Dedication
If you sigh for Kai, this book is for you.
With special love to two of my best friends,
and Kaidan’s original fangirls,
Courtney Fetchko and Kelley Vitollo (Nyrae Dawn).
Contents
Dedication
Author’s Note
Prologue
PART ONE Sweet Evil
CHAPTER ONE Before
CHAPTER TWO Strange Girl
CHAPTER THREE More Confused Than Ever
CHAPTER FOUR Meeting Daddy Dearest
CHAPTER FIVE Road Trip with a Nun
CHAPTER SIX Pears and Oranges
CHAPTER SEVEN Sold
CHAPTER EIGHT A New Craving
CHAPTER NINE First Time for Everything
CHAPTER TEN One-Way Flight
CHAPTER ELEVEN Off to Work I Go
CHAPTER TWELVE Triangle Thing
CHAPTER THIRTEEN Good Witch, Bad Ape
CHAPTER FOURTEEN Anna’s Test
CHAPTER FIFTEEN New Year’s Day in the Big Apple
CHAPTER SIXTEEN Postcard
PART TWO Sweet Peril
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN Los Angeles
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN Partying with Pharzuph
CHAPTER NINETEEN The Chill of Winter
CHAPTER TWENTY Rage
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE Reunited
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO Learning the Hard Way
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE Alive
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR Let Me Kiss You
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE Saving Z
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX Water and Wrath
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN No Good-Byes
PART THREE Sweet Reckoning
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT Most Important Job
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE Not Like This
CHAPTER THIRTY Blake and the Twins
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE Till Death
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO Finally
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE Celebration Above
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR Unexpected
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE One-Track Mind
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX Heartwarming
CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN Ready or Not
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT Anna’s Vice
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE It’s Time
CHAPTER FORTY Good
Duke Names and Job Descriptions Index
Glossary
Acknowledgments
Excerpt from The Great Hunt Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Back Ads
About the Author
Books by Wendy Higgins
Credits
Copyright
About the Publisher
Author’s Note
This is a companion novel to the Sweet Evil trilogy—it is parts of the story told from Kaidan Rowe’s point of view. It’s not meant to be a stand-alone novel; however, I’ve tried to incorporate as much as possible from the original books.
For those of you who read the first three, I should warn you that being in Kaidan’s head is far different from being in Anna’s. His thoughts are darker and rougher and, well . . . naughtier. Keep in mind, when the story begins, Anna has just turned sixteen and Kaidan is seventeen. By the last third of the story, Anna is eighteen and Kai is nineteen, so the crossover from young adult to adult was the natural progression of their story.
Happy reading, sweeties. Kai awaits.
PROLOGUE
“I wanna hate every part of you in me . . .
You say that I’m privileged but my gift is my curse.”
—“Bite My Tongue” by You Me At Six
“Sit down, son.”
Young Kaidan did as his father asked, obediently sitting in the oversized leather chair beside him in the sitting room of their London home. Kai’s stomach buzzed with nervousness. He rarely had his father’s full attention, so he felt heavy and exposed under his intense stare. Kaidan savored Pharzuph’s eyes on him, and for a moment let himself pretend this meeting was something more than business—he let himself imagine his father’s smile was born of concern for him, rather than the glee of malice. He wanted to tap out a beat on his leg to soothe himself, but his father couldn’t stand fidgeting of any kind so he remained still.
Pharzuph looked over his young son, whose hair was longer than the other boys’ at school, and had unruly curls at the edges. Kai wore the same white shirt and navy trousers as his peers, but he still managed to stand out through his musical talents and the way he carried himself. The way he talked with blasé confidence and walked in an unhurried stride—all of this had been practiced and orchestrated by the handsome man sitting before him.
“You’re eleven now. Time to begin your training.”
Kaidan nodded. He’d known this day was coming. He’d watched last year as his friends, the twins Marna and Ginger, faced their training. He’d been frightened by the bitterness that overtook Ginger, and the sadness that seemed to drape Marna. They were no longer his mates in the carefree way of children. Even their eyes were different: calculating and searching.
“You know you’re the son of Lust.”
“Yes, Father.” Kai had been made to watch his father at work for some time now. He’d been given magazines and films to peruse long before he understood any of it.
“Now, tell me the sins we deal with as Dukes and Nephilim.”
Kaidan pushed the hair from his eyes and rattled off the seven deadly sins in a shaking voice. “Lust, greed, sloth and gluttony, murder, pride, wrath, and envy. The other sins we promote are hatred, substance abuse, lies, theft, and adultery.” He placed his hands in his lap.
“Don’t sit like that,” his father snapped. “You look too proper. Put your hands on the arms of the chair like you own the place.”
Kaidan quickly moved his hands to the arms of the chair.
“Why do you suppose the sins are called ‘deadly’? Aside from the obvious. Murder.”
Kaidan swallowed hard. He didn’t know how to answer, and he was afraid of being whacked across the head, just as he had been when his favorite nanny was sacked and his father caught him crying.
Pharzuph leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees and twining his fingers. “Listen well, Kaidan. Because this is the most important lesson of all. This is our purpose—the purpose of all demons and Nephilim. The sins are called deadly because they slowly kill one’s spirit.” His blue eyes began to glisten with fervent zeal as he went on. “Over time, something as simple as casual sex or nicking items from a shop can soon become obsessions. Humans need more. They are stupid beings, Kaidan. They never have enough. More thrills, more attention. They are selfish creatures. Never satisfied. It is our job to help them on their journey to ruin. Do you understand?”
Kaidan nodded. Disdain for humans had been ingrained in him from the beginning.
“They were chosen by the Maker to live lives of freedom here on earth while angels such as myself were banished for wanting a simple bit more.” His father’s eyes flashed red. “He chose them—this ungrateful race—to flaunt His blessings on, while we were left to rot in hell. But we’ve found a way to punish Him. . . .” Pharzuph smiled wickedly. “Every day we turn His beloved earthlings against Him. We cause them to focus on their bodies and their urges, their wants and desires. We give them something tangible to hold on to, but just for a moment. Because the sins are fleeting satisfactions.”
Kaidan nodded, shocked that the humans could be so easily fooled. So blind. “They deserve it if they’re that stupid,” Kai said, and his father gave a laugh of pride.
“Indeed, son. They deserve every moment of pain they get. The Maker tells them to be careful—he dangles a bit of fun in their faces, but tells them they cannot have it. But we are here to tell humans to take what they want. And when they have the
nerve to cry over the consequences—to pout and curse the world—we laugh. Because the Maker is hurting.”
“Why?” Kaidan breathed. “If they’re all so horrible, why does it hurt Him?”
Pharzuph’s eyes narrowed into a sneer. “Because He loves them. Because He’s promised them free will, which means he will not interfere in their idiotic choices. It’s pathetic.” Now Pharzuph chuckled. “He’s backed himself into a corner and can only watch as His creation destroys itself . . . with our help. And never forget—as much as He loves them, he loathes our kind. Never. Forget. His unworthy humans are all born with a chance at reaching the heavenly realm. You were not born with that chance.”
Kaidan pressed his hands hard against the chair arms to keep from trembling. He hated when his father spoke of hell—that place of dimness where joy could not be had—the place he was destined to go when he died.
At a knock on the house door, Pharzuph smiled. “Now you understand the why of our job. It’s time to learn the how. Our helpers have arrived. Are you ready, Kaidan?”
The young Neph could not speak. He could only nod. He’d spent the last year mentally preparing himself for this and wanted to make his father proud.
“Very well,” said his father. “You’re going to love your job, son. I daresay it’s the best of the lot.” He leaned forward and grinned at Kaidan. “You’ve got all the makings of a superb Neph. You will be a powerful force. You will bring people to their knees with the desire they feel for you, and they will spend the rest of their lives wishing for another touch, searching for another man like you. But there is only one Kaidan Rowe, and you will be like smoke. Make-believe. They cannot hold you, because there is no one like you who exists in their world.”
Kaidan’s heart pounded in the wake of his father’s words. Then he heard several sets of footsteps coming down the hall toward their sitting room—toward him. He gripped the chair’s arms tighter and set his face in a bored expression to hide the fear and excitement exploding through him like indecipherable lyrics. It was time to set himself apart from the other boys. There was no room in his life for guilt or humanistic morals. He was born for this. He was determined to embrace it and finally earn his father’s approval, despite the sourness rising up in his throat.
Pharzuph leaned back in his chair, lifting an ankle across his knee, staring darkly at Kaidan. A knock sounded on the sitting room door and his father’s lips rose in a wicked grin. “And now, son, the fun begins.”
PART ONE
Sweet Evil
“Break Me” by Kaidan Rowe
I can see you, see you, see you, seeking me out.
You can sense me, sense me, and it’s freaking you out.
I make you thirsty, hungry, but you can’t stay away.
Your eyes are on my body ’cause you want it my way.
Your mind and soul are screaming,
Saying RUN from the danger.
You know that something ain’t right
But you’re a bee to my nectar.
Your mind and soul are screaming,
Warning, “He’s gonna break us,”
But your body is begging me
To feed your emptiness. . . .
CHORUS:
I want those eyes to push me
And those hands to pull me,
Need those hips to break me,
Baby, break me, break me.
It’s gonna hurt tomorrow
When you’re sayonara,
But for now, for now, baby, break me,
Break me.
You ignored all the signs
From your heart and your mind
Now your body is spent,
Baby, broken, broken.
You had a taste of the good life,
Sweet and salt from the high dive.
Now your tongue is left craving.
Baby, craving, craving.
You and me, we were doomed.
Now you’re licking your wounds.
And I’m gone, baby, gone
On the winds of the dawn.
CHORUS
CHAPTER ONE
Before
“Like a big bad wolf I’m born to be bad and bad to the bone.
If you fall for me I’m only gonna tear you apart.”
—“Break Your Heart” by Taio Cruz
“I’m never gonna fall, but I’m never hard to catch . . .
My heart will never break, I’m just here to break a sweat.”
—“Casual Sex” by My Darkest Days
I’m the last of the band to walk into the party after our gig. I feel the eyes on me before I see them—the energy of auras blasting orange and red—excited whispers of “Oh my God, it’s Kaidan Rowe” carried along sublime waves of music at high wattage. Guardian angels float above their charges, wary when they see me.
I take my time entering the room behind our lead singer, Michael, who makes a grand entrance of throwing his arms up in the air as if to say, “These are my people!” Everyone cheers. Nobody seems to mind that he’s a cheeky bastard.
I’ve been in America less than a year this March and not much has changed from when I lived in London. My life is still a blur of drums, sex, and food—the Kaifecta—the only things worth living for in this fucked-up world.
My fingers are in the pockets of my black denim jeans and the front of my hair covers one of my eyes, but I can still see through the strands of brown. In one quick moment I scan the room and find three girls from the gig with red-hot auras, eyes glued to me. In half a minute I’m able to gather all I need from their auras, their body language, and the whispered conversations they’re having, which I hear clearly with my Nephilim senses.
“I am all over that. . . .”
“. . . heard he’s amazing . . .”
“. . . probably a jerk. He’s way too hot. . . .”
That last one is far more innocent than the others, and she is the one I choose. A cute brunette. I send her a nod. When she stares and slowly blushes, I look away. Then I turn and follow my mates into the kitchen for a drink.
The first seed has been planted. She will pursue.
In the kitchen a girl with short blond hair laughs at something some bloke is saying. He’s the nice guy, comedian type, wearing an oversized T-shirt. The moment I walk in, her attention wavers to me and her happy yellow aura turns to a fog of surprise, a flame of orange excitement, and then an uprising of red. The bloke tries to get her attention back, but I’ve friend-zoned him. Poor guy. I do feel bad for the ones who have to try so hard. If only they’d act like the sexual beings they are.
Any bloke who seems not to think about sex all day and night is a right liar. Or he’s attempting to train his mind for sainthood, which is idiotic.
Trust me on this.
When the blond chick turns to grab her drink, sending a fluttery-eyed glance my direction, the seemingly nice guy ogles her arse, as he should, and his aura goes thick as red mud. When she turns to him again, he quickly retrains his face into the quirky smile.
I know all the tricks. Don’t bother with the polite, shy bit. It’s not what most birds go for—though I have had to put on the witty, good-guy act to win over a few. I’m willing to play whatever role will put them in their comfort zone—their ease leads to their nakedness. And nakedness is my comfort zone. It is what I seek.
Something soft brushes against my arm, and I look down to see the brunette from the other room sliding purposely against me as she edges through the crowd toward the drink counter. Our eyes meet and I give her a smile. She tucks her hair behind her ear and glances down before looking back up at me.
“Sorry,” she says. “I’m just . . .” She points to the drinks on the other side of me.
“May I get you something?” I ask.
She stares for a moment, as if my voice and accent were unexpected. Her chest is pressed against my upper abs, and the crowd jostles us together. A cloud of red surrounds her, and I open my senses to let in the peachy scent of her pheromon
es.
Right. That’ll do. I’m ready to shag her. Thankfully I’m a pro at this next bit. Getting someone into bed is an art. A dance. It’s crucial not to misread her.
Without asking, I whisk her cup from her hand and turn to make a fresh drink. In moments I hand her a full glass, ice clinking.
“I hope rum and Coke is all right?” I already know it is because I smelled the remnants of her drink with my supernatural senses.
Her eyes go wide. “That’s what I was drinking!” Her smile is huge, as if this is a sign that I am her Mr. Right.
“Brilliant. What’s your name, then?”
“Brittany. And you’re Kayden, right?”
I smile. Nobody can seem to spell or pronounce my name. I’m used to this. “Close, luv. It’s Kaidan.”
“Oh, sorry.” She tries my name out the right way, Ky-den.
“Sounds lovely when you say it.” Taking her by the elbow, I gently lead her away from the crowded kitchen. “Were you at the show?” She was. I saw her.
“Yes. Ohmigawd, it was so good. You guys rock.”
“Ah, thanks. Mind if we go out back? It’s hard to hear you.” I’m already opening the back door and she gladly exits. Her aura pushes outward when I touch her waist and lead her away from the smokers outside. We find a wooden bench swing to sit on. It’s dark out, and the light from the back porch is now dim.
We glide back and forth. Her aura is jittery and I need to relax her.
“Are you in school?” I ask, though I don’t care.
“Yeah. It’s my first year at Georgia Tech. You?”
I shake my head. “No college for me.” I’m going to be what they call a senior in high school, but she doesn’t need to know that bit.
“Not to be rude, but you’re nicer than I thought you’d be,” she says. “Most good-looking guys are . . .”
“Pricks?” I supply.
She nods and takes another drink. Her aura is a nervous gray as she asks, “Do you . . . um . . . have a girlfriend?”
Bingo.
“No,” I say sadly. “I’m not the settling-down type.”
This shouldn’t make her happy, but it does. I see it in the way she bites her lip against a smile. Her aura is excited. “I think everyone’s the settling-down type eventually. You just have to find the right person.”