I hurt her, Bent, I’ll hand you the damn weapon because I don’t want to live knowing I hurt her.”
Bentley was happy after hearing that.
I took a deep shuddering breath and checked my watch. Sam should be home from school any minute. I could almost picture her, walking out of the building, the sun on her face, smiling with her friends and talking about an upcoming test. She was in her second semester of college and loving every minute of it. Her plan? To be a grade school teacher in the low-income area of town. She wanted to help underprivileged kids, just like her and I had been. She hoped to give them what she never had – love and affection. A person who cared. And god, did I love her more for it. The woman never ceased to amaze me. Every day I watched her. I lived with her. I slept with her and woke up beside her. And I loved her more each day.
Life had never been better. For the first time in my life, I was content. Something had filled my heart that I had never experienced before. Not love, because I think it had always been there, lurking around the edges, waiting for Sam. Not desire because, hell, I had always had that for her. No, it was something else.
It was happiness.
For the first time in my life, I was happy.
And Sam was too.
Two days after I told Sam I loved her, she tracked down her mom. Ms. Ross had woken up in a motel room, unable to remember how she got there or how long she had been gone. She found used condoms and two passed-out strangers beside her. That’s when Sam’s mom hit rock bottom. She cleaned herself up, caught a taxi, and checked herself into a state-run hospital for addicts. Her mom was now on a road to recovery. She had a long way to go, but Sam was slowly getting back the mother she once knew from so long ago, one day at a time.
Me? I hadn’t touched a bottle in a year. The demons inside me didn’t run my life anymore. I filled my time working and going to school. At night I made love to Sam, never able to get enough of her body. During the day I counted the seconds, waiting until I could see her again. Each moment away from her was torture. Each second with her was heaven.
I glanced around our bedroom again, seeing the bed we made love in. Her clothes in my closet. My life as close to perfect as it could be.
There was just one thing missing.
“Walker? Are you home?” I heard Sam shout a second before the front door closed.
I turned, facing the open doorway of our bedroom. Stuffing my hands in my pockets, I waited, feeling excitement, terror, nervousness and love all at once. My fingers brushed against the little velvet box in my pocket as I said a prayer, hoping I would hear the one word that would change my life forever.
Yes.
The following is an excerpt from Paige Weaver's first book, Promise Me Darkness.
Chapter One
This is the story of the end of life as I knew it. We thought the world would continue as it always had. Society would stay the same. People would stay the same. We were wrong. In a heartbeat, the world changed. I changed.
“I can’t believe you talked me into this!”
An Eminem song blared loudly from speakers as I followed my best friend through the smoky bar. Men covered in tattoos stood shoulder to shoulder with women in barely–there clothing. As for me, I stuck out like a sore thumb in my light pink sundress and matching sandals.
“Relax, Maddie. I just wanted to check the place out,” Eva said, bopping her head to the music as we walked through the crowd. I wasn’t sure if she noticed the nasty stares we were getting or was just oblivious to them. Knowing Eva, she just didn’t care.
I stuck close behind her, afraid of being separated among these people. Eva and I had been to many of the bars near our college and seen some crazy things but this place was just plain scary. Talk about a hole in the wall. The smoke was thick and suffocating. The music was the kind your mama wouldn’t want you listening to — loud and full of every damn cuss word that existed. Most of the bar patrons looked either like convicts or members of a local motorcycle gang. I bet a few even had switchblades hidden somewhere on them. Two college girls definitely didn’t belong in here.
“TABLE!” Eva squealed when she saw two empty chairs. Pulling on my hand, she charged forward, bumping into a couple of leather–clad men who scowled at us.
At least the seats were in the corner. Maybe no one will notice us here. Eva could have her fun and then we could leave. Hopefully, in one piece.
“WOOO HOOO!” Eva shrieked as one of her favorite rap songs started blasting from the speakers. It earned us a few more dirty looks.
To my dismay, she started rapping along with the song. The girl couldn’t sing worth a darn but I had to give her credit for trying. I hugged my purse closer to my body and glared at her. She was so drawing attention to us! I hushed her but this was Eva we were talking about; there was no hushing her.
Out of nowhere a waitress appeared next to our table. “You girls want anything?” she asked with a bored expression. Her blond hair was stringy, her tank top cut too low, and her tiny shorts didn’t cover her butt. She had about an inch of makeup on and it was starting to cake in her wrinkles.
“Two shots of whiskey,” Eva yelled over the music.
The waitress nodded and walked away, her shorts trying so hard to cover her behind.
“I don’t drink, Eva, you know that!” I leaned over to shout.
Eva waved me off as she went back to singing. I cringed as she rapped about sex and someone getting shot.
We were so different. She was the exact opposite of me. Spontaneous and unpredictable, Eva was a true wild child who wasn’t afraid of anything. Some people found it amazing that we were friends but I’ve known her since the first grade — fifteen long years now. We had been through thick and thin together. There was no separating us. That’s why I had agreed to come to this dive in the first place. Needless to say, she owed me big time.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw some men staring at us, practically drooling. “Those guys are gawking,” I said.
“Wooo, baby, come to mama!” Eva growled dramatically as she studied them.
I rolled my eyes at her version of a sexy purr. She loved bad boys and these men fit the bill perfectly. They were cute if you liked the tattooed, muscular, badass type of man. I didn’t. My type was more the khaki wearing, BMW driving, tattoo–free gentleman.
The men were forgotten as the waitress appeared and delivered our shots. She took our money and stalked off, not thanking us for the tip or looking our way again. The customer service in here rocks.
I picked up the small glass and studied it closely. It was dirty and whatever was in it smelled awful.
“I’m not drinking this,” I said, sitting it back down with revulsion.
“You’ve got to. It’s bad luck if you don’t.”
I eyed Eva with skepticism. “That’s not true and you know it.”
“Okay, well, just drink it for me. You need to relaaaax.”
I picked up the dirty glass and sighed. The things I did for a friend.
“Okay, on three. One, two, THREE!” Eva said, smacking the table with each count.
I tossed back the drink quickly. Fire raced – no, scorched – down my throat. My eyes watered, making it hard to see. I squeezed them shut, feeling the burn as the whiskey traveled from my throat to my stomach. Oh, shit! That was terrible!
Eva started giggling as she watched me. “Another!” she laughed, pushing the second glass my way.
“What? No freakin’ way! That was awful!” I shuddered in disgust.
“I bought it for you. Drink up. You need it.”
I knew Eva would win this argument so I threw back the drink. My throat instantly felt as if someone dropped a lighted match down it.
“I love this song! Let’s dance.”
She grabbed my hand and pulled me out onto the dance floor before I could protest or recover f
rom the drink.
There were only a couple of people dancing but Eva didn’t care. She started moving to the bass, really getting into the music. By now, my muscles were starting to relax thanks to the alcohol. Moving my hips to the pounding beat, I began dancing.
By the second song, we were having a good time. Eva turned to shake her butt at me, sending me into fits of laughter. We started rubbing against each other, grinding to the music and acting silly.
After the song ended, I noticed we had gathered an audience. Many of the rough looking men were now standing on the sidelines, watching us. I nervously scanned the crowd, afraid we were over our heads here. These men looked at us like we were their dinner and they were starving.
I was about to tell Eva that we should leave when someone caught my attention. He was at a pool table in the back, lining up to take a shot with his cue stick. A voluptuous blonde was rubbing up against him like a bitch in heat. She wore a short black skirt, plunging neckline blouse, and five–inch stilettos. Her hands were all over him.
I watched as he took the shot and straightened up to survey the table. Turning to the woman, he grabbed her by the waist and pulled her closer.
I sucked in a breath when I saw his profile. His ball cap was pulled low and unruly brown hair peeked out from the edges. His broad shoulders were outlined beneath a black shirt and well–worn jeans fit his long, muscular legs perfectly.
I would recognize him anywhere.
“Who’s that hottie?” Eva asked when she noticed me staring.
“It’s Ry…”
She beat me to it. “Holy shit! It’s Ryder!”
I felt my heart rate go spiraling out of control as I watched him laugh at something the blonde said. When he leaned over to whisper in her ear, I couldn’t look away.
Ryder Delaney was a legend around here. The women couldn’t keep their hands off him and the men were scared to death of him. He was good–looking and dangerous. A little bit bad and a whole lot sexy. And just like Eva, he was wild and liked to live life to the fullest (sometimes a little too much). He had no rules and did what or who he wanted. Apparently, he was working on his latest who — the blonde wrapped around him.