A moment of silence separated their cries for help, and then Chase began. “I’m sorry, Father. I heard this terrible news and all I could think about was myself. The work I’ve invested, the money and hope. All of it lost. But You’re a God of miracles. We can only follow where You lead. So lead us now, dear God … Lead us now. We ask this in Jesus’ name, amen.”
There wasn’t much more to say. They made last-minute plans for the morning drive to the airport and ended the call. Chase could hear Kelly in the kitchen, putting away dishes. He wondered if there were visible weights on his shoulders, or if they just felt that way.
Be with me, God. Help her understand. Keith is right. There must be something great on the other side of this mountain, or the battle wouldn’t be so fierce.
I am with you, Son … I am your strong tower.
The verse was from something Chase had read the day before. He clung to it as he walked to the kitchen.
Kelly turned around, her eyes anxious. “Well? That didn’t sound very good.”
“It isn’t.” He leaned on the refrigerator, and the old machine groaned in response. He shifted his weight away from it and made himself look into Kelly’s eyes. “We lost the Brandon Paul movie.” He didn’t wait for her questions, but rattled off everything he knew about the Fox News story and the similarities between Unlocked and the movie NTM was calling an original. Then, barely taking time for a breath, he told her about Ben Adams and the funding crisis.
Slowly she dried her hands on a nearby towel, never once even blinking as she stared at him. “Without funding, there’s no movie anyway. Isn’t that right?”
“I’m not sure which piece matters most — the NTM announcement or the realization by Ben that he could no longer invest in our film.” Chase tried to sound as positive as possible, but his voice failed him. “Either way, we have to accept the obvious. We no longer have a Brandon Paul movie.”
Chase expected Kelly to fall apart. She would start crying and rail on Chase for ever believing that God had called him and Keith to the mission field of Hollywood. Of all things. But none of that happened. Instead she straightened and for the first time in a long time, a tender smile tugged at her lips. “Everything’s going to be okay. We still have our faith.” She held her hands out to him. “We still have each other.”
He went to her, trying to figure out where she was coming from. All along she’d been doubtful of their movie ventures. So then why now was she so calm, so sure that things would work out? He pulled her close and stroked her back. “You’re not mad?” His voice was a tentative whisper. This Kelly was the one he’d fallen in love with, the one who had all but disappeared these past months.
“I’m heartbroken. But I’m not mad.” She ran her hands over the back of his head and whispered close to his ear. “This means you can stop traveling and be home with us. You tried your best, Chase. What more could God ask of you?”
Gradually, he began to realize what was happening. Kelly wasn’t mad because she thought he was giving up, wholly and completely. With this single closed door, she figured the game was over. No more movie-making, no more traveling. No more wondering whether they’d be in financial ruin a year from now. He could get a real job and they could find their way to normalcy.
He drew back, feeling the shock in his eyes as he studied her. But before he could set her straight, she brushed her fingertips against his face. “My dad called yesterday. He knows someone at the post office. Most branches are laying off, but this one’s hiring. Just a few miles from our house.” The enthusiasm in her voice was new, something she hadn’t allowed for a long time. “His friend promised to put in a good word for you. If you’re interested.”
Chase felt like he was being ripped apart, like the floor had become a deadly sea of knives. “Are you serious?” He pushed back from her, not wanting a single minute more of her pity or easy answers. “I’m not looking for a job at the post office.” He spat the words like they were laced with poison. “Keith and I are flying to LA tomorrow, where we’re taking meetings on Unlocked. Without Brandon Paul. We’re moving ahead, believing with everything we are that God will clear up the details.”
Kelly’s calm, collected veneer shattered like a cheap piece of glass. “But you just said it was finished. There’s no Brandon Paul movie, right? So that means you come home and get a real job.” Her tone grew intense, her voice louder than before. “That’s what fathers do — they provide for their families.”
“And wives support their husbands.” He scowled at her for a long moment and then rolled his eyes. “We’re not finished making movies. If God closes this door, He’ll open another one somewhere. It’s our job to find it.”
“What if the door is right here in your own house? Huh, Chase? What you’re doing scares me to death. Did you ever think about that?”
“There’s nothing to be afraid of, Kelly. I won’t let you down.” He stared at her, alternately hating her and longing for her understanding. Finally he brushed his hand in her direction. “Never mind.” He turned around and headed back to his laptop.
The headline still screamed at him from his computer screen. Brandon Paul Agrees to NTM Movie Deal.
For almost an entire minute he stared at the words as doubts began to crowd in around him. What if Kelly was right? At what point did they wave the white flag and surrender their dreams of making movies in lieu of earning a regular living? If he was honest, this news scared him too. The announcement was strange and unexpected, and for that reason maybe it was a sign. Maybe God could use him better as a mail carrier.
He felt angry tears in his eyes and he slammed his laptop shut. No! Kelly was wrong. This wasn’t a sign. It was a mountain. Nothing more, nothing less. If this were a sign to quit making movies, Keith would’ve felt that way, too, right? He would’ve said something about having a meeting, just the two of them, and deciding whether they should call it quits.
But that wasn’t how Keith felt. During their conversation he had even reminded Chase of Jeremiah 29:11. Jeremiah Productions. God knew the plans He had for them, to give them a hope and a future. If they felt led to Hollywood, convinced God wanted them to make movies that mattered, then they would follow that dream until every door was closed and locked. He would mention Kelly’s fears to Keith, but he could almost hear his friend’s response.
Trust God. We have to trust.
The Brandon Paul movie was just one door. Keith had even said they should feel excited, that the battle was only fierce because God has something better for them in the long run. So why couldn’t Kelly see that?
He clenched his fists again and released them. A mail carrier? Was she serious? He’d rather go back to Indonesia.
He needed to talk to someone — Luke or Stephanie, someone who believed in their projects. Certainly Stephanie would be furious when she saw the NTM announcement. She was an early riser who turned in each night around eight o’clock. Otherwise he’d call her right now. NTM could put Brandon in an original film, but the screenplay would have to, indeed, be original. A story about a mentally challenged boy finding freedom in music? It was almost exactly the same plot as Unlocked. NTM or not, they’d never get away with it.
Even so, he needed to talk. He thought about calling Keith back, but his friend was clearly exhausted, and they still had their early flight in the morning. He racked his brain, wondering if he could reach Luke at this hour, and then deciding against the idea of even trying. It was much later in Indiana, and Luke was a professional. They would talk at length tomorrow, Chase had no doubts. But tonight …
The idea hit him in a rush. He could call Kendall. She would know about her father’s financial trouble, and she’d have a sense of how things would go tomorrow at their first meeting. She was used to the highs and lows of Hollywood.
He pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed her number without stopping for a minute to consider whether doing so was right or wrong. She was their business partner, their teammate. They needed to talk
now more than ever.
The call almost went to her voice recorder, but at the last moment she answered. “Chase …” Her voice held compassion and understanding. “You saw the news?”
“That and the situation with your dad.”
“I know. I talked to him.” She sounded down, but not out. “I hate this part of movie-making, how quickly things can fall apart. But I know this —” Determination rang in her voice. “God is still on His throne, and He’s still working miracles. He didn’t bring us this far to let us down.”
Chase closed his eyes and breathed in deeply through his nose. This was what he needed, a confident, trusting voice on the other end assuring him that they might have lost a round, but they were still in the fight. “What’s the deal with NTM? Any ideas?”
“Some. I put a call into Brandon, but he must be out. I’ve seen a few recent paparazzi photos of him clubbing it up with Hollywood’s wild-child crowd. I’ve been meaning to talk to him about it, but we’ve played phone tag.” She exhaled. “Now this.”
“So you think …” Chase grabbed at straws, desperate for more of her positive spin on things. “You think maybe it’s all a mistake?”
“That’s possible. Brandon was dead-set on starring in Unlocked. I can’t believe he’d sell out to NTM like that. Not for any kind of money.” She went on to explain that even if NTM offered him more money for ditching the author and producers, to take their offer would be shortsighted. “We have studios lined up who will pay him more than NTM, with all of us involved. This can’t be about money.”
He nodded, grateful for any hope she could offer. “Keith and I want to press on, but I don’t know. I mean, do you think maybe God’s closing the door on all of it?”
“Not at all.” She sounded outraged by the idea. “Chase, you listen to me. You and Keith are two of the most talented producers I’ve ever come across. Combined with your talent as a director, I believe with all my being you’re about to break into this business with a vengeance. Brandon’s lucky to work with you, and I think Stephanie’s told him so.”
In the wake of her words, hope suddenly had a heartbeat again. Brandon Paul wanted to work with them. Which meant they could most likely attract other investors. A single announcement by NTM didn’t change that, no matter what the explanation. “We’ll meet for lunch tomorrow after you fly in,” she said as the conversation wound down. “Between now and then I’ll talk to Luke and Brandon, and we can figure out where things really stand.”
“Okay.” Chase felt much better. The weights on his shoulders were gone, at least for now. “God’s brought us this far, right?”
“Exactly.” There was a smile in her voice, and it was contagious.
He felt his own weary smile fall into place. “We need to believe, that’s all.”
“Right. God wins, remember that. You and Chase are God’s filmmakers. You keep on, and He’ll meet you. Seriously, Chase. You have to keep believing.”
He let her words roll around his heart for a minute, soothing the wounded edges. “Thank you.”
“We’re a team. When I’m down, you can remind me. This time it’s my turn.”
As the call ended, Chase returned to his packing. Calling Kendall had been just what he needed. She was right. Even with the disappointments from tonight, their movie-making was headed in the right direction. Ahead of them they had this week’s meetings for Unlocked and The Last Letter’s appearances at the film festivals. And there was the theatrical release. The Last Letter might be a huge box-office hit. It was all suddenly possible.
He reached the bedroom and stared at his wife. Kelly had apparently brushed her teeth in record time, because she was under the covers, softly snoring, not concerned whatsoever about the state of his heart or his confidence. Fine, he thought as he looked at her. At least I have Kendall to believe in me.
He finished packing and set his suitcase near the front door. Then he brushed his teeth, set his alarm, and turned in, careful to stay to his side of the bed so he wouldn’t wake Kelly. So he wouldn’t have to deal with her. He’d be gone before she woke up, which meant one more time of parting ways without finding common ground. One more time of leaving home feeling her disappointment like a chain around his ankles. But that couldn’t be helped. He would press on without her and when they climbed over this mountain he would spend time on his marriage. Until then, he could survive without Kelly’s support, the way he’d survived these past several months. He didn’t need her praise and encouragement.
God had given him Keith and Kendall for that.
Twenty-Five
ANDI UNDERSTOOD THERE WAS A BATTLE going on — a battle for her heart and soul. But she didn’t care. If the world was on one side and God and her faith on the other, Andi was cheering for the dizzying, intoxicating world. Everything about her life had grown more intense, more exciting, since she’d fallen for Taz. And if that meant stepping over the edge, she would do it. For now, at least. While she still had so much about life to experience, so many emotions to discover. She could always go back if things got too deep. What was the worst that could happen?
Her date with Taz to the jazz concert had been like a journey of brilliant reds and oranges, all the colors of a sunrise and sunset combined into one amazing night. They sat next to each other, the heat from the nearness of his body filling her senses. But even then, he didn’t kiss her. They talked about physical love as they walked back to her dorm, and Taz said he wasn’t a fan of free love. “Our bodies are instruments of art and love, all tied into one. If we share them too freely, we cheapen the art.”
Andi loved that, the way he saw physical love as simply one more form of art. Until that night, she’d wondered why he was waiting to kiss her, why he hadn’t acted when he was clearly taken by her, the same way she was taken by him. But after their talk on the way back to her dorm that night, she understood better. If physical love was art, then this time of waiting was a prelude, a way to heighten the beauty of whatever lay ahead.
It was the second week of May and finals were over. Andi had studied hard, and she had a good feeling about her grades. Taz hadn’t been a distraction in that sense whatsoever. She filed out of her psych class, and across the campus she spotted Cody Coleman. He was walking with a group of guys, and for a moment she stopped and watched him.
How different she might feel about her faith if God had allowed her to have a relationship with a guy like Cody. Whatever his rocky past, he was completely sold out to Christ now, and Andi guessed he always would be.
She started walking again, making sure her path wouldn’t cross his. Their friendship had fizzled, and she could live with that. She didn’t need a lecture from Cody about how she spent her time. She had Bailey for that. Also, she was in a hurry. Taz planned to make her dinner at his apartment tonight. She didn’t need an awkward conversation with Cody to make her feel guilty.
She remembered a time a few weeks ago when she’d run into him between classes. “Why so quiet?” she’d asked him. She kept her tone light, not wanting to sound like the poor victim in their friendship.
“School has me pretty busy.” He raised an eyebrow. “And you seem busy with Taz Bazzi.”
Andi had been surprised. “You know him?”
“He went to Clear Creek High. Hung out with the music types.” Cody shrugged. “Had quite a reputation with the girls.”
Something about Cody’s tone offended Andi that day. She wanted to defend Taz and his beautiful heart, his unique way of looking at life. “That doesn’t surprise me. He’s very special.”
Cody laughed. “Be careful, Andi. He had that ‘special’ thing going on back in high school too. Most of the girls figured him out pretty quick. He could say what he wanted to get his way with one of them, and then he moved on.” He let his laughter fade. “If you were my sister, I’d forbid you from seeing him. Seriously.”
If she were his sister … Andi hated the way he said that. As if she could never be good for anything other than a close frie
ndship. She wanted to scream at him and ask him what was wrong with her. What did Bailey Flanigan have that Andi didn’t? But she wouldn’t give him the chance to hurt her any more than he already had. She held her head high. “We must know different guys, then. The Taz I know is nothing like that.”
The conversation ended, and Andi hadn’t seen or heard from Cody since. But now his warning came back to her, and she was frustrated at herself for remembering it. Today was a perfect day, otherwise. The sun was out and the leaves and flowers were coming to life across campus. The temperature was already in the mid – eighties. Finals were behind her, and tonight she and Taz were going to celebrate. She didn’t need Cody or anyone else putting a damper on her excitement.
She walked back to her dorm and caught Bailey just as she was leaving. “I’m having dinner with my parents and Tim.” She beamed with happiness. “Doesn’t it feel good to have finals over?” She let out a victory cry. “And all of summer stretched out before us.”
“Yeah, it’s amazing.” Andi had been so busy with Taz and her classes that she and Bailey had grown somewhat distant. “Did you decide what you’re doing? For the summer, I mean?”
“I’ve got the Cru retreat at Lake Monroe. But after that I’m definitely going to New York next week with Tim and my mom. We’re auditioning for ensemble roles in three shows — sort of an open casting call. After that, I’m not sure. If I don’t get a part, I’ll be in Bloomington.” She set her bag down on her bed and looked at Andi, her interest genuine. “What about you?”
“I’m not going on the retreat, and I’m not going home. I know that much.” She laughed at the idea. “My parents would have me signed up as a church camp counselor in no time.” Andi realized how she sounded, but it was too late. She managed a sad smile. “You know what I mean.”