Chapter 13
The water felt gooey. With every kick, his feet felt like they were moving in slow motion. His heart was pounding, and he felt exhausted. He inhaled heavily but was still short of breath. Finally, Alex took hold of the lane separator. He had to rest. His performance was unsatisfactory. It would have been pretty obvious to him even if he hadn’t noticed how worried the coach looked.
Eric was swimming effortlessly with long pulls. He stopped by Alex and put his hand on Alex’s shoulder. “What’s wrong? You’re swimming like an old grandma or something,” he said, clearly confused by Alex’s slow lap times.
“Everything’s okay,” Alex tried to convince his teammate, but he couldn’t come up with a reasonable explanation for his slowness.
“Dude. You need to be at least two or three seconds faster to get a scholarship to Eastwood or any other decent college,” Eric said, like Alex didn’t know it already.
“I know! I know,” Alex said. He put on his swimming goggles, pushed off from the wall, and swam as fast he could. His efforts felt weak, but he had to try.
What Liam had told him bothered him a lot. Rosa was a sweet girl, but Alex wasn’t sure how long she could keep her knowledge of Liam’s sexuality to herself. The hell that would break loose if Rick got confirmation of his suspicion! Alex was annoyed that he couldn’t talk about this with anybody.
“One more lap, and then hit the showers,” Coach Hanson yelled from the poolside and looked at Alex. “You can stay. I want to talk with you,” he added.
The rest of the team finished their lap and left. Alex pushed himself out of the pool and sat on the stand, waiting for the lecture.
“The athletic departments at most colleges will make their decisions very soon. With your current performance, I don’t believe you’ll get a scholarship,” Coach Hanson said.
To Alex’s surprise, the coach didn’t sound angry at all. The only thing in Hanson’s voice was concern. All these years, Alex had assumed that the coach couldn’t care less about the future of his students as long as he got paid.
“Is there something wrong? Is everything okay at home?” the coach asked hesitantly. He knew Paul Wesley, and he also knew that he had hit Alex’s mother when Alex was a baby.
Alex sighed and thought for a long time. Honestly, he didn’t know what the problem was with his swimming. The harder he tried, the worse it got.
“Everything is okay,” Alex said finally. “Maybe the scholarship thing is just too much pressure.”
“You can always talk to me if something is bothering you. You know that, right?” Coach Hanson said and patted Alex on the shoulder.
“Thanks, Coach,” Alex replied. He stood and walked to the locker room. There was nothing bothering him—at least, nothing that he wanted to talk to the coach about.
He turned on the shower and let the hot water massage his tired shoulders. The water, which normally felt so good, was like a heavy cloak that tried to push him to the floor. He lowered his gaze, crossed his hands behind his neck, and stared at his toes.
He heard somebody talking in the locker room but couldn’t make out their words. Soon, Rick and Eric walked into the shower room, wrapped in their towels. Alex could see in their faces that something was wrong, and he had a fair idea of what it was.
“That guy is a fag,” Rick hissed.
“Who?” Alex asked nonchalantly, but his muscles tensed.
“Don’t play stupid, Wesley. That guy is gay, and you knew it,” Rick snorted. He walked toward Alex, and Eric followed him. “Rosa told me everything. There’s no need to lie.”
“So what?” Alex raised his voice and took a step toward Rick, who was surprised and backed up a couple of steps, almost bumping into Eric.
“Yes. Liam is gay. I’ve known it for quite a while. So what?” Alex said, looking Rick straight in his eyes.
Nobody said anything for a moment. The boys just watched each other. “So what?” Alex repeated. He was almost shouting now. “Liam is my friend, and I don’t give a shit what he is or isn’t.”
Alex’s reaction had surprised Rick, who opened his mouth to say something but couldn’t find the words. He closed his mouth and looked at Eric for support.
When it became evident that Rick was unable to say anything, Eric asked, “It doesn’t bother you to be friends with him, even though you know he’s a fag?”
“No, it doesn’t bother me,” Alex said with such confidence that there was no doubt he meant it.
“I think you should focus on getting a scholarship and not on some stupid … I mean…,” Rick struggled to express his thoughts. “I mean, hanging out with the f … with the gay guy is making your swimming slower.”
“Give me a break,” Alex snorted. Rick was about to say something else, but Alex cut him off. “I don’t want to hear more stupid shit from your big mouth,” he said. Everything about him told Rick and Eric that they should leave now.
“Fine,” Rick growled, and they left Alex alone in the shower room. “I hope Alex isn’t staring at our butts,” Rick said, loudly enough for Alex to hear.
“Whatever,” Alex muttered and went back to washing his hair.
He spent at least fifteen minutes under the running water, mostly to make sure that Rick and Eric had already left the swimming hall before he went into the locker room. He had no interest in seeing either of them right now, nor could he understand their reaction. Liam had never done anything to harm them.
The first surprise awaited him when he went to the rack to get his towel and swimming trunks. They were nowhere to be found. The second surprise was even less pleasant. The door to the locker room was locked.
“Goddamn Rick,” Alex swore. He walked toward the pool area, hoping to find Coach Hanson or somebody with a key. He heard some whistle blows from the hall and was optimistic that the coach of the girls’ swimming team could open the door for him.
“Shit,” Alex said, realizing that he was naked, and stopped just as he was about to enter the hall. He walked back to the locker room door and tried to pull it open one more time. No matter how hard he tried, it did not open. He was trapped naked in the shower room.
Finally, he heard the cleaning lady walking with the floor washer toward the shower room. She was close to his mother’s age and dressed in a blue uniform. He had no choice but to walk in her direction and ask for help.
“Do you have a key to the locker room?” Alex asked. The lady looked at the naked boy and smiled widely.
“Have they locked you out?” she asked.
Would I be asking if they hadn’t? Alex thought but just nodded.
She pulled the biggest lever on the washer, and it stopped buzzing. Alex followed her to the locker room door, where she took a key chain from her pocket and searched for the right key. “Here you go,” she said and returned to her washer. He opened the door and saw his swimming trunks and towel on the floor.
A black Audi was waiting in front of the swimming hall when he finally stepped out of the front doors. “Where have you been?” his mother asked from the passenger seat when he climbed into the back.
“I had a talk with Coach Hanson about scholarships after practice,” Alex said, telling the truth selectively.
His father was in the driver’s seat. “Your mother and I have decided that we should all go out for dinner since we have a free night,” he said. The next thing Alex knew, they were sitting in a restaurant.
“I propose a toast to my son, who will soon be going to Eastwood,” Mr. Wesley said after the waitress had brought his red wine.
“We are so proud of you,” Alex’s mother said, and she raised her glass. They both waited for Alex to lift his glass, which was full of Coke.
“But I haven’t gotten any scholarships yet!” Alex protested, picking up his drink.
“Such a great athlete will get one for sure,” his father said. Alex couldn’t remember the last time his father had looked at him with such pride. Maybe never.
“Whate
ver you say,” Alex muttered, so quietly that neither his father nor his mother could hear it.
By the time his cheeseburger arrived, he had lost his appetite. He spent the next thirty minutes surviving his burger. Luckily, his parents were so focused on each other that they paid no attention to him.
Tick … tick … tick …. Hopeful eyes were following the cheap plastic clock on the wall. The hour hand had moved slowly, but it was finally pointing to five. Alex’s swimming practice had finished.
By the time the hour hand reached six, the hopefulness was gone. When the clock showed fifteen past six, it was replaced by endless disappointment. Liam admitted to himself that Alex wouldn’t be coming over.
“I can’t believe my baby turns seventeen the day after tomorrow! I arranged myself a night off from work. Any requests for your birthday party?” his mother asked cheerfully, unaware of the events of his day.
Liam thought for a moment. Rosa and Jacob would likely accept an invitation from him. Sofia would surely not come. Rick had been rather reserved lately, though most of the time they ate lunch at the same table. Liam would have wanted to invite Matthew, but that was not an option.
“I don’t think I want a big party. Actually, I’ll only invite Alex,” he said finally. “And I want a big chocolate cake.” His mother smiled and headed for the kitchen.
For weeks, Liam had considered it self-evident that Alex would come to his birthday party. Turning seventeen wasn’t a major event for Liam; he had assumed that he would be hanging around with Alex on Saturday anyway. Hence, he had yet to give Alex the formal invitation.
He felt a sudden, cold rush through his body when he understood that Alex might not come to the party. Liam had never had a big gang of friends, but the idea that nobody would want to come and celebrate his birthday was humiliating. He decided to invite Alex first thing in the morning.
When the clock was at half-past six, Liam took out his sheet music and opened the cover of his electric piano. He played “The Clown” by Dmitri Kabalevsky. It was a rather easy song to play—even kids below school age could learn it. But artists at that age were seldom able to bring out the nuances in the piece. They just hit the hammers.
Liam wasn’t interested in artistic impression, either. Instead, he tried repeatedly to play the song as fast as he could—and it normally took less than half a minute to play. His fingers hit the keyboard with increasing speed, and his earphones echoed a cacophony that would have made his ears bleed under normal circumstances.
Finally, he was too tired to play anymore, and he went to bed. He considered that, in the morning, the whole school would know that he was gay and the rest of his time there would become a total nightmare. Still, the biggest thing that prevented him from sleeping was his uncertainty about why Alex hadn’t come over. Something was obviously wrong, and he rolled in his bed for a long time before he finally fell asleep. The hour hand was pointing at two.
He was extremely tired when the alarm clock went off at half-past six. He walked like a zombie through the kitchen to the bathroom, and after a surprisingly short shower, he went back to the kitchen to have some breakfast.
“Hello, sunshine. You look cheery this morning,” his mother teased.
“Have we run out of cereal again?” he asked, feeling surly.
“Yes, we have. I’ll buy more today,” she said cheerfully. She knew better than to provoke her petulant son.
“Oh, great. How is that going to help me now?” Liam snorted and slammed the cabinet door. Luckily, he found some ciabatta bread on the table and started to nibble it. After that healthy, rich breakfast, he took his bag and left for school.
He arrived well before the first class. He saw Rick and Eric standing under the big maple tree that shaded the front doors, and it looked obvious that they had been waiting for him.
“Rosa told us that you don’t play for our team,” Rick said. It took a moment for Liam to realize that Rick was referring to his being gay.
“It’s none of your business,” he blurted. He had been annoyed already when he left home, and now his annoyance was rapidly growing.
“It is our business. We don’t play on your team, and neither does Alex,” Eric said.
“We want you to leave Alex alone,” Rick said, revealing their ultimatum.
“We don’t want anybody on the team hanging out with fags,” Eric agreed, pushing Liam heavily on the chest.
Having delivered their message, the boys left before Liam had the opportunity to disagree. Rick stopped at the front door and leaned against it so that Liam couldn’t go in.
“I hope that we understand each other and that we don’t have to explain this again,” Rick said.
“Understood,” Liam said quickly. He wanted to go in. Class was about to start, and he didn’t want to be late.
“Good. Then we have an agreement,” Rick said, looking satisfied.
During the walk to history class, Liam looked at the students who passed by and studied their faces. Nobody paid any attention to him, which meant that the entire school hadn’t heard the news—at least, not yet.
He had to decide how to react to the ultimatum. It wasn’t the first time Rick had bullied him. Fortunately, this time Alex was not part of the problem—unless it was Alex who had asked Rick and Eric to intimidate him, but Liam didn’t find that likely.
Since he had already decided not to the let the jocks bully him, he decided to ignore their ultimatum, too. The more important question was whether Alex still wanted to be friends with him.
Mr. Timothy had already opened the classroom door, and most of the students were seated inside. Liam approached his usual seat next to Alex, who saw him and looked worried. Rick and Eric entered the room, watching Liam closely. Liam smiled at Alex and sat next to him, assuming that the other boys were not happy.
Liam hardly had a chance to say hello to Alex before Mr. Timothy started the lesson. The teacher emphasized that today’s topic was very important for the forthcoming exam, and the whole class began silently taking notes. Ten minutes before the end of the class, Alex raised his hand and asked if he could leave early as he had an appointment with his dentist.
“That’s fine,” Mr. Timothy said and waited until Alex had left before continuing the lecture. Liam followed Alex with his gaze as he left the class. He stopped staring at Alex’s butt only when he realized that Rick and Eric were glaring at him.
The class ended soon after, and Liam hurried into the corridor. Strong hands grabbed him from behind, and before he knew it, he had been pushed into the janitor’s closet. He heard the door lock, and the lights were switched on.
“So, didn’t you understand the agreement we just made?” Rick asked. He kneed Liam’s thigh.
“Ouch!” Liam cried and held his leg. The jocks turned on the faucet and pushed his head into the sink.
“Listen, faggot. You—will—leave—Alex—alone!” Rick shouted.
“Okay, I will. Please, stop,” Liam begged, sounding miserable as the water flowed over his hair and shirt.
The jocks looked at each other and decided that Liam had understood the message. Reluctantly, they let go of him and left the closet. Liam found some hand towels and tried to dry his hair and face. Once ready, he limped out of the closet.
“Has something happened?” Mr. Timothy asked. He saw the awkward way that Liam was walking.
“Nothing serious. I just ran into a table when I left class,” Liam lied, grateful that Mr. Timothy hadn’t noticed his wet hair. He walked toward the lockers before the teacher could engage him in further discussion.
After he had closed his locker, he looked around. He couldn’t see Rick or Eric anywhere. Assuming that Alex was still at the dentist, he took his cell phone from his pocket. He sent a text to Alex that read, “My mother is planning a birthday party for me tomorrow at 3 pm. Welcome!”
Half an hour later, he received a reply. “OK, thx.” He hoped it meant that Alex was coming.
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