Over the next few weeks, Nick and Stefan kept a careful schedule at Stacey’s bed side. Nick elicited Alyson’s help to coordinate. Whenever she saw that Stefan was leaving, she would send him a text message and he would drop everything and go. He should have known that he wouldn’t be able to get anything pass Stacey for too long.
“What is going on between you and Stefan?” she asked. Nick wasn’t sure how to answer. She looked so frail he definitely didn’t want to upset her. The doctors had said a bunch of stuff he didn’t understand, but what it came down to was that the leukemia was winning the fight. And he knew that if he said that he and Stefan were fighting, it would upset her.
So he tried to lie to her. “We just don’t want to tire you out, so we are taking turns.” She had always seen through his BS and so she called him on it now. “Don’t give me that. Neither one of you can look me in the eye when I ask about the other, so what gives?”
“It’s nothing to worry about Stacey May.” Nick hedged still trying not to answer her directly. And it was a sign of how sick she was that she gave up. That scared him. She drifted off to sleep but he could tell she was fighting it, that she wanted to grill him more. He kissed her forehead and left the room.
Stefan was right outside the door. Nick tried to tell him that Stacey was asking about them, but Stefan was upset that Nick was even there. “I thought I asked you to give us some privacy?”
“I’m not just going to abandon my best friend because you can’t handle the fact that we love each other.” Nick shot back.
Stefan swore at Nick and was going to walk into Stacey’s room, but Nick stopped him. “We have to come up with some reason why we aren’t together. She has noticed and is asking questions.”
Panic colored Stefan’s voice, “What did you tell her?”
“I tried to bluff my way out of if, but she fell asleep before she could press the issue. She didn’t really buy it.” Nick said.
“Well don’t worry about it, I will handle my wife.” Stefan said.
“You really don’t know her if you think that you can handle her.” Nick said.
“I’m sick of you acting like no one but you knows her.” Stefan was almost yelling now. But then they heard a crash.
They both ran into Stacey’s room to find her on the floor. Both men went to pick her up. Stefan would have argued, but she was a tangle of tubes and wires. As they were settling her in the bed, she opened her eyes. “It sounded like you two were arguing.” She said it in a breathless whisper.
Both men were afraid for her. Nick smiled and said, “Never you mind Stacey May. What are you doing getting out of that bed?” Nick began fluffing a pillow and propping her up with it.
Stefan’s face was stormy, but he didn’t say anything. As he watched the two interact with one another. He really hated the way she softened every time that Nick talked to her. He wanted to throw something at Nick’s head every time he called her Stacey May. He knew it was irrational to feel such jealousy, but the fear of losing her was choking all logical thoughts from his brain. It was best to keep quiet because if he said anything to Nick, it wouldn’t come out right and Stacey would be upset. She looked so frail.
Nick noticed the struggle that Stefan was going through and knew Stacey would soon notice it, so he grabbed her attention. “Well since you’re awake, I can tell you my good news”, Nick said forcing a cheerfulness into his voice he definitely didn’t feel.
“Good news?” Stacey asked.
“Jasmine and I are getting married.” Nick put a big bright smile on his face.
The squeak that came out of Stacey was pure joy, but she began coughing. Stefan quickly reached and gave her a sip of water. “Well I think your good news has excited our patient enough for one day. I’m sure you’ll understand if she gets some rest now.” Stefan looked at Nick and then pointedly at the door.
Nick didn’t push it. “Stacey May, you get better real soon because you have to stand up with me during the happiest moment in my life.” With that said Nick kissed her on the forehead, nodded his head to acknowledge Stefan and then walked out the door.
“What is going on between you two?” Stacey asked Stefan once they were alone.
“Nothing for you to worry about.” Stefan tried to placate her.
She drew breath to argue with Stefan, but he silenced her with a kiss. “Boys will be boys, don’t worry about us. Can I just enjoy some time with my wife?”
Stacey was worried, but didn’t have the energy to argue. But what she did need to say couldn’t wait any longer. “Stefan, I don’t have much in the way of possessions, but I do need to update my will. Can you have an attorney come by and see me? I’m assuming you have one on retainer? I’ve never had to do anything like this and I want to make sure I do it right.”
It was something he would have done in the same situation if their roles were reversed, but he couldn’t bear it. But he didn’t want her to see how much the prospect of losing her was killing him. So he just nodded his head afraid to speak past the lump in his throat. With that done, she drifted back to sleep.
He left the room so he wouldn’t disturb her. His father was standing outside the door. “Are you alright?” Dave placed a hand on his son’s shoulder. The comfort was just the last thing to send him over the edge. The tightness in Stefan’s chest had him trying to draw in a breath. He was supposed to be taking care of Stacey, but his fear was crippling him. Stefan wanted to cry but knew if he started he wouldn’t stop. Dave could see how much Stefan was struggling.
Dave said, “Why don’t we go down to the hospital chapel and say a prayer?”
The helplessness that Stefan felt made him explode, “For what? If there is a God then He certainly isn’t listening to my prayers. She’s gotten steadily worse since she’s been admitted. I finally find the woman I’m meant to share the rest of my life with and now I’m going to lose her. What kind of God would do that?”
Dave was horrified. “Son you don’t mean that!”
“Don’t tell me what I don’t mean! What has faith in God ever done for me! It’s pointless to have this discussion, it’s not like you can prove me wrong. Either way, I’m losing the love of my life in a slow agonizing death. She is everything to me and she’s not going to make it.” Stefan walked away from his father to avoid further discussion.
Dave let him go. He went to visit his wife at the extended care facility. She was having a good day. She recognized him. “Hey there handsome. What’s wrong?”
Dave treasured the times when his wife was lucid and he didn’t want to burden her, but he knew that she would want to know. “Stefan has lost his faith in God.”
“What happened?” Sophia asked concern coloring her voice.
“His wife is in the hospital with leukemia and it’s not looking good.” Dave told his wife.
For a moment Sophia looked panicked, but then she asked. “It was a small wedding and I didn’t go because it was a last minute affair?”
Dave relaxed. She really was having a good day. “Yes, that’s it exactly.”
“I like her, I’ve met her. She’s a good match for our boy. Well we will just have to pray that both of them work through this together,” Sophia held out her hands. Dave took them in his. How he missed being able to share everything with this woman. She was so good for him. If he can go through watching his wife suffer with dementia, and still have faith then so could Stefan. So he and Sophia prayed together for their son and daughter in law.