Chapter Forty Two
Gus began rocking as an aside to chewing an entire hand. For the sake of politeness he used his own. Harvey’s eyeballs continued to sweat while Steve remained in a calm, trance like state, staring at the air around him as though he could see truth itself. The trio had only been subjected to half an hour of regulations but the cracks were more than showing. Spiritwind nodded to Brick, it was his turn to read. Brick accepted with the grimace of a full man being offered a Sunday roast, with gateaux for afters.
A rumble had been slowly building around the ship and had now reached an intensity that could no longer be ignored. The team’s inquisitive glances were quelled by Zarg giving a thumb’s up. It was clear that they should continue what they were doing. Brick wiggled his jaw in preparation to speak, only to be interrupted by a tap on the shoulder. Turning to enquire its purpose he found Coincidence gesturing to the screen. One of the aliens was moving. The rules could wait.
Steve rose from the sofa, battling to reconnect his mind to his voice box. The distant glaze that had coated his eyes fell away, his words fighting through defiance to be heard.
“I’ve been thinking.” Harvey and Gus could only manage a turn of the head in response. Steve was going to speak, regardless of the audience and their level of interest. “Why are we bothering to sit here surrounded by all these clocks?” Harvey tried to answer. He remembered something in the handbook about questioning time whilst in the anchor room. It was either do it a lot or not at all. His mouth had apparently seized up through boredom and thus the idea remained in his head. Gus barely dribbled a response as he realised his hand was far harder to remove from his mouth than place there. Steve continued. “We’ve sat and listened to these regulations for what feels like an age, yet the clocks tell us it’s only been ten nolars. How can that be? How can our perception of time be so wrong?” The ship increased the ferocity of its shaking. Steve continued, either oblivious or without care. “I don’t think our perception is wrong. I think the clocks are wrong.” The rumble began to affect the anchor room. Harvey looked around nervously as the other two remained oblivious to the disruption; Gus was far more concerned with his hand. Back in the control room, They and Coincidence adjusted their sitting position. Zarg remained short and stable.
“I…..I….don’t think.” Harvey tried to protest. His speech was weak having only just returned. Steve continued with a growing fervour.
“If time is purely perception then why even use clocks to measure it? They can’t perceive time, they have no understanding of what time really is.” Harvey stopped trying to remember the handbook and listened to Steve. The words struck a chord. “The only way to truly measure time is through you; because that is the only way it exists. It’s a concept we move through in order to live, not a number on a box that changes at preset intervals.” Harvey nodded his head without realising. Gus was busy panicking about how little oxygen his body could squeeze past his hand, an action which demanded more oxygen to continue, and thus further the panic.
“You’ve got a point.” Harvey joined in as the ship's volatility steadily increased.
“You think?” Steve was pleased for the support. It wasn’t often his ideas were taken seriously.
“Definitely.” Harvey had been placed in the anchor room to fine tune his timekeeping. He’d been late for almost every shift since his first day as wages clerk. The only reason he wasn’t fired was nobody else was prepared to do the task. The anchor room was seen as a compromise. “I don’t understand the fuss about being on time. What is ‘on time’ anyway? Everyone judges everyone else by their own watch, but whose watch is ever right?” Gus continued to focus on his hand situation. His eyes widened as panic continued to spread. All the while the time anchor’s grip loosened as Steve and Harvey chipped away at their concept of Jefferian time. Harvey continued chiselling. “I think people get too hung up on ‘when’ it is, rather than enjoying ‘where’ you are. You’re right Steve: time is just a dimension that we pass through, a dimension that allows life to progress. The time in this room is as fictitious as the happiness we chase through fiscal displays. I realise time is a necessity, and allows us to engineer societal fluidity, but such emphasis is placed upon it I wonder if we’ve forgotten it’s merely a guide and not the intended goal.”
“We should use time as a practical device rather than a means to control our lives.” Steve interpreted Harvey’s words and spoke them, building towards a great conclusion. Harvey only nodded in response as the idea sunk in to his own mind to find a place.
The anchor didn’t know what to do next. As the input of time had decreased it had followed the recommended guidelines and shook the ship accordingly. This was supposed to alert those inside to the problem and encourage them to fix it. It had done the reverse. The anchor had continued following the recommended guidelines and shook with added fervour, to the extent Brick and Spiritwind could no longer sit comfortably. Grasping a number of ornaments protruding from the desk, the duo had to hold on tightly. They and Coincidence grasped the cushioned bench they were on with both hands while Zarg continued to reap the benefits of his stable frame. Harvey was on a philosophical roll and pushed things further.
“Time is merely the backdrop that life flows past and through. What is a darnum to time other than a series of revolutions on a clock face determined by how long it takes a rock to rotate in space? That isn’t a darnum. A darnum is a first experience, the moment you find love, the moment you lose it, it’s about joy and sadness and the knowledge we gather to take on through the rest of our lives. It’s about the people we ultimately forget, but for one moment cherish with a passion we can only express through analogy; and the people we know will be there forever. It’s the chance to fill our minds with more joyous times than sad, so that when our final darnum comes we can look back and smile. The time will be irrelevant, barely remembered, because life is about sensation and emotion, not scientific regularity.”
“Time truly is…….irrelevant.” Steve and Harvey fell back in to the sofas with a satisfied glaze across their faces. At the same time, Gus’ breathing had reached an impractical level. His body felt it could regulate the whole process far better without his conscious input and forced him to pass out. The loss of Gus’ consciousness left the anchor with only threads to hold on to, threads that could no longer sustain the Jefferians' hold over Earth’s time.
One final tantrum rocked the ship to its core, sending Team A crashing to the floor. Even the anatomically stable Zarg found himself tumbling. Brick curled up to avoid injury, the irony of kneeing himself in the mouth in the process, lost in the melee. The two amateur heroes contemplated this being the end.
Steve and Harvey remained oblivious to the commotion, transfixed by their revelations. Brick sucked on his instantly swelling lip for comfort, Spiritwind rolled around pleased he’d waited before opening any more yoghurt. They and Coincidence wondered at which point it would be morally acceptable to disappear to safety, while Zarg repented every harsh word he’d hurled at his parents. With an abruptness reserved for family members, the disruption ceased, instantly replaced by an air of calm descending on the room, coating every inch with a mellow film.
After giving the new ambience a few moments, Brick raised his head and prepared to speak. His intention was interrupted by the largest ‘TWANG’ in the history of elastic. Brick returned to his foetal position, kneeing the other side of his mouth on the way. The aural eruption was enough to alert Steve and Harvey to what they had done.
“That didn’t sound good.” Steve sat upright and considered panicking.
“I’d go as far as to say that sounded terrible.” Harvey joined Steve on the edge of concern.
“That sounded like something breaking.”
“Something like an anchor that had been holding sway over a planet's perception of time?”
“Possibly.” Steve began rocking slightly and reverted to Jefferian honour. “Who can we blame?” They both looked towards the
resting Gus. His hand had fallen from his mouth, his face offering a glance of peaceful serenity.
“He is asleep on the job.” Harvey tried to justify their plan.
“He is definitely asleep.”
“Maybe it was Gus’ fault. We don’t understand all this technical stuff.” Harvey was kidding nobody
“Should we wake him up?” Steve relaxed as blame moved away from his shoulders.
“Better let him rest. He’ll need the energy to explain all this when he does wake up.” Harvey settled back in to the sofa without regret. Gus continued to dream. He figured if he was unconscious he may as well have a nap.
“Anchor ship, respond.” Brick lifted his head, both sides of his lip throbbing. The control panel continued speaking to the room. Spiritwind joined his friend in staring at the speaker, Zarg remained tightly curled up. They and Coincidence dusted themselves down. Pleased they hadn’t had to disappear.
The speakers continued emitting messages. “This is Delaware Bonanza calling Anchor ship. Humans are beginning to awake. We fear the beam is losing its hold. Please confirm anchor status, over.” Brick and Spiritwind had only gestures of uncertainty to offer as the calls merged in to an endless stream of sound. “This is Custard Honeypot. Confirm humans are awaking in sector 4444. Activating evacuation procedure Flamingo.” “Delaware Bonanza, confirming agreement of evacuation procedure Flamingo.” “Mindful Hindsight here. We too have begun evacuation procedure Flamingo. Good luck everyone. See you back on Jeffery. Who could have seen such a plan failing?”
Zarg jumped up and down in frustration. “I did but you wouldn’t listen.”
“Yes you did.” Brick realised they could get away with doing nothing. That didn’t stop the follicle warrior posing a question he could barely believe he was asking. “Did we just save the world?”
“I think we did. Cake?” Spiritwind cracked open the chocolate filled splendours in celebration.
Brick turned to the room, hands on hips, looking proud. He awaited the sensation of pride to fill his chest, the neurons in his brain to reconnect in some new heroic fashion, the waves of adulation to begin inflating his ego, but there was nothing. Not even a bout of pins and needles. “Well I don’t feel any different. Shouldn’t saving the world have some impact? ”
“It feels how it feels.” They, was ready to offer a monologue of sorts. “How it feels may not be how you expected it to, but it is what it is, and as such this is how it feels to save the world.”
“Did you even say anything then?” Brick questioned while nodding in agreement.
“Heroics are a bit of an anti climax. Unless you get shot in the shoulder or have a slowly trickling wound you can mop up for dramatic effect.” Coincidence joined in as Zarg waited for any guilt to show up over his part in the plan. It seemed smugness had ambushed it.
“Or you walk away from the final battle, through the rescue services that have arrived to clean up the inferno you created, with a lady in your arms.” They added garnish to the scenario as Brick wished he’d worn his vest, and set fire to something.
“Exactly. There are very few heroes who put on a show to go with their escapades. That’s why Hugo Cortizone is the best there is.” Coincidence sighed at the mere thought of the universe’s greatest hero. Everyone ignored it, presuming it to be trapped air finding an escape.
“If I get to go back to bed then it’s no anti climax.” Brick stood proudly, wishing for a cape and a steady gust of wind to go with his imagined vest. “Each time I return to my duvet it's party time; admittedly a very quiet party with minimal goings on.”
“Shouldn’t you be considering leaving?” Fate appeared at the doorway, the rest of Team B behind him.
“Fate. We forgot to call you, but it's okay because we saved the world.” Brick held both arms aloft in a victory stance.
“I know. Congratulations, but have you considered the Jefferians will flee back to the ship now the humans are slowly awaking?” Fate made a good point, as always.
Brick looked to Spiritwind for an answer. “No we hadn’t considered that.” It was a simple and true response.
“Then you need to leave, fast.”
“Shouldn’t the Jefferians be frozen now our time is coming back?” Spiritwind picked a terrible moment for inquisitiveness. Zarg explained as they headed in to the corridor.
“We’ve had extensive training to be able to perceive your time. Plus it will take several of your minutes for your time to fully return. The anchor is meant to be removed slowly, snapping like that will leave the Earth flickering between the two states.”
“Hold on.” The inquisitiveness infected Brick. “Gordon’s outside guarding the door. Nobody can get back on board.”
“The spider?” The nods allowed Fate to continue. “He decided to leave. Didn’t want to resume his earlier argument with Karma, when he thought he should have wings and she didn’t. I don’t think he wanted to risk any more limbs on a second debate.”
“Poor Gordon; hope he’s okay.” Nobody shared Brick’s sympathy, least of all Zarg. “Well if he’s not outside we really should leave.” Fate rolled his eyes to the sky in exasperation. He was sure he’d been suggesting that for at least a minute.
Fut offered his congratulations to the duo, Irony begrudged a well done. Karma was too busy considering the weight of the statues and how they’d look in her lounge, to offer niceties. Brick and Spiritwind accepted the plaudits then turned to Zarg. Coincidence took the opportunity to speak to his brother.
“Where have you been?” Coincidence enquired as to Team B’s whereabouts.
“We were upstairs arguing whether a room we found was a 17th century pirate ship or a linen closet. How did they do?” Fate pointed at Brick and Spiritwind, who’d formed a suspicious huddle with Zarg.
“Considering they weren’t the intended saviours of the Earth I think you can relax in the knowledge you’ve got away with it. Not the most orthodox style, but it worked.” The heroic huddle broke as Brick approached the concepts.
“We’ve had a quick word, and Zarg has agreed to show us an emergency exit off the ship.” Zarg toddled off, out of the room and down the corridor. “We feel it would be best if you did your transporting trick and we meet up later. It’s easier to escape with two of us.” Nobody could find fault with such an idea.
“We can meet later at my house if you wish? Debrief and what not.” Fate tidied up the formalities.
“Excellent, party at Fate’s house. Drop your address off at ours on the way past.” Brick clapped in celebration. Fate wondered how he’d just become a host for the evening. Karma simmered. They were supposed to be having a quiet night in. The party was instantly his fault.
As Karma’s mood turned, Zarg’s voice filtered in to the room. “Quickly, this is heavy.” Everyone relocated to the corridor to find Zarg holding open a hefty wall panel. Brief ‘see you laters’ were exchanged as the concepts faded in to the air, leaving Brick and Spiritwind to scuttle down the corridor and through the opening, Zarg squeezing through behind them. As the panel closed, the ballroom elevator could be heard arriving, releasing numerous Jefferians in to the corridor. The duo had mastered the art of hero timing if nothing else.
Contents