"I know of that very well," he confessed. Edgar moved his gaze to her hand and fingers as they seemed to stroke and soothe the tension from his body. Truth. . . But what of Sabin's affections? Can I betray him in this way?His soul balked at allowing her to be taken from him, but his heart resisted the betrayal of his flesh-and-blood. Of course, whether she married Sabin or not, she still deserved the truth.
"Do you know why I didn't visit you after the final fight with Kefka?" Edgar's question was hesitant. Terra peeked at him out of the corner of her eyes before shaking her head. He took hold of the truth and plunged ahead. "I no longer knew how to talk to you."
Terra looked him full in the face. He looked up and met her eyes. They registered surprise and confusion. "What?" she asked.
Edgar smiled and brushed a damp tendril of hair from her face. "You'd been through so much, Terra. I felt I'd lost the common ground on which we'd once stood. You'd lost your powers. I didn't understand how to move past that."
"B-but. . ."
Edgar released a deep breath. His eyes retreated from hers and again focused on her slight hand in his. "People change, but I fought it as a rebel army fighting the Empire. I was comfortable where I was and didn't want to take the risk. Not even once you and I became so. . . such close friends. It was easier to let you drift away than to admit my fear and ask your help." Edgar caught her gaze again. "I am sorry for that. You deserved more than what I was willing to give, and I didn't see that until it was too late to change it."
"Y-you. . . Y-you didn't mean all those things you said?"
Edgar's brow dropped in confusion. "Things I said? What things?"
"You said you were tired of me hanging all over you expecting your help. Y-you said I was wanting you to baby me and you wanted no part of it--" Her voice broke off as she lowered her eyes.
Edgar's hands tightened on hers as he sought to deliver her from the hurt and confusion. "I never said such things, Terra. You said much the same to me."
Her eyes widened as they rose to meet his. "What?"
He smiled as he caressed her jaw. "From what Cyan and the others tell me, we were fooled."
"Fooled? By who?"
"By a techno-mage named Ledo Grikea."
"What?" Her delicate brows furrowed in a frown of confusion. "When? Why?"
Edgar kissed her cold fingers with a slight chuckle. "Much as I know you would enjoy the tale, the alchemist left explicit instructions that my visit was to be brief." He recognized the desperation he'd seen in her eyes that first visit so many days previous and smiled reassuringly. "You must sleep, Terra. Allow your body to heal, and then I shall tell you the story of your adventure. All right?"
She reluctantly nodded. Edgar stood and tucked the blanket around her, placing a kiss on her forehead. He straightened and gazed down at her innocence and intensity that was so intoxicating. . . "Rest, Terra."
She took in a deep breath and closed her eyes, but her hand gripped his. He allowed the hold to continue as her breathing deepened to sleep, drawing her persona into him though he knew he had to bid it farewell.
~~~
"Terra?" Celes looked down at the pale face with a concerned expression. "How are you doing?"
Terra smiled sleepily, stretching her arms above her head. "I'm doing good," she said finally.
Celes smiled. "All that time in the Empire seems to come back and haunt the both of us, doesn't it? Don't worry about it, though. We got it taken care of, and you should be back to your usual self in a couple months."
Terra slightly nodded. "How are the children?"
"I believe I received a note from Relm saying she was having fun watching them. I think Shadow shows up and gives her a hand every once and awhile."
Terra nodded with a sleepy smile. "Shadow. That man is one walking mystery after another. I never know what to think about him. But he's good to the kids and they love his scary stories just before bed. . ." Terra's voice drifted.
"What's the matter?" Celes asked the question hesitantly.
Terra's eyes met hers. "Edgar's gone back to Figaro, hasn't he?"
Celes' heart skipped a beat with hope as she shook her head. "No, Terra. No, he hasn't."
"What about the ball he was giving to celebrate the building of the new power source in South Figaro? He was supposed to push the switch to make it start running. There was going to be a speech."
Celes smiled. "He made the Chancellor find someone do it for him. He said he couldn't leave here yet. Of course, he also keeps saying it's too soon for us to be talking to you. That you need the rest as much as possible to help you recover. I suppose he's right, but we've all been so worried about you. We wanted a chance to talk to you too."
"I feel awful."
"Why?" Celes asked, laughing. "Edgar said it was no trouble to reschedule his speech with someone else. He even said he wanted to find a way out of it anyway so he could visit you and the kids. After all, it would have been Cera's birthday."
Terra seemed surprised at first. "That would have been so nice. . . It's just my luck something like this would happen."
"Now don't start talking like that. It wasn't your fault at all, and those kids of yours still have plenty of birthdays left. You shouldn't worry about missing only one."
Terra picked at her fingernail and gnawed on her lower lip. Celes noticed, recognizing the hesitation with another twinkle of hope. Hadn't she had a similar hesitation so many times about Locke? About what to say; about what he felt; about what she felt?
"Celes, how do you know when you're in love with someone?"
The smile that twinkled in Celes' eyes lit the entire room. "Some people say 'you just know', but I always viewed that as a weak excuse to keep from delving into what 'love' meant to them."
Terra's glance lifted to Celes' face a moment, but then it lowered back to her fingernail. "What do you mean?"
"Well, it is true that when you love someone you seem to have an instinct about them, but it's more than that. You have an insight into what they feel, or why they act a certain way. You seem to have an uncanny grasp on what to say to make them feel better about themselves or a situation they find themselves in."
Terra's eyes lifted to watch Celes' face. Her mind grappled with the information, but Celes could see it wasn't enough.
"But how do you feel?" Terra pressed.
Celes reached out and took Terra's hand. She gave it a squeeze. "That changes with each person, Terra. What's true for me could be different for you."
"Tell me. Please." And her voice held a touch of desperation.
Celes took in a deep breath and released it slowly. "Let me see. . . It's so hard to put in words. There's just something there that wasn't before. A type of light happiness you take wherever you go. When I see Locke I can't help but smile because my mind wanders to something he's said to me, or a particular way he touched my cheek. . . Something silly like that. It's like he's another version of me because he seems to understand me. What he doesn't understand, he certainly attempts to."
Terra dropped her gaze with several slow nods. "I think I need to be alone for a little bit." Her eyes rose hesitantly to Celes'. "Do you mind?"
"Of course not." Celes smiled down at her as she stood. "You get as much rest as you need. We're not going anywhere until we can take you with us."
"Alright. Thank-you."
Celes left the room and gave Locke and the others the 'thumbs up'.
~~~
Terra stared at the door for several moments before she let herself really think about what Celes had told her. Everything seemed to fit, as if the final piece to a puzzle had been placed ever so carefully by an unknown part of her. I love Edgar?
Somehow the thought wasn't strange, or foreign, or even the least bit unexpected. It was a little awe-inspiring. She, who'd been raised by the Empire and trained to murder and massacre with a simple command, had somehow learned to love. Terra didn't know when or how it had happened, or even how long she'd been hiding the feeling
s, but the truth was too much to ignore.
"I love him," she whispered.
Terra looked away from the door to stare down at her hands. She loved the king of Figaro who saw her as nothing but a child. A source of his amusement. . . But a memory nagged at the back part of Terra's mind. A memory of a look in his eyes when he'd asked about her dreams. What am I going to do? Terra was in an unknown world of emotion and didn't know how to communicate her feelings to her closest friend. . .
Terra took in a slow breath and decided to tell him the only way she knew how: very badly.
11: A Revelation of the Truth
Edgar paced his room; he occasionally glanced out his window toward the alchemist's home to wonder why the others were still there. She needs her rest, he objected. How can they exhaust her this way? It was enough to drive him mad. Not only that, he was afraid Sabin used the time to persuade her to marry him. Blast, he thought harshly, I go through the trouble of getting her out of Zozo in one piece and yet he'll marry her!
"Edgar?"
He turned sharply, focusing on Celes' unsure expression. "Yes?" he asked in a sharp tone.
"Edgar, I need to talk to you."
"About?"
"Well, it's about Terra."
Edgar rolled his eyes. "Don't tell me you want to marry her, too."
Celes blinked in surprise before sending him a confused frown. "What?"
Edgar shook his head and sat heavily into a chair. "Nothing. Never mind."
"I just had a nice talk with her--"
"How is she?" The question was out before he could stop it.
Celes smiled in understanding. "She's doing better, Edgar."
Edgar let out a deep breath as his mood began to change. "Good," he said absently. "Very good." His lips tilted upward in a slight smile before he remembered Celes was in the room. He changed his gaze to her and noticed her hesitant expression. "What is it?"
"What I have to say is hard to phrase right."
Edgar raised an eyebrow. "This is certainly a surprise. You, Celes, usually can tell anyone anything without a problem."
Celes smiled slightly. "It's about Terra and the kids living in Mobliz."
A warning went up in Edgar's mind. "Yes?"
"Do you think it's wise? If this happened once, it could happen again. She doesn't have anyone to look after her there. Everyone's so far away."
"Your point?"
"I was hoping you could help me think of some way to present Terra with the problem. I know she loves it there by herself, and so do the kids, but we have to make her see reason. It's just not safe."
Edgar clenched his jaw. "Whether it's safe or not is beside the point. Mobliz is Terra's home. It's none of our affair whether she stays or not. I agree it isn't as safe as it once was, but the world is slowly changing. She's safer than she would have been a few months ago."
"I know--"
"Celes, Terra is a free spirit. We cannot take it upon ourselves to tell her where it's appropriate to live and where it isn't. Those are her decisions. I am concerned for her as well, but I won't be part of any plan to strong-arm her to another location."
Celes looked insulted. "Strong-arm her?! Of all the. . . I would never force Terra to do something she didn't want to do, Edgar. I had hoped we could help Mobliz become a town again and wondered how to tell her what I wanted to do. After all, she's been on her own for so long. I had hoped you could help me." She stood with fists on hips and glared down at him. "What's gotten into you, Edgar? Every time someone mentions Terra you get defensive. Someone would think you were in love with her."
With that, Celes flounced from the room.
~~~
Terra looked at Sabin with a smile. "Of course you should start a school, Sabin. I think Duncan would approve, don't you? You're silly not to."
"I just don't know if I'm qualified."
"Qualified?" Terra giggled as she gave a slight shake of her head. "Sabin, you've learned all you could from Duncan and made up some new techniques besides. How can you be anything but qualified? I'm sure Edgar would agree. He's so proud of you."
Sabin blinked in surprise. "Edgar? Proud of me? What for?"
"For your dedication to your way of life. It's hard work, and he sees that. The discipline. The long hours of study. The control of your thoughts and body. Sabin, you've worked a long time to get where you are. He knows that, too. I'm sure if you proposed the idea of a school he'd agree to back you."
Sabin stared down at her in silence, and then he grinned. "I'd never thought to ask him. I was going to ask Setzer for a loan."
Terra giggled again. "Setzer? Loan you money? I don't think that's very bright. You couldn't afford to pay him back."
Sabin laughed, turning when there was a quiet knock. Edgar appeared in the doorway. "Hiya, brother. After so many days of insisting she wasn't strong enough, you're finally coming down again, huh?"
Edgar's face changed expressions when he focused on the two together. Terra didn't like it. It made her uneasy. She turned her eyes from Edgar and placed a hand on Sabin's arm, giving him a smile when he faced her. "Sabin, could you give us a minute or two?"
"Sure."
Sabin placed a kiss on her cheek, as had become his custom on his visits to her in Mobliz, and left after clapping Edgar on the shoulder. Edgar made his way further into the room, reluctantly it seemed to Terra, and eventually sat in the chair at her side.
She watched his face and felt a lump of concern grow in her throat. "What's wrong?" she asked.
His eyes changed, as did his face, and he sent her a smile that seemed fake. "Nothing at all, my lady. I was just concerned for you. It didn't seem wise to allow all these visits when you'd only just recovered after being in such a bad way."
"I'm okay. The alchemist. . . What's his name? Well, he said I'm a very fast healer. He's never seen anything like it." Terra remained silent as she tried to give Edgar a chance to voice what bothered him. When he didn't, she pressed on. "Edgar, what's the matter?"
His eyes still didn't meet hers. "I need to ask you a personal question."
"Go ahead." When Edgar finally met her eyes, his were masked. Terra didn't like what it did to his face. He was usually so bright and handsome, but now he seemed haggard and alone. Something was terribly wrong. "Edgar?"
"Are you in lo--" He cut off and clenched his jaw. Then he looked away with a shake of his head.
She intensely watched his face. "Am I in what?"
"Are you lonely?"
Terra blinked and leaned back in surprise and confusion. "What?"
He met her eyes again, and this time he reached forward and took her hand in his. "Terra, all of us agree that it's unwise for you to live so far away. Not when you have so many children to care for. Suppose something of this magnitude were to happen again? I want you to consider allowing me to rebuild Mobliz. To encourage growth. To have the city be as it was before Kefka."
Terra lifted a finger to her lips and absently chewed on the nail. Then she hesitantly lowered her hand. "I think that would be wonderful," she said slowly. "I'll try and be as helpful as I can, as will the children, but. . . W-Was that what you were going to ask?"
Edgar cringed slightly and moved his gaze to stare down at her hand in his. "It's of no import."
"But . . . ." Terra worried her lower lip. "But then you wouldn't look so miserable. Please, Edgar. Tell me what's wrong."
He clenched his jaw. "Sabin asked my permission to marry you."
Terra received the information with shocked silence and another blink. "Sabin?"
Edgar looked up to meet her wide eyes. "Was that not what you discussed when I came in?"
"No," she said in a strange voice. "He was asking my opinion on whether he should start a school--" Her face puckered in a frown of confusion as she leaned slightly forward. "He asked you if he could marry me? Why would he ask you?"
"I don't know," he said quickly as he lowered his eyes.
But there was something about the tone o
f his voice . . . . "Edgar, you're lying to me," she said in a shocked tone. "Why?"
Edgar flinched and stood. She gripped his hand, but he still pulled away. "Lie to a lady? Preposterous!"
Terra sighed and lowered her eyes to her empty hands. "Fine, then I'll ask Sabin why he talked to you instead of me. Then I'll ask him why he hasn't brought it up--" She cut off and pressed her lips together as she lifted her eyes to an intense perusal of his stance. His back was to her, so she couldn't see his face or his eyes. "What did you say to him?"
"I told him he would make you a fine husband."
The silence that settled was uncomfortable, and she almost felt like she couldn't breathe. She tried to adjust her position so that she could examine his profile, but he stood wrong. Desperation and a refusal to let things stay uncomfortable straightened her back and made a slight spark flash in her eyes.
"So where do we go from here?" she asked. "Do we walk away like we did after the fight with Kefka? I didn't like how that felt. I thought you didn't either."
"Terra." was all Edgar said.
Terra stared at his slightly hunched back and felt a strong wave of something so powerful that it opened her mouth and made her say "Edgar" in such a soft tone that she saw his stance change. She swallowed hard and pressed onward. "Edgar, I think I'm in love with you."
Edgar straightened sharply and turned. "What did you say?"
She tried to adjust her position, but it didn't work. She only grimaced in pain and smacked at the blankets in frustration before looking over at him again. He still stood by the window.
The frustration blossomed to irritation. "Why are you just standing there? Why don't you say something? I just told you that I think I love you, Edgar Roni Figaro. So what are you going to do about it?" She crossed her arms. "Well? The ball's in your court, highness."
Edgar stepped forward, lowering himself into the chair across from her so slowly that Terra was sure the world was in slow motion.
"It's bad enough I'm messing the whole thing up," she complained in a choked voice, "but do you have to--" One of his hands came up to stroke her cheek, and Terra jerked back at the unexpected tenderness as well as the warm spark that rumbled within.
"It's all right, Terra," he reassured her. "Trust me. I'm not going to hurt you. I promise you this." And then Edgar lowered his head to brush her lips with his.