“You’re sad,” she spoke, still tracing the lines. “You’ve been sad for a very long time; since you were a child. You come from an extremely privileged life. You know where you come from, but you have no idea where you’re going. You don’t cry. You don’t share any emotion. It makes your heart cold. You don’t love, child. You don’t know how to.”
I looked over at Brooke’s face and she was biting her cheek, taking in every word.
“You hide. You hide behind everything. Including your body, which you so easily give away like it’s nothing.” The fortuneteller looked up at her with an intense stare. “You’re scared of the world because it’s done nothing, but hurt you. You don’t let anyone in… not because you’re scared they’re going to hurt you, it’s because you’re terrified they’re not going to. No one can hurt you as much as you can hurt yourself.”
Brooke roughly pulled her hand away and stood, immediately leaving.
“Fuck…” I breathed out. I pulled out my wallet and placed a twenty on the table. “Thanks.”
“The dreams… they’re going to be the end of you, if you let them,” she announced, stopping me dead in my tracks.
I didn’t turn, but I couldn’t move either.
“The girl. She brings you peace and tranquility. Which is interesting because she is nothing but chaos, but she is the quiet to your storm. Now that’s irony. Be careful, child, don’t play with fire unless you intend to get burned; that girl is nothing but flames.”
What the fuck?
“You’re not your father… one day you will realize that. You can’t save her… but she may be able to save you.”
I shook my head and left.
Not being able to hear anymore.
I found Brooke at a bar a few doors down. She was outside drinking what appeared to be a whiskey; two empty glasses sat on the table.
“Hey.”
She looked up smiling, like nothing had just happened. “Hey, I ordered you a drink, but then I drank it,” she said, laughing.
“Are you okay?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
If this is how she was going to play it… all I could do was nod. The server came back to the table and I ordered a drink, and she ordered shots.
“Bambi… I don’t think—”
“Devon, we’re on vacation, just relax!”
I nodded again.
We spent the rest of the night drinking, barely eating, and we were shitfaced.
“What time is it?” she slurred.
I looked down at my watch and had to close one eye to see. “Almost one or maybe two.”
“In the morning?”
I looked around us and it was dark. “Yeah…”
“Mmmm kay,” she replied, leaning into me and rubbing her nose against my neck. “You smell nice… like nice guy Devon. I think that’s your nickname,” she laughed and I laughed, too. It was contagious.
“I think we need to get some coffee,” I reasoned.
“Mmmm kay, but I want a pizza.”
I guess drunken Bambi didn’t care about calories.
I got two slices; she ate hers and half of mine. The coffee sobered me up pretty fast, but she was still pretty tipsy.
“I’m kind of surprised how much liquor you can take down.”
She nodded, proud of herself and had the sloppiest, but most adorable look on her face.
“I think we should go back to the hotel and do things to each other.”
I laughed. “Oh yeah?”
“Totes! I’ll go first and then you can go or vice versa… or we can do it at the same time. Unless you want to fuck and then… that’d be cool.”
“Do you have any idea what you just said?”
She nodded again with that adorable face. “Yep… let’s go.” She grabbed my hand and I followed her into a cab.
We walked into the room. She said she needed to shower. I was worried that she might fall, but I figured this wasn’t the first time she had been drunk. She could handle her own. It didn’t take long for her to appear once again in the smallest towel invented by man.
“I feel better,” she stated, laughing and sitting on the edge of the bed.
“I figured a shower would help. I’m going to take one myself.”
She nodded in a shy way that I had never seen before.
I was done fairly quickly. I put on a pair of gym shorts and found her still wrapped in a towel, sitting against the headboard.
I raised my eyebrows in confusion and she took a deep breath, raising her hand and unwrapping her towel. I swallowed the saliva that had pooled in my mouth, as I watched her spread her legs and cock her head to the side; giving me these eyes that said, “Fuck me.” Her pussy was the prettiest fucking shade of pink and her breasts would fit precisely in my hands. I wanted to suck her perfect, pink nipples and have her beg for more.
“You—”
“Don’t you want to play?”
And we’re back to this again?
“You didn’t bring me on this trip and not expect to get fucked, Devon. That’s what I do. And you know that.” She got on her hands and knees and crawled over to me, never taking her eyes off mine. She rubbed her face all over my hard dick while purring.
And that’s when I lost my shit.
“He wants to play with me,” I panted, the way I always had.
I never expected what would happen next.
He yanked my hair back and I moaned, closing my eyes and waiting for him to do what every other man does.
Always the same.
“Open your eyes. Look at me,” he ordered in a tone I didn’t recognize.
I did.
And what I saw nearly knocked me on my ass.
There was no lust.
No desire.
No want.
No need.
He looked sad for me. Disappointed and hurt. It was the first time in years that I wanted to cry.
“I’m not doing this with you. I told you that before and I meant it. I don’t want this. I want no fucking part of this. This isn’t who you are… I can’t believe we’re back to this shit. I’m not like your clients and I never will be, Bambi. Do you understand me?”
So I did the only thing that was left for me to do. I said the magic word.
“Please…” I begged him, exactly how he wanted me to.
His eyes widened, he was pissed. He jerked my head back further, leaning right toward my face. “You think that’s going to do it? Huh? You think I’m just going to lay you down and fuck you? Is that what you want? Do you want me to hurt you? Throw you over my knee and spank you like a bad little girl? Hmm…” he mocked.
“Let. Go.” I didn’t want to play anymore.
“Why? We’re just getting started.” He roughly kneaded my nipple and then slapped the side of my breast.
I didn’t make a sound.
“Isn’t this what you want?” he provoked, slapping me again.
“Spread your legs,” he ordered, pulling me back to lie on the bed and hovered over me. When I didn’t do what he wanted, he did it for me.
“Your pussy is so fucking pretty… but you know that already, don’t you?” he ridiculed.
He was trying to break me and I wasn’t going to let him. I wasn’t surrendering to him, I didn’t care what he would do or say. My pain was mine. My hurt was mine.
Not his.
I controlled my emotions.
Not him.
“You want me to touch you? Huh? You want me to lick your cunt and then fuck you with my fingers again? That’s what you want, right? You want me to fuck you? That’s what this is about… right?” He smacked my pussy over and over again, making me squirm and scream; not from pleasure, but from frustration.
“Answer me!” he sang. “Fuck, you’re wet. You love to be treated like a VIP, don’t you?” He rubbed my clit; back and forth, causing the friction that had me frantically trying to close my legs to no avail.
“Come on… pretty Bambi, let me hear yo
u come.”
I bit my cheek till I tasted blood and he lapped at my neck.
I moved my hands to touch his cock and before I even had the chance, he let go of my hair and grabbed both of my wrists, placing them securely above my head.
“Little girl…” He toyed with my feelings, just like he wanted to, as he manipulated my clit; having me breathing heavy and climaxing.
“Yeah… who controls your pussy, Bambi? Hmmm… tell me…”
My breathing became erratic and I shut my eyes. I couldn’t look at him anymore because I was breaking, falling apart right before his very eyes.
“Open your eyes, Brooke.”
It was the first time I had ever heard him call me by my name and I immediately opened my eyes at the same time that he thrust in his fingers. Aiming them right to the spot that drove me wild.
“Stop… please…” I desperately panted.
“Oh, you want me to stop now? I thought we were playing a game.” He finger fucked me faster and harder, knowing how to manipulate me.
How to control me.
“Oh, God, why are you doing this?”
“Doing what?” he asked, acting coy.
“Why are you trying to own me, Devon, what the fuck?”
“I told you… we play by my rules or we don’t play at all.”
“Ah…” I screamed out in pleasure. “Fuck… oh, God, that feels good.”
He smiled. It was big and it was bright enough to light up the entire room. “There she is... there you are… there’s my Bambi,” he praised.
My mouth dropped opened and my back arched off the bed. He kept his eyes on mine the entire time that I came all over his hand.
Her breathing was heavy and deep, like she had just ran a marathon; in a way she had. I let go of her and stepped back letting her have some space and air. Her skin was bright pink. She was slightly sweating, and her clit was so exposed that I could see the bright red nub from where I was standing. The smell of her arousal was all around me and she shined brightly with the afterglow of her orgasm.
I didn’t want to hurt her. I never wanted to cause her pain or distress, but she was right… I did want to own her. I wanted her to be mine and I knew that was the most ludicrous thought.
She was a VIP.
She is a VIP.
The more time I spent with her, the more I wanted to know her. The more I needed to know her. I hated knowing that everything the fortuneteller said was true. She proved it to herself and to me the moment we walked into the room. I couldn’t take seeing her like that. It physically made me sick knowing that men treated her like anything less than what she deserved. I reacted.
I wasn’t proud of it. It terrified me as much as it did her. I didn’t want to be my father. I didn’t want to lose control.
I realized in that moment…
I could destroy her.
And the sick thing about it…
Was that I wanted to.
Brooke didn’t talk to me or look at me before making her way to the other bed last night. We slept in different beds and she barely acknowledged me in the morning. We ate breakfast in silence and boarded the plane the same way. We were in a cab on our way to Madam’s condo.
“Is this how it’s going to be?” I asked, annoyed that she was doing this again.
She shrugged, maintaining her neutral stare out the window. We pulled up to the building, I helped her with her bags and she barely gave me one last glance before she went inside. I stood half in shock, half pissed off. I paid the driver and took the elevator to the penthouse floor, not thinking twice about it. The doors opened and she was sitting on the couch with her head in her lap.
“I knew you’d follow me up here,” she announced not moving or looking at me.
I walked and sat across from her on the other couch. “What the fuck is going on?”
“What do you want, Devon? You said you wanted to be friends and then you pull that stunt on me last night… you say I’m the one playing games, but so are you.” She looked up at me. “You’re fucking with my head.”
“You started it, Bambi, I wanted to hang out and you came on to me.”
She took a deep breath. “I don’t know how to be any other way. I don’t have friends; I barely have family. This is who I am. It baffles my mind that you still haven’t figured that out yet.”
“Bullshit. It’s not who you are, it’s what you do.”
Her eyes widened. “You know nothing about me. Stop pretending like you do,” she whispered like she didn’t want to be saying it.
“So what? Huh? That means I can’t learn who you are… we can’t see where this goes?”
“Where what goes?” she laughed, surprised. “What, Devon? You want to be my boyfriend? Are you serious? You want us to date and maybe take me home to mom? Right? Maybe meet your son? Is this what you’re hoping for?”
“I don’t know…” I replied, lifting my shoulders. “But I like you and I want to be around you. I care about you and I have fun with you, and in my book there’s nothing wrong with that.”
She shrugged, shaking her head. “I fuck, Devon, I fuck for a living… everything I buy… is money I get from spreading my legs. I don’t know how to be any other way. So when you take me somewhere or you’re nice to me, in the back of my mind all I’m thinking about is when your pants are coming off and your dick is going in my mouth. I’m thinking… I need to even the score, I may let him stick it in my ass. Is that what you want to hear?”
“You don’t deserve to be treated that way.”
“You don’t get it, do you? I WANT to be treated that way. I’m not here because I’m lost, Devon, I’m not Ysabelle. You can’t save me and I don’t want you to. I’m happy. I’ve never been happier than I have since I started VIP. There’s a reason I’ve been here for twelve years.”
“I don’t believe that. Not for a second. I see you, Bambi, and that’s what fucking scares you. You have made up so much psychobabble bullshit in your mind. What happened to you? Come on, everyone has a story, what’s yours?”
She cocked her head to the side and raised an eyebrow. I didn’t know if I wanted to fuck her or strangle her… it may have been a little of both.
“What’s yours? You want to share sad stories then you fucking start, I will gladly follow,” she countered, testing me.
I wanted to tell her, I wanted to tell her so fucking bad that I could taste it. “This isn’t about me.” But I couldn’t. I was hiding as much as she was. We were two of the same.
She cunningly smiled and walked over to me, each step precise and calculated, like she was strategizing with each stride. Once she was in front of me, she got down on her knees. My first initial thought was that she was actually going to try to suck my dick, but when she looked up at me with those big, beautiful baby blue eyes, my mind literally stopped fucking working, and all I could think about was having her sweet little mouth on me.
“Who’s pretending now? Hmmm… it’s not so much fun when you’re on the other side of the questions, is it?” She seductively smiled and raked her fingers against my thighs. “Come on, Devon; let me hear all about your past, your sadness; the fact that you have strong enough sleeping pills to knock out a horse… huh? And when you’re done, I’ll make it all go away… just like in fairytales. I’ll save you,” she crudely mocked.
I couldn’t believe what she was saying and she knew it. She was baiting me, she wanted me to leave or she wanted me to touch her… I think it was both. Though she was also confused, she was testing the waters to see what the outcome would be. She was already on her knees before me, but that wasn’t good enough…
She wanted me on mine, too.
“Awe… what’s wrong?” I sympathized with a snide tone. “Don’t you want to play? Maybe get to know me? I’m your Bambi, don’t you want me to set you free?” I murmured.
His appearance wasn’t at all what I was expecting. It caught me off guard as much as it turned me on. He looked at me like he wanted to che
rish me, like he wanted to pull me into his arms and never let me go. I had never seen anything like it before. No one had ever looked at me like that. This man didn’t know me, but he wanted to. I could see it all over his handsome face. I had gotten under his skin and he couldn’t tell where I began and he ended.
He wanted me.
He needed me.
It was the scariest and most liberating feeling I had ever felt. Like I was standing at the edge of a cliff, ready to jump off. Not knowing or caring if there would be land or water beneath me.
I was ready to take the plunge.
With him…
For me…
For him…
For us?
My mind was scrambled with thoughts and emotions. I couldn’t control, label, or even understand them. It was one giant mess of roses. The exact same ones I hated, but secretly loved.
I wanted him to leave. I wanted him to look at me with disgust and walk away from me; to step into the elevator and out of my life for good.
Except, I didn’t.
I’m lying.
I wanted him to kiss me, to feel his lips on mine and to taste him. We had yet to kiss and I never really cared for it much, but with him I knew it would be different.
He would be different.
We would be different.
I needed it like I needed my next breath.
So I did the only thing that consumed me… the only thing that seemed right in a moment that should have felt wrong.
Should have been wrong.
I put my arms around his neck… and he let me.
I looked deep into his eyes… and saw the same intense gaze, staring back at me.
My chest was rising and lifting with each deep breath I took, and my heart felt like it was beating for him and only him.
And he knew it. I couldn’t hide from him and the worst part was…
I didn’t want to.
So I kissed him.
I kissed with the same ferocity of a million men going to war.